


Destiny and Choice - Chapters 1-10

by aubreytruthfully, lostinmymindforever



Series: Destiny and Choice [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, First Time, Foursome - M/M/M/M, High School, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mary Never Died, Mentions of Prostitution, Multi, Naive Castiel, Raised Apart, Romance, Tattoos, Teenage Winchesters, Underage - Freeform, Wincest - Freeform, altered timeline, mentions of drug use, selfcest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-02
Updated: 2013-01-09
Packaged: 2017-11-15 12:12:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 10
Words: 102,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/527176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aubreytruthfully/pseuds/aubreytruthfully, https://archiveofourown.org/users/lostinmymindforever/pseuds/lostinmymindforever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is from an RP that we have been doing for the last few days... we hope you enjoy</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. First Meetings

**Author's Note:**

> This is from an RP that we have been doing for the last few days... we hope you enjoy

Dean Winchester walked into the lunchroom on his first day of his Senior year of high school, a grin on his face. He was excited for this year, his final year in this hellhole called school. Okay true it wasn't like he didn't have friends, or wasn't one of the most popular kids around, but something was missing from his life.  
Dean smiled at a few of his classmates as he looked around, deciding where he was going to sit this year. He noticed an unfamiliar face at one of the tables. A freshman, obviously, but Dean made it his business to know everyone in town, and this kid, Dean didn't know. The younger boy looked lost, as if he didn't have a friend in the world. Dean made up his mind, plopping down in the seat across from the boy. He stuck out his hand, "Hey, I'm Dean."

Sam had been dreading his freshman year. It wasn't that he wasn't smart or something like it. It was that he never fit in. Anywhere. It had always been like that, even though his mom told him all the time that he just hadn't met the right people.

Sitting by himself wasn't a big shock or anything, but as he stared out around the room, it made him feel a little lost. The room was filled with all these people. Friends, couples, clubs, groups. People who were all somehow connected in one way or another. But not Sam. At least until he saw a boy catch his eye. Surely, he wasn't walking over to Sam. That seemed impossible. The boy was probably just heading over to a group of his friends and Sam was somehow imagining the eye contact.

The boy saw across of him, a smile on his face--a little too charming and almost mischievous. "Hey, I'm Dean."

Sam struggled to think of words. Any words. Words of any kind whatsoever. "I, uh," Sam cleared his throat, "I'm Sam." He made a sad attempt at a smile, feeling too awkward in the sudden social situation.

Dean noticed that the kid was nervous, and let out a small laugh, making sure that the boy could tell he wasn't being picked on by the look on Dean's face. "Pleasure to meet you, Sammy. So you're new in town aren't you?" He grinned at the other boy, staring at him intently. There was something about him that seemed to pull at Dean in a way he couldn't understand, something about those hazel eyes that made Dean want to never  
stop looking at them. Dean realized he was staring, and looked down bashfully, not quite sure what he was feeling. No one had made Dean feel this bashful since he was a little kid, but Sam? Sam was a mystery to Dean.

When Dean laughed it was a relaxing chiming noise. Maybe the guy wasn't trying to play some prank on him. Sam stared a little at his full lips when he spoke. Quickly, he glanced back up, but that didn't help anything. Suddenly, he was lost in nothing but green. They looked so familiar, like something he had dreamt of once. Dean's eyes were staring right back at him and he was finding it difficult to speak again. It was like Dean was looking into his soul, but Sam couldn't look away. Well, couldn't until Dean did.

"I, uh," Damn, he really needed to stop saying 'uh' all the time, "Yeah, I just moved here." Sam made an attempt to sound more confident and it earned another little grin from Dean.

He watched as Dean glanced down, eyes peeking out from underneath lashes, "And it's nice to meet you too," Sam's voice ended a little softer than intended.

Why did it feel like he knew Dean? Maybe he had just seen him one day around town when he was moving into his new house. Maybe it was just some freak thing. But it didn't feel like that. It felt real. Sam looked away again since his eyes were attempting to revolt against the no staring rule.

The kid was adorable, 'where did that come from' but Dean could tell that he wasn't used to people being nice to him. There was something so endearing about the way Sam was acting so nervous around him, like he was expecting Dean to do something horrible and was hoping that he wouldn't.

"So, since you are new around here you don't know where anything is do you?" Dean asked, taking a bite of his sandwich, confused to why his eyes kept drifting back to Sam's. Dean swore if he didn't know any better that Sam was looking all the way into his soul, and part of him was uncomfortable with that.

While Dean was popular, he really didn't have many close friends, not ones that he could tell anything to, ones that wouldn't judge him. To most people he was "that jock" or "that kid who works on cars" or "the guy who would put out for anyone", it was kind of nice meeting someone who didn't have a clue about him. Someone who was maybe like him, just looking for someone to actually give a damn about the real him and not what they  
thought he should be.

"So, I could, you know, maybe show you around sometime, not that there is much around here to see, but you know..." he trailed off, feeling like an idiot.

Listening to Dean talk was possibly the best thing that had happened in Sam's life to date. The older boy's voice a little rougher, but somehow still holding a smiling tone in it. He listened closely to every word, and Sam's eyes couldn't decide if they wanted to watch the mouth that was speaking or the eyes that were too alluring for their own good. He couldn't believe that someone like Dean would every consider talking to him. Just by  
looking at Dean he could see every stereotypical "popular guy" trait in him. If anything, Dean should be the guy who knocked his books out of his hands in the hallway, not the kid--who was now looking at him for an answer to something--who wanted to sit with him at lunch.

Sam rewound things in his mind to catch up to what the conversation was. He really didn't want to seem like he wasn't paying attention. "Yeah," Sam nodded, "I'd really lov--That'd be cool if you showed me around." He ended his reply with a grin and he couldn't help but grin wider when he saw that Dean was also smiling.

Was he actually making a friend?

And not just that. Was he actually becoming friends with someone as cool as Dean?

Dean smiled when Sam said yes to his request, a smile that very few people had actually ever seen, one that wasn't forced or faked. He licked his lips absently, eyes still being drawn to the other boy's. "So, um, do you have plans after school? I mean, do you need to be home right away, or..." he trailed off with a shrug.

He could see a few of his friends sitting a few tables over, motioning him to come sit with them. He shook his head, looking back at Sam, "Oh, so um, did you need a ride or anything? I mean home from school, 'cause I have a car, not a great one, but she runs."

Dean started mentally hitting himself in the head, could he be anymore pathetic, god he was sounding like some nervous kid asking someone out on a date. Not that there would be a problem asking Sam on a date, he was cute, but Dean didn't want to risk screwing up what could be a good friendship in the making, a real friendship, by mixing teenage hormones into things. The kid was distracting, Dean would admit that, he was cute, particularly when he smiled and dimples appeared on his cheeks.

Sam was thinking about how he should answer Dean, but then Dean started talking again and his answer got all jumbled up in his head. He contemplated if his mom would be irritated if he caught a ride home with a--senior? junior?--upperclassman. Nah, she'd be happy he was making friends. She was always worrying about him not having any friends.

He thought that maybe Dean sounded a little nervous, but that had to be his imagination. How could someone like that ever get nervous? Dean didn't seem like the shy type.

Sam had planned on walking home. It was just a couple miles. He could make it. But. He didn't really want to walk home. And Dean was asking him if he could take him home. Someone was actually offering him something. "Are you sure that it's okay?" Sam had meant to say 'yes' but somehow answered a question with a question, "I mean, I don't want to waste your gas money or anything." Wow...he was possibly the most awkward person in the universe. Sam stared down at his hands, feeling his cheeks getting a little red,because why couldn't he just say 'yes'? His leg moved nervously under the table. "I just," Sam sighed, "you don't have to take me home or anything. I was going to walk anyways."

So much for making friends.

Could he just go mentally kick himself forever now or?  
Dean grinned so hard that his cheeks were starting to hurt, but he couldn't really care about that, "No, it's not a problem. I really want to give you a ride." Dean paused, realizing how what he had said could have sounded. "That is, um, unless you don't want a ride home, I mean I figured I'd give you that tour of town before I took you home, but..." he sighed, looking down at his lunch. "Listen, I'm not trying to make you uncomfortable or anything. Am I? Because I don't want to, you seem nice and I just, I just thought that maybe you'd want to be friends."

Dean knew that most of the people in the lunch room couldn't hear their conversation, but he knew that there were eyes on them. There were always eyes on Dean, and most of the time it made him jumpy. Hell most of the time if he could get away with it he'd go eat lunch under the stairs, just so people wouldn't watch him. He bit his lip, giving Sam a hopeful look. 

"I really want to give you a ride," well that didn't help the furious blushing that was currently attacking Sam's face. As if being a hormonal 13 year old wasn't bad enough. Now it felt like someone was just encouraging it, although he doubted that was true.

Sam's eyes darted up at the mention of friends. Dean. Wanted to be. SAM's friend? What? Dean said that he wasn't trying to make Sam uncomfortable. Dean said that he thought Sam seemed nice. Dean said that he wanted to be friends. He noticed that Dean was biting at his lip--which was a little too...much...for Sam. "You want to be friends?" There he went again, saying the stupidest things possible. Why was he even born with vocal cords? It must've been some sick cosmic joke. "Sorry, that's not what I mean to say," because this was making it better..., "I'd like a ride...um, home. I'd like a ride home and a tour of the town sounds," Dean was grinning at him? "sounds nice." But it wasn't some you-sound-like-an-idiot grin, it just looked like Dean was happy.

Suddenly, Sam felt very aware of the fact that they were in public. When Dean glanced around the room, Sam did too. Eyes were on Dean. Eyes were on them. Now that made Sam a little uncomfortable.

Dean smiled, glad that Sam had said yes to coming with him after school. He wasn't quite sure how he would have reacted if Sam had said no to him. He looked up at the clock, noticing that there was still time before lunch was over. "Wanna go sit somewhere that isn't, well, here?" He asked, looking up to catch Sam's eyes again, a bit puzzled to the blush that was covering the freshman's face. "I mean, there's quieter places to eat, that are away from everybody."

He smiled, hoping that he didn't look like as big an idiot as he was sounding. "And yeah, I'd like to be friends. Why? Is there some sort of law that says I shouldn't?" He shrugged, looking bashful again, "Kinda surprised that you'd want to be MY friend."

Sam about choked when Dean asked him if he wanted to go sit somewhere else, but he held it in. However, the blush wasn't exactly something he could just will away. Actually, the more he tried to will it away, the worse it got. He tried not to think about it.

He picked up his bookbag and slung it over one shoulder, following Dean out of the lunchroom. He couldn't believe his ears. Laws against being Sam's friend. There probably should be. Something along the lines of, 'All those who befriend Sam Campbell will be sentenced to complete social suicide' Not that he was about to say that. When the older boy ducked his head and said he was surprised Sam wanted to be friends with him...that was the biggest shock of all. It took all of Sam's willpower to not just stop walking and  
possible spontaneously combust. Instead, he took a deep breath and thought for a second BEFORE he opened his mouth (which is something he should start consider doing more often...) "You don't catch me as the type of guy who can't get friends," Sam stated. Had that come out rude? Or maybe a little accusing? He didn't mean it like that. "Not that I would really know or anything," Sam looked down, "I mean, I don't really know you. I shouldn't, uh, make assumptions."

There Sam was, trying to fix a situation before one had even occurred.

Dean led them to his hiding spot, sitting down on the floor motioning Sam to follow him, "I don't have friends, I mean, not really. Pretty much everyone has all these ideas about me, and that's the only thing they see. No one here really knows me, hell I think almost everyone here doesn't even know each other." He sighed, biting into his apple, "It's kinda nice meeting someone, someone who doesn't give a damn about all that bullshit."  
He shrugged, staring at the younger boy.

Dean's instinct was to kiss him, or something, but he was fighting the urge. He didn't have a clue if Sam was even interested in guys, let alone him, and didn't want to risk destroying what could actually be a REAL friendship before it got the chance to start.

"Wanna know a secret?" Dean asked, looking into those damn hazel eyes that were so hypnotic.

Sam couldn't believe the words that Dean was saying. It was like he had meandered his way into Sam's head and pulled out the hidden thoughts there. If someone like Dean could feel like that, maybe Sam wasn't so messed up. He never felt like anyone knew him--never felt like anyone even tried. But here was Dean, feeling the same way. It made Sam feel a little awed. And maybe Sam did care a little about the bullshit and what other people thought, but he wasn't going to stop this perfect realization that Dean felt like Sam did. No, he was going to savor that.

For a second, it was quiet. They were both sitting a little too close. Although, Sam could stand to sit a little closer. He thought that maybe Dean had leaned in a little, but it was obviously in his head, because Dean started talking again. "Wanna know a secret?" Green eyes were piercing through him, a little gleam and maybe a little fear lingering in them.  
Honestly, Sam wanted to know every secret that Dean had, but he'd settle for one.

"Sure," he answered nonchalantly despite the overwhelming eagerness rising in his stomach.

Dean swallowed, for a second there it had looked like he was about to kiss him, but that wasn't the case, it couldn't be. That would be too perfect, like a gift that Dean hadn't realized he had wanted until he didn't get it. "So, I never wanted to go into sports. I only did it to please my dad. I mean yeah, I'm good at it, but I don't want to do it, not really. I kinda always wanted to be a cheerleader." He looked down, blushing, not sure why he was telling Sam this, but there was something about the other boy that made him feel like he could trust him, trust him with not only that, but with all his secrets.

'It would be nice to have someone like that,' Dean thought, looking at his hands. "I kinda also wanted to join the drama club, but my dad wouldn't let me. Told me it wasn't proper for someone like me to do that."

Dean shrugged, the motion bumping his shoulder into Sam's. He felt like a jolt passed through him, and his breath caught in his throat. "Hehe, never told anyone that." He looked over, hoping that he wasn't driving the other boy away. Part of Dean, a big part of him, wanted to just reach over and brush Sam's bangs off his face, wanted to cup Sam's chin an pull him in for a kiss. But Dean wouldn't make a move, not like that, he didn't want Sam to just think this was about sex, but god was the other boy distracting him  
something fierce, causing him to wonder what Sam looked like naked, wonder what he would sound like moaning with pleasure.

Sam watched Dean's throat move as he swallowed and that alone was almost enough to get him going. 'Stop thinking about that' he scolded himself. 

Wait. What? Dean wanted to be a cheerleader? That helped all of absolutely nothing, because he could just see how flexible Dean would be--and no no no no. Sam pulled his bag onto his lap; there was no reason for Dean to know that Sam was getting half-hard by thinking about him being a cheerleader. What if he wore a skirt once? Nope. Done. 'Quit it!' his thoughts scolded him again.

But then Sam was saddened by what Dean was saying. His own dad couldn't even support something as simple as being in a freakin' play or two? That seemed so ridiculous. Granted, Sam could never be on a stage, that was terrifying, but his mom was always supportive of his art.

When Dean shrugged, their shoulders bumped. It was like electricity, but in a non-painful way. Dean had never told anyone these things and it just made Sam feel the electricity again, because it made him feel special and important. Dean trusted him, like really trusted him, and they had just met. Then again, am was finding himself falling all over the place over Dean, and he barely knew him. He wanted to just kiss him, but he didn't  
think that'd be a good idea. He doubted that Dean even liked boys. And Sam had only ever had one kiss--and it was definitely a defining moment in his sexuality. Girls did not do it for him, that's what his first and only kiss had proved.

"Well, I think that you could definitely be good at acting or cheering," Sam smiled, "or anything really. You seem like someone who's got enough talent for five people."

'Wow,' Sam thought, 'way to be cheesy...'

Dean blushed, ducking his head. 'Is this kid for real? God knowing my luck I've gone crazy and am just imagining him and talking to myself.' 

"Naw, I'm nothing special. Just the jock son of an alcoholic former marine mechanic." Dean's eyes widened as he realized what he had said.

'Shit, why did you say that, stupid, worthless, idiot' that little voice in the back of his head scolded him, the one that sounded a hell of a lot like his father. He laughed nervously, "Forget I said that, okay." He looked into Sam's eyes, silently pleading with the other boy. "So, um, tell me something about you, anything at all."

He bit his lip again, trying to will Sam to change the topic. 'He smells amazing,' Dean thought, the random thought making his blush intensify and making him glad that he was wearing baggy jeans today. It wouldn't do to have Sam see how much he was effecting Dean, how much Dean just wanted to do nothing more than kiss the boy senseless.

Sam's lips parted, wanting to say something about Dean's obvious poor excuse for a dad. He wanted to say that he understood. He wanted to say that he didn't have a dad. He wanted to say that he knew it was hard sometimes. But Dean told him to forget, so he didn't say anything.

Dammit, and then he did the lip biting thing again and Sam squeezed onto his bag a little tighter, trying to will away any blood that was deciding to flow places it didn't need to be.

"Something about me?" Sam asked, realizing how nervous he sounded. People didn't really ask about him. People accused him of things, but asking wasn't a typical thing for him. He wasn't sure what to say. There wasn't anything that Sam did that was remotely impressive. It wasn't like he was a jock, or could act, or could cheer, or could be as attractive as Dean. Sam was just. Well, Sam was just Sam. He was just an awkward, too tall, too skinny, freshman kid who made good grades and sometimes doodled in his  
notebook. What could he possibly say that would make Dean be remotely interested in him. "Well, I like art I guess," It actually saddened Sam that this was the best he could come up with.

Dean smiled, an honest to god smile, the one he seemed to be using a lot today. There was something about Sam that just seemed to bring it out of him. "What kind of art do you like?" he asked, completely serious about wanting the answer.

He finally noticed how Sam was clutching at his bag, realizing that he wasn’t the only one feeling anything. He decided that he had to kiss Sam, just once. Hopefully he wasn't reading something that wasn't there.

Dean leaned in, his lips just about to touch Sam's when the bell rang. "Damn it all," he complained, knowing that he had to get to class. "So, um, I'll meet you out front after school, okay? We're still on for that, right?" Dean hoped he didn't sound like he was begging Sam to meet him, but he prayed that Sam would still want him to show him around. "I'm still giving you that ride I promised, right?"

Sam could barely breathe, because Dean's lips were right there. He could feel the boy's breath and it was giving him goosebumps. Their lips were so close and Sam had closed his eyes, leaning in a little, because there was nothing more that he wanted at the moment. Then the stupid damn bell started ringing and Sam didn't want to go to class! When he heard Dean curse at the bell, it made him feel a little bit more reassured. Dean was talking and asking questions and Sam was still stuck on the fact that their lips had almost touched. He almost got kissed. How was he supposed to answer anything when that had just happened?

"Um," Sam nodded, but didn't really know why, "Yeah, front of the school. Rides and stuff." Holy shit, what the fuck was coming out of his mouth? He stood up quickly, mumbling something of a goodbye before hurrying off to his next class--cursing himself the entire way.

The day went by as slow as anything had ever gone. Every class felt like more of a chore than usual, he couldn't focus, because all he could think about were Dean's lips. You know, the ones that almost touched his? Yeah, those lips. He attempted to work and take notes, but it was impossible. Sam got lucky that no teacher wanted to pick him to answer questions. It was the first time in his life that Sam was happy about being the new kid--and he had been a new kid more times than he liked to think about. His mom had said that she wanted to stay here though, so maybe he and Dean really could become good friends, or maybe. Maybe more?

As soon as the final bell rang, Dean practically ran out of the classroom, stopping at his locker just long enough to grab his things before rushing down the stairs to meet Sam outside. He ran his fingers through his short hair, biting his lips. Dean couldn't remember ever being this nervous before in his life. He wanted to make a good impression on Sam, wanted to spend time with the other boy. Just plain wanted Sam. He couldn't remember ever wanting anything or anyone as much as he wanted Sam.

But he was scared, what if, what if he *had* been reading things wrong, what if Sam didn't want him. What if Dean was just seeing what he wanted to see because Sam was the first person to ever give a damn about him. These thoughts raced through his head as he leaned against the building, waiting for Sam to come out. Dean was starting to get concerned, most of the other kids had already left the building, getting onto buses, or into cars, and Sam still hadn't walked out.

He was starting to think that maybe he had been stood up, maybe he had scared the other boy off when he tried to kiss him, when he saw Sam walking out the doors. When Sam reached him, Dean let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding. "Hey, um, so how was your first day here?"

Sam was in his last class, already preparing his legs for take-off when the bell rang. He jolted out through the door--Sam contemplated going to his locker, but decided that he could manage to carry his textbooks in his bag for one night. Dean was more important at the current moment. Racing towards the front of the school, he was stopped. No, no, no, no. Sam groaned inwardly when it was the counselor. He answered politely to all of her questions about his first day, but his foot was tapping furiously. 'Please hurry up,' he thought. Finally, she told him to have a good evening and walked away.

By the time he managed to get to the front of the school, most of the kids had left. He  
eye searched frantically for Dean--he tried imagining what Dean would be driving, but decided that was pointless. Finally, he turned the corner of the building and Dean was leaned up against the wall, just waiting. 'Oh thank fucking God' Sam sighed in relief  
and tried not to seem like he was hurrying to get to Dean. He needed to play this cool. He had to play this cool.

Sam smiled a little when Dean asked how his first day was. "It was, uh," he couldn't stop a grin from forming, "better than any other first day I've ever had." And damn was that the truth. Mostly, Sam had terrible first days. All the moving around his mom made him do (for reasons that he wasn't allowed to talk about...not that he would anyways, because why would anyone believe that shit?) made him resent school period. He was always the new kid who didn't have any friends and who didn't fit in. However, his mom said that she was going to try and settle down here. Things were going to chance, at least, that's what Sam was hoping for. So far, so good. After all, meeting Dean already topped everything else that had ever happened to him anyways.

Dean grinned, nodding once before turning to walk towards the parking lot. It felt odd having someone walk with him to his car, well his car nowadays anyway, she used to belong to his father, odd in a good way though. He smiled when they reached the car, opening the back door and tossing his backpack in.

"So, there's really not much to see around here," he said with a shrug, motioning for Sam to put his books into the car, "a lot of fields, and whatnot, but I promised you the tour." He grinned as Sam slipped into the seat next to him, looking like he was always meant to sit there.

They pulled out of the parking lot, driving in silence for a short while, before Dean pulled over. He turned to face Sam, biting his lip before speaking, "Listen, earlier, I, um, I didn't do anything that made you uncomfortable, did I? I mean when I tried to, well you know."

He was blushing again, seemed like that was all he was doing today, it felt a little odd, but it also felt a lot right. He unconsciously leaned in towards Sam, getting so close he could smell the distracting scent that was pure Sam.

The car seemed oddly familiar and Sam felt weird at how easy it was for him to slip into the passenger's seat. When he glanced over at Dean, it felt like he was supposed to be there. It felt like this was their spot in the world. Sitting in this car, beside each other, was exactly where they were supposed to be. All these feelings were a little overwhelming, but the music playing helped Sam not focus too harshly on it.

When they pulled over, there was a part of Sam hoping that maybe Dean was just going to lean over and finish that kiss that he started earlier today. But that wasn't exactly what happened, "Listen, earlier, um, I do anything that made you uncomfortable, did I? I mean when I tried to, well you know."

Sam almost laughed. Dean making him uncomfortable because he tried to kiss him? It seemed like such an abstract idea, that Sam's brain was actually struggling to wrap around it. Dean continued to stare at him with emerald eyes, just waiting for an answer and Sam felt that they were closer together, he could smell Dean, but it didn't feel like enough. "Uncomfortable?" Sam asked, but could barely focus, "No, um," his cheeks  
started flushing, "You, uh, didn't make me feel," the redness felt like it was spreading over his entire body, because he honestly didn't think he'd ever felt this embarrassed, "Iwasn'tuncomfortable." And it came out all at once, because he needed to break eye contact before his soul decided to spill every secret he'd ever had to Dean. Sam decided that green eyes were his favorite. He decided that a few hours ago.

"I didn't mean to," Sam looked down, "I mean, I shouldn't have," what were words again? "I'm sorry about trying to, um, kiss you earlier too." Sam gnawed nervously at his lip.

Dean swallowed, licking his lips nervously, eyes locked with Sam's. He nodded once, closing the distance between them, brushing his lips gently against the younger boy's. It felt like an electric charge surged through his body as their lips touched. No one had ever made him feel like this before, and if a simple chaste kiss was almost enough to blow Dean's mind, he could only imagine what anything else would do.

But still, he needed to know that Sam was okay with this, "Sam, Sammy, can I, can I kiss you again? Was that okay?" He gazed into those hypnotic hazel eyes, feeling like he was drowning in the other boy.

Sam's mind felt like it was misfiring when Dean's lips brushed against his for all of 3 seconds. It wasn't enough, not at all. Sam tried to chase after those perfect lips, but they were already gone. Dean was looking at him with this terrified look in his eyes and Sam wondered if maybe he had done something wrong. After all, he was new at this. Maybe he was just that bad of a kisser.

But then.

Well, then Dean asked if he could kiss him again. He called him Sammy. No one called him Sammy. He hated when people called him Sammy, but for some reason, it felt good when Dean said it. The little nickname made his skin feel hot and needy. There were no more words for Sam, he'd used them all already. He gripped Dean's shirt tightly and pulled him in for another kiss. He pulled a little too rough, and the initial contact hurt a little. Both of them making a little 'oof' noise, but Dean didn't pull away, so Sam  
couldn't complain. 

Dean groaned into the kiss, feeling like he had died and went to heaven. Nothing had ever felt so perfect, so right, as kissing Sam did. Okay, yeah, maybe it was a little awkward kissing in the front seat of the car, but it was making him feel things he had never felt before. The way Sam's lips molded against his, like they were made to be doing this, made to be kissing each other. Dean's fingers snaked into Sam's hair as he  
kissed the younger boy. He pulled back briefly to catch his breath, resting his forehead against Sam's.

He let out a curse when he bashed his elbow against the steering wheel as he had been reaching to grab at Sam's shirt. "Sammy, I want, I want to go somewhere more private. Somewhere we'll have more room."

Dean knew his father wouldn't be home, he barely was anymore, but he wasn't sure if Sam would want to come home with him.

Heart hammering in his chest, Sam kissed Dean with everything he had. Nothing had ever felt like this. Granted, there weren't thousands of kisses for Sam to compare, but something about this just screamed that it was different from anything else in the world. He barely knew Dean--deep down, he knew that--but he trusted him wholeheartedly. He felt like he had known Dean his entire life. He felt all this trust and love and it was all so  
fresh and unexplained. Nothing made sense, but as long as Dean's mouth was still on his, it didn't matter that much.

Sam didn't mean to whine a little when Dean pulled away, but he felt better when Dean's forehead was touching his.

Everything stopped when Dean said that he wanted to go somewhere private. It would be careless for Sam to say yes to that. It would be reckless for Sam to go somewhere with Dean. It would be stupid for Sam to blindly trust him. "Okay," Sam breath out heavily. Well, careless, reckless, stupid, or whatever else, Sam had just said okay and he didn't feel regret or fear.

Although, there was a little reminder in his mind that said he had to be home by 9 or his mom might flip out. He could deal with that later though, right now all he could think about was the fact that Dean wanted to be somewhere private him HIM. Once again, his heart start pounding too fast.

Dean drove them to his house, heart pounding in his chest. He had never once done anything like this, never once brought anyone home with him. When they passed the house four doors down from his, he noticed Sam start grinning. He pulled into the driveway, quickly exiting the car and grabbing his backpack, "That's where you live, isn't it?"

He hoped that that was Sam's house, that would mean they were neighbors, that would mean he could give Sam rides to school and no one would question it. He fumbled with the keys, unlocking his door, motioning for Sam to follow him inside. "Sorry about the mess," he said sheepishly, leading Sam towards his bedroom.

The overwhelming joy over the fact that they were neighbors was almost too much. Sam tried to keep his head down a little, hoping that his mom wouldn't spot him going into a "strangers" house.

Sam jumped in surprise a little when Dean grabbed his hand and started leading him through the house before entering Dean's room. Dean apologized for the mess, but Sam couldn't focus on much outside of the fact that he was here with Dean in his room and they were alone and this was fucking insane wasn't it? They were both quiet, not sure what to do next. Sam wanted to kiss him again, but felt nervous. He wondered if maybe Dean felt the same way. Now that they were alone and in an open room, there wasn't a  
whole of lot hiding to be done. Sam didn't know what to do, but it would be too easy for him not to ruin the mood.

"You've got a nice room," Sam commented, and there went the mood. 

Sam sighed, "Sorry, I just, I'm kind of nervous...and..." Sam trailed off, but when he looked up, Dean's eyes still held their hungry gleam. Maybe the mood wasn't ruined after all.

Dean bit his lip, watching the other boy closely. This was almost too perfect, as if someone was giving Dean everything he could have ever asked for. He was as nervous as Sam was, and swallowed hard. He reached out, grabbing Sam by the shirt gently, pulling the younger boy against his body.  
He cupped Sam's face in his hand, tilting his face up so that Dean could kiss him.

Dean moaned when Sam wrapped his arms around his neck, arching into Dean's body. Dean couldn't remember ever wanting anyone as much as he wanted Sam. He could kiss him forever and still want more. Dean walked backwards towards his bed, sitting down when his legs hit the side of it. He pulled Sam down along with him, groaning as Sam straddled his thighs, their lips never leaving each other's as the kiss intensified.

Dean knew they should be going slow, god they had just met that afternoon, but Sam was perfect. Sam was everything he had ever wanted and more.

Sam practically melted when Dean's lips were on his again. All he could do was just lean into it, because Dean's hands were touching him and Dean's lips were touching him and nothing else really mattered.

Finally, Sam's body decided that he was capable of reacting, so he wrapped his arms around Dean's neck and pressed their bodies as close as he could get. Sam couldn't remember ever wanting anything as much as he wanted Dean. He never wanted this kiss to stop; he could keep their lips pressed together for the rest of eternity and have no qualms about it. Dean's tongue was twisting and curling around his, just a wet, slow slide. It made Sam feel like he was on fire.

He hadn't even realized they were moving until he was being pulled down along with Dean on the bed. Sam put his legs on either side of Dean, never parting lips. Sam's hands tugged and pulled at the abomination of fabric that kept Dean's torso covered. Logically, he knew that he'd have to pull away from the kiss to get the shirt off. However, Sam was determined that he could just will the shirt away. That could happen right?

It started sinking in that maybe they were moving too fast. They'd just met--quite literally. They didn't really know anything about each other. But Sam felt like he'd known Dean forever, he felt like he knew every corner of Dean's mind, no matter how crazy that seemed.

Dean groaned into the kiss, his hands trailing up and down Sam's back. There was something so utterly perfect about having him in his arms, like Sam was made to fit against Dean perfectly. Dean knew he would never want to give this feeling up, this sense of being where he was supposed to be for the first time in his life. "So good," he whispered, pulling back long enough to yank his shirt over his head, moaning as Sam's hands brushed his skin.

He tugged at the hem of Sam's shirt, "Off, please, off."

God things were going fast, too fast if truth be told, but damn if Dean didn't feel like this was the only thing that mattered, getting closer to Sam, making him his. He looked deeply into Sam's eyes, knowing that the other boy could see everything, as if Dean was a completely open book to him that Dean wanted him to read and memorize.

Sam's hands were on Dean's skin the moment his shirt came off. Dean's skin was hot and soft and Sam could barely think about anything else. All that was in his mind was this constant want for Dean. He wondered if maybe Dean felt the same way.

He obeyed when Dean told him to take his shirt off. It was more of an instinct to listen to the older boy. That feeling that he'd known Dean forever forced its way back into Sam's mind. All thoughts were fading fast when Dean's hands touched him. They weren't bigger than his own, but they were softer. Dean's hands hadn't been through the ringer a thousand times over. However, it was obvious that his hands were strong enough to handle going through the ringer.

Sam's eyes felt like they couldn't see enough of Dean. He just wanted to soak up every part of Dean's skin and muscles. It almost felt like too much; Sam was overwhelmed with sensation. 

Dean swallowed hard as his hands traveled down Sam's body, his fingers coming across scars every so often. He knew there were stories behind each and every one of them, and wanted to know them all. His hands mapped Sam's body as their tongues dueled each other. Dean wanted anything and everything Sam would give him, but he wasn't going to pressure the younger boy, he wouldn't go farther than Sam wanted, no matter how good this felt.

"Are you okay with this?" he asked again, resting his forehead against Sam's. He NEEDED to know he wasn't rushing Sam. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if they did something and then Sam later regretted it. There was just something about Sam that made him want to actually give a damn about him, and not just worry about himself.

Dean couldn't hold back a moan as Sam's hands moved on his flesh, the way his hands so different than any he had ever felt before. "Sammy, god, your hands, so amazing."

Sam suddenly became very aware of the scars on his body. It made him shudder when Dean's fingers would trace lighter over his markings. He felt self-conscious. Dean's flesh was so perfect and clean. Sam's was scarred and marked by things that Sam preferred not to think about.

He wanted to whine when Dean pulled away, but he could still feel the boy's breath on his skin, so he refrained. "Are you okay with this?" The question hardly felt necessary. At this point, Sam was okay with whatever Dean wanted to do. Just as long as he kept touching him and kissing him. It didn't even occur to Sam that maybe they shouldn't do this.

Sam wanted Dean so badly, couldn't stop running his hands over what felt like miles of paler skin. His hands stumbled and stuttered over Dean's body. His own inexperience becoming apparent and a little embarrassing, but Dean just spoke encouraging words.

"Dean," Sam murmured, "I am really okay with this." He smiled against the other boy's lips.

"Dean!" A loud voice echoed through the house and that certainly killed the mood. That killed Sam's soul at the current moment, because he was shirtless and needing and there was Dean.

"Who's that?" Sam looked at Dean.

Dean cursed under his breath, before answering, "Yeah, Dad? I'm home." 

He pulled on his shirt with a sigh, not really wanting to but not wanting to risk his father just walking into his room and seeing him, seeing them together.

Dean wasn't ashamed of Sam, far from it, he just didn't want his father starting anything, Dean knew damn well that his dad already had a low enough opinion of him, he didn't want to add to it. He turned to face Sam, a small pout on his face as he watched Sam yank his shirt back on. He could hear John stumbling around downstairs, ahh it had been one of those days, days where more drinking than work had happened, and knew that the man would probably pass out on the couch.

"Sam," Dean whispered, kissing him once more, "this sucks, I am so sorry that he had to ruin this." He looked down, blushing, "Want me to walk you home? I mean that is if you want me to. I'd like to."

Sam hurriedly pulled his shirt back on. If that was Dean's dad, he really didn't want to embarrass Dean. It didn't sound like Dean's dad was coming down the hall and Sam's heart stopped racing quite as quickly. Today was just determined to give the poor kid a heart attack.

He watched Dean's reactions carefully, hoping that Dean wouldn't be ashamed of Sam meeting his dad. Sam wasn't exactly the kind of guy that people like Dean hang out with--let alone make out with.

Sam grinned with relief when Dean offered to walk him home. It wasn't that Sam couldn't make it to his house, but being around Dean would make it better. Maybe his mom had dinner ready and Dean could eat at his house. Or was that weird? He'd just wait. But he wanted to show Dean off to his mom, show her that he'd made a friend (he'd save the other part of the story for a later date).

"Yeah, I'd really lov--" Sam paused, "It'd be cool if you walked me home."

Dean grinned, kissing Sam briefly before slinging his arm around his shoulders. They walked out of the house, going out the back door and around the house to pick up Sam's things from the car. Dean knew that the walk should only take them a few minutes, but he wanted to make the most of them. He didn't want to take Sam home, he wanted to spend more time with him. But he knew that his father wouldn't be in the mood for company. 

Dean sighed, trying to think about what was in the fridge for supper, realizing that groceries hadn't been gotten yet this week. "So, today's been good, right?" he asked Sam, ignoring the empty feeling in his stomach that he knew was from more than just hunger. He didn't want Sam to leave him, he felt like a part of him was being ripped away as they walked up Sam's front steps.

Dean looked around nervously, wanting to give Sam a quick kiss goodbye before walking home, but didn't know if he should.

Sam felt butterflies when Dean put his arm around him. It felt so unreasonably natural and perfect. Although, he wondered about Dean's dad considering that Dean had blatantly avoided him just now by leading them out the back door of the house. Sam was trying to think about how he was supposed to go about asking Dean to come inside, maybe have some dinner or something. Then Dean asked him about today had been.

'Perfect. Excellent. Possibly the best day of my life. Definitely the best day of my life. How is anything ever going to top today? I think I'm falling in love with you, and I don't even know you. That's how today has been.' was what Sam thought. He decided maybe that wasn't the best thing to say. "It's been great," Sam ducked his head, feeling like he was smiling too much--it probably made him look like a goon. He didn't want Dean to  
leave, but he couldn't think of something to say. What was his problem with words today? Oh right, Dean's existence.

Dean glanced around before leaning in towards Sam. His fingers brushed against Dean's hands, a phantom attempt to pull him in.

"I was wondering when you'd get home," his mom was standing on the porch, her smile a little too wide and proud.

"Um," Sam blushed, "I was hanging out with my friend Dean."

Sam furrowed his brows when he saw his mom's face. She looked at Dean with the most bizarre expression, as if she could not believe who was standing in front of her. Granted, Sam didn't make friends easily, but this reaction seemed a little bit much. He wasn't THAT introverted. "How would you boys like some supper?" Her former expression sliding back onto her face, that warmth that Sam could only describe as his mom.

"Yeah," Sam looked eagerly at Dean, "Can you eat dinner over here?"

Dean nodded at the invite, ducking his head, slightly uncomfortable at the woman's gaze. "Yeah, I didn't have any plans for supper, anyway." he said with a shrug. He followed Sam into the house, hands in his pockets, as he wasn't trusting himself too much at the moment. Dean knew that if he didn't do something with his hands he might just reach out and start touching Sam again, and he wasn't quite sure how the boy's mother would  
take that.

He grinned, looking around the living room, noticing photos of Sam proudly displayed all over the room. "You have a nice house," he said to Mary, before turning to look at Sam. He knew that Sam could see the nervousness in his eyes as their eyes met once more. Dean swallowed hard, trying not to just kiss Sam again then and there.

"Um, so, I'm Dean. I go to school with Sam. It's kinda funny, I live just four houses away from here. Um, yeah, so..." Dean trailed off, feeling like an idiot.

Sam gave Dean a reassuring smile and nudged him with his elbow, hoping that he'd catch the hint to relax. There were a couple times that Sam thought Dean might just pull him in for a kiss, but he never did. That was probably for the best. Not that this mom would care about him kissing a boy, but more like his mom would care about him kissing someone he just met.

"I'm glad that Sammy made a friend," Sam's mom smiled before stirring the kettle on the stove.

"Mom," Sam whined, "my name's Sam."

"Right," she grinned--and Sam knew she only said Sammy to make him squirm, "Well, don't be rude," she gestured, "show him around the house."

Sam rolled his eyes at his mom, but walked out of the room. He showed Dean the living room and the bathroom and where his mom's room was and where his room was, all the while attempting to maneuver around unpacked boxes. They'd only been living in the house for a few weeks, so there was still some stuff left to unpack. Sam cautiously reached out for Dean's hand, letting their fingers brush for a couple seconds before intertwining them. 

"Food’s almost done, but we could hang out in my room for awhile if you want or we could watch TV or something," Sam shook his bangs from his face.

Dean grinned at Sam, before leaning in to kiss him. There was something so distracting about Sam's mouth, something that made Dean want to spend all his time kissing him. "Hanging out would be great, unless you want me to help you unpack some stuff, we could do that." Dean was grinning, thinking that if he helped Sam with his boxes there would be a completely valid reason for the two of them to be sealed away in Sam's room.

"God, Sammy, the things you make me feel," Dean whispered, against Sam's lips, hands running up Sam's back under the fabric of his t-shirt.

Dean realized that things were starting to spiral out of control again, but couldn't help the happy smile that came to his face when Sam pushed him against the bed.

Sam hummed happily into the kiss, hands sliding under Dean's shirt. He knew that they only had 15 minutes tops, but he'd much rather spend those 15 minutes kissing Dean than unpacking, "I think," kiss on the lips, "that," kiss on the jaw, "unpacking," kiss on the neck, "can wait." Sam nipped at the sensitive flesh on Dean's throat when he swallowed. He nuzzled his head into Dean's shoulder when Dean arched up against him. The contact too teasing and he was already too needy form before.

Two could play at that game. Sure, Sam was inexperienced, but it wasn't like he was uneducated. He lifted Dean's shirt up and kissed his way up the trail of hair leading to his navel. Tongue darting out every couple seconds, Sam continued kissing Dean's torso before swiping his tongue over one nipple. He could feel Dean's breath get faster and that was all the invitation that Sam needed to suck and nibble on the sensitive nub.

Dean snaked his fingers into Sam's hair, biting his lip to prevent himself from making too much noise. He looked down at Sam, heart pounding in his chest as Sam assaulted his chest in the best way possible. He knew he was whimpering, but couldn't be brought to care. The feelings that Sam was drawing from him were amazing, Dean didn't think he had ever been as hard as he was in that moment.

Dean arched into Sam, wrapping one long leg around Sam's hip, pinning the younger boy to his body, "Sam, god, Sammy, you're perfect. Please, oh god, Sam, want you, want you so much." He yanked lightly on the back of Sam's head, pulling him up to kiss him again. Dean's arms wrapped tightly around Sam's back, trapping Sam against his chest.

The change in angle dragged their groins together, Dean hissing into the kiss as the sensations it caused made him tremble. "Don't ever want to lose you, Sammy. The things you do to me."

Dean knew that he should be thinking things over, that he shouldn’t be falling this hard and this fast for the other boy, but he'd be a damn liar if he said he wasn't already a little bit in love with Sam. There was just something, something that made Dean feel whole, like he wasn't alone. Dean never wanted to give that up.

His hand ran down Sam's back, coming to rest on the boy's ass, and he gripped the tight cheek under his palm, arching into Sam.

"Dean," Sam whimpered when their hips lined up. Everything that Dean was saying was just making it even more intense. Every sensation somehow exploding with Dean's words. God, he wanted Dean too and he simply didn't know why. He didn't know what it was or why he trusted him so much. His voice even threatened to say 'I love you' but that seemed a little bit overboard and he didn't want to scare Dean away. Right now, he'd do  
anything to make sure that Dean didn't ever want to leave him. They weren't even in a relationship yet and Sam was already thinking about how hard it would be when Dean left him.

He thrusted against the older boy, moaning into his mouth. His hand explored it's way down Dean's stomach, having to push just to wedge between their two bodies. Sam palmed at Dean, feeling how hard he was. He held his breath to keep away a moan. Now he was grinding against Dean and his own hand. At this rate, e was going to have to change jeans before he ate dinner.

"Dean, Dean," Sam buried his face into Dean's chest, "Please," There wasn't a specific thing that Sam was even asking for, he just needed something. Anything. He was so close that it hurt and he was praying that his mom wouldn't interrupt for at least a couple more minutes.

When had things gotten so out of hand? Probably when Dean first saw Sam in the lunchroom that afternoon. Dean couldn't understand why he was feeling the way he did, but he loved it. He groaned when Sam placed his hand between them, he extra contact being almost enough to send him over the edge. Dean kissed at Sam's neck, knowing that there was going to be a mark there, but he couldn't be brought to care.

Dean moved the hand that was on Sam's ass to the waistband of Sam's jeans. He slid it under the denim and cotton of Sam's underwear, hand clasping onto the firm flesh underneath. "Mine, my Sammy, my pretty Sam. Gonna make me come, Baby. Never gonna let you go, gonna keep you forever, Baby."

He looked up, staring into Sam's eyes, whispering, "Tell me I can keep you, Sam. Tell me you're mine. God, please be mine."

Sam's mind flooded with emotions and everything else. This was all going so fast, but he honestly couldn't remember how he'd managed without Dean. When Dean's hand wrapped around his cock, Sam had to bite Dean's shoulder just to keep from moaning so loudly the entire town would be aware of what was happening here. Dean just kept saying things like 'mine' and 'baby' and did he just say forever? Sam started palming at Dean faster and thrusting into Dean's hand harder. He needed this so bad. It felt like his entire world had been completely reduced down to one big puddle of nothing but need. He wasn't even sure how they'd gotten to this point, but he knew that he never wanted them to stop.

"Mmm Dean," Sam whimpered as softly as he could, "I'm yours, I'm yours, I-I-I'm gonna--" Sam voice strained to work at the end, just a little more. 

Dean groaned, his orgasm hitting him hard when Sam told him that he was Dean's. Dean had never wanted something, never wanted someone so much as he wanted Sam. He bit down on Sam's shoulder, trying to muffle his screams of pleasure as his cock let out stream after stream of hot cum in his pants. He knew he was going to be a mess, but really couldn't care less, it was Sam who did this to him, Sam who made him fall apart so quickly.

"Mine, god, Sam, you're mine, never gonna leave you, Sammy. I need you," each word said between kisses against Sam's neck. He was trembling, his hand quickening on Sam's flesh, "Love you, want you to cum for me, need you so much. You have no clue what you do to me, do you, Baby?" It hit Dean hard, what he had said, realizing that he had meant it when he told Sam he loved him. It was kinda scary, feeling so much so quickly, but Dean knew it was the truth.

Dean could tell Sam was close, and did everything in his power to make Sam go over the edge himself.

Sam's body jerked when his orgasm hit him. He just kept mumbling out Dean's name over and over again, trying his best to keep it down. His hips thrusted half-heartedly as he came down from his high. Sam kissed at the spot he had bitten Dean a little too roughly. His breathing was ragged, but it made him happy to hear that Dean's was too. Nothing like this had ever happened to him before and it was all a lot to take in, but damn, it felt  
so good to be pressed up against Dean. Against Dean who said that he...

Dean had said that he loved Sam. It was probably just some heat of the moment thing. No way that he actually meant it. Except that Sam wanted him to mean it. Which was even more insane. How could Sam genuinely feel like he was in love with Dean? He totally didn't know him. But it felt like he did. It felt like they were somehow connected.

"Dean, I lo--" Sam was cut off.

"Boys! Dinner!" his mom shouted--and thank God she didn't come check on them.

"I guess we should, um, get cleaned up," Sam rolled off of Dean and awkwardly stood up from the bed.

Dean groaned, a pout on his face as Sam left him. He already missed the feel of Sam's body pressed against his, addicted to the younger boy. "Hey, Sam, look at me," he whispered, cupping Sam's face in his hand. "I meant what I said. God, I know I shouldn't, we just met for fucks sake, but I do. I do love you, I feel like I've always loved you."

He kissed Sam gently, but even that small gesture was enough to have his cock giving an interested twitch. "Hmm, I don't have anything to change into," Dean said, biting his lip as he watched Sam change his underwear and jeans. 'Shit' he thought, 'he's gonna be the death of me.'

Dean's eyes never left Sam's body, wanting nothing more than to be able to map every inch of the younger teens skin, to leave hickeys and small little bite marks all over him, marking him as Dean's.

Sam could feel those green eyes staring him down as he changed. "I'll try and find you something," Sam added, purposely not looking at Dean because he was worried he'd end up needing to change again if he actually took a moment to look at him. e fumbled around through his boxes until he found a pair of jeans that his mom had said, "Sam, you're going to start growing soon and you know we don't have time to shop. They'll come in handy," to which Sam had made a face at her, "Don't look at me like that." He could still remember the way she had chuckled at him that night

"Here," Sam handed over the jeans. When their fingers brushed his heart started racing again, "And Dean, I," he failed at his attempt not to watch the other boy, "I think I love you too..." Sam felt scared, he had never really said that to anyone other than his mom before.

"Sam! Dinner!" his mother announced again.

"We're coming Mom!" Sam shouted back.

Dean walked out of his room first, but Sam grabbed his wrist, tugging him back in. Sam kissed him, moving his hand up to cradle Dean's perfect jaw. "I feel like I've always loved you too Dean," Sam bit his lower lip nervously. He cleared his throat, "Well, dinner's waiting and you don't want to make my mom wait too long for anything." Sam grinned and lead the way back to the kitchen.


	2. Falls Apart

5 months later

Dean stormed out of his house, holding his jacket in one hand and his keys in the other. "I don't care what you think you drunk asshole, this is my life, not yours and if I want to quit playing sports there is nothing you can do about it," e yelled over his shoulder at his father as he made his way down the sidewalk towards his boyfriend's house.

John followed him, "Dean, you get your ass home, now."

"Leave me alone, you ass," Dean yelled, running up onto the porch, ringing the doorbell and knocking hard on the door, praying that Sam was home. "Just go away."

The door opened, revealing Mary, who took in Dean's tear stained face, motioning the teen into her house, she looked back as she was about to close the door, her jaw dropping at the man standing on her steps.

"Mary?" John asked in shock, trying to understand why his son had never told him that he had found his mother.

Sam heard the yelling even from his house. You could always hear the yelling. Normally, Dean would come storming over to his house and Sam would try and make him feel better. Sometimes he made him feel better. Sometimes he didn't. To be fair, Dean's dad was a jerk. Sometimes, the things that man would do to Dean make Sam's blood boil. He watched his mom go to the door and saw Dean walk into the house. Immediately Sam was on his feet and hugging Dean. He supposed that he could kiss him, since his mom knew about them, but it felt kind of awkward to do that.

"Mary?" he heard John's voice. Why would John even know his mom's name. He guessed that Dean could've told him, but he doubted that considering the shocked tone in John's voice.

"John," his mom's hand went to her mouth and Sam went to her side. John was fooling himself if he thought that Sam would let anything happen to his mom or his Dean.

"But you..." John blinked several times as if trying to figure our if he was imagining all this or not, "Dean's friend is," John's mouth was slack.

"Sam's friend is my," Mary mumbled, "I knew it. I could feel it."

Both Dean and Sam stared at the interaction with confused faces. Crying, his mom ran back to her room. Sam quickly followed, but she had locked her door. He didn't know what was going on.

Dean glared at his father, "Get out of here, Dad." The look on his face told John that Dean wasn't in the mood to put up with any of his crap right now.

Dean was actually surprised when John nodded, "Please, just, ask her to call me, okay, Dean. I need, I need to talk with Mary."

Dean was angry, but confused at the broken, hurt expression on his father's face. He couldn't remember ever seeing the man looking so lost, like everything in his world had been taken away from him. He went to look for Sam, finding his boyfriend sitting on the floor against his mother's  
bedroom door. They could both hear Mary sobbing in the bedroom, and Dean knew whatever was going on was hurting Sam. He kinda hated his father even more for this, because Mary had never been anything but good to him, had never questioned his relationship with her son, had made him feel like he was a good person.

She had made Dean feel that he could do anything, and was a big part of the reason he had quit playing sports. He remembered the conversation they had had when he had decided to quit, she could tell he was miserable and had asked him why he did things that made him unhappy. When he had told her that it was what his father had wanted, she had told him that while one should love and respect their elders, one shouldn't let their parents make them do anything they didn't want to.

"Mary, he's gone," Dean said loud enough for her to hear him, holding Sam against his chest and kissing away the tears that had started to fall down his boyfriend's face. "He asked, asked me to have you call him. Um, you have my house number if you want to call him, but... but you don't have to do anything that makes you unhappy. You taught me that."

Sam heard the front door close and watched Dean walk over to him. He heard his mom's crying begin to slow when Dean spoke to her. Dean crouched down to Sam's level before pulling him in and kissing away tears. Sam fisted his hands into the jacket Dean had one and pulled them closer. They say like that for a while before they heard his mom walking towards the door. Both  
of them jerked up into standing positions, waiting for his mom to say something. 

"Thank you Dean," she put a hand to his cheek and brushed her thumb softly against Dean's skin. "Oh Sammy," she pulled Sam in for a hug, and he didn't dare question the nickname. 

He hugged his mom as tight as he could, willing her pain away if that was possible.

Sam and Dean sat in the living room and Sam could hear his mother pacing the kitchen speaking in hushed tones on the phone. It made him nervous. It made him wonder what was happening. It made him wonder if he was going to have to move or something like that. Sam jumped a little when Dean's hand grabbed his, but he relaxed into the touch.

"Dean I'm worried," Sam rested his head on the boy's shoulder as Dean rubbed little circles on Sam's hand with his thumb.

"Dean I'm worried," god how those words tore at Dean's soul. He clasped Sam's hand tighter, pulling the younger boy against him.

He whispered into Sam's ear, "Not gonna lose you, Sam. I can't. I love you too much, whatever happens, I'm gonna stay with you, no matter what. Your mom decides to move away from here, I'm gonna follow you. You know I will." He cupped Sam's face in his hands, looking him dead in the eyes, trying to will Sam into his mind, to let him know that Dean wasn't going anywhere, not ever.

He pulled at Sam gently, positioning Sam so he was practically straddling Dean's lap as he whispered reassurances into Sam's ear. Dean knew he really shouldn't do this, but he needed to show Sam that nothing was going to separate them. He leaned in, kissing Sam softly, it wasn't one of their hungry, need you naked now, kisses but one that spoke of love and devotion.  
Dean was so lost in the kiss he never heard Mary walk out of the kitchen, but heard her gasp when she saw them.

Sam wanted to cry at Dean's words, because he'd never had someone who loved him like this. They'd been together for a few months, but it felt like a few years and a few seconds all at the same time. He let Dean guide him onto his lap, putting up no resistance.

When Dean kissed him, it took his breath away. Normally, they were all hands, lips, teeth, and tongue when they kissed. But not this time. No, this time was soft and gentle. It was like Dean was taking care of him, and that about made him whimper. He was always trying to take care of Dean, but it was times like these, that Sam realized Dean was fully capable of returning the favor. Their kiss broke when he heard his mother gasp quite loudly.

"Sorry mom," Sam apologized, "I didn't hear you coming."

"No it's just," his mom still had a lingering look of horror on her face, "Boys it's...we need to talk."

Sam's eyebrows furrowed together. He knew that the situation wasn't good, but he hadn't seen that look in his mother's eyes since the last time a Wendigo almost got him-- nd did put a pretty decent sized scar on his shoulder.

"We need to talk" those four words circled around Dean's head over and over again. He knew that those four words were never the start of a pleasant conversation.

Dean grabbed Sam's hand, interlacing their fingers, hand shaking. He couldn't lose Sam, wouldn't lose him. Sam was his everything, the reason he got up most mornings nowadays, and nothing could make him stop feeling that way. There was a knock at the door, and Dean and Sam both watched as Mary went and let John in.

"It'll be okay, Sammy. Everything is gonna be okay as long as you and I are together," Dean whispered into Sam's ear. He could feel Sam nod against him and turned to face Mary and his father. Both adults had shocked looks on their faces, and John looked as if he had been crying. The last time Dean remembered his father crying was when he was really little, when his  
mother just up and disappeared one day.  
Dean held onto Sam's hand for dear life, "So, what do we need to talk about?"

All four of them were sitting around the table, Sam and Dean's handle still laced together out of sight. Sam kept looking back and forth between John and his mom, waiting for one of them to say something, but they both just looked lost for words. He kept repeating Dean's words in his head, 'as long as we're together, as long as we're together' a little mantra to keep him from having a panic attack over how long it was taking for someone to say something.

"Sam, I haven't been completely honest with you," his mom started, a guilty tone in her voice, "Your dad didn't leave us, I left your dad. And.." she started tearing up.

"And Dean, you know that your mom left a long time ago," John sighed, "but I never mentioned that you had a sibling, because I didn’t know."

Sam was listening, but not comprehending. It sounded like they were hinting that Dean and Sam were brothers, but that was impossible. Dean and Sam weren't brothers. They couldn't be brothers. That didn't make any sense. He felt Dean's grip on his hand loosen. No, no, no, they couldn't be brothers. Dean had said as long as they were together. Sam couldn't lose Dean. They  
weren't brothers. No. Right?

Dean noticed Sam starting to look like he was panicking the second his grip on his hand lessened. 'Shit,' he thought, having started to let go of Sam's hand assuming that the younger boy wouldn't have wanted him touching him like that anymore. He squeezed Sam's hand tightly, pulling it to rest on his knee, rubbing his thumb across the heel of it. That little motion was their special signal that everything was alright, that nothing was going to get in their way.

"I need, I need to talk to Sam alone," Dean said, standing from the table, dragging Sam out of the room and up to his bedroom. He locked the door behind them. "I don't care what they think, Sammy. I love you, always gonna love you. I'm not losing you, not now not ever. Do you hear me. The only way this is over between us is if you walk away from it, I sure as hell know I can't. You're my everything."

Sam felt like he was lost. And just like his first day of school, it was Dean who pulled him away from that feeling. He could hear the words that Dean was saying, but his brain couldn't comprehend them. Everything was too much. It all felt like it was too much.

"Dean," Sam tried to think of something to say, "How're we? I, I didn't even know." Sam felt so stupid, but the tears were already falling before he could try and stop them. "Dean, I had no idea, this whole time," he was sobbing and grabbing at Dean, because fuck, he just needed something to hold onto. His entire world was being ripped out from beneath him. Granted, Dean and Sam hadn't had sex yet, but they were certainly hands on in their relationship. Sam didn't know what he was doing. He hadn't known that Dean was his brother. He hadn't known that he had a brother period. There was no reason for him to think that being with Dean was wrong. It had always felt  
so effortless and simple. Even when they fought, it never felt like it was over. Now, the whole relationship was screaming that it had been wrong and repulsive.

"I can't," Sam tried to just crawl into Dean, maybe in there everything would be safe and warm, "I don't know what." He sobbed, "What do we do Dean?" Sam's fingers slid into Dean's short hair, thinking that maybe he wasn't supposed to be doing that either. Maybe he wasn't supposed to be hugging Dean. Or touching him at all. However, right now he couldn't handle those thoughts.

Dean licked his lips nervously, deep in thought, "I wish... I wish we could just take off together. Get away from everything, from them. You're the only thing, only person I need. I don't give a damn about what they said, Sammy. You're mine, mine to love, mine to be with. I'm never gonna  
want to be with anyone else. And yeah, they might, they might think this is wrong, that we're wrong. But damnit, I love you, I love you with everything I am."

Dean had fallen to his knees, tears streaming down his cheeks. He couldn't lose Sam, not now. Sam meant too much to him. 

Sam felt his legs give out when Dean dropped down to the floor. Normally, Dean wasn’t quite this vulnerable. It was always Sam who needed to talk about his feelings and Dean who was determined that if you tried hard enough, you could beat something until your feelings were gone. Sam's hands gripped Dean's face, feeling an evening's worth of stubble there.

"You're the only thing that matters Dean," Sam pulled him in to kiss him. Sam moved his way closer to his boyfriend--to his brother? Their knees bumped where they were pressed against the floor. Sam just kept kissing him. Hoping that he could just kiss all of this away. Hoping that if they never pulled apart, then none of this was real. Because it wasn't real. No. Not to Sam. The only thing that was real was his relationship with Dean. Nothing else existed. He'd run away with Dean if that's what Dean asked of him. He'd miss his mom, but if that's what Dean asked, Sam couldn't deny him of that. Sam couldn't deny Dean of anything.

Sam finally remembered that his mom and Dean's dad--their parents?--were still in the house, waiting for them to talk some things through. He wondered how he was supposed to face them again. He'd felt so lied to and betrayed and confused. If they were going to say that he couldn't have Dean anymore, then that was it. He'd leave. Nothing was worth losing Dean. It had taken him this long to find Dean, and he sure as Hell wasn't going to let go now.

Dean knew he needed to be strong, needed to keep it together, but he felt as if his world was being torn apart. The only reason he was holding on as well as he was was for Sam. His Sam, his boyfriend, his brother? Sam was all that mattered to him. Dean knew he shouldn't want to be with Sam, they were brothers, but how could he stop loving the other boy as much as he did, it would be like ripping his heart out, a wound that he would never be able to recover from.

"Sammy, if we were older..." Dean whispered against Sam's hair, "if we were older, I'd just say let's run away together. I can't, no I won't lose you, Sam. You're everything to me. I can't breathe without you. I don't want to go on if I can't be with you. It scares me, it's always scared me how much I need you. But it's good scary, you know. We'll, we'll figure out something. I can't ask you to leave with me, I won't do that to Mary. She's," he laughed bitterly, "she's the closest thing I ever had to a mother, you know. I had always pictured us older, getting married, having  
her as my mother-in-law, making her what she already felt like. Family."

He kissed Sam, it was a kiss of someone so lost and broken, a kiss of someone trying to figure out what to do. Dean clung to Sam, not wanting to let him go, in fear of Sam slipping away from him. 

There was a knock at the door, and Dean laughed brokenly, clinging to Sam for dear life, "Please, don't leave me, I need you, Sammy. No matter what they say, I'm never going to leave you, you're my everything."

Sam stared into desperate eyes. He'd never seen that look in Dean's eyes--that look of true, genuine fear. It suddenly made Dean seem more his age instead of older. It made him seem like a human instead of a hero. Sam glanced back and forth between the two beautifully green eyes, trying to figure out what exactly he could say. Someone knocked on the door, but he wouldn't have even noticed it if Dean hadn't glanced over to where to sound came from.

"Dean I can't leave you," he pressed their foreheads together, just aching to be able to feel Dean's breath, just to know that Dean was still breathing, "I can't just," he took a deep breath when another knock hit the door, "I can't let go of what we have." Sam kissed him chastely.

When Sam opened the door, John and Mary were both standing there--standing about two feet apart, but still standing there. Sam wondered what had went wrong between them. He wondered what would've happened if his mom hadn't left. Would there still be this thing between Dean and him?

Dean and Sam followed John and Mary back into the kitchen, Dean reaching out to link his hand with Sam's under the table when they were seated. 

Mary looked at the boys, she knew what she had seen earlier before John had shown back up, and had refrained from telling him about the boys. She wasn't really sure exactly what was going on between them, though a part of her knew whatever it was it was intense and real. She should have seen the looks they shared for what they were, but had ignored it, thinking that they were just good friends. But when she had seen them kissing, that desperate kiss, like they were drowning without each other, she knew deep down that trying to separate the boys would end up destroying them. 

Mary saw how they watched each other, heard how they talked to each other, about each other, and remembered when she was young herself, she remembered how it felt when she would look at John, god it still felt that way, even after 14 years of being apart. But seeing the boys, her boys, her sons so intertwined, it broke her heart, she wondered if she was wrong for leaving how she had, wrong for trying to protect her family by deserting it. 

Sam could feel his mother's watchful eye. She always had a way of knowing what was going on. He hadn't straight up told her about his relationship with Dean, but he had hinted pretty, really, super heavily and he figured she knew. Hell, he figured she knew from the moment he brought Dean into the house that first day. But now? He couldn't imagine how she felt. He wondered if she blamed him or Dean, but figured that she didn't. His mom wasn't like that. She never blamed anyone but herself--which is why Sam thought they ran away so much.

John kept stealing glances over at Mary, and it made Sam tense up. He knew what kind of father John had been to Dean and he could only imagine why his mom had left. Although, he didn't understand why she couldn't have taken Dean too. Why hadn't she taken him? Did she not love him? How could someone NOT love Dean? Part of Sam wanted to blame his mother for everything, but the other part of him saw the frightened gleam in her eyes and couldn't blame her for a damn thing. 

Dean's hand was still holding his, so he thought that was a good sign at least.

"So uh," John's voice was gravelly--Sam wondered if maybe Dean's would be like that someday, "do either of you have something you, uh, want to say?"

There were a thousand things that Sam wanted to say, but now that he was asked, they had all faded. He glanced over at Dean. Dean was always better with words, or at least was always a better charmer.

Dean looked over at Sam for confirmation, biting his lip. When Sam nodded, Dean let out a breath. He swallowed nervously, "Sam and I are... we're together. Have been for a while now. He's everything, Dad. Every-fucking-thing. I can't give him up. I'm not going to. I don't care what either of you think or say about it," he gave both Mary and John a look that told them he wasn't screwing around here. "You tell me that Sam and I can't be together, it's the last thing you'll ever say to me, because you do that, you do that to me, to him, I'm gone, and I'm taking Sam with me."

Dean looked at Mary, really looked hard at her, realizing how much he actually looked like his mother, "She's why I was never good enough, isn't she, Dad? I was never good enough because I look like my mother?" He turned his attention to Mary, "And you, you have a lot of explaining to do. Explaining why you abandoned us, why you've forced Sam to move again and again and again. Why you made him not have a normal life." 

Dean knew he was starting to get overworked and sat down, grabbing onto Sam's hand for grounding. He leaned over resting his forehead on Sam's shoulder, "I just want answers."

Sam almost could believe that Dean had just went out and said it. At the same time, it gave Sam butterflies to hear Dean say that they were together. It sounded so real and official. Dean said that he wouldn't give Sam up and gosh, Sam could just kiss him right there on the mouth in front of their parents. But he didn't. That wouldn't have really helped the situation.

He listened as Dean went off a little, pent up anger from years of this family confusion all suddenly out in the open. Sam squeezed onto Dean's hand, letting him know that everything would be okay.

The moment Dean's head hit Sam's shoulder, Sam just felt relieved. Everything was out in the open. Well, as far as Sam and Dean's relationship went.

"Mom," Sam almost whispered, "I-I want answers too," his voice got a little more confident. "Why'd you leave John and Dean?" Sam thought for a moment and it sunk in when he caught his mom's eyes. "Hunting. That's what it was about wasn’t it?" This was all some weird protection scheme that Sam had been left out of.

Mary sighed, knowing she was receiving odd looks from both Dean and John. She nodded, "Yes. It was, I did it to protect you, to protect all of you. There was something, from my past that was going to destroy us all. I had to leave, had to protect my family, even if it meant protecting them from me. I was only a few months pregnant with you, Sam. Your father didn't know, didn't know that we were going to have another child."

She looked down at her hands, "There is so much that your father and brother don't know, so much I tried protecting them from."

Dean glared at her, "So you could protect me, but you couldn't protect Sam? I've seen the scars, I know he'd tell me where they came from if I asked, but I always thought that if he wanted to tell me he would. Do you know how much it breaks my heart seeing them, but you know what, it also makes me damn proud, proud because of how strong he is, he's better than I'll ever be. You may have had your reasons, but you know what, we need answers. You protected Sam for years, it's my job now, my job do. I. Make. Myself. Clear?"

John looked between the three of them, and started laughing. Dean glared at his father, so did Mary. "He sounds like you when you have your mind set on something, you know that, Mary? He's always been so much like you."

When Dean mentioned his scars, Sam flinched a little. He always wondered if Dean thought they were ugly or if Dean had made his own assumptions as to how they got there. It wasn't like Sam could just openly say that he got this scar from a vengeful spirit and this one from a vampire. But then Dean surprised him --like he frequently did--and said that Sam was strong. Dean thought that too tall, lanky, whiney Sam was strong. Sam's eyes were wide while he watched Dean speak.

When John laughed, it shook Sam out of his focus. He was almost angry until John made a comparison between Dean and his mom. Something about that warmed his heart.

"Mom," Sam spoke up, "why'd you have to stay in the life? Why couldn't you have left it behind?"

He saw the questioning look on Dean's face. He had never explained anything about monsters to Dean. After all, most of the time Sam was trying to impress his boyfriend, not scare him away. Oddly enough, he saw a similar questioning look on John's face. Family resemblance was obvious he supposed.

Mary sighed, looking down at her hands once more. "Sam, I tried leaving, I left it all behind me for almost a decade, but then, then everything fell apart and my family was in danger. I couldn't stay out, not after, not after having to walk away from the love of my life and my little boy. I know you will never understand why I did what I did, but I did it to save you. To save all of you."

She stood, walking over to the counter to grab herself a cup of coffee, "I was shown what would have happened had I stayed. I would have died, your father would have started hunting, in a quest for vengeance against the demon who would have taken me from him. He would have dragged you with him, raised you as hunters, as warriors. And in the end, he would have ended up in Hell, selling his soul to save your brother. The demon that would have killed me, taken your father, one of his minions would have killed you, Sammy. And your brother, your brother would have made a deal to bring you back, a deal that would have brought about the Apocalypse, well not the deal itself, but what would have happened in Hell."

"I couldn't let John, and Dean, and you, Sammy, in the end all end up in Hell. So I left. I've done the best I could, but I couldn't just sit around and do nothing."

Dean knew he wasn't the only one staring at her, there was a lot of what she had been saying that he just didn't understand, but he could tell she was speaking from the heart. She had done what she felt she needed to to save her family, to save the world. He grabbed Sam's hand, knowing without a doubt that he would sell his soul for Sam, Sam was his everything.

"What was the man's name?" Dean asked, looking into Mary's eyes, eyes that looked so much like his own. How had he not seen that before?

"His name was Castiel."

Sam was trying to process things as his mother spoke. As much as he wanted to be angry with her for lying, he understood. The future that she spoke of seemed plausible. It seemed almost real; like if he thought hard he could remember those things.

Dean's hand was still holding his, and it shook him back to reality. Even he was confused at this point. All the hunting and stuff were things that Sam understood. But this whole future talk and then the mention of someone (or something perhaps) named Castiel. He knew that his mom was telling the truth though, he could see it in her eyes--which oddly reminded him of Dean's now that he was thinking about it.

"I'm sorry Mom," Sam stared at the woman who had saved his life a million times over, "I'm sorry that things had to be like that."

"I'm sorry too," she looked at him softly.

Dean cleared his throat, "So this guy just shows up and tells you what's gonna happen and you believe him?"

Mary shook her head, tears falling down her face, "He showed me, showed me how the world would be if I, if I stayed. Told me that he shouldn't be showing me any of this, that he'd be punished for it, but he did it because his friends showed him what it meant to have free will, showed him that you have to take a stand and think for yourself, question orders if they sound wrong."

John reached over, hesitantly placing his hand on Mary's shoulder. She turned to him, throwing her arms around his neck, sobbing against him. "Let me talk to her in private, boys. There's a lot your mother and I need to discuss."

Dean nodded, standing up from the table and slowly walking out of the room. He was silent as he walked into Sam's room, flopping back against the pillows, pulling the younger boy against his chest. "Tell me about what you do, tell me about hunting, Sam. Help me understand everything. If this is your life, it's my life too. You and me, forever, remember. I need to know things if I'm gonna be able to protect you, to help you. Love you too much to let you face everything alone." His hands traced over the scars on Sam's shoulder through the fabric of his shirt, the same scars he worshiped with touches and kisses on an almost daily basis. "Tell me your stories, where you got your scars. They make you who you are, and I, I want to know everything."

Everything was such a big request. Where was Sam supposed to begin? Sam had been hunting his whole life and he still got a few curveballs now and then. "Dean, I don't know where to begin," he thought, "I guess I should tell you that all those monsters you used to have nightmares about? Yeah. They're really. Really real."

Sam waited for Dean to flip--like a normal person should--but he just stared intently, waiting. "Hunting, well, being a hunter means that you go and kill those monsters." Sam laid down beside Dean. "Its complicated sometimes, but somebody has to do it you know?"

When Sam looked over at Dean he noticed the boy was tracing over familiar scars. It made Sam feel insecure. Dean always made them out like they were part of Sam and he loved all his parts, but Sam didn't see them that they. They were reminders of the hunts that he didn't do well on. They were reminders of the times he almost died. They were reminders that he wasn't like everyone else.

And Sam hated that.

Dean looked at Sam, knowing the other teen hated his scars. Dean loved them, loved how they made Sam seem even more perfect to him. He grinned at Sam,knowing he really shouldn't be doing this, not with their parents downstairs, but he couldn't help himself. He leaned down, shoving Sam's shirt up his chest, kissing and licking at the boy's scars. "You're beautiful," kiss "perfect" kiss, lick "sexy" nuzzle, lick, kiss "all mine. My perfect, gorgeous boyfriend. You have no clue what you do to me. You see these scars as imperfections, I see them as badges of honor. Proof that you are better than me in every way, proof that I will never be as smart, or sexy, or awesome as you. And you know what, you know the thing that drives me the wildest?"

Dean watched as Sam shook his head, "You act like I'm something special. You treat me like everything I say or do is complete and utter perfection. How the hell did I get so lucky to find you, Sammy?" He kissed Sam on the lips, tongue sneaking past Sam's lips to taste the younger boys mouth. "What did I do to deserve someone as amazing as you?"

He nuzzled Sam's neck, a small thrill going through him that they could be caught at any moment, groaning when Sam unbuttoned his shirt, shoving the fabric down Dean's shoulders.

"You're so perfect Dean," Sam pulled the shirt off of Dean's shoulders. "Perfect lips" he kissed him, "Perfect eyes," Sam stroked his face, "Perfect nose," he grinned when he gave Dean an Eskimo kiss. "You wanna know what drives me wildest?" He could see the hunger in Dean's eyes and knew that his probably looked the same.

Sam leaned forward and kissed down the side of Dean's neck before swiping his tongue against the top of his shoulder, "Your freckles" he grinned and kissed the freckles that were scattered over Dean's shoulders.

He knew that maybe they shouldn't be doing this. Jesus, they'd just found out that they were brothers for God's sake. They could get caught any second and it made Sam nervous. Then again, when it came to Dean, what didn't make Sam at least a little nervous?

Dean swallowed hard, grinning at Sam's words. "You're the perfect one in my opinion. I guess we're both right then, aren't we?" He kissed Sam again, letting his hands roam over Sam's back under the shirt he wore. "Mmmm, Sammy, take this off. Please?"

As soon as Sam took off the offending garment, Dean grabbed him by the hips, pulling him to straddle Dean's body. His hands rested on Sam's ass, and he arched up into him, drawing sounds of pleasure out of both of them. "Want you so bad, always want you. Wish I could have you, have all of you."

He stared into Sam's eyes, knowing that Sam knew exactly what he was asking. "But, not here. Not right now, not with our parents," Dean had to laugh at that, "just downstairs. Want it to be just you and me."

Dean would have said more, but there was a knock at the door, "Boys, your father and I are, we're going to go away for a little while, go to dinner and talk. We'll be back in a couple hours."

Dean swallowed, it was if someone had answered a prayer he had never even spoken.

Sam could barely breathe because he'd never wanted anything quite this bad and then his parents saying that they were leaving? It was like he hit a bit of luck, which was highly unusual in Sam's case. He grinned down at Dean when he heard a car start up in the driveway, "So are we along enough now?"

Not even waiting for an seer, Sam dipped his head back down for a kiss. He didn't try to fight Dean for dominance, he just enjoyed the feeling of Dean's tongue trailing over every detail of Sam's mouth. Sam let his hands wander, brushing and gripping at Dean's perfect skin. God, he felt like nothing would ever be able to truly capture the beauty that was Dean.

He ground his hips down, a silent plea for something. Dean tipped his head back, breaking the kiss with a moan, and Sam just stared in awe. "How are you so beautiful?" The words slipped out unintentionally. Sam immediately started mentally slapping himself. Who says stuff like that? Why did he always have to speak?

Dean smiled, "God, Baby, you're the beautiful one." He reached between them, opening the fly of Sam's jeans and then doing the same to his own. "Want those off," he said in a husky tone, tilting his hips up to shove the material off of his hips and down his legs far enough that he could kick them off. He yanked at Sam's pants, shoving them and his underwear down, leaving the younger boy naked.

"God, what you do to me, Sam. Can you see how much I want you?" he asked, hand gently stroking himself, enjoying the look of pure want and ownership Sam was throwing at him. He chuckled when Sam shoved his hand away, letting Dean know in no uncertain terms that that belonged to Sam.

Sam's whole body was trembling with need as he watched Dean stroke himself. He swatted the hand away only to replace it with his own. His hand moved teasingly slow, squeezing and lingering over the most sensitive spots. He relished in the little noises he was drawing from Dean. His own cock was feeling horribly unattended to, so he stroked it once just to take the edge off. Right now, his focus was on Dean.

His hand free hand grazed over Dean's thighs, hipbones, and stomach. He couldn't grasp how something this perfectly created was right there in his grasp. He pulled Dean down for another kiss, this time a little more pleading and rough.

"Dean, I just want to make you feel good," he said between grazes of lips, "I just love you so much." He stroked faster on Dean's hard cock. He felt ready tonight.

He wanted Dean to be his first.

He wanted Dean to be his last.

"Mmm, God, Sammy, you keep that up and I'm not gonna last long," Dean moaned, arching into Sam's touches. He saw the love and devotion in Sam's eyes, knowing it was mirrored in his own. "God, Baby, I love you so much. Never want, never want anyone else."

Dean's hands ran along Sam's chest, tweaking at his peaked nipples. He smiled at the sounds that fell from Sam's mouth at the action. "I want, God, Sammy, I want you so much, want to be in you. Can I? Can I have you like that, Baby Boy? Wanna be your first, wanna make it so good for you."

Sam's flesh pebbled beneath Dean's touch and he arched into Dean's movements. He slowed his hands, trying to refrain from that need to see Dean's face in pure pleasure. Dean's eyes were desperate and hungry, but loving. Sam had never felt anything like this, Dean's words alone were making it impossible for him to keep out little throaty noises.

He gasped when Dean's fingers brushed over his nipples. Dean went back and did it again, and then pulled a little. Holy Hell, Sam could've came just from that--something that wasn't so awesome about his age. His breath caught in his throat because Dean was asking to be his first--as if Sam would want anyone else to be. Sam looked into Dean's eyes, searching for anything that said he didn't really want to do this or anything that said he was only doing this for Sam. He didn't find those things. Dean's eyes were just waiting for an answer and had nothing but love and want in them.

"Dean, I," Sam's heart was pounding, this was going to be it and he was terrified, but happy, and he was nervous, but excited, "I need you," Sam kissed his brother roughly, hoping that he was getting the message that Sam didn't want anything other than Dean at the moment. "Please," he breathed out against Dean's swollen lips.

Dean moaned against Sam's lips, seeing the amount of love and trust in Sam's eyes was almost his undoing. He gently shoved Sam off of him, laying him down against the pillows. "God, Sam, have I, have I told you how much I love you, Baby?" He kissed Sam again, before pulling away. He crawled across the bed, going over to the nightstand. He opened the drawer with shaking hands, pulling out the tube of lube that was hidden inside.

He grinned, remembering when he had bought it, the shocked, aroused look that had come onto Sam's face when he had shown it to him. They hadn't used it yet, but they wanted to be prepared for when they were ready to take this step. Dean knew he had a similar bottle in his own nightstand at home. 

He grinned, showing Sam what he had grabbed, before leaning in to kiss him gently. He opened the tube with trembling hands, then trailed kisses down Sam's chest, paying extra attention to the boy's nipples. He trailed downwards once more, tongue leaving a path down Sam's abs. Dean's tongue dipped into Sam's navel as he gently shoved the younger boy's thighs apart with his hands. "So pretty. And all mine. How'd I get so lucky to get you, Sam? What did I do to earn you in my life?"

Sam couldn't decide whether he should keep his eyes glued onto Dean's movements, or if he should just give in to the need to throw his head back against the bed. He had forgotten about the day Dean had showed him the lube, that mischievous look in his eyes. They hadn't used it yet, but damn, Sam had been eagerly waiting. Dean barely had to touch his legs for them to fall apart. His skin was buzzing with need and his stomach was doing flips consistently. 

"All yours," Sam replied to Dean's ever-flowing string of words. He bucked his hips up instinctively the closer that Dean's mouth got to his cock. Of all the times that they'd fooled around--and there had been quite a few--Sam had never wanted it this bad. Sam ran a hand through Dean's short hair, not pulled or guiding, just touching.

"Dean, please," Sam begged, "I-I need something," he choked out--a little surprised at how desperate his own voice sounded. Was he really that needy? "I love you so much Dean, God, I need you so much." 

Dean placed a kiss just above Sam's cock. As much as he wanted to lick and suck and worship the hard length, he wanted Sam to cum while he was inside of him. He slicked his fingers, trailing kisses along Sam's inner thigh as his fingers circled the tight ring of muscle. "God, Sammy, so perfect," he whispered against the flesh under his lips, smiling as Sam pushed against his probing fingers.

"Gonna take care of you, Baby. Always gonna take care of you," the words were repeated again and again as he teased Sam's entrance. He could tell Sam was getting impatient by the way he was trying to force himself onto Dean's fingers, "Hey, take it easy, Love. Don't wanna hurt you. Want this to be perfect for you. You only have one first time." Dean sighed at those words, a big part of him regretting that Sam wasn't the first person he had been with, but Sam was the only person that had ever gotten to Dean's heart. 

Finally, he entered Sam with one finger, gently probing the younger boy's tight channel, groaning at the sounds coming out of Sam's lips. 

Just as Sam was about to protest loudly against the fact that Dean was totally teasing him, Dean pressed a finger inside. The feeling was almost too much, a slight burn and too many sensations all at once. He moaned and fisted his hand in the sheets when Dean started moving his finger slowly. Sam couldn't tell if it burned more than it felt good or if it felt good more than it burned. Either way, he didn't want Dean to stop.

"Dean!" Sam accidentally shouted when Dean's finger pressed up. And what the fuck was that? His breathing got harder, because nothing had ever felt quite like that. Dean circled his fingertip gently around that spot until Sam was writhing beneath him. Sam wasn't even having coherent thoughts anymore. He didn't know if he wanted to plead for more or if he just wanted to live in this exact moment forever. He didn't have to make the decision though because Dean was already breaching him with another finger.

Sam stuttered out his boyfriend's name, that burning sensation back again, but it was already too late. Sam was already too needy to focus on anything other than Dean stroking against that spot that was making his eyesight blur.

Dean had never seen anything more beautiful than Sam spread beneath him, writhing on the bed. Sam was always the most perfect, beautiful sight he had ever beheld, but seeing him like this, knowing that he was the only person to have ever seen Sam like that, well it was intoxicating. He thrust his fingers in and out of Sam, brushing his prostate as much as possible, scissoring his fingers to stretch the tight ring of muscle. He leaned up to kiss Sam, his fingers never leaving the boy's body as their tongues dueled.

"So perfect, Love. You're doing so good for me, gonna make this perfect." Dean said against Sam's lips, shushing him as Sam whimpered when he removed his fingers. They quickly returned, this time three lube slicked digits entering his body. "That's it, that's my good boy. Wanna get you all nice and ready for me. Never wanna hurt you, want you to love this. Gonna be so good for you." He leaned up a bit more, whispering huskily in Sam's ear, "And later, mmm, later you're gonna be in me. Want you inside me so bad, never wanted anyone like I want you. Never let anyone have me like that."

He could see that Sam was practically vibrating with need, and hoped that he had stretched him enough. Dean couldn't wait any longer, he needed to be inside Sam. He pulled his fingers out, chuckling at the whimper of lose Sam made, before settling between his legs. He groaned when Sam wrapped his legs around Dean's waist, pulling him towards his body. Dean shuddered with want as the tip of his cock brushed against Sam's slick hole. 

Slowly, oh so slowly, so he wouldn't hurt Sam, Dean started to enter his lover. The feeling was unlike anything he had ever felt before, it was like Sam was made just perfectly to fit him. "God, Sammy, you feel, you feel amazing," he moaned. He let out a startled yelp when Sam dug his heels into his ass, shoving Dean all the way inside in one quick motion.

Dean felt so big entering him and Sam moaned just at the idea that Dean was actually inside of him. He was moving so slow and it was only drawing things out. Sam couldn't take it, he wanted all of Dean. With his legs wrapped around Dean, he tightened them to pull Dean all the way in. He heard his lover yelp and returned the noise. Suddenly, he felt so full and stretched and it hurt, but he never wanted it to end. His hands were gripping Dean's forearms and his eyes were shut tight, trying to let his body adjust. Sam's breath was hard and ragged, and his muscles were twitching and shaking a little. 

When he opened his eyes, Dean was staring at him with a concerned look. Sam just smiled and pulled him down for a shaky kiss. He was happy that Dean was letting him adjust, as much as he wanted this, his body was still in shock mode. Dean's tongue licked and slid around in Sam's mouth, encouraging little moans to come from Sam. His muscles began to relax and he could feel his hips aching with the need to move.

"I-I," Sam pulled away from Dean's lips, "Dean, please move, I need more," Sam managed to whimper out. He kissed Dean again chastely to reinforce what he was saying.

"Want more, Baby?" Dean said with a groan. When Sam nodded Dean started thrusting harder into the boy, hands gripping at his hips. He knew that Sam was gonna be sporting bruises, but really could care less. Dean couldn't believe this was finally happening, could barely believe that he was finally inside his beloved Sam. He thrust in hard, pulling back slowly, teasing Sam as he sucked and bit at his neck. 

"Sammy, Sam, god Baby, so good... Never, never gonna give this up," he moaned, muscles straining to hold himself up over Sam. Dean knew he wasn't going to last long, he was too worked up already for that. His thrusts increased in speed, and Dean told Sam how much he wanted him and needed him and loved him on every stroke. His hand moved to grasp Sam's cock, stroking the hard flesh in time to his thrusts. 

"Mmm, that's it, Baby Boy. Feel so good, wanna make you cum for me, wanna see you lose it." He groaned, his thrusts becoming erratic, "Just." a kiss placed on Sam's throat, "for," Dean bit down gently on Sam's earlobe, "ME!" He shook above Sam, his orgasm hitting him hard and fast as he pounded into his lover. "Cum for me, Baby," he panted into Sam's ear as he stroked the boy faster, "wanna feel you cum around me, can you do that for me?"

Sam couldn't get words out, all he could do was moan and gasp and shudder at all the words falling from Dean's lips. He returned every thrust, just trying to absorb Dean. When Dean grasped his cock, it took everything he had not to lose it right then. Sam couldn't cum yet, he needed to see Dean do it first. 

He noticed how Dean's thrusts were slipping out of their rhythm and he could see on Dean's face that he was close. He moaned in encouragement and clenched around his Dean when he knew the boy was coming. Every thrust and stroke was shoving Sam closer and closer to the edge. He couldn't believe all of this was happening. It was all overwhelming and perfect and Sam was in awe of the whole situation. Dean's voice penetrated through his thoughts, begging Sam to cum. 

"Oh God Dean," Sam bit his lip, thusting up into Dean's hand, "Dean, Dean, Deeeaann," His whole world felt like it was flipping upside down. Sam's orgasm making every nerve ending feel like they were getting shocked, his body clenched around Dean--and that just made it so much better. Sam knew that Dean was still inside him, and Sam had never came like this. It had never felt this good and real. Sam was still mumbling out Dean's name through his orgasm, unable to think of any other word.

Eventually, his body eased back into the bed and he could breath again--roughly, but he could breath. 

Dean sighed happily, rolling the two of them so that Sam was laying on top of him. His hands ran down Sam's back. "Was that, was that okay?" he asked. There was a vulnerability in his voice that surprised even himself. He needed it to have been good for Sam, needed it more than anything before. 

"I wish, God, I wish I would have waited to meet you, Sam," he said, looking away slightly. "Wish I had waited for you. I regret that you weren't my first, so damn much. I love you, and I should have waited for you." His hands still trailed up and down Sam's back, holding the younger boy tightly to his body. "Gonna let you have me, Sam. You're gonna be the only one to ever have me like that, I promise you. I need you. Need you more that air. God, I don't think I can live without you. You're... you're my everything."

Dean didn't realize he had started crying, his emotions running rampant as he held and stroked Sam. There was just something about him that brought out that side of Dean.

Sam was snuggled contently against Dean's chest, feeling every breath. His heart was fluttering over what had just happened. He had just lost his virginity to his big brother--which should be sending out all kinds bad signals--but instead he just felt happy. Dean was the only one that he wanted and it made him grin too widely against Dean's skin when he heard Dean saying that Sam was the only one for him. 

But then he felt Dean crying, he could hear it in his voice. Sam's heart tightened, because he didn't want his Dean to cry. Quickly, Sam jerked his head up from Dean's chest and moved a hand up to wipe away tears. "Don't cry Dean," Sam pulled himself closer, "Shhh, don't cry," he kissed him. "Dean it was so perfect, I love you so much." Sam kissed him again. "I'm never gonna leave you," he kissed down Dean's jaw, "You can't ever leave me either okay?" he planted kisses over each and every freckle that he came upon.

"You're my everything too," Sam looked into Dean's eyes, "I wouldn't have wanted anybody else to do that Dean, I never want anybody else to do that," Sam bit his lip.

"God, Sammy, how can, how can I tell you how much you mean to me?" Dean kissed him softly, still completely overwhelmed. "How am I good enough for you? I've never, I've never been good enough for anyone. I'm not a good person, I... there are things, things I shouldn't have done. I let people, let them do things, just to try and feel something other than emptiness, and it never worked. No one really wanted me before you. Sometimes..." he trailed off with a sigh, leaning his head against Sam's shoulder.

"Sometimes I wonder if I'm good enough for you. You're everything I could have dreamed of. You're beautiful, smart, funny, gorgeous, artistic, perfect, kind, sexy, a great listening, the most beautiful person I have ever met. You're my best friend, my lover, my brother, my everything. I just... I want to be good enough. I can kinda understand now why she left, but growing up... growing up I always wondered why I wasn't good enough for mom, why she left me. Why I wasn't good enough, or smart enough, or manly enough for dad to be proud of."

He sighed, "And then, then I met you. And for the first time in my life, for the first damn time in a long time, I felt like life was worth living, like I had something to live for. You have no clue, no clue whatsoever how close I came... I had had it all planned out, a few days before school started, had everything set up, but I just couldn't do it. It was like there was this voice telling me to just wait, just wait a little while and everything will be okay." 

Dean turned his head away, he hadn't wanted to bring this up, hadn't wanted to talk about how broken he had felt before meeting Sam, but he just couldn't help himself. "Sammy, you gotta promise me something. I need your word, that later, tonight, you'll make me yours like I made you mine. I need that, I swear I feel that is the only part of me that I didn't let anyone touch, and I want... I want you to claim me, make me yours... please Sam, you have to do this for me." 

Sam listened closely to Dean, thinking about how much Dean had changed his own life. He didn't understand how Dean loved him so much. He couldn't see these things that Dean saw. There had been so many times that Sam had just wanted to run away from it all, because it was too much. Once again, he found himself seeing how similar he and Dean were. Once again, he saw how nobody had ever truly understood him until Dean came along.

His heart about snapped in half at the thought of Dean killing himself. His whole body about snapped at that thought. It wasn't that he himself had never felt like that, but Dean? Dean shouldn't ever have felt that way. Dean was beautiful and perfect. He tried to imagine how things would've been if Dean had followed through. He thought about how he would've seen all those sad faces on his first day of school. How he would've heard everyone talking about this amazing kid who was really athletic and talented and who everybody loved. He would've wondered who the kid was. Sam would've never fit in. It would've been like it always was when he moved to another place. His stomach felt sick at the thought of Dean never being his. He could've imagine it. Not really.

He watched those green eyes and their pleading look, he listened as Dean asked him. "Dean, I don't know what to say," Sam kept a hand on the older boy's cheek. "You're more than good enough for me. Damn, Dean, I don't even know how I'm supposed to tell you how much I fucking love you. You're all I think about. I don't care that you didn't wait. I don't care that maybe you've done some things you regret. Don't you think that I've done some things I wasn't so proud of?" Memories flashed behind Sam's eyes, things he never wanted to think about again. Life as a hunter was just like that. 

Sam kissed Dean gently, letting their lips linger for a moment, "I'll do anything for you. Anything. You know that right?" He searched Dean's eyes. "I promise--No, I want to make you mine," he smiled softly, "since I'm already yours."

Dean swallowed hard, nodding as he looked deep into Sam's eyes. There was so much about his past that he wasn't proud of, so much he wished he could erase. But still, Sam loved him, loved him for himself, for the flawed broken mess that Dean was. He had always felt so alone, even when surrounded by a crowd of his "friends", none of them had ever taken the time to actually get to know the REAL Dean Winchester, they only saw the mask he let them see. They only saw the forced smiles and joking attitude.

Dean doesn't think he ever really smiled before meeting Sam. Sam, his perfect, beloved Sammy. The one person who not only knew his crap, but accepted him for it all the same. The same person he had known within minutes of meeting that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. No one had ever, ever made Dean feel the way that Sam did, like he actually mattered.

He knew the rest of the world would look down on their relationship, hell their parents, and god was it odd to think those words, their parents would probably try separating them. Dean started to panic, sitting up from the bed, going to grab his clothes. He pulled them on, shoving Sam's clothing at him. He started grabbing clothing out of Sam's closet, not noticing the startled look on Sam's face. "We need, we need to pack, Sammy. They're gonna make us separate, I can't do that. We gotta go, please say you'll come with me. I can't lose you." 

Sam could see Dean thinking deeply, he could always tell when Dean was trying to come up with a plan. 

Suddenly, Dean was practically jumping off the bed and grabbing clothes--even Sam's clothes. Soon, Sam was covered in all the clothing that Dean was throwing at him. He was saying that they needed to pack, that they needed to leave, stuff about people separating them. Sam's head was spinning for about the billionth time today. Was it impossible for him to ever have normal days? 'Your mom kills monsters as a job...' he thought. Okay, so normal was probably out of the picture, but still!

"Woah, hey," Sam shoved the clothes off of him after pulling on a pair of sweat pants, "Dean, slow down." he grabbed Dean by the shoulders and could see the vast fullness of panic in them. "What are you talking about Dean?" he asked him in almost a whisper.

His mom--their parents...--would be home soon and he didn't want Dean freaking out when they got there. Obviously, tonight had been rough on all of them. Although, Sam hadn't exactly pictured this happening after the first time he had sex. Then again, he hadn't pictured that he'd lose his virginity to his brother either...but things change.

"You're not losing me okay?" Sam brushed his hand over Dean's jaw, "Just tell me what's going on. What's wrong?" 

"Dad, and Mary... Mom, they aren't gonna want us together, Sammy. They won't let us be together... I just know it, we have to... we have to go. I can't lose you. Can't, you're mine. Never giving you up." he said, pulling away from Sam, grabbing him by the chin and kissing him gently.

Dean resumed his packing, "We gotta go back to Dad's house, get my things. I can't, I can't lose you. Gonna lose you if we don't run, can't live without you."

Dean was in full on panic mode, terrified of losing Sam. 

"Dean you don't know that," Sam grabbed Dean's hand, "We already told them about...about us, so it's not like they don't know," deep-down Sam was just as scared as Dean about this. "There's nothing that's ever gonna make me leave you anyways," Sam moved his body closer to Dean's.

It wasn't that he didn't understand Dean's panic. In fact, he understood all too well. He knew that no one would really approve of what was going on between them. He knew that their parents would be happy about it and that they'd discourage it--maybe even make them end it. But this all seemed so sudden. To leave his mom right after she found out that Dean was right here the whole time? To leave right after they found out all of this stuff? It just added onto the crazy. His eyes raised back up to meet Dean's and he knew that Dean was still against staying. Sam could read him like a book.

"But," Sam sighed, "If you wanna run, I wanna run okay?" Sam kissed him.

He'd do anything for Dean. And the more he thought about it, the more he wondered if they'd end up running away eventually anyways.

Dean smiled at Sam, kissing him gently. He grabbed the bags and started down the stairs, knowing that Sam was right behind him. They were half way across the living room when the door opened, John and Mary stepping inside. Dean stopped dead in his tracks, Sam bumping into him.

"Dean? Sam? What's going on?" Mary asked, quickly figuring out that the boys were about to run. 

John motioned at the couch, the boys going instantly to it, "Where were you going?"

Dean swallowed nervously, tongue snaking out to moisten his suddenly dry lips. He smiled when Sam reached out and grabbed his hand, needing the grounding it gave him, "We, we were going to go. We can't... I can't lose him, Dad. I can't. You don't know... you have no clue how much he means to me. He saved my life. I... I'm not lying about that, Sam is the reason I'm alive and having this conversation with you. And I know... I know you're gonna want me to give him up. I can't, it'll kill me if I have to let him go."

Sam's eyes widened when their parents came in through the door as they were about to leave. The look on his mom's face said that she knew exactly what they were doing. After all, she'd done it many times before. She's left more places than Sam could count. John motioned to the couch, and by the look on his face, Sam wasn't really about to question the man. He sat close to Dean, grabbing his hand and rubbing those familiar circles there.

Dean sounded too nervous and too desperate when he spoke, but Sam just held his hand through it. "We didn't want you to make us," he looked over at Dean, "We didn't want you to make us stop being together." he leaned in closer to Dean, just trying to make himself feel safer. "Mom, I can't. I won't leave Dean okay? And a few months ago, you wouldn't have thought anything of us being together."

"Things were a little different," John added.

"I wasn't talking to you," Sam knew he sounded a little rude, but his eyes never left his mom, "Mom, you knew we were together. I know you did. You saw it. You see everything. Can't you see that it's all still there?" Sam's voice was shaking a little. "Mom, I love him." Sam tried to bite back a tear, but it fell on it's own accord.

"Sammy..." Mary's face softened, but she seemed to be at a loss for words.

John stared at them, Dean's words hitting him like a slap in the face. He had noticed Dean becoming withdrawn and sullen a few months back, this was after the intensive partying, and doing things John didn't even want to think about. He remembers how hollow and empty Dean had seemed until he met Sam. 

"Dean, please, tell me you weren't going to..." he trailed off, heart breaking. To think his son could have thought things were bad enough that ending it was the only option... no he couldn't think about that. While he didn't agree with Dean and Sam's relationship, he knew, knew without a doubt that there would be no separating the boys. They had already tried running, already had decided to escape the only family they knew just to be together. 

Dean sat silently, staring at his hands, every so often looking over at Sam and giving him a look that made John realize that Dean was serious, that he felt he had nothing without Sam. John crossed the room, kneeling in front of his boys, tilting Dean's face up to look at him, "I am so sorry I failed... that I didn't see how bad things were for you." He pulled Dean into his arms, rocking him as he sobbed against his shoulder.

Sam was shocked to see John crying like that. In one night, it felt like John had completely changed. It was like John had just been waiting for Mary this entire time. Sam reached over cautiously and set his hand on John's shoulder, trying to be comforting.

"Oh Dean," Sam's mom sat on the other side of Dean, "I'm so sorry," she murmured. It reminded Dean of the apologies she'd make when Sam got hurt on a case. So genuine and so sad. His mom loved Dean, Sam could see it in her eyes. Sam gripped Dean's hand tighter, just to let him know that Sam still loved him most of all.

Sam jumped a little when John wrapped an arm around him too, including him in the embrace. He was struggling to relax into it, but then he felt his mom's hand smooth over the top of his head. Maybe things would be okay. Or at least for tonight...

Sam hoped.


	3. Friends New and Old -- Loves Lost and Found

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "The boys are pleasing each other in a sexual manner," Castiel answered matter-of-factly.

They ended up spending the night at Mary and Sam's house, everyone too exhausted to do much of anything else. Dean fell asleep holding Sam in his arms, still not quite sure how things were going to end up, but knowing that as long as he had his Sam everything would work out.

When the boys woke in the morning they found John and Mary seated at the kitchen table drinking coffee. Dean didn't know what to say, as so many things he had been keeping secret had been brought out in the open. He had never wanted his father to know that he had come close to killing himself before he met Sam, hell part of him hadn't wanted Sam to ever find that out, but he knew that he couldn't keep anything from the other teen. Dean had never once thought about how his father would have felt if he had actually gone through with it, had never questioned why his dad had just shut down when he was a child.

Dean grabbed himself a cup of coffee and was about to sit down when there was a knock at the door. Everyone was confused to who would be there, and Mary went to answer. The shocked look on her face at the man standing there spoke more than words could ever say.

The man looked like he had been through the ringer, like he had been to Hell itself and had clawed his way out. He was barely standing, only being held up by two others Dean really couldn't see. Dean and Sam rushed to Mary's side, John not seconds behind them.

Dean swallowed hard when he finally saw the face of one of the men, no he couldn't be seeing what, no who he thought he was seeing.

Sam had sleepily followed Dean down stairs, stalking the scent of hot coffee. It was an odd sight to see his mom and John--dad--standing in the kitchen talking to each other. He watched Dean fix them both a cup of coffee and he grinned when Dean handed him a cup.

They all turned to face the door when someone knocked. In Sam's mind he tried to think of all the people it could be. Honestly, the only person who had knocked on their door had been Dean and he had stopped knocking a couple weeks after they'd met.

When his mom opened the door, Sam hurried to her side due to the gap she made. He looked in the doorway with wide eyes. Two of the men looked just like...no that wasn't right...but those eyes...

"Oh my God," Mary murmured in a low voice.

Dean followed as Mary ushered the three men inside, a frown on his face. He stood close to Sam, resting his arm across the other boy's shoulders. Looking over he noticed the trail of hickeys lining Sam's neck, silently thanking his parents for not mentioning the marks the night before. He sat down on the floor, pulling Sam to sit with him as they took in the sight before them.

"What happened?" Mary asked, finally breaking the silence.

"I was punished because of interfering in the timeline. I barely was able to save myself," the blue eyed man said quietly. Dean could tell that the men with him were the only reason he was even sitting upright. "We were able, able to do a spell to send us here."

"The spell should be untraceable," the taller of the other two men said, the one who looked so much like Sam. He looked up, as if noticing John and Sam and Dean for the first time, swallowing hard. 

Dean didn't like how broken and damaged the man's eyes looked, so he turned his gaze away, looking down to where Sam had intertwined their fingers. He gave Sam's hand a quick squeeze, placing a kiss against his temple.

Sam was still baffled with one of the men. The one that had Dean's eyes. They weren't just similar to Dean's eye or just looked like Dean's eyes. They were Dean's eyes. Sam would know those eyes anywhere. However, he didn't like that the man seemed so rough, his hands didn't looked gentle like Dean's and his arms had visible scars. If Sam were to guess, he'd say that they were hunting scars.

He listened to the dark haired one--who was awkwardly wearing a tan trench coat--talk about a spell. A spell? To send these men back here? But why?

Sam felt Dean's fingers tighten against his and could feel how Dean was looking back and forth between Sam and the tallest man. The tall man looked familiar too...almost too familiar. They shared a look before the tall man returned to helping Cas stay upright.

He wanted to ask questions, but Sam's voice was currently being held hostage by his throat. What was happening?

Dean shifted uncomfortably under the men's gazes, wishing he was wearing more than just a t-shirt and boxers. "I'm, I'm gonna go change," he said quietly, standing to leave the room. He knew Sam was following him, he always knew when his Sam was near. As soon as they were in Sam's room, Dean closed the door, pulling Sam against him, resting his forehead against Sam's before giving him a soft kiss. 

The older man that looked so much like Sam, yet so different had rocked Dean to his core. He needed at the very least this, being able to kiss his Sam, to make sure everything was okay. "God, Sammy, I promise I won't let whatever happen to him happen to you. It would kill me to let you get so... broken, lost. I vow that I will do whatever I can within my power to protect you, and I know that you'll do the same for me."

They changed quickly, walking out of the room before anything could happen, only to find only the two men who looked a lot like them sitting on the couch.

"Where..." Dean began, looking around for Mary and John.

The one who had Sam's eyes said, "They went to get supplies. They made us promise to make sure you two didn't try running again." 

Dean nodded at him, understanding his parents worries, "And your friend?"

The man who looked like Dean, but a Dean who had been through Hell answered, "In the guest room, he passed out. Mom... your mom told us to put him in there."

Dean and Sam caught his slip, how he had been about to just refer to her as Mom. They needed to know everything.

Sam almost missed the man's slip up, but not quite. He'd called Sam's mom his own mom. Which didn't make much sense. Sam wasn't ready to find out that he had more siblings. However, these men didn't look young enough to be his brothers, so that was comforting at least.

"Where are you two from?" Sam looked at them.

Both of the men exchanged a look as if they were reading each other's minds. It made Sam feel uncomfortable. The expressions on their faces reminded him so much of his own expressions and of Dean's expressions. It was all just odd.

"We're from Lawrence" the one with Dean's eyes answered.

"Kansas. Lawrence, Kansas," the taller one said in a correcting voice, "That's how we know--your parents, we grew up near their old house."

Dean looked at them, letting out a short little laugh, "You're lying. What the hell aren't you telling us?" After the last 24 hours he wasn't in the mood to put up with half truths and outright lies. He crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at the older men, "I mean I heard Mary, I heard her whisper the name Castiel when she saw your friend."

Dean could tell that Sam was staring at him, he wasn't sure if Sam had heard what their mother had said but he had, and he remembered her saying that Castiel was the one who had told her to leave. Dean might not understand what was going on, might not understand anything about hunting and everything supernatural, but he knew what he had heard.

He noticed how the men slightly flinched when he called her Mary, 'Interesting, wonder what that was about.' 

The one with Sam's eyes sighed, "It's... complicated. We want to wait until everyone is here, everyone is awake before telling our story."

"I heard the name too," Sam thought for a moment, "No, that can't be right. That's an ang--" he stared at the taller man, trying to decipher that look in his eyes.

"You're right," the man like Dean nodded.

"But they don't," Sam swallowed, "There's no proof that they exist."

"Would you look at that," the man like him chuckled, "he sounds just like you."

The man like Dean glared over at the other man. Once again, they shared looks that seemed so familiar. Sam watched the way they moved, as if they were completely in sync. It frightened him that they reminded him of, well, they reminded him of himself and Dean.

"At least tell us your names," Sam offered as a compromise.

Dean nodded at Sam's words. He wanted answers, and if they wanted to wait that was fine, but he needed to know their names, he had to know, had to know if he was going insane or if something that he didn't have words for was going on.

The taller of the two smiled, nodding once. "My name is Sam Winchester." 

Dean's eyes widened at that. 'Sam Winchester, my Sammy all grown up, my Sam who has my last name.'

Dean could hear Sam swallow hard, and reached his hand out to grasp his boyfriend's. Things were crazy, stuff like this just didn't happen, but Dean had decided that whatever happened, he was going to believe as long as he had Sam everything would be okay.

He turned his eyes on the other man, waiting for his response.

The other man rolled his eyes, "Dammit Sammy," he sighed, "I'm Dean Winchester."

Huh, so even the other version of Dean called him 'Sammy'. Sam paused for a moment, why was that the part of this that struck him the most? Sam grabbed onto his Dean's hand and held on tightly. A few hours ago they had been experiencing what Sam considered the best time of his life to date, and now they were standing in front of themselves...older, different versions of themselves. Hearing the man say Sam Winchester made Sam get butterflies. Although, he knew that they had the same last name due to the fact that they were siblings, he still enjoyed hearing his name paired with Dean's.

"So you're," Sam squinted, looking them over, "You two are us."

"Sort of," Sam shrugged.

"Sammy," other Dean warned.

"Oh, like they weren't figuring that out," other Sam shot him a look. Sam knew that look. Sam made that look. Sam made that look at Dean all the time.

It got quiet again, all of them awkwardly standing around the room. Sam still kept his grip on Dean, a little scared to let go. He was still wondering what the deal with Castiel was, but he guessed that other Dean and other Sam probably didn't want to talk about it yet. He was hoping that his mom would explain. Or at least that someone would explain. After all, this wasn't exactly how he thought his morning would go.

Dean was getting slightly annoyed at the tone the older version of himself was taking with his brother. He couldn't stand it when people talked bad or in harsh tones to his Sam, and hearing the words coming out in basically his voice made him a little sick to his stomach. He looked over at Sam, knowing he was probably having similar thoughts. 

"What I don't get is the hair," Dean said with a smirk at the older version of himself. While it was true that Dean's hair wasn't quite as long as Sam's was, it wasn't the short almost military cut that the older man wore. "I mean, it's so short."

He could feel Sam start to laugh silently against him, bringing a smile to his face. He looked over at Sam, "What, it's true? I don't think you'd ever let me cut my hair that short."

The older Sam's eyes widened at that, as if he was starting to realize the connection between the teenagers. His eyes were drawn to the hickeys on Sam's neck, before looking at Dean as if he was going to yell at him for leaving them there. "How could you do that to him? He's your brother."

Sam was caught up in Dean's smile, it always made him forget about his surroundings. Then the older version of himself starting freaking out. Sam saw where other Sam was staring at his neck. Immediately, Sam jerked his hand up to cover them. Not that he was ashamed, because he wasn't, but it was obviously frowned upon at the moment.

"He didn't do anything to me," Sam defended Dean, feeling a little angry that older Sam would object. Honestly, look at how older Dean turned out--a little bit rough for the wear--but he was gorgeous. He couldn't imagine himself ever not wanting Dean, no matter what universe they were in.

Once older Dean's eyes saw what older Sam had been talking about, he got this look on his face. It was one that Sam recognized. It was this look of shame almost. He watched older Dean glance over at older Sam and wondered what he was thinking. Maybe his and Dean's relationship wasn't the only one that ever crossed the boundaries of 'brotherly'. What had the two men been through? The older version of himself looked so hurt over how everything had turned out. Surely the life that Sam and Dean were leading now wasn't worse than what the older versions of themselves had been through. Right?

Dean glared at the older Sam, "You don't have any right to judge us. You don't know a damn thing about me and Sammy. Who do you think you are, trying to make us feel bad about this? You weren't here, you don't know what our lives are like."

He stood, pacing the room, the panic from the night before hitting him hard. "Not good, not good, Sammy we can't stay, we have to go. I can't... can't lose you, Sammy. I won't lose you."

The older Dean stood, grabbing him by the arms gently, "You need to calm down. Yeah, we don't know everything, so maybe you can explain it to us, make us understand what's going on here."

Dean let himself be pushed back onto the couch next to Sam, who promptly wrapped his arms around him, holding him in place.

Sam was trying to calm Dean out of his 'fight or flight' mode. However, he found that older Dean managed to do that pretty well by making them sit on the couch. Sam almost chuckled, because he wanted them to explain what their lives had been like? How was Sam supposed to explain all of them. Though, he supposed that the older versions of them probably knew a lot about hunting--at least from the scars they were sporting. Sam stayed snuggled close to Dean, making sure that Dean knew he wouldn't be losing him any time soon.

"Well," Sam started, "Mom left before I was born, left the family I mean, and so I grew up hunting. I assume that you both hunt," Sam looked them both up and down.

"Takes one to know one I suppose," older Dean sat down in a chair across from them.

"Mom and I move around a lot," Sam continued, "I've never really had a home. I didn't even know that I had any other family outside of my mom." Sam glanced over at his Dean, checking to see if that panicked look was still there, but it was fading. 'Good' he thought. "Then we moved here and Mom told me that we would stay here for a while. She said that she was going to try and settle us in this time. You know, it's my freshman year, and I think she was trying to let me at least have high school all in one place."

He watched the other two brothers exchange glances, "I can see why she would want that," older Sam murmured.

"That's how I met Dean," Sam squeezed his boyfriend's hand and smiled over at him. "He talked to me on the first day and we hit it off." Sam's eyes never left Dean's, "It's like I'd been waiting to meet him."

It took everything Sam had not to just lean over and kiss those perfect lips, because it was true. Sam had felt like he had just been waiting his whole life for Dean to come along. Now that he had found him, there wasn't a chance in Hell that he'd ever let him go.

Dean was really starting to get annoyed at himself, he was panicking too much and it wasn't healthy. He knew that Sam loved him, knew that Sam would never leave him willingly, but everything, everything was feeling like it was trying to pull them apart. He didn't like the accusations from the older Sam, how he made him feel like he was dirty and wrong for being with the person that he loved more than life itself. But there was something in the other Dean's eyes, something that spoke of understanding. 

"I probably wouldn't be here if I hadn't met Sam," Dean whispered, looking down, not wanting to see the pity he knew would be in the older men's eyes. "I'm not being some overly dramatic kid, I mean it. I came so close to ending everything, but... I don't know, there was this voice, this voice that told me to just hold on a little longer, to not give up just yet. I'd never heard that voice before... but I figured, what's one more week, you know? How bad could sticking around one more week be?"

The older Sam gasped in shock. He had always assumed that if they had had a normal childhood that Dean wouldn't have as many issues as he did. He could understand why his brother did the self destructive things he did, Hell Sam had done his fair share of them himself. But hearing that this younger version of Dean had wanted to kill himself, he couldn't understand that. 

He was trying so hard not to stare at the teenager; he had forgotten how beautiful his brother had been at that age, had buried those thoughts deep in his mind. And over the years as things had gotten worse he ignored all the want that he felt, letting his frustration grow until their relationship was strained. He looked away, feeling the younger Sam glaring at him, like he was judging him for daring to say anything about their relationship.

Sam watched his older self gaze at Dean. The look started off one of shock, but somehow he watched as his features softened into an understanding. He watched both of the brothers sigh simultaneously and it almost made him laugh. It seemed impossible, but he actually thought that the other versions of them were even more in tune with each other.

"So you two just met a few months ago?" other Sam asked.

"Yeah and we just found out that we were," Sam's words got a little caught, "Um, that we were--you know--brothers last night."

"Wow," other Sam raises his eyebrows and ran a hand through very long hair. Sam always thought about growing his hair out. He shook his head, staring at himself just seemed bizarre.

"It wasn't like we knew that we were," damn, just saying the word was hard for Sam.

There was a rustling sound in the other room. All of them turned their heads to face the doorway and Sam could hear staggering steps. The two men jerked up from their seats and hurried over to help the other man into the living room. Sam noticed how concerned their faces were over--what was his name again?--Castiel, that's right. Was this really an angel? Part of him was in awe and part of him was wondering why an angel would be wearing a--currently bloody--trench coat.

Dean pulled Sam closer to him, making room on the couch for Castiel. He could tell that the older versions of Sam and himself cared for the man, the angel 'and how odd was it thinking those words', as they helped him lower himself into a seated position.

"Where..." Castiel began, looking around the room.

"They left to go get supplies, Cas. They should be back soon," the older Dean said.

Castiel turned his gaze onto Dean, which made him very uncomfortable. It was like the man could see all the way into his soul, see all the crap he had done, like he could see how damn close Dean had come to ending everything. Dean looked away again, not liking how the angel's gaze was making him feel.

"I'm glad you listened to me, Dean. I'm glad that you held on."

With those words all eyes were on Castiel. Had he interfered more than just once in Sam and Dean's life, had he been the one to stop Dean?

Sam was struck by the angel. There was this aura about him that filled the room. But Sam hadn't been expecting those words. Castiel was the one that asked Dean to hold on? An actual angel told him to stay alive because he would be meeting Sam. An angel. Wanted Sam and Dean. To meet. Even in this universe.

"You were the one who talked to him?" Sam's voice came out as barely a whisper.

"Yes," the angel answered simply.

He wasn't sure what got into him, but suddenly he was practically leaping on the angel and hugging him as hard as he possibly could. He couldn't even begin to express how thankful he was. It was like his mom had always said. Angels were watching over him. Real angels were watching own him and Dean. Sam pulled away when he heard the disgruntled noises coming from the angel and he realized that Castiel was probably in physical pain from whatever they had just been through.

Sam was just in shock.

Dean didn't know whether to laugh or to cry at the look on Castiel's face when Sam hugged him. When Sam settled back down next to him, Dean buried his face on Sam's shoulder, not wanting the others to see him cry. The whole last day had been overwhelming to him, and all Dean wanted to do was hide away with Sam. He stood, walking out of the room before he broke down, flopping face first into Sam's pillows.

The older Sam and Dean and Castiel watched as Sam followed Dean out of the room with questioning looks on their faces. Sam stood, meaning to follow after the teenagers, but his brother grabbed him by the wrist, forcing him to let them be.

Dean felt it when Sam entered the room, locking the door behind him and climbing onto the bed to wrap him in his arms. "Sorry, I... I'm sorry I'm such a mess, Sam. I shouldn't... I shouldn't let things get to me like they are. I wish I was stronger for you."

Dean let out a deep frustrated sigh, cursing his emotions and his body for reacting to Sam just trying to comfort him. His body was screaming at him to beg Sam to touch him, to beg Sam to claim him as his, to reclaim Sam again, anything. He turned in Sam's arms, coming face to face with him, lips inches apart. He leaned in, placing a soft kiss against Sam's lips, hands resting on Sam's chest, gently grasping at the fabric of his shirt.

"Dean, don't be sorry," Sam petted over Dean's hair, "Never be sorry to me." Sam held the boy's face between his hands and kissed him softly. "I love you so much, you're the strongest person I know," Sam pressed Dean back against the bed. "You're never allowed to do anything like that okay? You're never allowed to leave me." Sam said his words between the kisses that he was trailing down Dean's throat.

He intertwined their fingers; he just wanted Dean to know how much he loved him. He wanted Dean to know that there wasn't anyone else in the world that he loved more. He wanted him to know that he couldn't sleep unless Dean snuck out of his house and into Sam's room--which he did more nights than not. Sam sucked against the skin on Dean's collarbone, biting and nibbling as he did so. His throat let out a hum when Dean's hand let go of his and wound itself in Sam's hair.

"I've got something I want to show you," Sam pulled away from Dean and noticed the defined mark he'd made on his boyfriend's skin, "but you have to promise not to make fun of me okay?" Sam got off the bed and started rummaging around on one of his shelves, "I'm being serious, it's sort of stupid, but you can't make jokes."

Dean leaned up on his elbows, watching as Sam searched his shelves. His eyes kept being drawn to Sam's denim encased ass, and all he wanted to do was grab it and kiss it and leave marks all over it. He knew he shouldn't, for starters they weren't alone in the house, and secondly their parents could get home at any minute, but Dean had a problem controlling himself around Sam.

He pulled off his t-shirt, tossing it on the floor near Sam's feet, grinning when Sam looked back at him and the sharp intake of air Sam made when he saw Dean running a hand along his own chest. "Nothing you can ever show me is stupid, Sammy," Dean whispered, his hand snaking downwards to pop open the button of his jeans. "Everything that makes you you is perfection, you know that don't you?"

Sam accidentally bumped some things off the shelf, but fucking really. Dean was currently stroking his own chest and working off his pants. Sam's mouth was dropped open and he forced it back closed. Turning back around, Sam grabbed a notebook off the shelf and made his way over to the bed again. He sat down beside Dean, letting his eyes glance over the boy's body before jerking back away. He was trying to be open or romantic or vulnerable or something and Dean was just sitting over here mostly naked.

"You know how I told you I liked art?" Sam asked remembering the day they first met and he couldn't help but smile a little. Dean nodded at him, finally stopping with the stroking of his chest. "Here," Sam swallowed and handed him the notebook, "I've been drawing lately."

Sam watched Dean's face closely when he opened the notebook up. "The first few are from when I moved here," Sam commented, seeing drawings of his backyard and the street and one of his mom. "But uh," Sam ducked his head, "then I met you Dean." Dean was turning page after page of drawings of himself. Sam hadn't meant to keep drawing him, but he found that he couldn't stop. It was just random moments. One of Dean sleeping that Sam did the first night Dean stayed over, one of Dean sitting a few seats ahead of him in the one class that they had together, one of Dean talking to his mom one night when they didn't know Sam was watching. Okay, so maybe it had gotten a little creepy, but Sam didn't know any words that could tell Dean how much he loved him better than the drawings could show him.

Dean swallowed hard, resting his head against Sam's shoulder as his boyfriend showed him the drawings. "They're amazing, Sammy. They're perfect, just like you." He placed a soft kiss against Sam's cheek. "Sometime, sometime I'd like you to draw me while I was watching, I mean if you want to. I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable doing it."

He looked down at the images again, proud and amazed at how awesome Sam was. "How did I get the most amazingly awesome artist, most gorgeous boyfriend in the entire world? Because, you are. I didn't think, I didn't think I could fall any more in love with you than I already was... but every day I fall harder and harder for you." 

Dean smiled, breathing in Sam's scent, "Did I ever tell you that I can't sleep without you? I try but I can't, I just can't fall asleep unless you're next to me, unless you're in my arms."

Sam didn't realize that he was holding his breath until he could feel Dean's on his skin. "I can't sleep without you either," he smiled before turning to kiss Dean. He wrapped his arms around Dean's neck, straddling him, "You're so perfect Dean," he mumbled against Dean's mouth, "That's why I can't stop drawing you, I can't ever get you as perfect as you are in real life," he swept his tongue across Dean's bottom lip before nipping at it gently. Sam's hands trailed down Dean's back, admiring how perfectly sculpted he was. "You really are like a fucking piece of art Dean," he lowered his lips back to the little bruise forming on Dean's collarbone, enjoying the way it got a moan from Dean.

He could feel Dean's hand sliding under his shirt, stroking his back slowly. Finally, Sam pulled away long enough for Dean to tug his shirt over his head. Their lips met again passionately. Sam giggled when Dean fell back flat against the bed, tugging Sam down with him. "Dean are you sure that--" Fuck, Dean's tongue on his neck, "I mean, an angel and ourselves are down--mmm---stairs." Sam couldn't stop his body from moving with Dean's, gently rocking his hips against Dean's.

Dean pulled his mouth away long enough to answer, "I don't care bout them. I just... all I care about is you, being with you, taking care of you, loving you. The rest of the world really doesn't concern me, not like you do." He groaned as Sam rocked into him, hands moving to clamp onto Sam's ass. "Mmm, so sexy, you have no clue what you do to me, do you? Can't stop thinking about you, think about you all the time."

He licked at Sam's neck, biting gently in just the right spot, the spot that always had Sam cursing with pleasure. "Wish I was an artist, so I could draw or paint or sculpt you. Show you how sexy you are." Dean arched into Sam, soft curses falling from his lips as the younger boy thrust against him. 

"Sammy, please, need you, need you so badly," Dean moaned, his head thrown back against the pillows. "Need you in me, please, Sammy. Need you to make me yours, don't wanna belong to anyone else."

Sam was moaning softly because Dean knew every spot that drove him crazy. He kissed him roughly, "Dean I'm gonna do this right," he smiled. "I want to worship you." He licked his lips before kissing across Dean's jaw, "I want to make all of you mine," Sam was surprised by the possessive tone in his voice. He was going to take his time, he didn't care what happened downstairs or if anyone knocked, he was going to take his own sweet time with Dean.

Sam ran his hands of Dean's sides, feeling goose bumps come up beneath them. He licked the flat of his tongue over Dean's adam's apple before giving it a single suck. "Love you so much Dean," he kissed over his boyfriend's collarbone, appreciating the mark he'd left and making another one on the other side. Every little gasp or moan that Dean made, just made Sam's blood pump a little faster and his head spin a little more. Nipping, licking, kissing, biting his way down Dean's chest, Sam sucked a nipple into his mouth. He grinned when Dean arched into him. Sam moaned when Dean moved his leg up to rub against Sam's cock, reminding him how much he wanted this too. 'Focus' Sam breathed, he was going to take his time even if it killed him.

Continuing his way down Dean's stomach, he enjoyed the way it moved up and down quickly with Dean's uneven breaths and he knew that Dean was up on his elbows watching him. Sam's fingers tugged at Dean's jeans--that were already unbuttoned because Dean just had to be a tease earlier. He got off the bed and pulled them off before climbing back between Dean's legs. Sam sucked a mark onto Dean's hip and then kissed his way down Dean's thigh. Blatantly ignoring Dean's erection, Sam kissed down Dean's legs. His hands stroked over the skin. Eventually, he'd kissed and licked at every part of Dean's body--well, almost.

Sam's hands gripped Dean's hips as he mouthed on Dean's cock over his boxers. He nuzzled at it, enjoying how Dean was moaning and how Dean smelled. His whole world was just Dean. "I want to make this so good for you Dean, love you so much," Sam tugged Dean's boxers down, "wanna make you mine."

Sam, Dean, and Castiel sat on the couch waiting for the teenagers to come back downstairs, thinking that they would only be gone for a few minutes, long enough for Dean to calm down. After about twenty minutes though, Sam was tired of waiting, and got up. He headed up the stairs, and was about to knock on the door when he heard a low moan coming from inside.

\---

Dean was in Heaven, the feelings Sam was dragging from his body had him trembling with want. His fingers snaked into Sam's hairs, not holding him but just resting there as the younger boy nuzzled at his crotch. "God, Sammy, love you," he said, his voice rough with want and need. He looked down at his young lover, their eyes locking as Sam teased him with his mouth and tongue. The sounds that were coming out of Dean's mouth sounded like the sound-track of a really hot porno.

\---

Sam backed away from the door, swallowing hard as he went back downstairs. A blush covered his face, which only intensified when he saw the questioning look on his brother's face.

\---

"Sammy, please," Dean begged, needing more than what his boyfriend was giving him, "need you, stop teasing, Baby. Don't wanna cum yet, want you in me when I cum."

Sam pulled away and fumbled in the nightstand until he found the lube. He hurried back to Dean, kissing him firmly on the lips. "I don't, uh," Sam looked at Dean, "I've never done this before." He gave a small smile, "I'm just gonna, you know, do my best," Sam hadn't realized how nervous he was until right then. Suddenly, it all felt a little bit terrifying. What if he hurt Dean? What is he wasn't any good? After all, they'd only done it once. 'Stop it,' he thought snapping out of his worries and focusing on the beautiful boy beneath him.

He slicked up his fingers--maybe a little too much, but that couldn't hurt right? Sam just rubbed and teased Dean's entrance, still kissing him softly. He pressed with one finger, pulling away to gauge Dean's reaction. The boys eyes fluttered shut and arched into Sam's touch. Sam wondered if Dean had ever let someone do this to him.  
\---  
"What's up with you," Dean stared at his brother who was hurrying down the stairs.

"Nothing, just um," Sam wasn't sure where to begin, wasn't even sure how what he'd just heard made him feel.

"The boys are pleasing each other in a sexual manner," Castiel answered matter-of-factly.

Both Sam and Dean stared at the angel for a moment. Dean's face suddenly flushing like Sam's was. That wasn't exactly what he'd been expecting. 'Dammit!' Dean shook his head, now he had a visual going on and he did not need that shit. Picturing him and his younger brother doing...well, doing that? 'Stop it!' Dean rubbed at his face, willing the thoughts away.

Dean groaned loudly, the feeling of Sam's finger breaching him was beyond anything he had ever felt before in his life. "God, Sammy, so good, never felt anything like it. Please, come on, Babe, more." Dean knew he was whining, but he didn't care, he just needed more of Sam, anything from him. 'Was this how it was for him? God, I never knew how it would feel, glad I waited for him to do this.'  
\---  
Sam stared at the angel, jaw dropping at the innocently blunt way he just informed Dean of what was going on upstairs. He sat down, closing his eyes, trying not to picture what was going on in the bedroom but failing miserably. When he looked back up a few seconds later, Castiel was no longer in the room, leaving Sam and Dean alone together. "Where's Cas?"

"He went to go lay down again," his brother said in clipped tones, refusing to look at him.  
\---  
Dean groaned as Sam slid his fingers inside of him, drawing his pleasure out. God he knew that Sam had never done this with anyone before, but damn if the boy wasn't a natural. "Sam, Sammy, please, more, stop teasing, Baby Boy."

Sam shuddered at Dean's pleas, he'd never seen anything that just plain dirty, filthy, sexy, hot, the list could go on and on. He pulled his fingers out. Coating his cock with lube, he hissed at the the temperature difference. He stroked himself a couple times, just to take the edge off.

Dean yanked him down roughly, obviously getting fed up with how long this was taking. Sam chuckled against Dean's skin before kissing him again. Dean's hand snaked between them and guided Sam. It was nothing but blunt pressure and then the head of Sam's cock was in and the world was currently perfect. "Dean!" Sam gasped dropping his head against Dean's shoulder, he'd never felt anything like this. Slowly, Sam pushed his way in, trying his very best not to rush it--there wasn't a chance that Sam would be willing to hurt Dean. He let out a contented sigh when he was finally buried to the hilt.

"Dean," he kissed his lover's lips, "You okay? Am I hurting you?" he kissed him again, "Never wanna hurt you, never."

\---

Dean looked over at his brother wondering if maybe he was imagining it too. By the flush that was still on Sam's cheeks, he guessed that he probably was. Dean felt guilty. What Cas had done, to save them and their family in another universe, it wasn't supposed to end up like this. What was between Sam and Dean, well, that wasn't supposed to transfer over. Not that they'd touched in, what, years? Dean sighed stealing glances over at Sam.

"Didn't see this coming," Dean tried to get a laugh out of Sam, or at least a smile. "Come on Sammy, give 'em a break." Dean ran his hand through short hair, "They didn't know that they were brothers, it wasn't like with," his voice got hung on the last word. There wasn't an 'us' for them anymore. For them it'd been a means to an end right? They moved around too much and they were young and it didn't mean anything. Obviously, it didn't mean anything. After all, Sam had left for Stanford. Sam would've stayed if it meant anything. "All I'm saying is that it's hardly fair that you're judging them for this," he looked down at his hands.

Sam looked at his brother, actually looked at him for the first time in years. It still hurt how things had ended up between the two of them, hurt so much that he had buried it so deep he had began to think it was all in his head, fantasies of a messed up kid who had been clinging to the one damn constant in his life. "I'm not, I'm not judging them, Dean. It's just... how can I not look at them and see what happened? How can I not worry that Sam's gonna get his heart ripped out over this, gonna be so broken up that he'll never recover from it."

He stood, walking over to the window, looking out at the street, hoping that John and Mary would get back soon so he wouldn't have to have this conversation.  
\---  
Dean cupped Sam's face, "Not hurting me. God, Baby, feels incredible. Never thought, never knew how good it was gonna be." He moaned as Sam thrust into him, filling him, making him feel more loved than he thought was possible.

He ran his hands down Sam's back, fingernails leaving scratch marks along the muscled flesh, "God dammit, Sammy, fuck me harder, not gonna break. Wanna, wanna feel it."  
\---  
"I just hope, I just hope for Sam's sake that Dean doesn't chose his father over him. They may talk about how they can't go on without each other, but..."

Sam let out a breathy laugh at Dean's demands, but moved his hips back. He let out a lengthy moan when he pushed back in. How could he ever describe this feeling? There were no words to describe it, no art to show it, no noises to understand it, it was just sensation. Raw sensation. "Fuck Dean, you feel so," he hummed out the end of his sentence. Sam moved his hand to Dean's leaking cock and stroked it--maybe a little too fast and rough. "Dean, I've never, baby, nothing's ever felt like this," Sam was gasping for air, but there wasn't enough oxygen in the world. He could feel Dean clench around him with every thrust and stroke. Sam knew that he couldn't last long, not like this, it was all too tight and too warm and too much. "Fuck," he thrusted harder and more erratically, "I don't know how, mmm, how long I can," he moaned, kissing Dean, "last baby."

\---

"What Sammy?" Dean licked his lips, "They say they can't be without each other, but we all know that somebody's always real good at leaving? Is that what you're trying to say?" Dean stood up, feeling too angry. They weren't supposed to fight about this. It was stupid for them to fight about this. 

He watched Sam stand up too--obviously a little angered. "Because I feel like that's what you're trying to say and you don't get to say that about those kids," his voice escalated, "because they aren't us okay?" Dean turned away, not wanting to look at his brother, "Maybe in this life you don't leave," the words barely came out, just a whisper.

 

Sam turned and glared at Dean, "You think I wanted to go? You think I wanted to leave you and lose you? You have no clue what happened did you? Dad found out about us, Dad saw us together and made me go. I thought... I thought you'd come after me. I thought I meant enough to you that you'd follow me, that you wouldn't stay with him. He sent me away because I didn't follow his orders like a good little soldier, not like you. I told him, I told him that I wanted to be with you when he confronted me about us, and you know what he did? He filled out college forms, sent me away when all I wanted was to be with you. Don't even begin to think walking out that door wasn't the hardest thing I ever did."

Sam swallowed hard turning away, "I called every day for over a year, Dean. And not once did you return my calls, not once did you show me that you cared, that you gave a damn about me, so yeah, I'm worried about them, worried that he's going to have to go through what I did, because you told me so many damn times that it was forever. Guess forever wasn't as long as I thought it was going to be."

\---

Dean groaned, listening to Sam's words, listening to how undone his boyfriend was. Seeing how much this was affecting Sammy turned him on more than he thought was possible, "Don't care, want you to cum, God, wanna feel it, Baby. Love this, love how you make me feel, love you so damn much. Never giving you up, never. I can't... god I can't even begin to tell you how much you mean to me, Sweetheart."

\---

Sam felt Dean rest his hand on his shoulder and flinched at the touch, "Don't, please, Dean, don't. I can't... I can't go through this again. I can't start to feel things and have you walk away again, don't start, okay."

Sam started pumping Dean's cock as much as he could, he knew that he couldn't hold out much longer. "Fuck Dean, you feel so good, so good, wanna feel you cum around me, god, need to feel it," Sam was huffing out air and moaning probably a little too loud, but all he could think about was Dean. He gasped when he felt Dean start coming around him. Around him. "Fuck, fuck, fuck," and then Sam was gone. Lost again for the second time in less than 24 hours. He was pretty sure that he was almost shouting Dean's name at this point, but he wasn't in his right mind to care.

After a few moments it was over and Sam collapsed against Dean. "So good Dean," he mumbled, "love you so much." he could hear Dean's heart racing under his ear, "Good for you too?" Sam asked, hoping.

\---

"No, you do NOT get to turn this around on me Sam," Dean glared, "I meant what I said, I always fucking meant it. You left. You didn't have to," Dean was yelling, but it didn't matter. "Why'd you let Dad just shove you away huh? You go on and on about what a good little soldier I was, but you let him break us apart!"

Dean thought that he saw tears in his brothers eyes and it hurt him so bad. "I've wanted you every goddamned day since you walked out of our house. Why do you think I went and got you when Dad left? I fucking knew that you'd come along, I knew that you'd," Dean licked his lips, "That maybe we'd get another chance." He was up in Sam's face, having to arch his feet a little, and everything was hitting him too suddenly. All the years of want and need and desperation was all brought to the front of his mind because of two stupid teenagers--who were very obviously having sex and not even making an attempt at hiding it. "Dammit Sammy!" He shouted before grabbing his brother's face and pulling him into a kiss. It was too rough and out of practice and Dean couldn't care less.

He didn't even hear the door opening.

Of all the things that John and Mary expected to walk in on, seeing the angry, desperate kiss between two of their visitors hadn't even crossed their minds. 

Mary cleared her throat, "Where are the boys, gentlemen?"

Sam pulled away from his brother, still in shock at the kiss, shock and filled with a sense of longing and need he hadn't felt in years. "They went upstairs, the conversation got a bit intense and they... they left the room," Sam answered, sitting down on the couch, not meeting either John or Mary's gazes.

John walked to the bottom of the stairs, "Dean, Sam, get your butts down here, now."

\---

Dean groaned in frustration, too comfortable to move, but knowing if he didn't go downstairs his father WOULD come up and get him, and there were just some things his dad didn't need to see. He climbed out of bed, slipping on his jeans and t-shirt, neglecting to put on his boxers, as he figured he really didn't need them. He was sore, but not in a bad way, in a way that was totally good to him, one that spoke of Sam owning him.

He looked over as Sam dressed, thankful that he had just finished pulling on his t-shirt, because Dean realized, had Sam been less dressed than he was when he looked over, they wouldn't have made it downstairs.

Sam trailed half blissed out and half grumpily after Dean down the stairs. He looked at the older versions of them. They looked off. Both of their faces blushing and now they were avoiding eye contact, whereas before they had practically been staring at each other the whole time.

"Everything okay?" Sam asked facing his mom, but John was glancing between all four of the boys with an angry look on his face.

"Mary, I am sorry for the home intrusion," Castiel stumbled into the room, "I had no where else to go."

Castiel paused looking at his Sam and Dean knowing that something had changed. He didn't let the look linger, instead he looked back over at Mary and John. He was trying to help the two younger boys out, they were obviously in no state to be speaking of what had just happened. Castiel was always protecting the Winchesters...no matter what universe.

"Dean, grab your jacket, we're going home," John said, his voice quiet.

"No," Dean answered, glaring daggers at the man. "No, I am not leaving. You can't, you can't make me."

"Dean, this is for the best. This isn't right, what's going on here is wrong. Even you have to see that."

The elder Sam's eyes widened at that, 'even you, even you, what the hell did he mean by that'. "Even you? What was that supposed to mean?" he asked, trying to keep anger out of his voice, anger that he had never gotten a chance to voice with his own father.

"Stay out of this, this is between me and my son, not you."

"He does have a point, Dad. What the fuck did you mean by 'even you'? Hell I know I've always been a disappointment, but that, coming from you of all people, a man who's had his head stuck in a bottle for over 14 years, you really can't say shit about me. You did raise me after all."

John slapped Dean, the sound echoing in the living room. Before Dean could react to the slap, he saw Sam, both of them, going after the man.

"You son of a bitch," the older Sam said in a dark tone, "just because he's your kid doesn't give you the right to hit him, to treat him like he's worthless."

"Sam! Sam!" Older Dean shouted, "Both of you stop!" Everything in the room got quiet. "Everyone just fucking stop for a second."

You could hear a pin drop. Sam turned to Dean, touching over his cheek, checking him as though he'd just been shot.

"That's enough John," the named sounded weird on the man's tongue. He had been so used to calling him dad. "You need to sleep it off. That's not a request, that's an order." Older Dean's voice was firm.

"Boy, you have no right--" John's voice raised again.

"John!" Mary's face changed. Sam recognized that face. It was the face she made when Sam hadn't listened to her on a hunt, yeah, he knew that face really well. "Go home and get some rest," Mary reasoned, staring at him long and hard before John walked out of the house.

"Dean are you okay?" Sam finally choked out, once again brushing his hands repeatedly over Dean's reddening face. "I'm gonna kill him, I swear, I'm gonna kill him," Sam just kept muttering.

They all watched as John stormed out the door, Dean seeing the parallel to how he had stormed out of their house the day before. Dean shuddered, pulling his arms around himself, as if trying to disappear. 

The older Sam noticed the movement, and a big part of him wanted answers, wanted to know just what was going on in Dean's head. He wished he could ask, wished he could voice the concerns running through his head, because he knew that pose, he'd made it himself on more than one occasion, especially right before he had left for college. 

Mary sighed, running a hand over her face before talking, "Dean, is there anything you want to tell us? You don't have to, but... but it might be for the best if you get things off your chest."

Dean swallowed, hating the attention that was on him, shaking his head before running into the kitchen. 

Castiel gave the others a look, telling them that he would talk to the teenager, before turning and following him.

Dean sat with his head on the table, shoulders trembling with silent tears. He heard footsteps and looked up to see the angel walk in. He motioned for the man to sit, sighing a soul deep sigh. "So I guess you're gonna be the one to grill me for answers."

Castiel gave him a puzzled look, "I don't see how cooking you would do anyone any favors. I just wanted to talk to you."

Dean laughed, a bitter laugh that spoke volumes. "I'm a fuck up, always have been. I'm not, I'm not a good person, no matter what anyone thinks. God, Sam's the best thing that has ever happened to me, Sam makes me feel... makes me feel like I can do better, that I'm worth something."

Castiel knew that the young Sam was standing just outside the room, listening in. He wasn't surprised the boy was doing that though, the Winchesters always had an interesting view on privacy. Yet, he was the one always being scolded over personal space.

"Sam sometimes does that to people," Cas touched the boys shoulder and it almost threw him that his own handprint wasn't there. "You and Sam are awfully close." It was just an observation, but Dean nodded, arms still crossed defensively across his chest. "You know, the other Dean and Sam, my Dean and Sam, they're pretty close too. Seems to be a pattern with you Winchester brothers. Always too dependent on each other for your own good." He smiled at that thought.

Cas turned his head briefly to shoot a glance at the young Sammy. The boy didn't say a word, just continued watching. "Even when I had Mary separate you two, I knew you'd find each other." Castiel chuckled briefly, "Keeping you two apart this long has been hard."

The angel thought about how many times that Dean and Sam had almost met in this universe, fate drawing them together, and how hard Castiel had fought it for Mary's sake. But even an angel couldn't separate these two soulmates. They were too bound to each other--if only the other version of the boys could see that too.

"You don't have to talk to anyone if you choose not to," Castiel smiled, the Winchesters had been the ones to teach him that, "Although I think young Sam over there," he gestured to the doorway, "wouldn't mind hearing what you have to say."


	4. Desire and Pain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mentions of drug use and prostitution 
> 
> also innocent naive Castiel

Dean swallowed as the angel left the room, his heart beating a mile a minute. "What you did, Sam, you don't know what that means to me. You know me, know everything about me and still think I'm worth it, still think that I am worth more than I think I am. You give me hope."

He let himself be pulled into a hug, allowing himself to cry on Sam's chest. Sam just held him, running his fingers through Dean's hair, whispering words of love and devotion to him. Dean still couldn't believe sometimes how he had gotten so lucky to find Sam, Sam the only person who knew everything, knew each and every one of Dean's dark secrets. Sam who knew all the things that Dean hid from the world, who never once judged him for his past, who never once told him he was bad and wrong and dirty. Sam who had stood by him when things got bad, who had held him when his body wanted to shut down, when the temptation to go back to his old ways pulled at him, called him like a siren's song.

"Sammy, whatever happens, I'm never leaving you. You're my, you're my whole world, you've seen me at my worst and make me strive to be my best."

\---

Castiel walked back into the living room, nodding at the Winchesters and Mary, "The boys are talking, I think they'll need some privacy."

Mary showed Sam and Dean to the guest room, walking back into the living room to face Castiel. While she knew there were things he wouldn't, couldn't tell her, she hoped that there was something, anything he could say. 

Castiel seemed to know what was on her mind, "They're soulmates, Mary. This would have happened no matter when they would have met. Sam and Dean, every Sam and Dean, are so intertwined together that not even the powers of Heaven, nor the forces of Hell can ever truly separate them. Death couldn't even keep them apart."

\---

Sam wished that he had something to say, something that would make this all better, but he didn't. Instead he just held onto Dean tightly, stroking fingers through his hair. After everything, it was like Dean didn't see how Sam needed Dean as much as Dean needed him. Because Sam did need Dean, more than he could even manage to put into words. From the moment he met Dean, he knew that he was it for Sam. It should've felt insane to love him like that, but it didn't. Sam had waited for things to not feel right between them or for them to grow apart--for Dean to go back to his 'cooler' friends, but he didn't. Dean continued to stay even when things got rough, even when Sam couldn't tell him everything. Dean continued to stay by Sam's side.

"I love you," Sam whispered into Dean's neck. He pulled away, holding Dean's face in his hands. There were wet tear tracks and his face was red. "I mean I really. Love. You." Sam leaned in to kiss him, just barely brushing their lips.

\---

Dean watched Sam pace around the guest room. It barely took the giant three steps to make it across the room. Dean felt nervous; he hadn't done anything that reckless in a long time. Dean had refrained from it because he knew that Sam didn't, well, feel that way anymore. Sam had left and met Jessica--who Dean even liked for God's sake--and had a life outside hunting. Dean should've let him have it. Dean should've went off to look for their dad by himself. Of course, Dean had a tendency to not to the things he should.

"Look, Sammy," Dean stood up from the bed, "What I did earlier, that was," he took a breath, "That was out of line and I shouldn't have done it okay?"

When Sam turned to look at him, he couldn't read what was in those hazel eyes. Normally, he read his brother like a book, but this time he couldn't.

\---

"It's just not," Mary sighed, "How can it be okay?" Of all the people in the world, she loved Dean and Sam the most. She wanted what was best for them, which was why they were in this big mess in the first place. But here an angel was telling her that it was fine for them to be together? 

"It is not at their fault Mary," Cas put a comforting arm over her shoulders. Mary believed Castiel, she knew that he wasn't lying to her. Was the angel even capable of lying? Well, she almost laughed, he had been hanging around her sons for quite a while. She imagined Dean would've shown him how to lie properly by now. But he wasn't lying right now, she saw it in his eyes. She just didn't understand how her sons ended up being two halves to one whole--and who decided that was a good idea.

\---

Dean looked into Sam's eyes, looking into them as if seeing Sam for the very first time. He swallowed hard, leaning his head against Sam's. "Sam. I just, how could he say that? He's my father, he's supposed to love me and take care of me. And my whole life... my whole life I've just... just never been good enough. And for the last few months, I felt... I feel like I'm wanted and needed and good enough. Because of you, you and your, our, mom. You have no clue what that means to me, how much the two of you have saved me. I love you more than I thought I could possibly love another, it scares me sometimes, scares me how much you mean to me. Sometimes I can't sleep because I'm afraid I'll wake up and this has all been a dream. So... so I need you to promise me to always remind me that THIS is REAL, that WE are REAL. Because, sometimes... sometimes I just..."

Dean's words trailed off as he buried his face deeper into Sam's shoulder, his arms wrapped tightly around him.

\---

"Don't," Sam whispered, his heart breaking over Dean all over again, "don't you dare make me feel this again, and then apologize for it. You have no right, no right whatsoever to do this to me. I would have given up everything, school, a normal life for you. You don't get to say you were wrong for doing that. Do you know how much it broke my heart when I came back, watching you, watching how you'd flirt and hook up with pretty much anything with a pulse? Do you have any clue how hard it's been, being with you and being able to touch you, not being able to hold you like I want to. To know that the one good thing I ever had I can never have again in my life. It wasn't my fault, us ending... it wasn't my fault, I never wanted to leave, never wanted to leave you. I just... I didn't have a choice."

He turned away, sitting on the edge of the bed, holding his face in his hands, "You have no clue how I have to stop myself from... from throwing myself at you, begging you to just take me back, from crawling into your bed when you sleep, from calling out your name when I..."

\---

Castiel looked at Mary with a sad smile. "They would have been soulmates even if they hadn't been brothers. But if they weren't there was very little chance of them ever finding each other. This isn't your fault, it isn't theirs either, but they need each other. Mary, be glad that they met when they did, and not sooner. Remember when you almost came to this town 4 years ago, and 2 years before that? They would have been drawn together then, and it wouldn't, wouldn't have been right. They are so young now, but at least they are old enough to handle their relationship. It pains me that in order for them to have you in their lives that their relationship with John is fractured. If I could fix that I would, Sam and Dean are my friends, whatever version of them I meet. They showed me what it meant to make choices, to take a stand. You should be proud of them, proud of the men they will one day be."

\---

Sam held onto Dean, holding him as close as he could. He wanted to kill John. He was so angry with the man for everything that he had done to Dean. Sure, his mom had certainly put him through things that no human should ever have to do, but dammit, she loved him at least and showed him that she loved him. Why was it so hard for John to love his son? How was it so hard for John to love his son. Sam couldn't imagine how anyone couldn't help but love Dean. That charismatic personality, but sensitive core. That beautiful shell with a matching soul. The way Dean thought and looked and smelled and acted and talked and moved. Everything about Dean. How could anyone not find themselves wanting to worship him? Sam simply couldn't understand.

"He's an idiot for not loving you," Sam mumbled into Dean's hair, "Such a damn idiot." He held onto Dean tighter for a moment before pulling away to hold Dean's face, making sure that Dean was looking his directly in the eyes. "You are wanted. You are needed. And you are far more than just good enough Dean," Sam bit his lip, "Dean I promise that we're real. Fuck, if this is a dream, then you're not the only one dreaming it Dean." he brushed their noses close. "You saved me too you know," Sam kissed him gently, "You saved me too."

\---

Dean couldn't even stand to hear the end of that sentence. Dean couldn't stand seeing that look on Sam's face. Damn, it was just like when Sam left. It felt like that all over again and Dean wasn't going to let it be like that. Not this time. 

He didn't even mean to, his body just made the decision for him, but somehow he had Sam's lips pressed too roughly and too quickly against his. It knocked the breath out of him, but he didn't care. This time Dean wasn't going to wait for Sam to try and fix things. He was just going to take the lead, because it was Sam and he couldn't take it anymore. All this time just waiting and wanting, but never taking. No, Dean never took. He'd wait. He'd wait until he had somebody pressed up against the wall, gasping for him, and he'd close his eyes--thinking of Sam. He'd wait until somebody was ripping his clothes off and imagine what Sam's older, rougher hands would feel like. He'd wait until Sam was gone so that he could think about him. There wasn't anyone else that Dean wanted to imagine. There was only Sam.

\---

"Castiel," Mary glanced up at the angel, noticing how weary he looked compared to when they first met, "why did you help me? All those years ago, why did you come warn me? Why did you offer me an alternative?" Cas' eyes were calm, but piercing, just listening to her questions thoughtfully. "What was in it for you Castiel?" Mary's eyes continued to search for any hint of an answer in his face, but his expressions gave none. She would have to wait for his words.

\---

Dean looked into Sam's eyes, trying to understand why his boyfriend was saying that he saved him. "Sam, what do you mean..." he trailed off, as Sam took him by the hand, leading him out of the kitchen. They made their way silently towards Sam's room, and laid down on the bed, just holding each other tightly, clinging to each other as if they were the only things holding each other from falling apart. 

"You and me, forever, right?" Dean asked, placing a tender kiss on Sam's lips.

\---

Sam moaned into the kiss, his hands roughly grasping at Dean's hair, holding him in place. God, it felt like they had never stopped doing this, that it hadn't been almost a decade since their bodies had molded together in this manner. Sam ran a hand down Dean's back, shoving the fabric of his shirts up. He didn't want the kiss to end, but he needed to feel Dean's flesh, needed to touch and kiss and taste the man who had haunted his every waking and dreaming thoughts for years. "Dean, please..."

\---

"I needed to find a way to fix what was broken with them, I've watched them for so long, watched as they've been pushing each other away and it... hurts. Sam and Dean are my friends, and friends help each other, don't they? I am fond of them, and wanted them to be happy." Castiel looked Mary in the eyes, "I was not looking for anything out of it myself. I never had any motivation concerning myself with them."

\---

"Dean, I," Sam swallowed looking into green eyes, "I was gonna make a run for it," Sam dropped his head down low, "I didn't want to keep moving around like this and keep hunting. Do you know what it's like Dean? You never get to have any friends. You never get to go to football games. You never get the chance to not believe in monsters. Dean," Sam sighed, "You never get to leave this life. Once you're in, you're in." Sam glanced back up, watching the eyes that were watching him, "I just wanted a life and then Mom promised that we would stay here in this town for at least a little while you know? And see how I did," Sam smiled shyly, "And I met you Dean. I met you and she said we could stay and," Sam looked back down, "Suddenly, I didn't want to run away anymore."

\---

Dean pulled away yanking off his shirt--he was pretty sure some buttons abandoned ship at some point, but he could care less. "God Sammy, need you, need to feel you," Dean kissed his roughly, grinding into him, "been so long Baby Boy." Dean almost smirked at Sam's little shudder when he called him by that old nickname. "Need you so bad Baby Boy," Dean was sucking and kissing at Sam's neck. It had been so long. He felt like he was 22 again. Although Sam's body didn't quite feel the same. He was larger, stronger, he could tower over Dean. Yeah, things had changed a little.

\---

"I find it funny," Mary grinned, "that my boys taught an angel something." She was proud of the boys she had left behind such a long time ago, in a past life. She was even proud of the boys she had in this life. They were always her boys, her precious sons. The ones who could teach angels. Yes, those were her boys.

\---

Dean pulled Sam closer to his chest, placing kisses into the younger teen's hair. "You and me are something else, aren't we? Both of us so messed up. I'm not gonna let you run away," he sighed, "unless, unless it's with me. I can not begin to understand what it was like, what you went through before coming here, but I know that I'm nothing without you. I know that if you have to up and leave this very minute, I'm gonna be with you. You're everything." 

He held Sam close, enjoying the feeling of his love in his arms, not planning on doing anything but what they were. But his body had other ideas, his body always reacted so intensely when Sam was pressed up against him, and Dean found himself growing hard. He stifled a groan, but realized quickly that he wasn't the only one affected by the closeness, that Sam was reacting just as much as he was. 

"God, Sammy, it's like I'm addicted to you. Can't even just snuggle without wanting to strip you naked and make you moan my name in pleasure. Never been like this with anyone before. Never wanted anyone like you. It scares me sometimes, scares me how things would have been," he swallowed hard, remembering what Castiel had told him about making sure that he and Sam hadn't met when they were younger, "how things could have been if you had show up a few years ago. I don't think I could have lived with myself had you shown up any earlier, when you were too young for this, for us."

\---

"Oh, God, Dean," Sam moaned, shoving his brother flat on the bed. He leaned over him, still in awe at how different this was than what it used to be, and began trailing kisses along Dean's neck and shoulders. His hands ran along Dean's chest, fingers teasing at Dean's nipples. He sucked a mark on Dean's collarbone, smirking against the flesh as his brother arched up against him, begging him with every moan that slipped from his mouth.

Sam let his hands travel lower, cupping Dean's erection through his jeans, the familiar feel of it burning into Sam's hand through the denim. "Missed this, missed you so much, Dean. Haven't stopped wanting this, wanting you, only you. Have wished I could be this to you again, be your everything like I used to." His kisses moved lower, lips wrapping around one of Dean's nipples. He licked and bit gently at the flesh, the sounds of arousal spilling from Dean's lips fanning the flames of his own to levels he didn't think were possible.

Sam let out a startled yelp when Dean flipped them over, yanking his shirt off as Dean began to assault his chest with licks and kisses. Sam let out a curse when Dean undid the fly of his jeans, relieving the pressure on his aching cock, "God, Dean, yes. Need you so much, have always needed you."

\---

Castiel watched Mary intently, knowing what the others were up to and hoping that she couldn't hear it. "I think we should go outside for a while," he said quietly, trying to lure her away from the living room. "To talk, away from distractions." 

\---

Sam didn't even want to think about how things could've been--would've been--if Castiel had managed to keep them apart. "Stop talking," Sam kissed him, "about that." He kissed him again, rolling so he was straddling Dean. The familiar roaming of hands and entanglement of tongues was soothing, but only to Sam's mind, his body was reacting in other ways. "Dean, I, uh," Sam was blushing a little, "Wanna taste you." He wasn't used to talking like that--Dean was always the one with the demands and dirty talk. He saw Dean flick up an eyebrow, but the little smile he had encouraged Sam. "Need to taste you Dean," he kissed him, "Want to taste your cum," Sam tugged at Dean's shirt until the older boy sat up for him to pull it off. 

"Need it so much," Sam kissed his way down Dean's body, biting his skin where it v'ed above his jeans.

\---

"God Baby Boy," Dean groaned when he felt how hard Sam was, "S'been so long since I've seen you so needy," Dean kissed him again, letting their tongues slide and mold together. He couldn't believe how they still knew each other's mouths like the back of their hands even after all these years. "So beautiful Sammy," Dean murmured still stroking Sam through his boxers. "Love the way you moan," He grinned against Sam's neck when he heard another drawn out moan come from him. "Gonna let you take me Sam," He thrusted against his brother's thigh, and holy hell, they weren't going to last long. "After all those times I got to be inside you, I think you deserve a turn huh Sammy?" Dean was sure that his brother was trying to say yes coherently, although that wasn't anywhere close to what it sounded like. 

Dean pulled down Sam's boxers enough to see his pre-come shined cock. "It's gonna feel so good," he was whispering in Sam's ear, "Gonna be yours Baby Boy, just yours." He started pumping Sam faster, and just like the old days, Sam showed the same signs that he was close. "It's okay Baby Boy, wanna see you cum, want you to cum for me," Dean was doing everything he remembered Sam loving--and he remembered all of it. "Please Sam, cum for me, come on."

\---

Mary had an idea why Castiel wanted her to go outside, but she didn't object. They went out and sat on the porch, it was cool outside, the fall weather pleasant. 

\---

Dean moaned at Sam's words, his hands moving to rest on Sam's shoulders as he teased Dean's body. How was it that Sam could always, always make him so needy? It was if Sam had a manual on how to drive Dean wild and had studied it religiously. "Fuck, Sammy, so good, always so good to me," he moaned, tilting his hips upwards for Sam as the younger boy yanked at his jeans. God he was glad that he hadn't put his boxers back on, as as soon as they were removed he was naked for Sam. 

One of Dean's hands started carding through Sam's hair, nudging him towards Dean's aching cock. The feeling of Sam's breath on his hard length was making him tremble with want and need, "Come on, Sam, don't tease. Want it, wanna feel your mouth wrapped around me, wanna feel you swallowing me down. Gonna cum so hard for you, fill your mouth with my spunk, mmm, yeah want to feed you my cum, Baby. Suck me dammit," his last words were growled in a needy tone.

\---

Sam groaned against Dean's neck, his body feeling like it was on fire. He thrust up into Dean's hand, moaning as Dean worked his cock in familiar motions. No other lover Sam had ever taken could get him going so fast, could bring him to the brink so easily. And add Dean's words to his touch, those dirty words spoken in his rough voice, Sam was practically vibrating with need. "Dean, please, need you, need to cum for you. God, wanna... wanna cum for you. Want to be your good boy again, want..." whatever else he was going to say was cut off by a long low moan escaping his mouth. Dean had moved his hand just so, just the right way to short circuit Sam's already overwhelmed mind.

His body began to shake as Dean stroked him to the edge of release before stopping. Sam let out a whimper, "No, come on, Dean, please." Dean smirked down at him, his hand returning to it's previous movements, almost getting him there before stopping again and again. By the time Dean finally let him cum he was a quivering mess, and had shouted out Dean's name so loudly he was sure that the neighbors houses down had heard his scream.

\---

Castiel and Mary sat in comfortable silence on the porch, a blush spreading on the woman's face as a quite loud yell of Dean's name could be heard from inside. While they had both know what was going on instinctively, actually hearing it was another matter entirely. Castiel was puzzled at the reaction his body was having to the sounds, wondering what was causing him to start to feel... uncomfortable was the only word he could think of. His pants seemed to have shrunk, and he didn't know how to react to the sensation. 

\---

Sam smirked at how Dean growled. With the flat of his tongue, Sam swept across the tip of Dean's cock, catching the salty taste on his tongue. He moaned before sucking the tip into his mouth, tonguing at the slit. Sam could feel Dean's eyes on him, feel how intense they were just by how tightly Dean was holding Sam's hair. He slowed the swirl of his tongue and opened his eyes, looking up at Dean. Sam held their eye contact as he slid slowly down Dean's cock, rolling his tongue as he went. So, okay, Sam had been thinking about this for awhile. It wasn't that they hadn't done it before, but Sam wanted to perfect it. So, yeah, he'd been thinking about every little thing that could possibly make Dean crazy. 

He had to close his eyes to regain his focus. He was going to take Dean all the way, he'd never been able to before, but he wanted to. Sam wanted to be completely filled with Dean, taste nothing but Dean. Sam let out a breath through his nose and heard Dean gasp a little at the air contact. It encouraged him, the way Dean was making little noises. He continued sinking down, letting Dean hit the back of his throat.

\---

"Fuck Sam," Dean's eyes were wide and dialated, "so fucking hot when you cum for me, so good." He kissed Sam roughly, so needy himself. After watching Sam being on the edge over and over, Dean almost came without needing to be touched, but he'd held it. Dean needed to see Sam lose it first, and it had been completely worth it. "Almost made me cum just from watching you baby," Dean unbuttoned his own jeans, desperately grasping his own cock. "Love you so much Sammy, so fucking much."

\---

"Oh," Mary bit back a chuckle when she realized why Castiel's face was so strained. "You're um," she covered her mouth, holding in her laugh. She watched him blush. Who knew? An angel blushing. That was something she'd never witnessed. It was sweet. The poor guy.

\---

"Oh, God, fuck, Sammy," Dean moaned when Sam had him fully engulfed. Nothing had ever felt so damn good as the way the back of Sam's throat fluttered against his cock. "Where, God, Sammy, where'd you learn to do, do that?" He let out a groan of pleasure when Sam moaned around his cock, realizing that Sam was getting off on doing this to Dean as Dean was from receiving it. His fingers clamped into Sam's hair as he thrust into the willing mouth of his lover. 

He was close, so damn close to the edge when he heard his name, well the older Dean at any rate, being shouted out loudly. "Oh, fuck, Sammy, God, Sam," he started babbling, the words falling out of his mouth as Sam swallowed around him. Their eyes met, and the look of love he could see in Sam's eyes was enough to send him over the edge, screaming out Sam's name as he came.

\---

Sam shoved Dean's hand away, replacing it with his own, "Mine," he hissed, his mouth latching on to that one spot right behind Dean's ear that always made Dean tremble with need. His strokes were brutal and hard, the touches coming as if on autopilot, his hand jerking in fast pulls the way he knew Dean liked, "This is mine, Dean. No one else gets this, gets you ever again. I'm not sharing you, not with anyone. You're gonna cum for me, gonna cum all over my hand and then, then you're gonna get yourself all nice and stretched for me. Gonna fuck you so hard, Dean. Gonna fuck you so hard that you won't be able to walk straight for a week." He bit Dean's ear, blowing gently on the abused flesh, "You are gonna be my bitch, aren't you? Gonna beg for it, beg for my cock in your pretty little ass, gonna have you, the things I'm gonna do to you, Big Brother."

\---

Castiel knew that Mary wasn't being cruel with her laughter, but still didn't understand his reactions. Mary went inside briefly, coming back out with her purse and keys. When she held out her hand to him he accepted, following her towards her car. He understood her reluctance to stay by the house, understood that she might be a bit uncomfortable being around her sons while they were engaged in sex.

As they drove from the neighborhood, they passed John Winchester who was staring daggers in the direction of Mary's house. Castiel didn't know how long they drove, but it really wasn't that far. He looked outside the car, noticing they had pulled up outside a motel. Surely Mary wasn't asking him for that? His worries were lessened as she walked towards the diner across from the motel. He followed her inside, and ordered coffee as she did, watching the amused grin on her face.

\---

Sam swallowed hard around Dean's cock, feeling him cum inside Sam's mouth. He kept letting his throat flutter and swallow around Dean, until firm hands pulled him away. Sam gave a shy grin up at Dean, from the sounds of his, he thought he'd done all right. "Good?" Sam asked completely genuine. Sam palmed at himself, just trying to ease the ache a little. He'd gotten so turned on just by seeing Dean lose it. It drove him crazy to watch Dean like that, feel Dean like that.

\---

"Dammit Sammy!" Dean thrusted up into that perfect grip. When the hell did he start talking like that? There was no way Dean could've ever gotten him to say something like that when they were younger--and he'd certainly tried on several occasions. That timid voice just trying to say something to get Dean going--and it always worked like magic because it was Sam and Sam always got Dean going. This was a little different. He was nailing the dirty talk like a pro, Dean couldn't even think.

"S-S-Sam! Sam!" Dean's eyes widened before they snapped shut, his orgasm throwing his body into nothing but reaction and sensation. No one could ever make Dean feel like that, no matter how hard they tried, because this feeling was reserved solely for Sam. "Oh fuck," Dean gasped out, letting Sam milk him of everything he had. "Sammy," Dean whined as his flesh became too sensitive for contact. He let out a breath when Sam let him go. "Where the hell did you learn to talk like that?" he gazed at his brother wide-eyed despite the overwhelming urge to sleep.

\---

"So, uh," Mary's cheeks flushed a little, "feeling any better honey?" She looked over at Castiel and saw him almost make a face at the term of endearment. Maybe she should stick to first names only.   
\---

Dean pulled Sam up to rest against him, "Good? Good is an understatement, Baby Boy. God, the things you do to me. Have I told you that I'm gonna keep you forever? 'Cause I am. I'm never giving you up, Sam. Love you so damn much. When we're outta school, I'm gonna get us a house, gonna take care of you. Wanna get you a ring, let everyone know that you're spoken for, that you're mine, my Sam, my beloved Sammy. Do you want that, want everyone to call you my husband?"

Dean wasn't sure where the words were coming from, but he knew he meant every single one of them.

\---

Sam grinned, pulling Dean against his chest, "You think I haven't spent the last how many years thinking of what I'd say to you given a chance to be with you again? God, I've wanted this for so long, so damn long, Dean. Should have... should have done this sooner. Should have made you mine again sooner. Never letting you go. Gonna get you a tattoo that says 'Property of Sam Winchester' on that hot ass of yours. Never gonna let anyone else touch you, Baby. You belong to me."

\---

Castiel wasn't sure what he was feeling when Mary called him 'Honey', the term of endearment made parts of him feel... odd. Almost as odd as his body’s reactions to the sounds that had driven them from her house. He still wasn't sure of how to answer her about his motivation concerning the boys, concerning Sam and Dean. "I'm not sure. This situation is... confusing to say the least."’

\---

Sam practically leapt into Dean's body, kissing him roughly on the mouth. "Yes, yes, yes." He mumbled between kisses. "Love you so much Dean," more kisses. He rutted against Dean, more desperate than ever. Dean just told him forever. Like. Married forever. Sam's head was spinning and he couldn't breathe. It was all too much and too little. Dean. HIS Dean. Wanted Sam. Just his ol' self. Forever. "Never want you to leave me, ever Dean, please, please never let me," Sam knew that the kisses were sloppy and too needy, but he couldn't stop himself. He could almost feel tears, and then he could feel tears. He'd never been this happy.

\---

"Only if you get a matching one Baby Boy," Dean smirked and kissed his brother lazily. They hadn't just laid beside each other in so long. He hadn't had his Sammy in his arms for too long. Everything had been too long and never enough. He breathed Sam in, appreciating the scent of him. His Sammy.

"You're being serious though right?" Dean looked over into hazel eyes, "Not about the tattoo, but I mean, the other parts." Dean cleared his throat, he didn't like having these kind of talks, but he didn't want Sam to leave him again. He couldn't handle having this taken away from him again.

\---

"I can see where it would be a little confusing," Mary offered a kind smile, understanding that the angel was probably feeling way over his head. "You know, um, I am a mom," she took a sip of her coffee, "You can, if you want, we could talk about it." She could feel herself blushing, she didn't mean too.

\---

Dean smiled into the kiss, only pulling back long enough to kiss the tears off of Sam's face, "Don't cry, Sweetheart. I hate it when you cry, it makes me feel, feel like there's something I need to fix. I promise you, Sam, I am never gonna leave your side as long as I can help it. You and me, that's the only thing that matters."

He flipped them, pinning Sam to the bed. "Mmm, God, Sam, you are so sexy, you know that? Gonna make you scream, you're mine. Gonna get you a ring, gonna do that soon. Want everyone to see it, want everyone at school who watches you, wanting you, to know that they can never have you." 

Dean kissed a path down Sam's body, hands running along the hot flesh. His tongue snaked out at Sam's navel, dipping in briefly. He grinned as the muscles of Sam's abdomen rippled under his touch. "So sexy," he breathed against Sam's skin, his hands gripping at Sam's thighs, shifting them apart. "Gonna rock your world, Lover."

He dropped his head, engulfing Sam in one fell swoop, causing the other boy to arch off the bed. He set a quick pace, licking and sucking and every so often nibbling Sam's straining flesh. He pulled back a bit, until only the head was still in his mouth, teasing the sensitive tip with his tongue. 

\---

Sam smiled, running his fingers through Dean's short hair, "Yeah, I meant every word. You're mine, I can't, won't give you up again. I think, I think it would kill me. And yeah, I'll get a matching tattoo. Want everyone to know I'm as much yours as you are mine." 

He looked into Dean's eyes, dropping the mask he usually wore around him, the mask to cover his true feelings. "Dean, you're everything. If I could go back, if I could have told you the truth, why I was leaving I would have. I'm not losing you, not again. We've been through too much, we've literally been through Hell, I can't do this without you."

Sam pulled Dean tighter against him, their legs intertwining. Both men were exhausted, both emotionally and physically. Before they fell asleep Sam needed to say something, though. "Don't be surprised if I wake you up in the middle of the night, Dean. Need to get some rest, but later... mmm, later that sexy ass of your's is all mine." He grinned when Dean chuckled in his ear, slipping into the first restful sleep he had had in years.

\---

"It's a biological response, that much I do understand. Why it happened, that is what confuses me," Castiel answered, looking down at his coffee as if trying to figure out what to do with it. "I don't understand why my body reacted to those sounds. Sam and Dean are my friends, why would them finding happiness make me feel the way I felt?" He gave Mary a puzzled look.

\---

Sam meant to moan out Dean's name, but it came out as one long sound instead. Dean had just taken all of him and Sam was already so close. He wasn't going to last long, not like this. "I'm gonna...Oh Dean, I'm gonna!" Sam attempted to warn his boyfriend, but that was all he could get out before he came. He couldn't believe how Dean could just swallow him down like that, just the thought made his cock give a half hearted twitch of interest.

"Dean," Sam breathed out, his chest heaving a little. His fingers ran through Dean's hair once more lovingly. When Dean crawled up to snuggle against him, Sam just felt happy. Nothing but happy. "It's gonna be us forever," Sam said less like a question and more like a statement, but still glanced over at Dean to see his reaction.

Sometimes he still couldn't believe that someone like Dean would ever give him a second look, let alone most of his looks. Dean was amazing.

\---

"Sam, I'm sorry," Dean shoved a little closer to his brother, making sure that he could feel his every breath, "I should've handled things different back then. I was just, damn, I just was too angry, too young, and too stupid." He chuckled, but he meant what he said.

He noticed Sam entangle their legs a little more, a small loving gesture. Dean had missed that. He had missed the way Sam always cuddled after, it had always been an inevitability. Dean was happy that some things didn't change.

\---

"Well, sometimes hearing people...you know," Mary felt a little awkward discussing this with a grown man...grown angel. "It can be stimulating." She cleared her throat, "But however you reacted, it's completely normal. You know that right?" She asked genuinely. "There's nothing to be ashamed about." She didn't really know if he was ashamed, but just in case he was.

\---

Dean held Sam until they both fell asleep, his hands running up and down the younger boy's back. In his dreams he saw them together, sitting on the front porch of a house, laughing as they watched the sunrise. He awoke sometime later, the house was quiet and he was thirsty. He slid on his boxers, making his way downstairs, and sleepily walked into the kitchen. He had just grabbed a glass to fill with water when he heard movement behind him.

Dean spun around to see his father sitting at the table. The man wore an angry expression on his face, rage and hurt and pain etched into his features, "Dean. I thought I told you to come home, and what did you do? You stayed here, doing unspeakable things to your little brother. You're sick, Dean. A freak, a pervert. I should have had you locked up when I found out about the things you did, rather than try and help you. Rather than let you roam free. Does he know, does he know about you selling yourself for drug money? Does your BROTHER know that you're a whore, Dean? A filthy drug addict whore, whose only talent is putting out?"

Dean flinched at the words, hanging his head in shame, "You don't bring him up, you have no right."

John laughed, it was a bitter, evil laugh, "Oh I have all the rights in the world, I am his father after all."

\---

Sam woke, and was about to wake Dean, to show him how much he meant to him, when something drew his attention out of the room. He slid on his jeans, and slowly crept his way to the door. He felt more than heard Dean coming behind him, and silently made his way towards the kitchen. He could hear John's voice, but something was off about it. As if it really wasn't John speaking. As if...

He looked over at Dean, noticing his brother mouthing a question at him, 'Demon?'

\--- 

Dean tried to pull away as his father grabbed him by the arm sharply. "Let go of me," he bit out in pain.

John laughed again, that laugh that so didn't belong to Dean's father, "Mmm, no. You're gonna show me what you're good for, aren't you, Son?"

Dean's eyes widened, fear and shock overtaking him.

\---

Sam stirred a little in his sleep, noticing that Dean was no longer beside him. He opened his bleary eyes, rubbing at them, and took a quick look around the room. "Dean?" He mumbled out the question, sleep still veiling his voice. He noticed that Dean's boxers were gone and figured that he had gotten up.

As Sam was about to lay back down and nod off again, he heard it. It was John's voice, a little too loud. Sam tugged on some sweat pants and hurried downstairs, no way was John doing anything. Sam froze when he saw the other Sam and Dean sneaking towards the kitchen. He stared at them, and then listened to what John was saying.

Sam paused, even John--drunken, mean John--wouldn’t say those things. And surely those things weren't even true. Dean would've told him those things. Dean told him everything. And that wasn't John's voice...not quite.

He caught the other mens' eyes. Demon. It was a demon.

Sam knew how to hunt just as well as any hunter, and to say that this house was well-equipped with hunting items was an understatement. Sam snuck over to the closet in the hall, gesturing for the other Sam and Dean to follow. Quietly, he tugged back the coats and handed the men a couple squirt guns. And okay, maybe squirt guns with holy water was a little childish, but it worked efficiently and they didn't have much time for anything else.

They stalked their way up to the kitchen doorway, listening to the demon's cold words. Sam knew the demon wouldn't get too far, his mom had already covered the ceilings with devil's traps. You'd be surprised how well they work even when they're the same paint color as the ceiling.

\---

Dean tried pulling his wrist from his father's grasp, there was something not quite right about the whole situation. His dad might say shit, but he had never once laid a hand on Dean. And the things coming out of his mouth, the words pouring out of him, things that weren't talked about, things that they had agreed to never speak of ever again. Tears swelled in Dean's eyes, the pain from his wrist radiating up his arm. "Dad, please. Stop, this isn't you, you don't want to do this."

His eyes drifted over his father's head to where Sam, and the older Sam and Dean stood, each male holding a water pistol of all things. The minute Sam fired his at John the man roared in pain, smoke curling off of him and his eyes changing color. The yellow tint drew Dean's attention for a brief second, but he quickly moved away as his father, no obviously not his father, let go of his wrist in pain.

Dean moved quickly, running behind Sam and the Winchesters, holding his bruised and swollen wrist against his chest painfully. 

\---

Sam swallowed hard when the demon turned to face them. His eyes, god the demon had yellow eyes. The only demon Sam or Dean had seen with yellow eyes was Azazel, the bastard who had killed their mother, the bastard who was responsible for Jessica's death, for their father's death. Sam watched as Dean backhanded the demon, lashing out with pent up anger. The demon rose from the floor and started walking their way, only to be stopped by the hidden devil's trap.

\---

When Castiel and Mary pulled into the driveway they instantly knew that something was wrong. Castiel could feel the presence of a demon, and raced into the house, Mary close at his heels. He noticed how the younger Dean was cradling his hand, the wrist obviously damaged greatly, and could hear Sam starting an exorcism rite. He pushed past them, calling upon his grace to smite the demon inhabiting the man. 

When John fell to the floor he knelt over the prone figure, feeling for a pulse. The man had one, so Castiel turned towards the hunters. He walked in silence to Dean, knowing that the boy was terrified. He had only learned the supernatural was real less than a day ago, and coming across a demon wearing the face of his father had to be a traumatic experience. "May I?" Castiel asked, motioning at Dean's wrist. The teen simply nodded, and Cas summoned enough power to heal the wound. 

"I believe that you should all rest. I'll make sure that John is secured, just in case he tries anything without the assistance of the demon."

\---

Dean let himself be ushered up to Sam's bedroom in silence. While his wrist was no longer causing him pain, he was far from fine. The demon had dredged up the worst things it possibly could to hurt Dean, to make him suffer. He shuddered at the thought of what would have happened if the others hadn't awoken in time. Images raced through his mind, images of the demon wearing his father's face using him, taking what belonged to Sam. He curled up in a ball, trying to make himself as small as possible, letting out a sob of relief when he felt Sam curl around him, holding him tightly.


	5. Darkness and Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Secrets are unearthed and connections are revealed

Sam could tell that Dean wasn't okay. It killed him to watch Dean become as small as possible in the middle of Sam's bed; he could see the shaking of his shoulders and knew that the boy was crying. Quietly, Sam edged onto the bed beside him and wrapped as much of his body around Dean as he could. He held on tightly, trying to wish this all away. He never wanted it to be like this. It had been hard enough to tell Dean about all the things that were out there, let alone have to watch him face it like this. Sam nuzzled against Dean's neck.

"Dean, I'm so sorry," he murmured, pressing a comforting kiss on his neck, "I'm so sorry, that should've never happened to you. Should've never let that demon touch you, so sorry Dean, I'm so sorry." Sam wedged his hand through the center of the ball that had become Dean and grabbed onto his hand, intertwining their fingers.

\---

Dean stared down at his father lying on the floor. He hadn't listened to Castiel telling him to go rest, he couldn't listen. John was still, his body having gone through such extreme stress. So maybe Dean didn't like the man in this universe, but possession by a demon isn't something Dean would wish on his family. He looked at Castiel--who was staring intently at John, waiting and watching. 

"You think the demon was telling the truth?" Dean leaned back in his chair, "About the boy? About...this version of me?" He chewed on his bottom lip wondering what could've possibly went so wrong in this universe. Wasn't this supposed to be the good one? Wasn't his and Sam's lives supposed to be better this time around? "I mean, you've been watching over them," Dean locked eyes with the angel, "What happened to these boys?"

Dean turned in Sam's arms, pressing his face against Sam's shoulder. "It's not your fault, Sam. Not your fault. I was, I was gonna come in contact with this sort of thing eventually, right? Hunting is a big part of your life... so it's part of mine, Baby. Don't blame yourself for what it did, not your fault. You're good, and pure, and I love you more than life itself. You keep me grounded, keep me sane, Sammy. Don't punish yourself for what the demon did. I can't bare to see you upset, please, Sweetheart, it wasn't your fault."

\---

Castiel looked at Dean sadly, "I wasn't able to always be here, to make sure nothing bad happened. I regret that there are things I couldn't prevent." He looked between Sam and Dean, trying to apologize for his failure. "I wasn't here when it began, and Dean hid his actions so well that I didn't know of them until recently." He sighed, "At the time when things could have been happening, I was splitting my time between helping you, and preventing Mary and Sam from coming here. I knew... I knew if they were to meet before Sam was old enough that things would transpire that neither of them could live with as they grew up."

"Had I allowed Sam to come here when he was 8 years old, 10 years old, and their connection established then... I couldn't allow that to happen."

\---

Sam stared at the angel, lightly tapping his hand on Dean's knee, "The things the demon said, were they true? Did Dean... did he do those things?" 

\---

"Sam, I'm sorry, I am so so sorry I'm not good enough. You are so perfect, deserve someone better than me. And yet, and yet you cling to me as much as I cling to you. I wish... I wish I hadn't done what I did, that I was pure, like you. And I understand... I would understand if you decided to leave me... I'm not a good person, I try to be, but I've done... the things I've done."

Dean took a shaky breath, turning his head away so he could speak without seeing what he thought he would see in Sam's eyes, judgement and disappointment, anyone else would be giving him those looks after he said what he was going to say, but part of him knew that Sam would never think that of him. "It started when I was 13. I had messed up my knee pretty badly playing football and the doctors gave me these pills. Not quite sure what they were, but the rush, the high they gave me were unlike anything I had felt before in my life."

"Soon after, I was hording my pills, keeping them not for when I was in pain, but to get high off of. It was the first time in my life that I had actually felt anything other than emptiness. But soon, my prescription ran out and I was out and I needed more. God knows my dad didn't make the kind of money where I could take some from him to try and buy more. There was this kid, he doesn't live around here anymore, but this kid had the pills, could get them, and told me... told me he'd give them to me in exchange..."

Dean's voice trailed off, "I was so desperate that I agreed. And that one time became two and then three and then I have no clue how many. And then one day he introduced me to this friend of his, told him... told him how good I was... that I would do anything. I was so out of my mind at that point, I'm not quite sure what all happened, all I know is that I woke up bruised and bloody, with a pile of cash at my feet. And that friend told another who told another and by the time I was 16 I was so broken that I figured... I figured that no one would care what I did."

"Dad found me three weeks later... in a ratty motel room, so beaten up that you could barely see my face. I almost OD'd and Dad, Dad took me to get help. This friend of his had a place out in the middle of nowhere where I could come down off of the crap running through my system. It was the worst month and a half of my life. Bobby has this sealed room in his basement, where I stayed the entire time I was detoxing. It was painful, and by the time it was done I felt empty."

"By the time I was clean it was a couple weeks before my Junior year was about to begin. I... I've been clean ever since, but that emptiness, it consumed me, Sam, it ate at me until I met you. So, yeah, what it said was true. I am everything it said I was, and probably more. I know I'm a freak, I know that I shouldn't want you the way I do knowing that you are my brother... is it bad that finding that out just made me want you more? That knowing we share everything, even our DNA, made me fall even harder for you?"

Dean turned to face Sam once more, "I told you there were thing from my past that could destroy us, and you agreed to let me have my secrets. I... I love you, and it was killing me not to tell you, to keep this from you. I know the only reason you kept hunting from me was to keep me safe and I understand that. This, this was my last secret I held from you. I'm sorry for what I did, for what I am, and I hope... I hope that you can bring yourself to still love me."

\---

Sam and Dean both stared at the angel, awaiting an answer. "He did, didn't he?" Dean caught Cas' eyes, "That's why you don't want to tell us." The only thing keeping Dean was losing it was Sam's fingers still rubbing little circles on Dean's thighs--keeping him grounded.

"I could only interfere so much," Castiel gave a disappointed sigh, "there were things I couldn't change. Certain things aren't determined by me, they're determined by fate."

"That's bullshit," Dean shook his head, "What about free will? Huh?"

"He still had to be you Dean," Cas' voice got louder.

"What?" Sam and Dean spoke simultaneously.

"You're not allowed to change the make up of a person. This kid, he still had to be you," Castiel gave a sympathetic look, "He had to be somewhat--"

"Damaged," Dean bit his lip, "He had to be damaged didn't he."

It got quiet, and there was Dean's answer. Even in the reality where life was supposed to be better, he still had to be messed up. But why? Why couldn't there be at least one version of him who got to be happy for longer than a few minutes? What the fuck was so wrong with that idea? Honestly, Dean would really like to know that.

"What about Sam? Shouldn't he be...you know," Messed up too? Dean didn't add that though, just caught Sam's eyes. He didn't need to say it.

"You shouldn't make assumptions about young Sam, he's had plenty of," Cas thought for a second, "obstacles."

\---

Sam listened to Dean's words painfully. It hurt him to hear those things. It didn't hurt him because Dean had done them, it hurt because Dean had to go through them. He couldn't stand the thought of anyone else touching Dean, let alone touching him like that. For that. He knew how addictions went, it wasn't like he'd never seen another person with one--wasn't like everyone didn't have something or another that they were addicted to. Sam understood why Dean did the things he did, he understood how hard that had to have been. 

It killed him that Dean wouldn't look him in the eyes, like he thought that Sam wouldn't love him anymore. If only Dean knew that nothing could be farther from the truth. Nothing was ever going to make Sam not love him anymore. Not ever. Not anything. Dean was his and he was Dean's. There was no other way that Sam would even consider it being. Honestly, he couldn't even think about how he had went through things before Dean. He hated to think about himself before Dean. That mindset wasn't him anymore, he was different not, better because of Dean. Dean had a way of making everything better--always. Sam didn't care about Dean's past--not as far as judgement went anyways--all he cared about was that Dean was right there with him now. All the secrets, he knew why Dean kept them. Dean kept his secrets for all the same exact reasons that Sam managed to always keep his own.

"Dean, I'm never gonna stop loving you," Sam took the boy's hand, knowing that Dean still was too unsure to look at him. "It doesn't matter what happened back then okay? You're perfect to me Dean." Sam rubbed familiar circles on Dean's palm. "You should've never had to go through that, they should've never taken advantage of you," Sam shifted his body a little closer to Dean's. "It's not your fault Dean, it's not your fault. You didn't. You were. It wasn't you making those decisions, it was your addiction." He stared at Dean, hating that he was still turned away. 

"Dean," Sam whispered, "please look at me." He placed his fingers under Dean's chin, guided his face to look at Sam, "I love you. Forever. I mean it." Sam smiled at his softly, almost unnoticeably. "Nothing's ever gonna change that. Not for me." He kissed Dean gently, just a quick brush of lips. "You can tell me anything, whenever you're ready. Doesn't matter how big or little."

\---

Sam stared at his hands, part of him wanting to scream out in rage at what the younger version of Dean had had to go through, the other part of him wanting to go upstairs and pull the teenager into his arms and tell him that everything would be alright. He glanced over at Dean, knowing that similar thoughts were going through his head. Sam didn't know everything, didn't know the particulars, but knowing that in order for Dean to be Dean he had to have been damaged, it made him want to cry. 

He noticed the look in Dean's eyes, and they shared a silent conversation, deciding on how they were going to deal with the fallout, deal with the damage that had been done to the boys.

\---

Dean let out a shaky laugh, letting out the breath he didn't know he was holding. "Sammy, I lied to you, told you you were the first to... the first one I had ever had touch me in certain ways. I just... I wanted to be good for you, pure for you. You mean the world to me, the fact that you still trust me after this... it boggles the mind. I know in my mind and heart and soul that you mean what you say... but there are small parts of me that doubt I will ever be good enough."

He ran his hand along Sam's back, "I'm good though, clean. I made sure... made sure to have my self checked out after... after I got clean. I just want a fresh start, clean slate, and you... you give me that everyday. You make me feel pure... good... clean in a way I don't think I ever felt before in my life. You have no clue what you mean to me. I know I tell you how much I love you, I do, but I wish you could feel what I feel, not as a replacement for your emotions, but so that you would just... know." 

He paused, eyes widening and a smile coming to his face. He reached down to his hand, pulling his class ring off of his finger, "I know this is nothing special, I intend on getting you a nicer ring, Baby, but... but until then, I want you to have this, to wear this, if even just on a chain around your neck, to show that you are mine, to show that I intend to marry you... make you mine forever."

\---

Castiel watched the men exchange glances, and while he was pretty sure he knew what had changed between them, it didn't stop him from asking. "You two are different," he observed. It made him want to smile when both of their faces turned red. Sam pulled his hand off of Dean and stared down to the floor. Dean looked out the window in the kitchen. Castiel liked them better like this, liked them better together. They were his friends and he enjoyed when they were happy. They were always happy if they had each other.

"Dean?" a muffled voice came from the floor. John shifted a little, trying to sit up. Immediately, Sam and Dean helped him from his laying position. He looked like he'd just been thrown out of a truck.

"John, you all right?" Dean asked, once again feeling weird to say John instead of Dad--but he knew that this wasn't his dad, not really.

\---

"Oh," Sam's eyes got wide when Dean held out his class ring, "but you--you love your ring." Dean just smiled and continued holding it out. Sam gingerly picked up the ring, rolling it in his fingers. "Dean, I don't know what to say," Sam bit his lip. He grinned when Dean pulled out Sam's hand, holding it on his own, and slid the ring on his finger. Sam was surprised that it fit. Then again, the poor kid was like a puppy. All paws that weren't quite grown in to. 

Dean leaned in to kiss him, but Sam stopped him. "Dean, I want you to know that--that I don't care if I wasn't your first." Sam's thumb absentmindedly twisted the ring around his finger. "As long as I get to be your last," he grinned, letting Dean kiss him.

Sam wondered if maybe now was a good time to talk to Dean about some things, but Dean's mouth was rather distracting. Dean's hands were also distracting. Dean's arms gently lying him back on the bed was distracting too. Dean straddling his hips, yeah, that made it rather hard to focus on much.

\---

John pulled himself from the floor with a groan, moving to sit in one on the kitchen chairs. He ran a hand over his face tiredly, blinking as he took in his surroundings. "What happened, when did I get back here?" he asked looking at them with puzzled glances. 

Sam swallowed hard, "What's the last thing you remember?"

John looked at the others, thinking hard about the answer to that question, "I was heading home to cool down from the argument with Dean. I know I shouldn't have slapped him, I've never raised my hand in anger to that boy before in my life, but everything was too much. I was planning on calling a little later, and then I was coming to on the floor. What happened?"

Sam shared a look with his brother and Castiel, trying to think of a way to explain what happened to the man.

\---

"Mmm, Sammy, God, you have made me the happiest guy on the face of the planet, you know that?" Dean whispered, kissing Sam right behind his ear, in that little spot that always got Sam trembling with need. "My Sam, my fiance," he whispered the word in a husky voice against Sam's ear. "Gonna be your only, Baby Boy. Gonna be so good for you, make you never want anyone else."

The was a semi-manic quality to Dean's voice, as if he was trying to bury his feelings of hurt and worry and anger and fright with lust, with love. It was something that he did, not consciously, but as a defense mechanism. "Can't believe you said yes, wanna tell everyone, wanna show everyone that you're mine, that no one but me can ever have you. Wanna let all those people who watch you know that they can't touch, can't have, that you chose me, me of all people."

One of Dean's hands snaked its way into Sam's hair, gently pulling the younger teen's face towards his, forcing their lips to meet. Dean moaned against Sam's lips, his other hand running across Sam's chest as he rocked his groin into Sam's, their cocks rubbing against each other through layers of denim. His hand had just reached the waistband of Sam's jeans, fingers about to pop the button open when a knock sounded at the door.

Dean growled with frustration, flopping off to the side of Sam, panting harshly, one hand covering his face, covering tears he hadn't known he was crying from public view. Only Sam was allowed to see him that vulnerable. 

\---

Castiel, Sam, and Dean all looked back and forth between each other. How exactly were they supposed to explain this one? Castiel thought for a moment, seeing the emotions on the other men's faces, perhaps they were not in a good position to speak to John about these things. Obviously, there was still anger there, he could sense it. Then again, when it came to John Winchester, Sam and Dean always had a little bit of anger. It was something of a family tradition--but not in a traditional family sense.

"Sam, Dean, you could go check on the boys if you would like," Cas offered, "I could try and explain this particular process to John--if that would make it easier."

Sometimes, Sam and Dean loved Cas more than they cared to admit. Now would be one of those times. It wasn't that they hadn't had to explain these types of things a thousand times over, but they'd never once had to explain it to their father. The thought of explaining demons to John seemed otherworldly--which made sense Dean supposed. "That'd be good Cas," Dean nodded, "The other, uh, Dean could probably use a talk." Sam nodded in agreement to his brother. 

When they left the room, Castiel took a seat across from John. He could see the exhaustion in the man's face. Castiel had seen what the man had been through, who he'd become over the years. From what he'd observed, Castiel didn't like this man. He didn't agree with the way he acted and lived his life. However, he was a Winchester and Cas was always willing to help.

"You were possessed by a demon," he started out simple, straight to the point.

"I was what?" John frowned.

"Demons are the minions of Hell," Possibly the best description that Castiel could come up with, "One of them took over your body. It must have happened while you were walking home. Do not worry, your actions were completely not your own once the demon had used you as a vessel."

John stared at him, slightly dumbfounded. Castiel wondered what part of his description wasn't clear enough, but perhaps it was just the situation. Humans did tend to be emotional creatures over these sort of things. 

"What happened while I was...while I was possessed?" John's eyes finally met Castiel's.

\---

Sam heard a knock on the door, groaning slightly at Dean rolling off of him. Was now really the best time? "Come in," Sam answered to the knocking. He was assuming that it would be his mom coming in. Maybe she would tell them to try and get some rest or maybe she would just want to talk to them and make sure they were okay. However, we wasn't expecting the other Sam and Dean to come in. Older Sam seemed a little too big to be in Sam's room. Although, Sam found himself hoping that was how he would eventually turn out. It looked a lot better than the too long, too skinny thing he had going on at the moment. Not to mention the totally disproportionate hands and feet. Sometimes, Sam really did feel like a puppy. It irritated him.

"How're you two holdin' up?" the other Sam was the first to speak. Sam could tell that there was something bothering the other Dean. He wondered if they'd heard what the demon had said about Dean. He wondered if they were judging him.

"Fine," Sam answered...himself? Talking to this Sam and Dean was so awkward...

"What about you?" the other Dean locked eyes with his Dean. They gave an intense stare for a moment, almost like they were reading each other's minds...or at least trying to.

"As well as can be expected, considering the circumstances," Dean said with a sigh, pulling one of the pillows across his lap. He ran his fingers through his hair, not quite making eye contact with the hunters. "It's just a lot to take in, the last day and a half have been like hell. God, and we have school tomorrow, this has been one stress filled weekend, huh, Sammy?" he turned to face his Sam, feeling more comfortable when Sam's face was the only thing he could see. 

On top of everything, finding out about his mother, about demons, having his darkest secrets outed, watching these two older versions of himself and Sam was one of the hardest things he had to deal with. He felt guilty every time he would look at the elder Sam, picturing himself in bed with the larger man. While it was true that that was what his Sam would quite possibly look like when he was older, at the moment there was a striking difference in their sizes, and Dean felt like he was cheating on Sam, on his fiance, in his head.

He reached out his hand, intertwining his fingers with Sam's, thumb playing with the ring on his finger. He grinned, his heart beating just a tiny bit faster at the sight.

The older Sam watched how the younger Dean reacted to himself and Dean, confused why the young man refused to make eye contact with them.

\---

"No, I didn't do that to him. I couldn't have," John said with a soft cry, in response to the angel telling him what the demon had been saying.

Castiel looked sharply at him, noticing real tears falling down the man's face, perhaps he had judged the man a bit harshly. "My question is this, John Winchester, why did you treat him the way you did before you were possessed? He feels like he isn't worth anything, that is how you have made him feel."

John flinched as if he had been slapped across the face.

\---

Sam sat down on the foot of the bed, watching the teenagers closely. His instinct was to protect them, to pull them into his arms and never let them go, but he stayed still. "Dean, you can't bury this, it's just going to eat away at you, keeping things hidden just... it kills a part of you, slowly over time, until all you are left with is a hollow ache where it was."

Dean watched the way his brother crouched down to speak to the boys. He saw the way he looked directly at Dean and it made something in him click. He'd never seen the way his brother had looked at him from an outsider's point of view. It had always been from his own eyes. Somehow, this changed things. He saw that look in Sam's eyes that hadn't been there in so long. He looked like a young boy again, the one who admired Dean so much and yet Dean never felt like he deserved it. The one who Dean always called on his mistakes, but was still the one Sam sought out for comfort. Suddenly, he felt like the Dean who was sitting on the bed.

He glanced over at the younger Sam, who was still holding onto the hand of his own Sam. He wondered what Castiel had meant about the kid having his own obstacles. He wondered what it was that made those eyes not quite look like his Sam's. 

"I know maybe this was all a little," Dean started, trying to offer some comfort to the boys, "overwhelming. And I know that Sam and I aren't exactly familiar in a way, but you know," Dean's voice somehow lost his words. Who was kidding? This whole comforting thing wasn't exactly up his alley. 

\---

Sam watched the Dean looked at the older Sam, seeing that familiar gleam. It made his chest shrink in a little. He knew that he shouldn't be jealous of himself, but he sort of was. Not that he had any room to judge, the other Dean wasn't exactly unappealing. This Dean had grown up to be rugged, tough, but still had the same pretty features that his Dean had. So, yeah, Sam shouldn't be jealous at all. It didn't stop him from holding his brother's hand a little tighter though.

And, of course, he rubbed the same little circles on Dean's hand. It told him that he was okay. It told him that things would be fine. It was their signal to each other that they loved each other. 

\---

"John?" Mary stepped into the kitchen seeing Castiel and John sitting at the table, "John are you okay?" She rushed to his side, placing her hands on his face. After all this time and all these bad decisions and all these strained feelings, she still loved the man. Deep down, Mary still loved him. Cas could see it on her worried face, the way she checked him over, gentle hands brushing over skin. He wasn't sure how it made him feel. It wasn't quite anger, but something close.

Castiel had obviously done things to save Sam and Dean, but he'd done it for Mary too. He didn't trust John, didn't like John. He didn't like Mary with John. Which was odd. Right?

John looked at Mary, then over he shoulder at Castiel. He could tell there was a trace of jealousy on the angel's face, but confusion was the bigger emotion the other man wore. "I'm fine, Mary, now at least. I shouldn't have done that, shouldn't have slapped Dean. I just... everything is so messed up right now."

He let out a deep breath, "Ever since you left I tried to do the best for him. I would have given up everything for that boy. I want him to have a good life, to not have to work a dead end job like I do. So I pushed him into sports, he's great at them, I thought, I thought that he could get a scholarship, get out of this town, go to college and make something of himself. I can't afford to send him myself. I never knew he hated it, he never told me, never complained to me about not wanting to be an athlete. So when he just out of the blue quits... I don't know, I felt like it was a slap in the face."

"He wanted to join the drama club, John," Mary said, giving him a look. "He said that you told him that you didn't approve of it."

John shook his head, looking down at his hands, "I didn't want people staring at him. I've seen the looks, the way people watch him like he is nothing but a piece of meat to have and touch and use for their own pleasure, the way they want to break him. I just wanted him strong, so no one could do that to him. And I failed, the one thing I feared the worst happened and it almost killed me. You don't know what happened, you don't know about when he disappeared for almost a month two years ago. By the time I found him, he was so damn broken that I didn't know if I would ever be able to fix him, the things those monsters, those animals had done to him..." he trailed off, his voice shaky, tears streaming down his face.

"I might not be the best father in the world, but everything I have done was to protect Dean."

\---

Dean wasn't quite sure what was going on, there was a charged vibe in the air, one he couldn't put a name to.

\---

Sam swallowed, his mind racing with thoughts he really shouldn't be having. He needed to get out of the room, needed to get away from temptation, before he did something rash. Whatever was going on here couldn't just be rushed into. It had to be talked about first, and if anything was to happen, it wasn't going to happen when the boys parents were right downstairs.

\---

"I know John," Mary's expression went soft, "You didn't know what to do. I should've." She sighed and Castiel saw the imminent sadness on her face, "I wish I could've stayed. I would've you know," She gave the man a smile, a look of old adoration. Castiel knew how they met, he knew their story. He knew how much Mary had fallen in love with John--but he also knew that John had been a different man in the beginning. He'd changed as time went on, and like always, he broke when Mary left.

Castiel decided that perhaps they needed a moment--or maybe he was just feeling uncomfortable watching Mary with John. He stood outside the room, not being able to help but eavesdrop. 

"John, I always loved you," he could hear her voice and imagined the way she would wrap her arms around John's neck.

But wait, Castiel made a face. Loved. That would be the past tense form, as in she did not feel the same way now as she did at a previous point in her life. Somehow, this little fact made the tightness in Cas' chest relax a little. All of this still felt overwhelmingly confusing. He wasn't used to this feeling. He had felt love, sadness, anger, pain, happiness, etc. The Winchesters had always helped him through all those different emotional processes, but this one was new. Where was he supposed to categorize it?

\---

Sam stared at the men, noticing how they both seemed a little tense now. He wondered what had happened, but he could feel it too. He looked over at Dean, who was still holding the pillow firmly over his lap. He quickly looked away, the last thing he needed was to become aroused in front of the other Sam and Dean. Talk about awkward. Of course, that just made things worse, because now Sam was thinking about it and he shouldn't be and the best thing to do was look down at the floor--so that's what he did. 

"So are you both okay?" the other Sam looked at both of them, "I mean, as much as you can be." He placed a comforting hand on both of their knees and it made Sam's skin feel too hot.

"Yeah," Sam nodded.

"We're just gonna go downstairs then," the other Dean gestured towards the door, "You two try and get some sleep."

"You've got school tomorrow," Sam said in a brotherly tone and it almost brought a smile to Sam's face.

When the door closed behind the two men, Sam looked over at Dean. He looked like he was about to devour him, but in the best way possible. Just the look in Dean's eyes was making Sam's heart race a little and his pants start getting tighter. How did Dean even manage to do that?

As soon as the door closed tightly behind the older Sam and Dean, Dean turned to face Sam. He reached over, brushing his thumb along Sam's lower lip, leaning his face in towards the younger teen. "Mmm, good morning, Sweetie," he whispered, a breath away from Sam's lips. Dean's other hand reached down, grabbing Sam by the hip, pulling him towards Dean. Within moments, Dean had Sam straddling his lap, his hands resting on Sam's ass. Sam had his fingers tangled into Dean's hair, their lips locked in a passionate kiss. Dean's hands shoved at the material of Sam's sleep pants until his hands latched onto the firm flesh of Sam's ass. 

Dean let out a groan, his hands rubbing small circles on the mounds as they moved down slowly, "Gonna have you again, gonna make you feel so damn good. Always want you, you're everything." He grinned when Sam let out a tiny whimper as Dean's fingertips teased over his hole. 

\---

Sam sat down on the bed, hand running over his face. He didn't know what was going on anymore. Things had been simple, he didn't have Dean, he fought monsters, but now... now things were complicated. He had Dean again, which was amazing. They weren't fighting to save the world from ending, he'd have to get used to that one. Oh and there was the fact that he just came close to shoving an 18 year old version of his older brother against a bed and screwing his brains out, nothing unusual about that was there. He let out a manic laugh, holding his head in his hands.

\---

"I know, I always loved you too, Mary. But things are different now. I'm not... I'm not the man you fell in love with. You deserve better than me, you deserve more." Even though it broke his heart to say those words, John knew it was the truth. He knew that too much had happened, that Mary and himself were not the people they had been when they fell in love. He looked out the window, watching the sunrise through the curtains. "I'm gonna walk home. When... when Dean gets up, can you tell him I'm sorry, and ask him to come home and talk to me. Just ask him, I'll understand if he says no, but..." 

"John, your--our--boy is much more understanding than you give him credit for," Mary gave him a warm smile, "You raised a wonderful kid." She gave him a kiss, but it wasn't one for romance, it was something else. Perhaps a goodbye of sorts or maybe an apology of some kind. 

Mary walked him to the door, noticing Castiel waiting patiently outside the kitchen. She stepped out on the porch and watched John walk back to his home. It wasn't long before she felt a comforting hand on her shoulder. She turned to be met by the bright eyes of the angel. Mary didn't let herself contemplate her actions, she just wrapped Castiel into an embrace. Tucking her face in his neck.

Her instincts told her to let go when he didn't react, but she waited. Slowly, the angel wrapped his arms around her too, holding her snuggly in his arms. Mary felt safe--which was unusual to say the least.

\---

"Deeaan," Sam drug out his brother's name into a whine, "I'm not gonna be able to function at school if I don't get a little sl--" His sentence was lost in the feel of Dean kissing and sucking marks onto his neck. Sam moved his hips in rhythm with Dean's, making little moans at the contact.

Sleep or sex? Sleep or sex. Sleep. Sex. Sam decided that he could sleep another time, sleep was for the weak. It wasn't like he hadn't pulled an all-nighter before. His fingers brushed their way under Dean's shirt, feeling the way he shuddered at the almost ticklish movement. "Need you Dean," he murmured, "Only you."

\---

"You all right?" Dean stood in the doorway watching his brother. He held out a beer--Dean felt lucky that there was a coupe in the fridge. 

He moved to sit down beside Sam, clinking their bottles together. Their legs were touching, and it had been such a long time since that had just felt comfortable instead of a painful reminder of what could've been. Dean never thought that he'd be so happy to be thrown into an alternate reality.

\---

Dean moaned against Sam's lips, his fingers carding through the younger teen's silky locks. He pulled back to laugh briefly when the sound of church bells rang out, "Damn, it's morning already, isn't it? Mmm, all those people, heading off to church, and here we are. An angel in the house, me worshiping your body. God, gonna worship you forever, gonna never give this up."

His other hand groped and kneaded at the flesh of Sam's ass, every so often dipping down to tease at Sam's hole with his fingertips. "This is right, you and me, together like this. You know what I've always wanted to do? Been thinking about it for a while now, actually. I wanna take you in the back seat of my car, our car, in the school parking lot one day at lunch. Wanna suck you so hard, gonna have you biting your lips so we aren't heard. Then... then I'm gonna fuck you, right there where we could be caught, gonna cum in you so hard, want you to have my cum in you for the rest of the school day. God, you'll still be all slick from my cum when we get out, and we'll start heading home, but we won't make it, oh no, you'll have me pull over so I can fuck you again, mmm, can't wait until we can do that, Baby."

\---

Sam laughed briefly, looking over at Dean, "It says a lot about our life choices that neither of us feels bad about sitting around drinking beers at 7:30 on a Sunday morning, doesn't it?"

He bit his lip, humor leaving his voice, "We can't stay here. Can't stay with Mary. It wouldn't be right, not with... not with thoughts I'm having. I shouldn't, shouldn't be thinking the things I am Dean. What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I thinking about... thinking about things I really should never think about."

\---

John sighed walking into his empty house. He knew he had screwed up big time, and would understand if Dean wouldn't want to talk to him again. He walked to the phone, dialing a number he hadn't called in months. "Hey, it's John. I screwed up, screwed up big this time. I think... I don't think Dean will ever forgive me, not after... not after what I said. I slapped him, I did the one thing I promised myself I would never do, I laid a hand on my boy in anger. Shit, I don't know what to do. Can you... can you come see me... I need you, Bobby."

\---

"Fuck Dean," Sam bucked his hips up, "Want your cum in me, need it." He was gasping for every teasing touch that Dean was giving him. Sam could never decide whether he wanted things to be drawn out or if he just needed to cum right then and there. Sometimes, he just threw those thoughts out of his head, because he knew that Dean would always give him exactly what he needed. "Want you to do that to me," he groaned feeling Dean's finger press just any against his hole--it wasn't even fair how Dean could get Sam's body this riled up. "Don't care if anybody sees," Sam's eyes fluttered shut when Dean's fingers came up to brush against his cock before sliding back down.

How was he ever supposed to do anything but this when Dean was around? He didn't even want to do anything else. Just wanted to worship and be worshipped. Everything in Sam's world was Dean, and he was okay with that.

\---

"You talkin' 'bout--uh--" Dean glanced up at the ceiling, hearing the noises of two boys who were definitely not sleeping. He couldn't even be angry because he and Sam never slept when they were that age. When they hit high school, all bets were off. Although hearing it now upstairs was a little different than experiencing it back then. 

Dean shifted on the bed, his body aching to react to those noises. He was pretty sure that he heard young Sammy moan out his name--and, Hell, did that do things to him. It was bringing back all kinds of memories--fond memories--but not exactly appropriate.

\---

"Be there soon as I can John," Bobby answered, not letting his voice falter. He was always there for John and Dean. Well, he was always there for Mary and Sam too, but they didn't know that. Truth be told, it was hard for Bobby to keep Mary and John from finding out that he was trying to take care of both those crazy kids. After all, you listen to an angel when he makes it through every boobytrap that you have set up and demands very clearly that you've got a job to do.

Bobby always figured that Castiel had helped him--more than once--to not be found out by Mary and John. 

\---

Dean shoved Sam's pajama pants off the rest of the way, rolling them so he was on top of Sam. He pulled back briefly, pulling his boxers off, before straddling the younger boys legs. He ground down against Sam, their cocks lining up at the motion. Dean groaned at the sensation, "Oh, fuck, Sammy, don't think... don't think I'll last long enough for that right now. Gotta cum, dammit, Sammy, need you."

He grabbed Sam's hand, placing it on his aching cock, "That's it, Baby, god yes, touch me, need you to..." he bit his lip hard, trying not to scream out Sam's name as he came all over Sam's hand and chest. His body trembled with aftershocks. He leaned into Sam, the motion making Sam's cock rub against his ass, "Mmm, god, Sammy, want you. So pretty, Baby Boy, want that hard cock of yours inside me. Can I have it?" he asked with a whisper, watching as Sam nodded his consent with a low moan. 

Dean ran his hands through the mess of cum on Sam's chest, gathering enough to cover Sam's cock entirely. Dean knew he was still stretched from earlier, and even if he wasn't stretched enough, he needed this. He reached between them, positioning Sam's cock at his entrance, biting his lip as the head breached his body. His body arched as he sunk down on the hard length, moaning Sam's name. God he knew he was gonna be heard, but couldn't stop himself. He could hear Sam moaning his name in return, his brother grabbing Dean's hips and pulling Dean the rest of the way down. "Oh, fuck, Sammy," he moaned, knowing that Sam was completely inside him was arousing. His dick gave an interested twitch, and he moaned again, rocking up and down on the hard length inside him.

\---

Sam swallowed hard, the noises from the boys room making him painfully hard. "Fuck," he muttered under his breath, popping open the button on his jeans to try and take some pressure off of his cock. He looked over to see a look on Dean's face, a look that he knew was mirrored on his own. 'Oh, fuck it,' he thought, shoving Dean back against the bed, yanking open the older man's pants. He pulled out Dean's hard cock, grinning at the moan of pleasure that escaped Dean's mouth when his tongue snaked out to tease lightly at the tip. Sam looked up into Dean's eyes as his mouth sunk down the hard length. 

He remembered what Dean liked, what got Dean going, and called upon those skills to aid him in his task. He moaned around Dean's hard flesh when Dean's fingers snaked into his hair, the older man directing Sam's motions with his hand. God how he had missed this, Dean just taking what he wanted, using Sam to get it. He moaned louder around Dean's hard cock when the man reached over him and spanked him, HARD, the act forcing Sam to grind his hips into the bed. 

\---

John made himself a pot of coffee, knowing that it would be at least an hour for Bobby to get there.

\---

Mary had walked out of the house when the moaning started, pulling Castiel with her. They went back to the diner they had been at the night before, and Mary ordered breakfast and coffee. 

"They'll need to find a place to live," she said softly, "I don't think that I can deal with them... with the noise all the time."

Sam was gasping at the heat and pressure around his cock, "Oh Dean," he had to close his eyes, just to focus--to keep from coming so quickly. When Dean started rocking back against him, Sam groaned and opened his eyes back up. He noticed that Dean's cock was filling back out. "Again?" Sam spoke through breathy sounds, "So hot Dean, you're so perfect," He wrapped his hand around the hardening flesh, stroking and letting his thumb run up the thick vein underneath. "You gonna cum again for me?" Sam pressed their bodies closer together, kissing Dean breathless, "Need you to cum again, wanna see it Dean."

Another moan shot out of Sam's mouth, feeling Dean purposely clench around him. Sam responded by stroking him harder, noticing that Dean was definitely ready for another round. He knew that he couldn't last long, but he needed to see Dean cum again, just had to see it. "Come on Dean, cum for me baby, please? Need to see it, need to see your face when you cum. Love it so much, love you so much," Sam was just throwing out words to encourage Dean. 

Sam heard a loud moan from downstairs. Holy shit, Sam's mind went off the wall, that was Sam and Dean. The other Sam and Dean. They were. Together? Suddenly, he couldn't hold back anymore, Sam started thrusting as hard as he could into Dean's willing body. "You hear 'em Dean? That's us, the other us. We're always together, me and you. No matter where we are or who we are. Me and you Dean. Just me and you," He kissed his Dean passionately; they really were soulmates. Dean and him were meant to be together in every universe.

\---

"Sammy, fuck, yes!" Dean moaned out, lacing his fingers through shaggy, brown hair. It was like his brother remembered every little thing. It was like Sam had this weird muscle memory of Dean in his mouth. He could feel Sam's throat muscles fluttering every time he went all the way down--which was pretty damn frequent. He'd gotten better--and Dean was a little bothered by that fact--but mostly he enjoyed it. Right now, all he could do was enjoy it. "Your mouth, so fucking perfect, so fucking good Sam." Dean bucked up into Sam's mouth, needing to feel that wet heat.

Sounds were coming from above them, and somehow that was just making it better. He heard himself cum; after all, he knew what they sounded like better than anybody else. But fuck, they were still moaning loudly. Dean could barely handle it hearing the boys moaning and feeling Sam moaning around him. It was all too perfect, "Sam, gonna cum, gonna, I can't, I'm so close," Dean was almost whimpering out when Sam took him all the way down, letting his throat do the work. And Dean was coming, just like that. He could feel Sam swallowing it down and, fuck, that made another wave of pleasure just wash over him.

\---

Bobby was driving as quickly as he could, the radio playing some country station. He pressed the 'seek' button, hitting it over and over, but nothing good was on. Maybe he was just a little to strung out to appreciate much music. He was worried about John. He was worried about Dean.

\---

"I can see that it is making you uncomfortable," Castiel replied, watching Mary intently. He liked the way her voice sounded, always soothing and he wanted to describe it as warm--although that didn't make much logical sense to him. "I can talk to them about it, make a suggestion," his stomach spun a little when her eyes met back with his, "If that would please you.

\---

Dean didn't know how much more he could handle, what with Sam and his dirty dirty mouth, god who had taught the boy to talk like that, the way Sam's cock hit his prostate with every single thrust, the way his hand felt wrapped along Dean's cock, or the sounds that were coming from downstairs. Dean whimpered, his oversensitive flesh throbbing in Sam's hand, he couldn't remember ever getting this hard this fast after cumming before in his life. "Fuck, Sammy, just like that. Please, need more, god baby, make me cum, wanna cum for you. Please, just let me cum," the words poured out of Dean's mouth, his eyes locked on Sam's. He was honestly surprised that no one had called the cops on them, the amount of noise they were making.

\---

Sam groaned as Dean came down his throat, licking and sucking until every drop was spent. He pulled off of his brother, grinning up at him as he placed a gentle kiss at the tip. Sam stood, pulling his shirt over his head, and shimmied out of his jeans. He crawled over his brother's prone body, cock hard and resting against his stomach. "Mmm, Dean, you liked that, didn't you?" he whispered into Dean's ear, shuddering with want as Dean wrapped his hand around Sam's aching member. "Fuck, Dean, just like that. Come on, please, god, Dean, make me cum." He let out a needy whine when Dean let go of him and shoved him down onto the bed. 

Sam would have complained, but Dean shushed him with a finger at his lips. Sam watched intently as Dean reached back and began fingering himself open. "Oh, God, Dean, so hot, that's it, get yourself all nice and open for me, Baby. Wanna feel you wrapped around me, wanna cum inside you." Dean kissed him hard, his tongue dueling with Sam's as he worked himself loose. Sam let out a whimper of lose when Dean pulled away again, only to let out a moan of pleasure as Dean straddled his body. Sam rested his hands on his brother's hips, guiding him down Sam's length. "Oh, fuck, Dean," he moaned out as Dean began riding him. His hands ran up and down Dean's chest, tweaking his nipples. Sam knew that he had never felt anything so perfect as being buried inside Dean, knew he would never give this up for anything.

\---

As soon as John heard Bobby's truck pull into his driveway he walked to the door. He knew that the other man would have questions as to what exactly had happened between John and Dean. He winced as he could hear the noises coming from Mary's house, knowing damn well who the voices belonged to. He ushered Bobby into the kitchen, offering him a cup of coffee. John knew he needed to say something, say anything but couldn't find the words.

John heard a knock at his door and went to answer it, surprised to see Mary and Castiel on his porch. He let them in, realizing they were stalling going back to Mary's house because of the boys. He heard Mary gasp as they walked into the kitchen, and noticed her staring at Bobby. "Let me guess, you two know each other?"

\---

"God Dean, can't hold on, need you to cum for me," Sam gave one last stroke and watched as cum spurted onto Dean's stomach. He groaned as Dean's muscles fluttered around him and Sam finally let go. Everything in his mind went blank. All he could think about were the overwhelming waves of pleasure that just seemed to keep coming. He gave a few more thrusts into Dean, hearing the boy whimper beneath him. Sam practically collapsed on his brother--breathless.

"So perfect, Dean, you're perfect, never gonna let you go," Sam was mumbling into Dean's skin, pressing sloppy kisses on him. "Can't believe you came twice for me."

\---

Dean gasped, slowly sinking down. He didn't remember Sam ever being this big. "Jesus Sammy," Dean's chest heaved, his palm pressed flat against Sam's chest. He had to pause to let himself adjust, but Sam's hands were running gently up and down his sides. "Oh fuck, Dean," he gave a small smile at hearing his brother moan out those words. Dean moved a little faster, letting his hips circle and shift, noting all the different sounds that he could provoke out of Sam. 

Sam's hands were running all over Dean's body, and Sam enjoyed that Dean would hiss every time he pulled at his nipples. They both moaned when they heard the boys upstairs obviously finishing. For a moment, Dean imagined the younger Sam, but it was his younger Sam. He remembered how Sam's body had been so small beneath him. He remembered how everything had been so new to Sam and Dean loved getting to teach him all of it. The thought of all those memories made Dean's cock twitch in interesting--well, that, and the fact that Sam did have perfect aim.

\---

"Bobby?" Mary furrowed her brow, "What're you doing here?"

Castiel and Bobby exchanged looks. Castiel had been unaware that Bobby would be here. He hadn't even sensed it. Why? Surely he hadn't been that caught up in his conversation with Mary. They hadn't even been talking about anything of importance.

"Well I--" Bobby paused, trying to think of what to say. When he failed, he looked over at the angel.

"He's here because I called him," John spoke up, "I didn't know you two were friends."

"Friends?" Mary chuckled, "Bobby had been like a father figure to Sam. We've hunted together."

John and Mary kept looking between Castiel and Bobby for some sort of answer. Both the angel and hunter just looked away. Bobby wasn't sure how much he was allowed to say, he was working with an angel of the lord after all. He doubted that angels were the ones you wanted to piss off.

"Has he?" Mary had an almost hurt look on her face, "Cas," Castiel's stomach did that spinning thing again at the nickname, "Was Bobby in on all of this and you didn't...you didn't tell me?" Castiel's stomach immediately sank at seeing her face. 

\---

Dean snuggled up against Sam, still breathing hard. He wrapped the younger boy up in his arms, contently rubbing small circles across his back. "Never did that before, you do things to me, Baby. I never want to stop being surprised when I'm with you, everything we do is so damn good." He placed a soft kiss on Sam's forehead, then leaned across him to set the alarm clock. "I'm thinking we'll get up around noon, how's that sound, Sexy?"

He leaned back down, pulling Sam against his chest and quickly fell into a content sleep.

\---

Sam groaned as he watched Dean's cock starting to fill out once more. "God, you're insatiable aren't you, Babe?" he asked with a slight laugh. He hadn't had this much sex in this short of time since, well since he was a teenager and sleeping with Dean. "When I'm done with you... mmm... I want you to do whatever you want to me with that lovely monster of yours." He stroked Dean's cock once, before setting a brutal pace with his thrusts, moaning Dean's name on each thrust. Within moments he could feel his orgasm approaching, "Oh, fuck, god, Dean!!!!"

\---

Bobby looked between everyone in the room before speaking, "Mary, I'd known you and Sam for three years before I met that Idjit over there," he motioned at Castiel, "and well, I'd known John for a few years at that point as well. Trust me, I'd've told you where John was if I'd known that John was Sam's dad. And John, I didn't know that you knew Mary, would've told you that. You know I would've told you. You two idjits are my friends, and those boys, as pains in the asses as they are, are like sons to me. You think I would have kept something like that from you, something that major?"

Castiel nodded after Bobby stopped talking, "All I told him was that Sam and Dean were soulmates and it would be best for them not to meet until they were older. I asked him to help protect the boys, to make sure they were safe." He looked at Mary, needing her to understand, "I understand if you feel you can't trust me after this, I was just trying to protect them."

"Protect them from what?" John asked, staring at the angel with an unreadable expression on his face.

"From themselves, from each other. You see how they are around each other, you see how they can't, won't survive without each other. How do you think they would have turned out if they met when Sam was any younger than he is? If they had met before Sam hit puberty?"

"Dean wouldn't... you can't say that he would have..." John said, his voice a hard edge, pissed off that the angel would insinuate that his boy would have done something like that.

"I couldn't be certain, I was trying to make sure that couldn't happen. The minute they met they were drawn to each other, you know this, you both know how intertwined those two have been from the minute they met."

\---

Sam could tell when Dean had fallen asleep. He could tell by the way his breathing got lower and deeper. He could tell by how his heartbeat slowed down to a gentler pace. Sam closed his eyes, listening to the air going in and out of Dean's lungs and listening to each beat of his heart. It was like his own personalized lullaby. Sam didn't think that he could ever love anybody else. Dean was his only one. 

Sometimes, Sam would wonder if Dean loved him as much as he said he did. He would wonder if maybe he was just some sort of phase. He would wonder if Dean would find somebody better--because God knows, Dean could have just about anyone that he wanted. Sam didn't say much about those thoughts. He knew that Dean was insecure enough and didn't want to drag him down anymore. But still. Sometimes Sam wondered if Dean would leave him eventually. Sam would understand if he did, he wouldn't like it, but he would understand.

However, it was times like these that Sam didn't worry or wonder. Dean was right there in his grasp, cuddled beneath him, and Sam felt loved and safe. Dean was the first person who had ever made him feel both of those things at once. 

\---

Dean moaned with every thrust that Sam gave him. He watched Sam's features distort with pleasure when his orgasm hit him. Dean had meant to wait, wanted to do more, but seeing Sam like that and hearing him moaning out his name. That was apparently all it took these days, because Dean's orgasm followed Sam's very closely. He came over Sam's stomach having barely been touched this time. 

"Damn Sammy," Dean leaned forward, resting some of his weight on Sam, "Don't even know how you do what you do to me," He pressed a lazy kiss onto Sam's lips.

\---

Mary immediately regretted that she thought Castiel had been hiding things from her. She knew that he only did what he had to do. Mary gave him an apologetic look, hoping that he would pick up on her body language that she was sorry.

"John, Castiel is right," Mary tore her gaze away from the angel, "Who knows how the boys would've reacted if they had met sooner. You and I both know that they were inseparable from the second they spoke."

"The other...Sam and Dean grew up together and they turned out all right," John retorted.

"They grew up in a reality where Mary died and you became obsessed with hunting," Castiel replied, "It only makes sense that they would turn out slightly different. However, things started for them at an early age too John. They were just lucky that they had hunting and family to distract them from acting too early."

"How early are we speaking?" John asked, part of him not wanting to know the answer.

"Sam was 12. It actually began on his birthday." Castiel answered, noticing the shocked expressions on the others faces. "By the time their father found out about it, Sam was a Senior in High School. Their father forced Sam to leave, making it seem to Dean that it was Sam's choice, hiding the fact that Sam kept trying to get a hold of Dean. So by the time they met back up four years later there was a wedge of bitterness and anger between them. When I met them, their relationship was almost shattered. They didn't talk about things, not what had happened at least, and ended up hurting each other again and again. And yet, even with the wedge between them, Dean still sold his soul for Sam. This was a year after John sold his own soul to save Dean."

He heard the others gasp. "There was a demon... one of his minions had damaged Dean badly, he was dying and John made a deal with the demon, his soul for Dean's life. And then a year later, another minion of the demon, a human boy who like Sam had been chosen by the demon, killed Sam. Stabbed him in the back, he died in Dean's arms. So Dean made a deal with a crossroads demon, his soul for Sam's life. Most deals of that nature grant the recipient ten years before hellhounds are sent to retrieve them, but Dean only got one. And if they did anything to break the deal, Sam would die. Dean's year came up, and he was killed in front of Sam, ripped to shreds, and his soul was dragged to Hell. It was due to events that took place while he was there that I was sent to drag him out. That was a few years ago, and Sam and Dean have become true friends of mine, teaching me so much. I rebelled, fell for them, to help them. And when I was at my worst they saw me through it, even after I did what I did."

\---

The alarm went off and Dean woke with a grin on his face. He looked at Sam, realizing that he hadn't slept. "Baby, why didn't you sleep? You need your rest."

\---

Sam couldn't remember the last time he felt so at peace, not even before he went to college. Before their dad had found out he and Dean were always sneaking around, hiding what they were to each other, and part of him had always hated that. He smiled sleepily at Dean, placing a soft kiss on his lips before settling down once more to rest.


	6. Emotions Run High

Mary knew about the last part. She knew that Castiel had pulled her son out of Hell. She always wondered what made him do it. Maybe he only did it because he was ordered to, or maybe he had been watching all long and chose to. Mary wondered why Castiel chose to save her son. Mary knew about Casitel's fall from grace, but he never went into detail. She always figured that it hurt to much to talk about, but it didn't stop her curiosity. There were many things about Castiel that made her curious. He was an angel though, and she supposed that humans were meant to be a little curious about such beings.

"You look like you could use a beer," Bobby clapped a hand on John's shoulder, "How 'bout you and me go get a drink. I'll buy." Of course, Bobby knew that John would agree if he was buying. Bobby assumed the poor man needed someone to talk to. He had to be going a little insane right now. Insane enough that the idjit actually slapped his boy. 

\---

"Mmm," Sam snuggled Dean's chest, "couldn't stop listening to your heart," He hadn't actually meant to admit that--and if he hadn't been completely exhausted he would've been ashamed to admit that. However, he was worn out and tired and couldn't manage to keep his eyes open for more than a couple seconds, so he just pulled Dean closer to him. Sam sighed, breathing him in. "Love you so much Dean, mean it." he mumbled with a voice veiled in sleep.

\---

Dean couldn't put his finger on the feeling that he was having right now. He was completely relaxed. Like, completely. Had that even ever happened before? Even once? It had certainly never fully happened with Sam, they were always worried about being caught, being seen together. Now, it felt like it didn't really matter. Castiel had already told everybody that Sam and Dean were soulmates no matter what universe you put them in--so Dean figured that they were in the clear as far as that went.

Maybe they could just stay here, in this world. He and Sam could get a place together. Live together. Have some sort of messed up domestic life. He doubted the he'd ever be able to stop hunting completely, but they'd have a home to go to after each case if they got a house. This was crazy...What was he thinking?

They couldn't really stay here, could they?

\---

Mary and Castiel walked back into her home, greeted by silence. She walked upstairs, peeking into Sam's room, noticing how he was passed out, his face buried on Dean's chest the older boy caressing his back gently as they slept. She went back downstairs, and walked into the kitchen, starting the coffee maker. 

They sat talking over coffee for a few hours until Dean and Sam stumbled into the kitchen at about 3 o'clock, both teens heading directly for the coffee. 

"Morning, or afternoon, or whatever," Dean said with a yawn, leaning against the counter. He accepted a piece of toast from Sam, kissing him in thanks before seeming to realize just where he was. "Hehe, sorry. It's been an odd few days."

Mary smiled at him, the kiss had been innocent enough, it hadn't been Dean who had gotten gropey hands, it had been Sam. Mary wasn't sure if Dean knew everything about him and she hoped he would understand why Sam was the way he was.

She looked up when the other Sam and Dean, the older Sam and Dean, walked into the kitchen, looking more awake than her boys. The men were fully dressed and were carrying take out containers. 

"We got lunch," Sam said, setting the food on the table. He looked at Castiel, "We need to know something, something important Castiel. Are we here for good, or are we eventually going to have to go back there?"

Castiel felt every eye in the room suddenly on him. That was an awfully big question for him to answer. He knew that they needed to go back. He knew that they didn't really "belong" in this world. Not really, not matter how much they wanted to. 

But Castiel really wanted to. He wanted to belong in this world. He could see how happy Dean and Sam were here; they were finally back together as they should've been for years. He saw how the younger Dean and Sam were happier too--maybe they wouldn't run away with everyone around. All of that was nice, but those weren't the reasons Cas really wanted to stay--they were just the extras. Cas wanted to stay because he liked it here. He liked that Mary was always around, with her pretty eyes and kind smile. Cas wanted to stay because he liked watching over all of his humans at once, no more going back and forth. Cas wanted to stay because he really enjoyed talking to Mary--who he officially decided was the most accepting person he knew. He enjoyed knowing that Mary was safe all the time. He enjoyed getting to see her any time he wanted.

The more he though about it, Castiel supposed that maybe he just wanted to stay because of Mary. He frowned at this idea. His attachment to her was unusual. It didn't feel like his bond with Sam and Dean or the other Sam and Dean. 

Then again, staying meant that he was putting them all in jeopardy. He knew that he was being sought after for the things he had done, the things he had changed to accommodate Mary and the boys in this universe. If he stayed, would they still come after him? Would they hurt all the people he risked his life to protect? How was he supposed to make this decision?

But then he looked up and Mary's eyes were still gazing at him. All shiny and calm, waiting patiently for his answer. He figured that she probably was trying not to influence his decision, she probably wanted him to not feel pressured by anyone. 

"I think," Cas cleared his throat, "It would be all right if we stayed for a while." He attempted at an answer that was somewhat middle of the road.

Sam looked at Cas, knowing that the angel was keeping things from them. He motioned Cas to follow him into the living room to talk in private, "How bad would things be if we stayed for good? I mean, our world has gone to Hell, and yeah there are a lot of innocents still there, but think of all we could to here, think of what we could prevent... Azazel might be gone, there might not be the whole demon blood issue with the kids, but think of everything else... what if we leave and another demon tried to pull what Azazel did, could any of us live with ourselves if that happened? If we left them and it got them killed? I mean, Hell, Castiel, what if us coming here brought something to this world... how could we leave and let them have to clean up our mistakes."

Sam could tell he had given Cas a lot to think about and turned to walk back into the kitchen. The sight that greeted him made him groan inwardly. Dean was talking with Mary at the table, but the other Sam and Dean... Sam had Dean sort of pinned against the counter, his arms wrapped around the taller teens neck, and was kissing him passionately. The two of them seemed to not be able to keep their hands off of each other, what with Dean cupping the younger boy's ass as they made out. 

\---

Dean pulled back slightly, licking his lips. He leaned to whisper into Sam's ear, "Need to go upstairs, Baby. Want you so bad right now." 

He grinned as Sam made his way out of the kitchen, following closely behind him. They were barely inside Sam's room when Sam was back in his arms. Dean shoved at Sam's pajama pants, forcing them down the boy's hips. As soon as Sam was naked Dean grabbed him by the hips, having Sam wrap his legs around him. Dean carried him to the bed, setting him down lightly before kicking off his boxers. He crawled over Sam's prone body, peppering his skin with kisses and licks and nibbles. "Shh, Sammy, we need to be quiet. Can you be quiet for me, Love? Or am I gonna have to gag you, am I gonna have to put something in that pretty little mouth of yours?"

Dean glanced up and saw his brother's expression and then saw the other Sam and Dean hurry out of the room. Jesus, were they really like that back then? Dean wondered how he hadn't died by now if that was the way they used to be. But he could remember the feeling. Not being able to stop touching each other just because it was exciting and felt good. He'd zoned out for a moment, and Mary was giving him a look.

"Sorry Mo-M-Mary," he almost slipped up, "Just zoned out there."

"Not surprised," Mary gave him a little grin. She turned as Sam walked into the room, Castiel not following. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah," Sam nodded, "He's just mulling things over you know."

"Good," Mary nodded back, but glanced into the living room. She could barely see him through the awkward angle and the doorframe, but he kept rubbing his face with his hands. He probably needed some alone time, just some time to think, but somehow she ended up walking into the living room anyways. Cautiously, she approached him and stroked a hand down his arm as a gesture of comfort.

\---

"Those two sure are eager about each other," Sam sat down across from Dean.

"I was just thinking about how we used to be," Dean winked at his brother, "Although, I think it might kill me if we were still like that. A man can only take so much," he smiled when Sam chuckled at his comment. 

Being around their younger selves was an odd feeling. Part of Dean couldn't stop relishing in old memories, part of him wanted them to just stop touching each other for a second so he could think clearly, and part of him couldn't stop thinking about young Sammy--which just brought him right back to the beginning of the circle by making him relish in old memories. He knew that Sam was feeling a little bit of the same way, but damn, it wasn't like they could just talk about it. This was certainly one of the more awkward things that they had ever felt. 

\---

"Dean, I don't know if we should," he let out a soft moan when Dean gave his nipple a little suck and nibble, "I can't stay--ngh--qu-quiet," He really wasn't sure that they should be doing this, but Dean already had him all worked up. Sam was trying not to arch up into Dean's touch, but his body had other ideas and simply didn't listen to his mind's requests. They really needed somewhere to do this, somewhere a little more private.

Sam was happily drowning in the idea of them having their own place. Being able to be together any time they wanted. Dean would take care of him and he would take care of Dean. They wouldn't need anybody else but each other. All of Dean's words were always perfect; they made Sam's heart race and pound and feel like it might explode.

But Sam could feel something lingering between them. He could feel the underlying tension in Dean's body.

"God, you know I want to," Sam replied and whined a little when Dean bounded up from the bed yanking his pants on. Once Dean got his shirt on, he was staring at Sam impatiently. Sam knew that he was wondering why Sam wasn't jumping up and pulling him through the back door to get to Dean's house. But something was wrong, Sam could feel it. He couldn't tell what it was, but it was there.

"Dean...do you not like talking to me?" Sam couldn't believe that the question came out. "I mean, I didn't mean it like that. It's just." Sam wasn't sure what he meant to say. "Something's wrong. I can feel it Dean, and I just. Is it me?"

\---

Dean couldn't believe what his brother was saying. He wanted to stay here? In this world?

Dean grinned, because why was he surprised? Sam always dreamed of having some semi-normal life. Granted, this life wasn't exactly normal, but it was closer than what they had back home. He saw that little gleam of hope in Sam's eyes. Sam was always hopeful...that's what Dean loved about him.

"I think that a, uh, fresh start," Dean started, "could be good."

Dean felt like he had been slapped in the face. He let out a little whine of lose as he fell to his knees against the door, head down as tears started falling. "God, no, Sam, how can you think that? You're my world... the only thing in my life that is good and right and pure. I know... I know I'm not good enough for you, for anyone, and you're gonna realize that someday... and then... you'll realized that you don't need someone as fucked up as me in your life... you'll realize you can do better, find someone who isn't an empty shell, someone who doesn't depend on you like I do, doesn't bring you down." 

Dean was shaking, refusing to look in Sam's eyes, "I just... I want to have what I can as much as I can before... before I lose you... I've told you how I feel, you know that you're... that you're my reason for..." he trailed off refusing to say the words. "I'm broken, I'm worthless without you, and I know you're gonna figure that out one day. As much as it kills me sometimes I think you should try and find someone better... someone who isn't so lost."

Sam scrambled to the floor, crawling to Dean. He hadn't meant to hurt him, he never wanted to hurt Dean. He loved Dean. He loved Dean more than he had ever loved anyone. There was nothing that mattered more to Sam than Dean did.

"Shh, Dean, it's okay," Sam pulled Dean in close, "I don't think you're worthless or an empty shell. Dammit Dean!" Sam shook the boy's shoulders, "Look at me okay?" He felt tears prick his eyes when Dean finally looked up at him. "I love you," Sam whimpered the words out. He didn't know how to make Dean see how much he loved him. "Dean, I love you more than anything. You...you fixed me. I just, dammit, I just need you to see how much I love you," Sam couldn't stop himself from sobbing, his chest heaving a little.

There wasn't anything that Dean could do that would ever convince Sam not to love him. Dean was everything to Sam, everything. It was Sam who didn't deserve this kind of love. He was the one who was a monster, Dean just hadn't seen that side of him yet. Sam was terrified for when that would finally happened. How could Dean not see how perfect he was? How could Dean not see what Sam saw?

Dean wrapped his arms around Sam's neck, crying against his shoulder. God, was Sam as fucked up as Dean? "We are something else, aren't we? You'd think... you'd think that at least one of us would be normal. I just... I love you more than I thought I could love anyone, anything in my life. I just... these thoughts keep coming to me, that you're gonna leave me, because I'm not good enough, or because I push you to hard, or because I'm too clingy and possessive."

He swallowed hard, "I've seen the way he looks at you, and it scares me. You deserve so much better than me, you deserve someone who can take care of you, not someone who couldn't even stop... and I see him and he's strong and can protect you and all I can think is that you're gonna realize that you made a mistake hooking up with me." 

Dean looked away again, eyes shut tightly, "I don't think... I don't think you and I could ever just be brothers... and it kills me to know... I know that I'm gonna end up losing you. Be it because you realize you can do better, or I screw up and do something that you will never be able to forgive me for."

He kissed Dean, he couldn't stand seeing his so distraught. "Don't you think that I worry about the same things?" He stroked his hand against Dean's face, feeling the stubble growing there. "You're never gonna lose me. I could never leave you. You're my, you're my everything. There's nobody else for me. There's nobody else. I love you." Sam bit his lip, "And you're not allowed to leave me either," because he might go off the deep end and kill more than just monsters, but Sam didn't add that onto his sentence.

Suddenly, it hit him that Dean was talking about the other Dean. Was he being serious? "Are you talking about...the other...Dean?" Sam frowned. "He's nothing compared to you."

\---

Sam and Dean had noticed that things were quiet from Sam's room, too quiet all things considering. They made their way up the stairs, pausing at the door when they heard Sam speaking.

\---

Dean laughed bitterly, "He's everything, everything I'm not. He's strong and doesn't break down at the littlest thing. He isn't as screwed up as me. He could take care of you, hunt with you. He knows what he's doing obviously. If I... if I ever went on a hunt with you I'd just end up getting us, getting you killed." 

He ran a hand over his face, "Dammit, Sam, why can't you realize I'm not good enough, that I'll never be good enough... you... you could have anyone, not some messed up freak like me. Why? Why am I the one... why am I the one you fell for? I don't... I don't understand what you see in me... " Anything else he would have said was cut off by Sam as the younger teen grabbed him and kissed him hard. 

"I want forever, Sammy, I really do. But I am so terrified that I'm gonna lose you. Things with you are perfect, too perfect and... I guess I am just waiting for the other shoe to drop."

Sam had practically crawled his way on Dean's lap. "First off, nobody takes care of me better than you," he nuzzled Dean's cheek before kissing him. "And if we ever went on a hunt, no monster would even have the opportunity to get close to you because I'd kill anything that ever tried to hurt you. You shouldn't doubt my hunting skills," Sam gave a small chuckle.

"Dean, I just want you. Nobody loves me like you do. That other Dean isn't you. He's never gonna be you. You're who drives me crazy, not him." Sam pressed his forehead against his, staring into those beautiful green eyes. "How can you not see how perfect, how beautiful you are?"

\---

"Should we," Dean whispered and gestured towards the door. Sam shrugged at him.

Something in him cringed at Sam's words. He could remember similar things being said to him by his own Sam. Hearing it now, he wondered why it was so hard to believe back then. While he still didn't know why Sam loved him or what he saw, he knew that Sam did love him. This poor kid seemed to be completely oblivious so how much that kid loved him. Damn, you could just hear it in their voices that they were terrified and loved each other too much.

Why did love always have to be so scary for the Winchesters?

\---

Dean looked at Sam, swallowing hard. Things were so damn hard for him to understand, he couldn't remember being this scared in his life. People said love made you do crazy things and he had never known what they meant until he met Sam. He stared into Sam's eyes, those hazel orbs that distracted him so much, "You're the beautiful one, Sammy. You're everything I could have ever wanted or asked for. And... mmm, knowing that you think I am beautiful makes me happy, everything about you makes me happy. I don't care what anyone says, you're perfect."

He stood, pulling Sam with him, and embraced the younger boy, "It should scare me, knowing that you would kill for me, and I know deep down in my soul that you would, but it doesn't. God, it kinda turns me on, knowing that you can and will hurt anything that hurts me. Well, anything but me... but even then, you'd fix things. We need... we need to tell Mary... need to tell her about this..." he took Sam's hand, kissing the ring on Sam's finger, the temporary engagement ring. "I think... I think that we need to go somewhere, somewhere and look, you know, to pick out something better." 

Dean kissed Sam gently, "Gonna do something tomorrow I haven't done yet. Gonna kiss you at school, where anyone can see us, so they know, so they know that you're mine and I'm yours. So people will stop... stop trying to get what they will never have. Can I? Can I let everyone at school know that you're mine, can I be obnoxiously all over you in the hallways?"

"I don't care about rings Dean," he kissed the boy, "but I do think we should tell Mom. And I don't know who exactly is trying to get with me other than you," Sam found himself getting lost in nothing but green when he looked into Dean's eyes, "but you can kiss me any time you want." He brushed their lips together, "Always wanna kiss you Dean, always." When he kissed him again, he let their tongues tangle together. 

Deep down, Sam couldn't wait for Dean to kiss him at school. People would see Dean kissing him. Dean. Kissing. Him. Everyone would see the sexiest senior in the school kissing the nerdiest freshman. Sam knew that Dean cared about him the most, but it didn't stop him from getting a little jealous when people would look at his Dean. All those boys and girls, just wanting their own little pieve of Dean, and that was just too bad. Dean was going to be Sam's as long as Dean would allow it.

\---

"Are you okay?" Mary said after a few minutes of standing quietly with her hand on Castiel's shoulder. She noticed how tired he looked compared to when she had first met him. He had been so divine back then, now he looked so close to human--beautiful and broken. "You don't have to stay here and you don't have to leave either. No one's pressuring you either way."

\---

Sam and Dean went back downstairs, nodding at Castiel and Mary before moving to sit out on the porch. While they weren't exactly sure what the younger versions of themselves wanted to tell Mary, they knew that it was private and they probably wouldn't want people watching them.

"Gotta say one thing," Sam said with a grin, "at least if we do stay here, we'll have our car." That fact alone spoke to Sam that part of Castiel wasn't planning on them leaving here. He had brought not only the Winchesters with him, but all of their possessions.

\---

Dean let out a breath, "I know you might not care about rings, Sammy, but it's important to me. I don't know, I just... I need you to be wearing my ring, and my class ring isn't... it isn't enough. Not in my eyes."

He smiled at Sam, intertwining their fingers and leading him downstairs. They sat down on the couch across from Mary, Dean letting out a deep breath.

It felt awkward to be announcing this to the angel too, but they hardly felt like they could just ask him to leave. "Hey Mom?" Sam asked, a little timid. Suddenly, this felt like a lot bigger of a deal than it had a few minutes ago while he was still in Dean's arms.

"Yeah?" she narrowed her eyes and Sam knew that she could sense his tension. Sometimes he hated that his mom had undeniable mother senses.

"Dean and I wanted to talk to you about something," Sam started, "Well, tell you about something." His hands were shaking until Dean gripped his hand tighter, grounding him. The angel was looking at him like he knew exactly what they were about to announce, but his mom still had a questioning look. Sam wasn't sure how he felt about Castiel seeming to always know what was going on. It was weird.

"I'm all ears," she said with a careful smile.

\---

"Wouldn't wanna be anywhere without my baby," Dean spoke with adoration in his voice. He loved that car more than he loved most humans. He'd admit that maybe it was a little unhealthy, but how many things about him were healthy? Yeah, not many on that list. 

"So what do you think the boys were talking about?" Dean looked over at his brother, almost smiling at the hair that had fallen in his face. "I hope they're not gonna do anything stupid." Dean added.

\---

"Mary, Mom..." Dean started, swallowing hard a blush covering his face, "I've been thinking about this for a while now... planning on this. I want to spend the rest of my life with Sam and I asked him... I asked him to marry me. I know it can never be legal... especially now, but I don't want to live without him. I want to be good for him, want to make a life with him. He's everything to me, and yeah I don't have a lot... don't even have a proper ring yet, but I asked him."

He looks away from Mary, clasping Sam's hand in his, staring intently at Sam, the love and devotion and adoration evident on his face. "He said yes. I know we're young, and we aren't planning on doing anything until after he graduates... but we wanted you to know. I plan on taking care of him as long as he'll let me, I plan on being the best man I possibly can be for him. Sammy is my everything, he's... he's the reason I get up in the morning, the only person I've truly wanted."

"He knows my darkest secrets and still loves me for me. I know this is a lot to take in, but I promise you I will never leave him, I will never do anything to hurt him on purpose. Sam makes me want to be better than I am, makes me a man that I hope you will be proud of. I hope... I hope we can get your blessing."

\---

Sam and Dean were still sitting on the porch when they noticed John and Bobby walking towards the house. Part of Sam wanted to rush off the porch and engulf Bobby in a bear hug, but common sense overruled the desire. The man wasn't the same Bobby Singer that he had known, the same Bobby Singer who had been dead for a while now.

Dean wanted to leap off the porch and run to Bobby, but he knew that it wasn't his Bobby. It wasn't their Bobby. Although that didn't change the fact that seeing this man who looked just like his Bobby made his heart swell up. Dean noticed that Sam had the same expression on his face, he knew that Sam was probably feeling the exact same way.

\---

Sam's heart was racing as he waited for his mom to respond. He couldn't tell if she would be mad or happy or somewhere in between. The only thing keeping Sam was fainting was the fact that Dean had a firm grip on his hand. Honestly, he hadn't felt his head spin like this since the first time that Dean kissed him. He couldn't tell if he was happy or excited or sick.

"Well," Mary nodded slowly, like she was trying to wrap her mind around it, "I suppose if an angel says you two are meant to be together, then fate's certainly had a hand in all of this. Sammy," she reached out a hand to touch his knee--that warm look that she got when he drew her something she liked, "if this is what you want, then it's what I want too." 

A rush of air came out of Sam's lungs before he lept up and hugged his mom tightly. He could feel her laughing against him, but he only squeezed tighter. "Thank you," he grinned. For the moment's sake, Sam lifted her and gave her a spin around. It only made her giggle more, which only made him smile more.

Dean was shaking, he hadn't thought she would take things so well, and watching the look of acceptance on her face brought a tiny bit of peace to him. He knew they still had to tell his, their, father and he doubted the man would be quite so accepting of the engagement. When Sam sat back down next to him, Dean wrapped his arm around Sam's shoulders leaning his head against him, just breathing in his scent. He mentally cursed himself for the action as Sam had the effect he always did on Dean. 

"We still, we have to tell my father. But... we wanted to tell you first." Dean was blushing again, head buried in Sam's neck. 

There was a knock on the door and Mary rose to answer it. She ushered John into the house, Bobby having decided to stay outside and wrap his head around the whole situation, that and the fact that he had noticed the pleased almost heartbroken looks that Sam and Dean had had on their faces.

"The boys have something they need to tell you," Mary said in quiet tones, walking towards the kitchen, Castiel following her close.

Dean swallowed hard, hoping for the best. 

All the excitement that Sam had drained out. He was terrified to tell John. It wasn't that he thought the man was all bad or anything, he just knew that there was that temper. Sam wondered if he could handle John's reaction. If it was a bad one, what would John do? Sam was getting stressed just thinking about it. 

What if John got angry? Really angry. What if he hit Dean? No, he wouldn't hit Dean. Not while Sam was around anyways--and Sam would always be around. 

Or what if he had a good reaction? Highly unlikely. But what if?

\---

"Boys," Bobby nodded at the men standing on the porch. He knew them to be Sam and Dean--and how fitting they were. Bobby felt like he knew them, felt like these were his boys somehow. 

"Bobby," Dean nodded and held out a hand for Bobby to shake. 

Bobby didn't shake Dean's hand. Instead, he wrapped him in a hug. It surprised him that after a moment of stiffness, Dean relaxed into it. Even the hug felt familiar. He pulled away and hugged Sam just as tightly. It felt like deja vu. It was like something he had dreamed. The feeling was odd for Bobby, but he could sense that the boys needed this. 

\---

Dean let out a deep breath, steeling himself for what he was about to do. He looked John straight in the eye, calling upon more strength than he thought he had, "Dad, I know that everything has been kinda rough lately, with me and you. And finding out not only about me having a boyfriend, but it being Sam, the son you didn't know about, that has got to be rough. But... here's the thing, Dad. I love Sam, I love him more than I have ever loved anyone or anything in my life. He makes me a better person. I was kinda planning this for a while now, planning on saving up for a ring."

Before Dean could continue John stopped him, "You asked him to marry you, didn't you?" Dean nodded, "I knew... even though I didn't have a clue that you two were involved, I knew that you two would end up spending the rest of your lives together. I've seen you smile more in the last five months than I have since you were a child. Okay, true, I don't understand your relationship... he's your brother... but I know that the son I had living with me last summer and the son who is sitting before me today are two very different young men. The Dean I knew last year was withdrawn and sullen and didn't smile at anyone, there was no joy in his life. I know I failed you growing up, I know you could have had a better father than me, hell Bobby was a better dad to you than I ever was, but I'm proud of you. Proud of the man you're becoming, proud that you stand up for what you believe in, damn what anyone else thinks."

Dean was shocked when his father dragged him into his arms for a bone crushing hug, only letting go to grab Sam and give him the same kind of hug. He could hear his father whispering to Dam, "You take care of my boy, you take care of him, you hear me. You have to promise to take care of him, he needs you. You saved him, saved him in a way I never could, Sam."

Sam froze when John embraced him, it took him a second to snap out of his 'fight or flight' response before hugging the man back. This was Dean's father--his father--giving some sort of approval for their relationship. Sam never thought that this would happen. Out of all the possible reactions, this wasn't any of the ones Sam suspected would happen. "You know I'll take care of him," Sam answered. "And he saved me too John." 

The last thing that Sam said, he whispered. It was something that he only wanted John to hear. He needed John to hear it. Sam needed him to know that Dean wasn't the only one who needed saved. Despite John's lack of parenting skills, he had raised the most amazing person that Sam had ever met. John had raised Sam's savior. Which made John at least tolerable in Sam's book--if not likable after this interaction with him. John gave him a couple pats on the shoulder when they pulled away. This was the first time that Sam had ever hugged his dad. He had to admit, it felt kind of nice in a way.

Everyone looked over to the door when the other Sam and Dean walked in. Bobby had followed them in and immediately went over to the coffeepot to get a cup--today had been a little much for the old man. 

"We were thinking about taking Baby for a drive," Dean jingled his keys, "and maybe getting something to eat. You all want anything?"

"You should take the boys with you," Mary smiled, "Give you all time to bond since you might be staying for awhile."

Sam looked over at his Dean to see what the boy wanted to do. Dean gave him a little shrug and a nod. Sam supposed they'd have to break the news to the other Sam and Dean too. Which seemed odd to have to tell yourselves that you're getting married to each other.

Sometimes he wondered how an average person would react to Sam telling them his life story. Probably not very well.

They drove to the local diner, the boys grinning like a pair of loons in the backseat. Sam and Dean had seen the hug that John gave Sammy, and were trying for the life of them to understand what had changed. There was an air of excitement surrounding the teens, and it was driving Sam and Dean to distraction. They pulled into the closest parking spot, realizing it was in front of one of the local motels, and Sam raised his eyebrows in a silent question to Dean, asking if he should get them a room so they wouldn't have to be so quiet at Mary's that evening. 

Dean nodded and started walking towards the diner. He turned to face the younger Sam and Dean, noticing confusion on their faces, "Sam figured we'd just get a room for the evening so we don't bother Mary too much tonight."

The teens nodded at that, Dean leaning to whisper something in Sam's ear that made the younger boy blush. Dean could only imagine what was going on in their minds, though he could understand how it had looked, especially with the looks that had been shared off and on since he and Sam had shown up here.

Sam walked up keys in hand, "We ready to get food, or did you two need to talk to us first? If you need to talk... we can get some snacks before we talk and hang out in the room."

Dean swallowed, "Talking and snacks would be great." He sighed, muttering under his breath about wishing he was at home so he could steal a beer.

Sam laughed, "We'll make sure to get everyone something to drink."

They waited patiently in the "Baby" as the older Dean kept calling it, while the men went and got some snacks and drinks. Sam was getting giddy about having a room, being away from their parents for a night. Even if they couldn't do anything while the other Sam and Dean were there, it was still going to be nice just to be away.

"Here," the other Dean tossed some bags in the backseat, "hold these." He laughed when Dean held out his hands to take the case of beer, "Not for you buddyboy," the older Dean sat the case on his Sam's lap, "And certainly not for Sammy."

Sam was about to protest this Dean calling him 'Sammy' but he couldn't find the words. He kind of liked it. He liked the way it sounded in the older man's voice. 

They made their way back to motel and Sam went and got them a roomkey. They were all holding a bag full of goodies and set them down on the floor when they walked in. The room was sort of small, but there were two beds. Sam wondered if they were going to get a motel room that night anyways and he wondered if they would've gotten one with just one bed. Sam shook the thought away, getting a boner right now wouldn't be very fun in his opinion.

The older Dean cracked open a beer and tossed one to his Sam, "So what'd you boys wanna talk 'bout?" Sam watched the man take a swig from his drink. He looked over at Dean--who currently had a mouthful of something, probably some pastry product--and realized that it was his turn to announce it.

"Well, um," Sam cleared his throat, "So Dean and I have been talking and you know we really love each other and stuff," Was he really this awkward? How had Dean told this stuff so passionately and nicely? "I mean, Dean's my everything you know? And he says that I'm his, so we just sort of figured. Like, we could get married when I graduated. So now we're engaged." That had come out in the worst possible way. "He makes me really happy and I mean, I couldn't imagine being with anybody else. Why should what other people think matter you know? I don't think it should. So, yeah, that's what we wanted to tell you. We're engaged." Sam smiled at the end, but his heart was still racing. 

His own Dean chuckled a little at him, but he hoped that he hadn't said it all too terribly. Sam bit his lip, waiting for the mens' responses.

"Well," the other nodded, "Okay."

"You two are a helluva lot more committed than we were at your age," Dean looked impressed with them. 

\---

Bobby, Mary, John, and Castiel sat around the table drinking coffe. Mary told Bobby about the boys' decision to get married. As much as he wanted to call them idjits, he couldn't help but feel like maybe they were making the right decision. It was nice getting to talk to everyone, but eventually Bobby and John headed out. Castiel and Mary told them goodbye, but then they were just alone.

"You want something to eat?" Mary offered, "Oh, nevermind," she chuckled, "You're an angel. Sorry." There hadn't been this tension the last time they were alone at the diner. Mary wasn't sure why it was so tense at the moment, but suddenly, she felt lost for words.

\---

Dean sat on one of the beds against the headboard, Sam nestled between his legs. In retrospect it probably wasn't the best position to be in as it had Sam's ass plastered against Dean's cock. The mere presence of Sam's ass against his groin was enough to have Dean start hardening in his jeans, and the little bastard knew it. Sam wiggled the smallest amount, but enough to have a groan slip past Dean's lips. "Mmm, sorry," he said, blush covering his face as he saw the amused looks covering the older Sam and Dean's faces. "Someone isn't behaving himself," the words were said with an amused grin against Sam's neck.

\---

Sam groaned inwardly, watching the two teens on the opposite bed. There was a part of him, a big part of him, that wanted to join them on the bed, pull his Dean with him and join them. 'What is wrong with me?' he wondered, staring intently at the couple sitting across from him. 

\---

Dean caught a flicker of something in the older Sam's eyes that made him shudder slightly, not in a bad way mind you, but it made his mind go places it shouldn't.

\---

Castiel smiled at Mary, part of him amused at her reactions, a bigger part confused. "While I don't need to eat, if feeding me would please you, you can make me some food. You are a dear friend to me and I would take pleasure in pleasing you." He noticed her blush increasing.

\---

Sam shuddered when Dean started pressing kisses against his neck. "Dean," he warned, feeling the mens' eyes on them. Dean mumbled something about not being able to resist him before continuing to suck marks onto his skin. Sam was trying to keep his focus on reality, but that got real hard when he could feel Dean's semi-hard cock pressing against his ass. He hadn't meant to start this. He knew that he should be horribly uncomfortable right now, but somehow he wasn't. For some reason, the men staring at them like this only make his heart race excitedly.

Dean's hands were starting to wander a little more, rubbing down the insides of his thighs and tracing over the lower part of Sam's stomach. He was no longer capable of coherent thoughts with all the teasing that Dean was doing.

\---

Dean felt the horribly need to palm himself, just to relieve the pressure that was increasing. "I think we'll uh, be going," Dean coughed, hit breath trying to hitch every time young Sam's slender hips gave a roll against the other Dean. "Since you two are uh--busy."

He and Sam walked over to the door, but there was this horrible, wrong part of Dean that didn't want to leave.

\---

"Oh no," Mary blushed at Cas' words, "I'm not going to make you eat." She chuckled and once again it sunk back into silence. 

Mary's breath got heavier when Castiel took a couple steps towards her. She could feel this aura about him and it felt like it was engulfing her too. Mary had discussed personal space with the angel before--the poor fellow had horrible perception about those sorts of things--but that's not what this felt like. Her fingers came up and traced around of the buttons on his trench coat. She wondered why he always wore the thing, but she had to admit that she had come to like it over the years.

\---

Dean rested his chin on Sam's shoulder, they shared a silent look. "Don't leave... I mean, you don't have to go... we can behave ourselves..." He realized he was babbling, blushing as he buried his face in Sam's neck. He hadn't been trying to drive the older men away, and part of him knew had it been anybody else with them he probably wouldn't have felt comfortable enough to do what he was doing. "Besides, you two are our ride from here. You really can't leave us."

\---

Sam swallowed, hearing the dejected tone in the teen's voice, there was something heartbreaking about it. Sam was trying to be a good man, was trying so damn bad to behave himself but there was something so appealing about the almost innocence the teens were showing in their sexuality. He looked over at his brother, trying to gauge his reaction.

\---

Castiel swallowed hard, looking down to Mary's hands. He was unsure of what was expected of him, part of him wishing Dean or Sam were there to explain this to him. He felt a stirring in his nether regions, and was amazed when a soft moan left his mouth. His hand reached up to cup Mary's cheek, fingertips brushing along the soft skin. He could hear her breathing begin to intensify at the action and was proud that HE was the one to do this to her. 

\---

Dean watched the two boys, still cuddled together on the bed. He couldn't deny how badly he wanted to stay, how much he wanted to feel a small Sam beneath him again. He ached for it a little. He also wanted his Sam too. Right now, Dean was just too full of want to think clearly. Honestly, he didn't want them to "behave" themselves. He wanted to be in on the action, having his own Sam by his side. He wanted to show the boys all these things that they didn't know yet. He wanted to see if their bodies had all the same sensitive spots. Dean wanted to compare and contrast and study and feel, but there was this annoying little part in his brain that just kept telling him it was wrong.

However, he saw his brother's gaze on him and that little part in his brain got a little quieter. Did Sam want to? Because if his Sammy wanted to, then he definitely wanted to. Damn, he wanted to actually get to watch Sam fuck him. There was a possibility that he might get to watch that with his own two eyes from an outsider's point of view. Which really should've turned him off--the thought of Sam being with somebody else--but it wasn't really someone else. It was still him, just in a different form.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. What the Hell was a man supposed to do?

\---

Mary could actually see Castiel's pulse point thumping on his neck. What was she thinking? All she wanted to do was pull him in by that silly, adorable coat of his and kiss him. She wanted to kiss an angel--now how crazy was that? For a second, she thought that she might. For a second, she could feel his breath on her skin. For a second, her hands gripped the coat's fabric tightly.

But it was only for a second.

She let go and took a step away. Mary knew that he cheeks were probably cherry red, so she ducked her head down. Here she was, trying to take advantage of an angel, forcing her own flaring emotions on him. She couldn't corrupt a heavenly being. She certainly couldn't corrupt the heavenly being who gave her this life, who gave her boys a chance in both lives, who was the entire reason that she was still around to see those boys. That wasn't right of her to do that. No matter how much she wanted to, it simply wasn't her place.

Castiel didn't know why Mary had pulled away from him, but he didn't like it. He reached back out to her, cupping her face in his hand, whispering, "I'm going to kiss you, please say that it is okay." He waited just long enough to see a look of confirmation in her eyes before leaning in and kissing her gently. He rested his other hand on the small of her back, pulling her to him as he took her mouth in a soft, yet passionate kiss. He smiled against her lips as a small moan escaped her lips, his hand moving to intertwine in her long blonde hair.

Castiel held her against him, lifting her off her feet as his tongue snaked into her mouth, learning her taste.

\---

Dean groaned, watching the hungry looks that crossed the older men's faces. He motioned to them with one hand, silently asking them to join him and Sam on the bed. His other hand was busy, trailing up and down Sam's chest under his t-shirt, causing the younger boy to moan in his lap. He nuzzled at Sam's neck, reaching out with his free hand. He looked up when he felt large fingers intertwining with his, Sam, and pulled his hand back, dragging the man with it. His Sam leaned his head back against Dean's shoulder, giving Dean freedom to lean forward to place a kiss on the older Sam's lips. 

Dean heard a groan and a muttered curse from the older Dean, pulling back long enough to see the man kneeling at the foot of the bed just watching them. He saw his Sam motion at Dean, the older man crawling up the bed to take Sam's lips in a searing kiss. Part of Dean wanted to be jealous of his Sam kissing the other Dean, but most of him was just turned on more than he had ever been before.

\---

Sam looked over to watch as his brother claimed the younger Sam's lips. A low moan left his lips at the sight, the way Dean mapped Sammy's lips with his lips and tongue driving Sam insane with lust. His hand snaked into the younger Dean's hair, god he had never seen his brother with hair as long as the boy's was, not that it was overly long just longer than Dean had ever worn his. He pulled Dean back towards him, taking the teen's lips once more in a kiss. Sam couldn't remember ever doing something so erotic in his life, his brother at his side, the two of them kissing two young beautiful boys. 

Sam's hand reached out, running along the younger Sam's chest, causing the boy and both Dean's to let out hungry moans of pleasure. He pulled back from Dean, leaning in to kiss and suck at the younger Sam's neck, causing the boy to arch up into him. The hand that he had had on Sammy's chest trailed downwards, cupping the boy through his jeans, causing the boy to shudder with want.

\---

John watched Bobby closely, part of him still feeling upset that the man had never told him about the darkness in the world. Upset that Bobby felt he couldn't tell John, couldn't ask him to help him. John realized it was irrational, why would Bobby have told him, Bobby had been protecting John and Dean from forces they couldn't begin to understand, but it troubled John. He should have been helping the man, should have fought the dark at his side. John swallowed hard at where those thoughts were leading, he was worried, worried that something would happen and John would never get a chance. A chance to what? Well that was a question John didn't want to look to closely to.

\---

Mary felt like all the breath had just been knocked out of her. She couldn't believe that Castiel had kissed her, really couldn't believe he had kissed her so--so perfectly. She felt sparks when his tongue grazed over hers. He even tasted different than anyone she had ever kissed. He tasted like something otherworldly. Mary couldn't believe how strong he was either. It wasn't that she had never seen him in action, she knew his strength--logically she knew. However, having him hold her like this, feeling his arms around her--it made her realize how simple his strength was. Castiel wasn't having to focus to hold her up, he was just doing it. 

"Castiel," she breathed out against his lips, "I...are you sure that you should be, that we should be kissing?" She felt so insecure about her feelings towards the angel. There was this worry in her head that she shouldn't be with such a divine creature, such a beautiful thing. This thing between them felt so fragile, like she could break it so easily if she wasn't careful.

\---

Sam was gasping at all the contact. Kisses and touches and licks and nips all over his skin. He couldn't even tell who it was. Sam felt so small being held up the older Dean's large frame. The man was strong and bulkier than his Dean, but it was those eyes that got him. He still had those same beautiful eyes and Sam couldn't stop rocking his hips just to see them flutter open and shut while his perfect mouth parted. 

Sam turned his head and saw that the large hand on his chest traced back to the other Sam. He could feel that the men had hunters hands--calloused, rough, but precise and gentle enough to stich someone up. He knew hands like that, he had hands like that. But then there was another hand, brushing against his face, and he knew that hand too. It was his Dean, and their eyes locked. Sam could tell that Dean was silently asking him if this was okay, if they could do this. Sam felt like he should say no, that they should stop, but he didn't want to. It didn't feel wrong. Sam strained to do it, but he caught his Dean's lips in a kiss--their tongues racing out to touch just once before they were pulled away by their much larger counterparts.

\---

Dean couldn't decide where to look. He wanted to look at Sam and his younger self--the way the man covered him completely and it was about to kill him just knowing that his baby brother could physically cover somebody. But then he wanted to look down at young Sammy, just looking up at him with hungry, wide eyes. So many memories were flooding back, and he finally decided on kissing the boy beneath him. Tongues teasing, testing, tasting each other. Dean's hands rucked the boys shirt up before tugging it off. He laced his fingers with his own Sam's--whose hand was still plastered onto Sammy's chest. It was weird touching both of them at the same time and knowing that Sam was feeling the same way. They were touching each other in double, the thought alone made Dean's head spin, the action was making his jeans feel more like a cell for criminals than an article of clothing.

"Sam," he heard the other Dean moan out softly and he knew exactly what his brother was doing. Dean knew how Sam could move his hips to make a person just arch and moan into the movement--he knew because that's what Sam always did to him.

\---

Bobby watched his friend's face, seeing the emotions there. "An idjit like you shouldn't be thinkin' so hard," he handed the man a beer, because if anything made John feel better, it was a nice cold beer.

\---

Dean pushed gently at Sam's chest. When the man backed away Dean yanked his shirt over his head, tossing it onto the floor. He was about to reach down to undo his jeans when a hand stopped his. He looked over to see the older Dean watching him with an appraising look, the man's hand resting at the fly of Dean's jeans. Dean nodded at his older self, biting his lip as he watched the man slowly unzip his pants. Dean groaned as his jeans were removed from his body, the older Dean's hand wrapping around his hard length. "Oh, fuck," Dean moaned, his hips arching into the touch.

Dean heard his Sammy panting, and looked over to watch as the older Sam engulfed his Sam's cock in his mouth. A whimper passed his lips, watching with lust clouded eyes as his beloved Sam was pleasured by an older, larger version of himself. Dean felt a hand cup his face and he turned away from watching the Sams to gaze into the emerald gaze of the older Dean. His hand snaked up to tangle in the man's short locks as their lips met in a fiery kiss. He reached down with the hand not busy and grasped at Dean's ass, fingers digging into the denim encased muscles. "Off, take them off," he moaned shoving at the denim.

He could see the older Sam reach over and undo his brother's jeans, tugging at them until the elder Dean kicked them off. As soon as the pants were off, Dean grabbed the fleshy mound again, groaning with pleasure when the older Dean thrust down against him, their cocks lining up, sending shocks of pleasure through Dean's body.

Dean could hear the small breathy moans coming from his Sam, the sounds going straight to his cock.

\---

Sam hummed around Sammy's cock, holding the boy down on the bed by his hips, the feeling of the boy thrusting up into his mouth overwhelming him. He looked up, eyes locking with the boy's briefly as he trailed one hand up the boy's body. His fingers brushed against Sammy's lips, the boy opening his mouth to allow Sam to slip the digits inside. Sam groaned around the boy's cock as Sammy twirled his tongue around the fingers as if he was sucking a cock. He pulled off briefly, whispering, "God, Baby, you are so fucking hot," before sinking down on the boy once more. He gently shoved Sammy's thighs apart, his wet fingers moving to tease at the boy's hole. 

\---

"Oh, fucking god," Dean cursed, watching as the older Sam, the only one of them still clothed, stretched and teased his Sammy's body open. Dean's thighs shifted open, letting the older Dean's body settle between them. He thrust up against the man, his legs wrapping around the older version of himself's hips. 

Sammy moaned feeling nothing but tongue and fingers. He never knew that sex with...with himself could feel so fucking good. Then again, he wasn't sure why he was so surprised. Sam knew everything that he liked, because they were sort of the same. 

However, it was his hands that got him going. Sam's hands were large and strong. One still hand a bruise inducing grip on his hip--practically able to wrap around half of Sammy's slender body. The other hand had thick fingers that were currently making Sammy wonder which way he needed to move his hips. Forwards into that perfect, wet heat? Backwards towards those skillful fingers? He opted for letting Sam just hold him there, his grip keeping Sammy from being able to move much anyways.

He turned his head briefly and saw Dean and Dean kissing passionately. It made him groan, because he was watching to two most beautiful people in the universe make out--and fuck if Sam didn't back off a little he was going to cum way too soon.

\---

Dean couldn't believe how good it all felt. Young Dean's cock leaking and rubbing against his own. The friction was amazing, but not quite enough. When he glanced over at the Sams. His eyes locked with Sammy's. The boy was staring hungrily--eyes barely even hazel anymore--at him and his younger self. He gave the kid a wink before diving back down and kissing Dean again. If Sammy wanted a show, he could give him a show.

"Fuck Dean," he let out a breathy moan--it felt a little odd to say his own name. "Gonna make you feel so good, know just what you like," He slipped a hand between them and gripped both their cocks together. A single tug had his younger self throwing his head back against the pillow. Turns out, their bodies were extremely similar. Every little spot that Dean knew he liked, the other Dean was also a fan of. He had the teen moaning and writhing beneath him. Dean would bring him right up to the edge, see that 'I'm gonna cum' look on his face, and let go of his cock. The poor kid was almost sobbing with want, but when he looked over Sammy's hands were tangled in Sam's hair--and Sam's fingers were currently working the boy open while his mouth was going to town on the boy's cock--but Sammy's eyes were still locked on him and the other Dean.

Even though Dean kept bringing his younger self to the edge over and over, he'd never seen anyone look as desperate as Sammy did. The kid was trying to keep his eyes open to watch his Dean, but could barely handle it--Dean couldn't blame him, he knew how Sam's mouth felt. When he glanced down, he noticed that Sam had his cock out--button and zipper on his jeans undone. God, Dean was going to end up cumming before he ever go to fuck someone.


	7. Lust and Aggression

Dean groaned, thrusting up against the older version of himself, hands running down the man's back. He wanted, no needed to feel the older man inside of him. "Dean, come on, fuck me," he whispered, the words causing his Sammy to let out a loud moan. 

Dean hooked his legs around the older man, arching his hips up, letting him know how much he wanted this. He let out a groan of pleasure when he felt Dean's fingers at his opening, teasing the tight ring of muscle. "Mmm, stop teasing. Need you in me, god, please, need to feel it."

\---

Sam smiled down at the panting boy under him, Sammy looking so willing and wanting beneath him. The words coming from the teenage Dean's mouth were driving Sam insane. Sam grabbed his cock, resting one hand on Sammy's stomach as he lined himself up. The tightness that surrounded him was intense and Sam knew that this wasn't going to last long. When Sammy clenched around his hard shaft, Sam let out a loud moan of pleasure. He held onto the boy's hips, knowing that there were going to be bruises there after they were done, but Sam didn't care. All that mattered was the feeling of the body underneath his, the way the boy arched into every thrust, panting and moaning so prettily. 

He set a brutal pace, cock slamming into the boy again and again and again, each thrust brushing against the younger Sam's prostate. "God, so pretty, so fucking tight," Sam moaned, leaning to kiss the boy. "Gonna fill you up, Baby, gonna cum so deep inside of you." His thrusting intensified, fucking hard into the willing boy, "Fuck, Sammy, love..." he groaned as he came deep inside the boy, filling him with spurt after spurt of his hot cum. 

Dean lined himself up; he could hear that Sam was getting close already--and he knew from experience exactly why. He pressed into the teen slowly, making sure not to hurt him. He couldn't believe the way that Dean was arching up into him, little pleads falling from his lips. Once he was in all the way, he leaned forward to kiss the boy. The boy started to wrap his arms around Dean, but Dean grabbed his wrists. "Gonna make you beg for it," he pinned the boys wrists above his head. "Know how much you like to," he said with a wink before pulling out just any only to thrust back in.

It didn't take long for Dean to set a quick pace, he wasn't even noticing how much he was moaning in response to the boy's noises. When he heard his brother cum, it almost shoved him over the edge. Sam always had that affect on him. "Come on Dean, need to hear you, wanna make you cum so hard Baby," his grip tightened around Dean's wrists.

\---

Sammy gasped because he could feel Sam's cum inside him. The man gave a few more thrusts, but his hands never stopped moving on Sam's cock. Sammy could barely breathe because this was all too much. He could hear his brother moaning and gasping, knew that he was getting close. He hissed when Sam pulled out, but it soon turned into a moan when he was once again in Sam's mouth. Sammy couldn't stop his hips from bucking up, he was too needy and desperate at this point, but Sam just took it, swallowed him down. 

Fisting his hand in Sam's hair, he groaned at the feel of it. He suddenly realized why Dean was always talking him out of getting a haircut. He was so close and Sam wasn't letting up at all. "Fuck! S-Sam!" he moaned, "Dean! Sam!" he repeated both of the names as he came in Sam's mouth. He whimpered and whined because it almost felt too good, the pleasure bordering on pain.

Dean let out a loud moan as the older Dean's cock hit his prostate on every single thrust. "Oh, god, oh, god, oh fuck, mmm, harder, god fuck me harder you bastard I'm not gonna break." He arched up against the older man, his cock trapped between them, the friction being not quite enough. He was trembling with want, practically screaming out Sam and Dean and Sammy's names as he tried to find his completion. 

\---

Sam grabbed Sammy gently, pulling the boy against his chest and turning them to face the Deans. Sam's brother was setting a harsh pace, his muscles shaking in a way that Sam knew meant he was close. And the teenage Dean, he was practically bucking off the bed, his hands still pinned above him. Sam whispered in Sammy's ear, "They are so pretty together aren't they."

His hands trailed along Sammy's chest and stomach, brushing against his already hard again length, 'Oh, the stamina of youth,' as they watched their brothers coupling. There was something so erotic watching the two men, how alike and yet so different they were, the way they moved together. Sam groaned, feeling himself start to harden again, biting his lips as Dean's thrusts intensified.

Dean could see how close the teen was and gave his leaking cock a couple strokes before the kid came over his stomach. The way Dean's muscles fluttered around him pushed him over the edge. His own orgasm slamming into him. He let go of the boy's wrists so he could grip onto his hips, shoving into the boy a few more times. He dropped forward, breathing heavily. He could honestly say that he had never had an experience quite like this one.

When he pulled out he heard the other Dean groan at the movement. He looked over and saw Sam sliding his hands gently over Sammy's body--the boy already hard again and it made his own dick give a helpless twitch. Tonight wasn't over was it? Damn, Dean really hoped it wasn't.

\---

Sammy was wriggling understand Sam's long fingers. They were tracing across his skin in little ticklish patterns that somehow managed to turn him on. But that wasn't the only thing that was getting him going again. Watching his brother cum like this was certainly aiding things along. He'd never seen Dean look so fucking perfect as he did right now with his chest flushed, his breathing heavy, cum on his stomach, and his eyes glazed over. Sam was going crazy just watching him.

Dean reached his hand out, grasping Sammy's, letting their fingers intertwine. He gave a sharp tug, pulling his fiance towards him. He was still trembling with aftershocks, but he needed to feel Sammy against him. Dean kissed the younger boy, his fingers carding through his silky hair. Sammy moaned against his lips, causing Dean's cock to twitch with interest. He shoved Sammy onto his back, covering the smaller teen with his body, lips sucking at Sammy's throat, leaving a dark mark under them. 

Dean cursed when Sammy arched up against him, the boy's legs moving to wrap around his hips. Sammy was so needy and wanton, it was hard to remember that he had been a virgin only two days prior. Dean's cock had swollen back to hardness and he let out a low moan as he slipped inside Sammy's still loose passage, his cock sliding in easily because of Sam's cum in the boy. "Oh, fuck, Baby Boy, so good," he whispered against Sammy's lips, rocking into the boy with slow, gentle thrusts. 

Dean groaned when he felt a large hand caressing his ass, Sam.

\---

Sam bit back a groan watching as the younger Dean slowly made love to his Sammy. He could tell that that was exactly what they were doing, the slow gentle thrusts as the teen thrust into his beloved. Sam could see his brother watching them from the other side, his hand reaching over them to snake into Sam's hair. Sam leaned across the boys, his hand resting on the younger Dean's ass, gently caressing it, as he met his brother's lips in a passion filled kiss. 

Sam's cock was hard again, and he groaned when he felt a smaller hand wrap around the length, Sammy. Sam moved away briefly, moving over to the side of the bed his brother was on. He lay on his back, moaning against Dean's lips when the older male straddled his thighs, Dean's tight hole brushing against the tip of Sam's cock.

Sam arched his neck as Dean trailed kisses along his throat, his body tight with arousal. "Dean, wanna fuck you," Sam moaned, arching against his brother.

"Love you Dean," Sammy moved with the gentle rhythm Dean had set. He made little whimpers every time that Dean would push back into him; nothing felt as good as Dean. He pulled the older boy down to crash their lips together, swallowing each other moans and their tongues sliding against each other frantically. Sammy started moving his hips a little faster, but Dean's hands held them still--continuing his excruciatingly slow pace. He pulled away from the kiss to let out a whine of need.

"Dean, come on," he bit his lip, "need you, need you so bad," Sammy moved his hand down to stroke his cock, but Dean gave him a warning look, and he pulled his hand away. Fuck, Sammy had already gone one round and now Dean was going to tease him? 

\---

Dean sank down on his brother's cock slowly to let himself adjust. Once he was all the way down, skin on skin contact, he let his head fall back and let out a contented sigh. His head was spinning, drunk off his last orgasm and now the feeling of Sam inside him. He began to rock his hips a little, just enjoying the feel. Sam's hands were rubbing up and down his sides and torso, occasionally slipping down to give his cock a tug.

"So fucking pretty Dean," he heard Sam say under his breath and he looked down to meet those dark, hazel eyes. 

The room felt like it was 1000 degrees, but in the best way possible. He could hear Sammy and the other Dean moaning and moving together. He knew that they could hear him and Sam moaning and moving together. They were right beside each other and yet off in their own little worlds at the same time. It was just about how much they loved each other. This whole thing was just about the connection that Sam and Dean's souls had no matter where they were or what form they took. Somehow, that just turned Dean on more.

Dean leaned in to whisper in Sammy's ear, "Love you too, Baby, need you. But I... I want this to last, need you to see how much you mean to me." If anything his thrusts became slower and more drawn out, Dean knowing that he was going to have scratches down his back from the way Sammy was dragging his fingers down the toned flesh. "Don't want this to end, never want this to stop. You feel, you are amazing, Sammy. Everything, everything I could have ever wished for. If I could, I'd keep us in bed at all times, so we could just," hard thrust, "make," roll of hips, "love," pulled back until he was almost out of Sammy, before slamming back in, his thrusts intensifying, no longer able to keep up the slow pace, "to you all day long."

Dean could hear moaning from next to him and looked over briefly to watch the elder Dean riding Sam's hard cock. A moan escaped his lips at the sight and he returned his focus to his Sammy, his thrusts becoming erratic, the boy shoving himself back onto Dean's cock with every single thrust. Sammy's hands had snaked into Dean's hair, pulling him down so their lips could meet once more. He growled with lust when he felt Sammy tense under him and Sammy cumming hard between their bodies.

\---

Sam moaned loudly, watching in awe as Dean rode his hard length. One of his hands rested on Dean's hip, the wrapped itself around Dean's hard cock. Sam let Dean set the pace of their union, eyes locked on the older man's as Dean slid up and down on his ridged flesh. "Dean, I love you so much," he whispered, his hips arching up to shove himself farther into the older hunter. "Love you more than anything in this world or any other."

Sammy couldn't hold back his orgasm; he wrapped his arms around Dean, just needing the support. He was pretty sure that he was probably moaning out Dean's name way too loud. Dean pressed into him a few more times before his muscles tensed and Sammy stared intently at Dean's face. It was so perfect and beautiful when he was like this--completely consumed with pleasure. It made happiness and pride swell up in Sammy's chest that he was the one who did that to Dean.

When Dean's body relaxed, Sammy pulled him down on top of him, running his hands up and down the boy's spine. He pressed kisses onto freckle-covered shoulders and breathed in the scent of Dean.

\---

Dean watched the taut muscles in Sam's body stretching and moving as Dean rode him. Sam's hand worked Dean's cock with perfect strokes, forcing Dean to close his eyes with pleasure. He heard his other self cumming, and he started moving faster. He smirked when he heard how Sam's moans got louder and more frequent. Dean started clenching around Sam's cock, just to draw out more of those perfect noises. God, he had missed this. Missed having his Sam sprawled out beneath him.

\---  
Castiel moved them until they reached the couch, setting Mary down gently. He was feeling things he had never felt before, both physically and emotionally. There was something about the woman that called to him, that made him want to do whatever it took to make her smile, to please her. "Mary," he whispered against her lips, "is this alright with you. Am I allowed to do this?" 

He needed her approval of this change in their relationship, needed more than he thought he could need anything. A deep down voice in his mind whispered that what he was feeling was love, though Castiel really wasn't listening to that tiny voice, the voice that sounded so much like Jimmy Novak.

\---

John nursed his beer, staring at the table. This weekend had been one of the worse ones he could remember, and yet it was also one of the best. He had re-met up with the woman who had once been the love of his life and finally had gotten answers to the questions that had been plaguing him for years, he had gotten closure to their relationship, both of them knowing that what they had shared would always be dear to them, but the time for those feelings had long passed. 

He had gotten to meet the son he hadn't known about, a boy he had already considered family. He had watched his son stand up for what he believed in, becoming a better man than John had ever been. He had met an angel and been possessed by a demon, both of who showed him that there was still much he needed to learn. 

John could tell that the angel, Castiel had feelings for Mary, feelings he probably didn't understand, and while a tiny piece of John felt jealous about it, he knew that without the angel's interference, Mary would be dead and Sam, Dean, and he would be living a life that would end up almost destroying them all.

John looked across the table, smiling at Bobby. The other man who had been a dear friend to him for years, a second father to Dean, had also been a father figure for Sammy. John had considered the man family for years, hell Bobby had offered John to come and move in by him after Dean graduated and went off to college. Part of John knew where their relationship was heading and it terrified him, but he knew he could trust the man, he had never done anything that wasn't in the best interest of a Winchester.

"You look like you got something on you mind," Bobby watched his friend sipping his bear--which that alone was unusual, considering that normally he would've already finished it and been drinking another. He knew that this weekend hadn't exactly been easy on the man. After all, John had found his ex-wife, a new son, his sons from a different world, an angel, been possessed by a demon, had his two sons announce they were getting married someday, and laid a hand on his boy. Bobby felt safe to assume that John was overwhelmed. Who wouldn't be?

Part of Bobby felt guilty for never telling John about everything. He could've saved him some of the shock, but he hadn't wanted to bring his friend into this world. A world full of monsters and death--John didn't need any of that. However, now he supposed it didn't matter. John knew about everything and Bobby wondered if the man would ever get another night's sleep.

\---

"Castiel, I--" Mary's voice hitched in her throat, "I'm not sure that we should be doing this." She watched the angel's face drop and she quickly put her hand up to his cheek, "No, no, no! Not because...Believe me, I want this, but..." She bit her lip.

It had been years since Mary had been in a relationship of any kind. She had sworn off love like that. Mary put all of her focus on Sam and hunting. Sure, she had the occasional thoughts about the angel that saved her life--and her son's. Sure, maybe those thoughts were a little more than occasional. But she wasn't sure that she could do this. Odds were, Castiel would leave sometime soon. They wouldn't be able to stay in this world forever, and Mary didn't want to get too attached only to have Cas ripped away from her. She wasn't sure how to go about telling Cas why they couldn't be together, she wondered if he would even be able to understand. If she ended it now though, he wouldn't have to be hurt either. She didn't want him to have a broken heart or have to make decisions based on her. Castiel was an angel, he had things that he had to do. He couldn't be thinking of her when he made decisions. 

Dean curled around Sammy, a smile on his face. He glanced over the younger boy's shoulder, noticing the clock on the nightstand read 9:30 PM. They had spent the whole afternoon and evening in bed, and still hadn't gotten anything to eat, a fact his body made clear as his stomach rumbled loudly. He heard the others laugh, and laughed along with them, pulling away from Sammy with a grin. "We really should go get supper," he said, chuckling, receiving nods and laughter in response.

The four males dressed, sharing kisses and touches as they did so, and by the time they finally stumbled out of the motel it was almost midnight as the touches had sparked another round of play. They picked up hamburgers, fries, shakes, and pie at the diner across the way, before heading back to Mary's house. 

There were few lights on in the house so they entered quietly, only to catch a blushing Mary and Castiel pulling away from each other from what had appeared to be a pretty heavy make out session. Dean ran home long enough to grab his school bag and some clothes for the following day, nodding at his father and Bobby who were watching an action flick on the couch drinking beers, and then driving his car over to park in Mary's driveway. 

The four of them ate their dinner in relative silence, Mary and Castiel joining them, before Sam and Dean stood up to head back to the motel for the rest of the night. Dean had popped his head back inside, giving the younger Dean a thumbs up after he had seen the teen's car.

Mary didn't question where the boys had been, only giving them both hugs and telling them that they might want to shower before heading to bed with an amused grin on her face.

Sam stared at the angel. He liked him well enough, he'd even become fond of him over the past couple days. However, catching him making out with Sam's own mom was a little weird. He wasn't sure how he felt about that. Part of him was angered because he always felt the need to protect his mom--and protecting her from an angel might prove to be difficult. But a part of him was kind of happy for her. She had been single pretty much Sam's whole life--with the exception of a few lone men here and there over the years.

When it came down to it, he just wanted his mom to be happy. His mom left the room, telling to boys to shower, and Castiel followed her like a puppy. Sam would've judged that, but he guessed that was most likely how he looked following Dean around all the time.

"Gonna go take a shower," Sam said realizing how tired he sounded.

\---

Mary heard the angel's soft steps behind her. She thought that maybe she should tell him that he shouldn't be in her room. She thought maybe she should tell him that she was going to bed. She thought a lot of things that she should tell him.

Mary opted out of all of those things. Instead, she pulled the angel in for a kiss. She could tell he was surprised, but that seemed to make her happier. He was the one who had kissed her first, but now she was turning things around. All the doubts she had were melting away. Mary cared for Castiel. Really cared for him. Over the years, he had become one of the few constants in her life. Cas would appear at random times, just to check on her when he knew that Sammy wasn't around. She supposed that she should've seen this coming. Their friendship had grown and developed so much and now it had formed into something else. When she pulled away, she grinned at how wide Castiel's shiny blue eyes were.

Dean followed Sammy into the bathroom, knowing the younger teen was dead on his feet. He helped him undress, pulled two towels out of the linen closet, then turned on the shower, adjusting the temperature to just how Sammy liked it. Dean quickly undressed, pulling an unresisting Sammy into the shower, an arm wrapped around the boy's chest to hold him up. He reached over, grabbing the soap and a washcloth, and silently began cleaning his beloved's body. He placed a gentle kiss on Sammy's cheek when the boy arched back against him, "Mmm, as inviting as an offer that is, Baby, both of us are too tired to play. Just wanna get cleaned up and head to bed." 

Dean quickly finished cleaning Sammy's body, the moved him to rest against the wall while Dean washed himself. Dean groaned at the heated look in Sammy's tired eyes, wishing he was awake enough to take him up on what was being offered. He grabbed the shampoo, pulling Sammy back against his chest, his hands tangling in Sammy's silky locks as he washed the boy's hair. After he had finished washing his lover's hair he quickly did his own and turned off the shower. 

Dean helped Sammy out of the shower, grabbing one of the towels and drying off his body, only pausing briefly to place adoring kisses on Sammy's scars. He grabbed the other towel and dried off, wrapping the fluffy cloth around his waist and doing the same to Sammy. They walked in silence to Sammy's room, and Dean pulled out sleep pants for both of them, pulling his on before turning to go back into the bathroom and collect their dirty clothes. By the time he got back to the bedroom, Sammy was already curled up under the covers, half asleep. Dean set their laundry down, crawling in bed next to the younger boy. 

He lay down on his back, Sammy quickly moving to rest his head on his shoulder. Dean sat up briefly, causing Sammy to grumble, and leaned across to set the alarm for the morning. He laid back down, and Sammy returned to his previous position, head resting over Dean's heart, the sound lulling him to sleep. Dean fell asleep to the soft sounds of Sammy breathing in his sleep, a smile covering his tired face.

The alarm clock went off loudly, too loud. Sam groaned unhappily, reaching over Dean to smack the snooze button before snuggling back up into Dean's chest. His head ached with lack of sleep and his muscles ached from the night before's activities--which made Sam almost smile. Sam felt Dean shift a little underneath him, finally waking up a little. "No," Sammy mumbled, holding Dean closer, "don't wanna get'tup." He heard the older boy huff out a laugh, but Dean stayed close.

Turned out, five more minutes from the snooze button wasn't nearly enough to make up for the exhaustion. Sammy rolled over on his mattress and forced his legs to move so he could get out of bed. His eyes felt grainy, but he pulled on a pair of--most likely--clean jeans and hunted around for a shirt. A pair of hands pulled him back against Dean's sleep-warm chest. Dean proceded to press lazy kisses onto the darkening hickies scattered over Sam's neck. As desperate as Sam wanted Dean at the moment, he pulled away from the warm embrace. "You're gonna get me all riled up before I even get dressed," he smiled and kissed Dean on the lips chastely after pulling an undershirt on. Sam searched until he found a flannel and slid his arms through it.

\---

Dean attempted to move, but soon realized that he couldn't. Sam's very large frame was practically draped over him, and the man groaned every time Dean shifted. He glanced over at the clock and realized how early it was. He had plenty of time to sleep, but his bladder was threatening to explode any second. "Move ya big giant," Dean shoved at his brother until Sam rolled over. 

"Big giant is redundant," Sam grumbled into his pillow.

With a roll of his eyes, Dean got out of bed and went to the bathroom. On his way back, he noticed how messy the other bed was, and it made him grin. Last night had been interesting to say the least. He snuggled back under the covers. Big arms pulled him towards Sam and Dean rested his head on Sam's chest. They'd never really laid like this, but Dean liked it. He felt safe and warm.

\---

Mary woke up with Castiel lying still underneath her head. They hadn't really done anything last night outside of kissing and cuddling. Mary supposed that she had fallen asleep some point during all of that. She grinned because he had stayed, curled up with her, even though he didn't need to sleep. There had been no reason for him to lay there all night, so that had to mean something right?

"Did I wake you?" he asked in a quiet, cautious voice.

"No," she propped her chin on his chest, smiling up at him, "it's just been a long time since I've woken up like this."

Dean smiled tiredly as he walked down the hallway towards his locker. A few of the kids he used to hang out with were staring at him, Dean knew he was a sight. His neck was almost completely covered in hickies and there was a definite difference in his steps. He stopped at his locker, grabbing only what he needed before moving as quick as he could to the hall where Sam's locker was.

He found Sam standing in front of his locker, pulling out books, and eyed him favorably. He closed in, coming up from behind Sam, pressing his body against the younger teens back, before leaning in to nuzzle and kiss at his neck. "We still on for lunch," he whispered huskily into Sam's ear, feeling the tremors of lust that passed through the younger boy. Sam nodded against him, causing Dean to let out a quiet moan in Sam's ear. "Mmm, can't wait, Baby, you and me, doing what we planned. I'm gonna be hard all day just thinking about it."

Sam turned in his arms, and Dean cupped his chin in his hand, stroking the soft skin under his fingertips before leaning in the rest of the rest of the way to claim Sam's lips in a bruising, claiming kiss. Dean pulled away with a smirk, hand lingering on Sam's cheek before pulling completely away. "Until later, Baby," he said loud enough that everyone within a few feet of them could hear the words.

Dean walked down the hall, a grin on his face. He was stopped halfway to his first period classroom by Nate, a member of the football team and a guy Dean had known since they were in kindergarten. 

"Winchester, what the hell is going on with you man? I mean first you quit the team and now you're making out with your kid brother."

Dean rose his eyebrow at that, "Who said that Sam Campbell was my brother?"

Nate laughed, "Dude, that's what everyone says, I mean why else would you be hanging out with a freshman, a loser freshman to make matters worse."

Dean glared at the other boy, hands clenching into fists, "Take that back. Sam is not a loser. He is better than everyone in this god damned school, and I hear you talk about my boyfriend that way again I will kick your ass. Do I make myself clear."

The other teen's eyes widened at Dean's words, "Oh, shit, we all just thought he was like your kid brother or something, that's why he was always hanging around you. I didn't know he was your boyfriend, though, Dude, that kid is jailbait. His parents find out... well let's just say you would be so screwed."

Dean let out a loud laugh, drawing the attention of some of his classmates who were walking by, "His father really isn't part of his life, and his mom thinks I'm adorable. Hell, I spent all weekend with him, which she knew about. Seriously, Dude, we're good. But I hear anyone talking shit about my boyfriend, my fiance, again... well let's just say that I'm not the only one you are gonna wanna watch out for."

Dean walked away with a smirk on his face, walking into the classroom, leaving stunned fellow classmates behind him.

Sam stood around, stunned for a moment. The hallway cleared out but he was still having trouble moving. He knew that Dean was going to do it, so that wasn't the part that surprised him. It was just the whole situation. He felt overwhelmed because Dean had just kissed him in the hallway and it was possibly the best thing that had ever happened to Sam. No, he was pretty sure that it was the best thing to happen to him.

The bell rang and he got to class late. When the teacher asked him where he was some girl responded, "He was too busy making out in the hall!" Sam's cheeks turned bright red, but the teacher didn't pressure him. He guessed that she probably figured the embarrassment was enough for the tardy.

"So you and Dean Winchester huh?" the girl who sat in front of him turned around after the teacher started talking.

"Uh," Sam ducked his head, "Yeah."

"Never thought he'd go for a little freshman," she shrugged, "let alone you. No offense, it's just." She suddenly looked like she realized she had said too much.

"No, I get it," Sam answered and he did get it. He wasn't the cool kid by any means, certainly not compared to Dean. Although, he was the one who was going to spend some quality time with Dean at lunch...which was more than good enough for him not to care about his popularity status.

Dean anxiously waited for lunchtime to arrive, thankful for wearing lose pants that day. As soon as the bell rang he raced to his locker, tossing his books inside, and made his way out the front doors towards his car. He grinned when he noticed that Sam was already there, sitting in the backseat with a grin on his face. Dean crawled in back, kissing Sam hard, his hand reaching down to fondle his beloved through his pants before popping open the button and unzipping them.

Dean licked his lips as he bent down, his tongue snaking out to lick at the tip. Sam's hands grabbed at his head, the other boy impatiently shoving him down along his hard length. He moaned around Sam's straining flesh, his hands stroking whatever part of Sam he could touch. Dean knew they didn't have a lot of time, so he set a fast pace, sucking Sam's cock in a way he knew would get him off quickly.

\---

Abby knew she shouldn't have followed Dean, but she had to know, had to know if the rumors were true about him and Sam Campbell. The two had been practically inseparable since the school year had started, yet no one had questioned it, they had all just assumed that the two were brothers. Until this morning that is, when Dean was seen kissing and sucking on the younger boy's neck at his locker, and had been confronted by Nate. Dean had said that Sam was his boyfriend, no, not just boyfriend, fiance. Abby hoped that that wasn't true, that he had been misunderstood when he was talking with Nate, Dean couldn't be engaged, and not to a lowly freshman at any rate.

She watched as Dean slipped into the car, watched as he kissed Sam, a kiss that spoke volumes, a kiss that she could tell was one of love and devotion. And then, then Dean sunk out of her line of sight, and the look on Sam's face gave away just what Dean was doing to him.

\---

Dean chuckled, yanking Sam's pants farther down his hips, "Can't wait, need to be in you." He bit out a curse when Sam pulled his legs against his chest, the jeans hanging off of one ankle. "Mmm, so needy, aren't you, Baby," Dean whispered, brushing his hand across Sam's cheek as he undid his jeans. Dean swallowed hard, positioning himself between Sam's legs, and slid in with one fast thrust. "Oh, fuck, Sammy, not gonna last long, been hard all day, been thinking about this."

He groaned as Sam let out a moan of pleasure, the younger teen arching back into every single one of his thrusts. Neither one was gonna last long, too worked up. Dean wrapped his hand around Sam's cock, pulling it in fast strokes as Dean thrust into his willing body. Sam reached up and pulled Dean down, their lips meeting in a bruising kiss. "Oh, God, Sammy, yes," Dean moaned, feeling Sam clench around him as he came hard between their bodies. Dean followed quickly, panting and moaning against Sam's lips, his hand milking every last drop of cum out of Sam's cock. He fell against Sam, kissing him gently before pulling away with a groan.

They lay there for a few moments, before getting redressed. They stumbled out of the car, both of them grinning like loons as they walked back towards the school. Dean stopped at his locker, pulling out his lunch and went to sit in their spot. They ate quickly, every so often pausing for a quick kiss or two, and both of them let out sighs of frustration when the bell rang, signaling them that they had to get to class.

Dean walked into his next class, and sat down with a grin. His lab partner, Abby, sat next to him, staring, a blush covering her face, but Dean was in way too good a mood to question it. All and all it had been a good day so far.

Sam was shifting uncomfortably when he got in his next class. He was trying to put all his focus on the english notes on the board, but he couldn't stop thinking about Dean and this whole day. In one day, Dean had kissed him for everyone to see and they'd had sex in the car. He was on fucking cloud nine at the moment--although being on cloud nine was starting to make his pants feel a little snug.

"Sam can you break this sentence down into its separate parts?" The teacher had obviously called on his because he hadn't been paying attention.

"Uh," he read the sentence and thought for a moment. She gave him a small smile when he answered correctly and moved on to the next victim to break down more sentences.  
He couldn't wait for school to be done and over with. He was dying to see Dean. Sam could feel that people would occasionally stare, he knew that they were talking about him. Honestly, this was the first time that anyone was talking about him where they weren't just calling him a loser. Granted, he didn't tell Dean about that much. Dean didn't need to worry. Kids would be kids, Sam was used to the occasional bullying. Hell, sometimes he felt like people were justified. If anything, they had no idea how much of a freak he truly was. But it felt nice that people were a little bit impressed.

\---

Abby couldn't stop staring at Dean--the poor girl overwhelmed by what she had witnessed. He worked on their lab with a grin on his face, she knew what that was from, and his pencil scribbled away on the paper. She was actually impressed that he was working. Normally, she would poke and prod him until he worked. Not that she minded, it just gave her an excuse to touch him--which was never, not ever, a bad thing. But now, he was just working diligently, asking her questions as needed.

"You seem awfully..." she paused, "happy today." Oh, she knew why, but she was curious to see what he would say.

"Yeah," Dean nodded at her, his grin only widening.

She was about to to ask another question, but the bell rang and she didn't get a chance.

\---

Finally, Sam had gotten through the last couple hours of the day. He hurried to his locker, shoving a few books inside and noticing that he should probably clean it soon. Sam saw a trashcan across the hall and thought he should give it a quick little clearing out. He grabbed up the extra papers and candy wrappers and all the other things, tossing them into the trash. By the time he finished, the hallway had cleared out and he realized that Dean was probably still waiting for him by the car. 'Dammit,' he scolded himself, throwing his bag over his shoulder.

It should've been a simple walk out to the car. Every other day had always been just a walk out to the car. Sam supposed that there was always a chance for days to be different.

"Hey faggot!" somebody shouted from behind him.

Sam could hear more than one set of footsteps coming up from behind him. Yeah, today wasn't going to be so simple.

"You say it like it's a bad thing," Sam rolled his eyes and turned out. There were three of them, so it wasn't that bad. He could take a beating, frequently did what with being a hunter and all. Sam usually didn't fight back against people like this, he had no reason to. They would get angry, throw a few punches, and then it was over and Sam could go home. One of them mumbled something about 'smartass little prick' before taking a swing. Sam dodged it, but missed the next dodge because he turned to see Dean running towards them. 

"Thought you were one of us Winchester, but I guess not huh?" the tallest one giving Dean a shove, "Turns out you're a little faggot just like Campbell."

Sam scrambled up from the ground, Dean had shoved the kid back--yelling some remark to him. But his hearing turned into a loud ringing sound when he watched the boy hit Dean's face. Suddenly, it felt like everything else in the world had disappeared, because nobody hit Dean. Nobody hurt Dean, not ever. Sam had nearly went over and killed John after he smacked Dean, so he sure as hell wasn't letting these idiot kids hurt Dean.

Sam just lost it. He wasn't even sure what he was doing, but he was pulling out every combat move that he knew. Once he got the kid on the ground, he noticed that the other two boys were running away--smart move on their part. Sam couldn't feel his hands anymore, they were just moving. He hit the boy repeatedly, just over and over. Sam knew that his fist was probably bleeding--maybe even broken--but he didn't care. All he could think about what the fact that this kid had hurt his Dean. And so the punches get coming, his ears were ringing louder and louder, his body felt numb, and his sight had gone fuzzy. He was running on pure adrenaline.

"Sam! Sammy!" Suddenly, a noise got through the loud ringing--which triggered the rest of his senses to come back. Dean was yanking on him, trying to pull him off of the kid. Sam realized that the kid wasn't struggling against him anymore, just making groans from the pain. "Sam, you're gonna fucking kill him!" Dean was shouting at him, his voice hoarse, and Sam wondered how long Dean had been screaming for him to stop. He wondered when he had gotten out of control. The worst part was that Sam kind of wanted to kill him. 

He stood up from the ground where he had pummeled the kid. There was a hint of pride in his chest, but then he looked at Dean. Normally, there was nothing was passion and adoration and love in those eyes, but it wasn't like that now. Dean was looking at him with terror in his eyes, fear in his face. Dean was scared of him. He had scared Dean and then everything sank in. He hadn't gotten out of control like that in such a long time. Mary had pulled him out of a few schools because of things like this--times when it got to be too much or when he felt like people were threatening his family or friends (the few that he did get). Being a hunter forced you to be violent sometimes, but for Sam, it was different. Sometimes he liked the way it felt to kill something, not that he'd ever admit that.

"Dean, I," Sam reached out to touch Dean, but the boy flinched away subtly and Sam dropped his hand--which was bleeding and throbbing and hurt like a bitch at the moment. 

Dean's face was throbbing from where the punch landed. This was someone he had known most of his life, someone who he had once called a friend. The pain felt like a betrayal, the worst kind. This was a kid Dean had grown up with, a kid who had once told him that they would always be friends, and the asshole had the audacity to attack Sammy? 

Watched as Sam just lost it on the kid, his friends taking off in a sprint as Sam just laid into him. He tried getting Sam's attention, again and again, to stop, it was enough, the asshole had learned his lesson, but Sam just kept throwing punched and kicks. 

When he finally got through to Sam, the other boy was a mess, his face more black and blue than normal skin tone. Dean was terrified, not of Sam, never of Sam, but of his own reactions to the fight, and for Sammy. He was worried what the authorities would do to him, when they were brought in. There was no question of if, the cops would be called.

Sam reached out a hand to him and Dean found himself flinching away from it, not due to being scared of his beloved Sam... but terrified if he took the boys hand he would end up shoving him to the ground and having his way with him, right then and there.

"Sammy," he said in a moan, his voice rough from screaming and with lust, "come on, we need to get away from him."

He looked into Sam's eyes, and could see the panic and fear there, as if he was afraid that he had done something to offend, to scare Dean away from him. "I can't touch you right now, Baby. If I do... if I do we'll both end up getting arrested for public indecency. God... Sammy... what you did, not to defend yourself, but for me..."

Sam stared at Dean, stunned. Even though he knew that Dean's reaction was seriously fucked up, it made him feel better. His body felt a little stiff and shocked--his muscles finally giving in to the crash of the adrenaline rush. Dean practically pulled him back to the car. 

They took off driving, but Dean didn't turn on the radio like he always did. Instead, it was just silence. Sam could still feel his heart thumping in his chest, and the pain in his hands was finally starting to really sink it. His right hand had swelled up, knuckles bloody with more than his own blood. Sam could see Dean glance over at him out of the corner of his eyes, he knew that Dean was concerned--probably because Sam had a fairly decent amount of blood on him and some of it wasn't even his. Sam frowned because they passed Sam's house...and Dean's house. He wasn't sure where they were going. Then his heart started racing, because surely Dean wasn't going to turn him in or anything...right?

"Dean, where are we going?" Sam spoke, his jaw aching a little from where the kid had gotten in that first hit.

Dean drove in silence heading towards Bobby's house. He knew the man wouldn't be there, but he knew it was a safe place they could go. When Sam asked him where they were going, he simply answered, "Bobby's," knowing that Sam would understand. 

The rest of the ride was in silence, both of them in pain, but needing each other. When they pulled in, Dean ushered them inside, pausing briefly to call his father and explain the situation, before heading up the stairs to the guest room. They were barely in the room when he spun around, dropping to his knees in front of Sam, yanking the younger boy's jeans down, and swallowing him whole. 

Dean knew the fight shouldn't have turned him on like it did, that wasn't normal. But Dean had given up on normal a very long time ago. He pulled off of Sam's cock, leaving a kiss on the head, ignoring the whine of frustration that left Sam's mouth. He quickly stripped, moving to kneel on the bed, looking over his shoulder with a grin that was an open invitation. "Mmm, come on, Sammy, fuck me... need you so bad."

Sam was all of two seconds behind Dean. He places kisses up and down Dean's back, running his hands over Dean's skin. "One second," he stepped away briefly to rummage through Dean's duffel bag that had been flung onto the floor. He knew that it was in there, Dean always had some--it was a little bit ridiculous, but Sam supposed it did come in handy. He finally got his hands on the half-empty tube of lubricant. Sam crawled back onto the bed and kissed every part of exposed skin that he could reach before slathering his fingers in the gel and teasing at Dean's entrance. He had to use his left hand--given that his right was currently a little terrible feeling--so his fingers were a little more clumsy.

"Dean, I'm so sorry," he kissed his tailbone, "Never want to see you hurt," he slid on finger in, curling it up causing Dean to arch into his touch.

Sam worked slowly. Partly because his hand wasn't as coordinated and partly because he wanted to go gently. He felt like he needed to show Dean that he wasn't just violent and soulless like he had demonstrated earlier at school. One finger went to two and two went to three, all sliding and curling slowly. He knew every time that he brushed against Dean's prostate because of the way Dean would let out a soft moan. Sam thought that he could just do this all night, just little teasing touches until Dean came just from this. Sam knew that he couldn't personally wait that long--no matter how hot that would be.

He rolled Dean over, "Wanna see you," he kissed him softly, "Need to see you."

He squeezed out more lube, spreading it over both of their cocks. He panted at the feel of them rubbing together, so slick and warm. Sam was so in love with Dean, more than he had ever felt about anybody else. This closeness was what he lived for. It wasn't the sex--though that was great--it was the intimacy. Seeing that scared look on Dean's face earlier had made him feel like he maybe never get to feel that close to Dean every again. However, right now he was drowning in the pleasure of knowing that he hadn't frightened his fiance away.

"Dean, I love you," Sam panted out, still stroking both of them torturously slow, "Look at me," and Dean did, his bright green eyes nearly black with need staring directly into Sam's soul, "I really love you."

Dean reached up, his fingers tangling into Sam's hair as he dragged the other boy's lips down to kiss him. "Please, Sammy, need you," he whispered against Sam's lips, the words holding a begging tone to them. He could feel tears running down his cheeks. "Need to know I still have you, I can't... I can't lose you. Gonna protect you, make sure no one takes you away from me. I was so scared, scared that you were gonna be taken from me, never scared of you, never... you're perfect."

He let out at groan as Sam slid in, eyes rolling back in pleasure, "Oh, oh, oh, fuck, Sammy... right there, oh god, harder." His words were slurred with lust. He moved one hand to clasp at Sam's shoulder, moaning as every stroke of Sam's cock hit his prostate. "Oh, fuck, Sammy. Love you, love you so damn much... and it's not just the mind numbing pleasure speaking. Mmm, does it make me wrong that watching you... watching that turned me on. God, Baby, wanted to fuck you right there, wanted you to own me, to throw some of that aggression into it, wanted you to make me not be able to walk. Oh fuck, Sammmmmy," the word was let out in a long moan as Dean came, hard, his cock not even touched, he held on for dear life, letting Sam pound into him again and again and again, "Never... never gonna let you go... never met anyone like you before. Keeping you forever, you're mine."

Sam's head was spinning because of everything that Dean was saying. He didn't know what he was even supposed to think about it all. His brain stopped trying to think when Dean came completely untouched, it made Sam's cock twitch and throb. All of it becoming too much. He was trying to come up with words to say, but all he managed to get out what a constant slur of 'dean' and 'love you'. His brain was simply not available for coherent thoughts at the moment. His orgasm hit him harder than it possibly ever had. Sam was pretty sure that his moans were turning to borderline shouts. After a few more thrusts, Sam stilled before pulling out and collapsing beside Dean.

"Dean, I really am sorry," Sam leaned up on his elbow, "I should've never let him close enough to touch you," Sam's fingers ran lightly over the bruise that was forming on Dean's face. "Maybe we shouldn't have told everyone, I just, I don't want to see you get hurt again. I can't..." Sam was scared to finish the sentence because he was pretty sure that the second half of it was something along the lines of: 'let someone hurt you because I might literally kill them'. Seeing Dean with a black eye made him think about when Dean had been doing things for drugs. He wondered about how Dean had ended up beaten and bruised and left dying on the floor of a motel room. He wondered how anyone could do something like that to Dean. To his Dean. 

\---

Mary paced the living room, John had told her what had happened with the boys over the phone. Castiel was sitting on the couch, watching her walk back and forth. She was stressed and nervous and scared, Castiel could practically smell it on her.

"Cas, what if something happens to Sammy?" She sighed, "I can't. He's been through this before. We've had to move because of this." Mary was on the verge of tears.

The boys drove back home, Sam snuggled against Dean's side the entire ride. They walked out of the car, making their way slowly towards the house, only to have Mary rush out and gather them in her arms for a hug before she checked them over for injuries. There was a subdued feeling about her, how she was watching them closely. She ushered them inside, moving to get the first aid kit from the bathroom before coming and addressing to their wounds. 

"Mary... mom, it's okay, we're fine, if anything... that bastard got what he deserved," Dean said, his jaw clenched in anger. "The guy... he was a big guy, taller than Sam, big Sam that is, and outweighing him by quite a bit. He and his two buddies came after Sam, and when I stepped in on Sam's defense... they turned on me... these were guys I had thought were my friends, guys who turned on me as soon as they had something against... Don't be mad at Sammy, he was just... he was defending both of us."

Mary nodded, tears streaming down her face... "The school called, wanting to talk to the two of you... you need... you need to go back. They need to know what happened from your perspective. They have some of the fight on camera, but the only thing they could make out was Sam being ambushed, and you coming in to try and stop it... for some reason the recording fuzzed out half way through the fight only to come back into focus as you two are running away. The kid in question is being held on weapons charges, he had... he had pulled a knife and was starting to head after you when he was stopped."

Dean swallowed, grasping Sam's good hand in his, leaning his forehead against Sam's. "Can you... can you drive us? I'm not in any shape..."

'A knife? That bastard drew a knife? God it wasn't just us being together was it? He had to have planned... had to have planned some reason to come after Sammy... Not happening... not on my watch... have to get stronger... for Sammy, to protect him, protect us.'

They walked into the office, the principal wincing as he saw the two of their faces. "This won't take long, we just need to ask you a few questions before you can go."

Dean nodded, watching as Sam nodded out of the corner of his eye. 

"The school has been getting complaints about Aaron lately. About how he's been skipping classes and football practice, and there are rumors about certain behavior concerning some of the freshmen that we are looking into," the principal started, talking about the boy in question. "Now Dean, I'd like to hear what happened from your prospective."

Dean cleared his throat, "I was standing by the car, waiting for Sam to meet me so we could head home."

"Are the rumors true that the two of you came out this morning?"

Dean nodded, reaching over to grasp Sam's hand, "Yes, Sir, though... I'm not sure what that has anything to do with what's going on."

"If he used certain words, certain phrases this could be listed and considered a hate crime. We just needed to know. You have my assurance that your orientation doesn't effect how the faculty will treat you, we have a zero tolerance on that sort of behavior."

"But calling someone a freak and a loser for no reason is acceptable?" Dean knew he shouldn't have used the tone he did, but it angered him.

"Has this been happening? If so we'd like the names of the offenders and they will be dealt with accordingly, like I said Mister Winchester, we have a zero tolerance on bullying."

Dean nodded, swallowing hard, "So anyway... I was waiting at the car and I heard Aaron yelling 'Hey Faggot' at him, I looked over and saw him, Stevens and Pierce heading towards Sam. I started heading over, wanting to break things up when Aaron swung at Sam. He punched me in the face, and when I landed I hit my head on the pavement, I was out of it for a minute or two. But when I came to, his buddies were gone and Sam was fighting for his life. I mean, Aaron's a big dude, a grown man." He looked over at Sam briefly, "Dude's 19, he got held back a year. And Sam... no offense Sammy, but you're kinda small right now... Aaron is like over a foot taller than you and probably weighs like two of you."

He swallowed hard, "We're just lucky that Sam is a black belt... I mean what would have happened...?" Dean trailed off shuddering. "We heard... we heard he pulled a knife. I know I shouldn't have ran... but I was terrified that his buddies were gonna come back and finish what they started."

The principal nodded, turning to face Sam, "So tell me what happened for your perspective." He had a kind smile on his face, his golden eyes shining with kindness.

Sam licked his lips, "Well, I guess I had been cleaning out my locker and stuff, because it was getting kinda trashed-up. But Dean was at the car waiting for me, so I thought that I better hurry up. I was walking about to the car when Aaron called me a..well...you know. I promise that I was just going to let it go. He hit me, but I was just going to, you know, take the beating so I could go home or whatever. Then Dean came up and Aaron started mouthing him too and he shoved him...and then he hit him. I don't know, I just kinda lost it or something, because I didn't want Dean to get hurt."

Sam's heart was still racing, he was nervous about what they were going to decide to do to him. The principal just say and thought for a moment, swiveling in his chair a bit. "Mary, you can come inside now," he spoke loud enough for Sam's mom to hear him from outside the door. When she walked in, she sat down by Sam and took his hand--it had been a while since she had done that and it almost made Sam smile.

"Okay," the man sighed, "While Aaron will obviously be getting disciplined for his actions, I have a feeling the board wouldn't be too happy with me if I let you two off the hook completely. I want all three of you to know that we will definitely be paying closer to attention to the words and actions of our students towards you two boys and the other students."

"So what's their punishment going to be? Detention or ISS?" Mary asked.

"For our school policy, anybody who gets in a physical fight must be suspended for at least 3 days. Since I believe you two weren't trying to start a fight and were obviously defending yourselves, I'm going to give you both the minimum suspension of three days. Now, I'm going to have your homework collected and, Mary, you can come pick it up tomorrow morning if you would like."

"Of course, that'd be fine," Mary gave a smile and a nod.

When they got back to the car, Sam felt himself rejoicing that they didn't expel him from school--that was what he had been expecting. He could tell that his mom was upset at him for getting into a fight and getting in trouble, but she was just as happy that they didn't have a relocate again.


	8. Marking

The ride back from the school was made in silence, Dean holding a half asleep Sam against his chest. When they got back to Mary's house, the boys went inside, heading for Sam's room. Mary went to check on them less than five minutes later, finding them both fast asleep still fully dressed on top of the covers. Smiling sadly she shook her head, knowing she was going to feel guilty when she had to wake them, but also knowing they would both be miserable if they didn't eat supper.

There was a knock on the door, and Mary went to answer it.

\---

Sam had spent most of the day locked in the motel room with his brother, the two men getting reacquainted with each other's bodies in every way possible. They had only left briefly to go across the street to the diner to get some lunch before returning to their room and making love again. Sam hadn't had this much sex since he was a teenager, not that he was complaining, because it was Dean. Dean was his everything, always had been and always would be, it just had taken Sam a while to realize just how much he missed this part of their relationship.

That evening they headed over to Mary's to check on the boys, wanting to know how their day had went. Sam knew he shouldn't feel like he did for the boys, his feelings for them almost reaching the same obsessive levels as his feelings for his brother, but he couldn't help himself. There was something about the two of them that drew him and Sam knew that Dean felt the same way. It was bad enough that he was head over heels in love with his older brother, but Sam was starting to fall for the younger versions of himself and Dean.

They stopped to pick up some pizzas and went to Mary's, knocking on the door. Part of Sam was hoping that either Sam or Dean would be the one to answer, as he needed to see them. His body was aching to touch and take them again, his mind showing him images of the boys spread naked under him. It was Mary who answered the door, and Sam stopped himself from frowning when he saw her.

Sam was concerned when he saw the look on her face, a look that screamed sadness and pain, "What happened?"

Mary sighed, letting them inside, noticing that they had brought food, "There was a fight after school. The boys were jumped by three seniors. They are suspended for the next three days."

Sam nodded, swallowing hard, "Are they okay?" He was worried, there was obviously something the woman wasn't telling them.

"Why'd they get in a fight?" Dean said with tension in his voice.

"They're okay and it was just the same old bullying nonsense," Mary shook her head, but it hurt her to see people saying things like that about her son. She had never once seen anything wrong with him because he happened to like other boys. 

"Where are they?" Dean quirked his eyebrow.

"Upstairs napping," she gestured towards the stairs.

"We'll take some dinner up to them," Sam took one of the pizza boxes and handed the other one to Mary.

Dean followed Sam up the stairs, his stomach rumbling despite the fact that the was worried about his boys. Knuckles tapping the wood, Dean knocked on the door. No one answered. He knocked again. Once again no answer. When they opened the door, the boys were still tangled up in a cuddling position on top of the covers--completely out. He heard Sam chuckle at the sight. Dean remembered how he and Sam used to pass out like that, wrapped up in each other, exhausted from the day or night's hunt. 

Not that he would say it even held at gunpoint, but Dean had to admit that he was falling in love with the two boys. It was more than the should-be-wrong sex. Dean felt connected to them. There was this part of him that wanted to fix things for them, wanted to save them from things. 

"Hungry?" Dean opened the pizza box and waved it around close to them. He chuckled when they began to wake up, eyes veiled in sleep.

Dean woke up to the smell of pizza. He cracked an eye open, looking at the older Sam and Dean standing next to the bed, holding out the food.

"Mmm, hey, you brought food," he said, still half out of it, but knowing that the observation was unnecessary. "Sorry, kinda still outta it." He sat up against the headboard, pulling Sammy up with him, the younger teen yawning and nuzzling his head into Dean's neck briefly.

Dean motioned to the bed, "Why don't you sit down. It will be easier to eat if you sit."

\---

Sam nodded, sitting down, his eyes locked on the bruise on the teen's face. He bit back a hiss of anger when he noticed how Sammy's hands were wrapped up, wanting to kill whoever had caused his boys to get injured. If it was up to Sam, neither boy would get hurt again as long as he lived. "I wanna kill the bastards who did this to you," he said softly. barely registering the words coming out of his mouth.

His hand reached forward, brushing against Sammy's bruised hand, "I don't like seeing you hurt," Sam leaned across the bed, placing a chaste kiss on Dean's lips, "either of you."

Dean watched Sam place a quick kiss on the younger Dean's lips. Something about the action surprised him. It was simple and loving and protective, not unlike the things that Dean had always done for Sam. He wondered if Sam had picked up things like that from him or if it was just in Sam's nature to be like that.

The boys ate their pizza and Dean noticed how the younger Dean would occasionally feed Sammy a bite--the poor kid's hand was all banged up. Part of Dean felt proud because little Sammy really knew how to throw a punch if he had managed to get in that many hits and only have his hand messed up that much. It made him feel weird knowing that Mary had probably taught him out to fight. Dean had been the one to teach Sam how to fight. It was confusing to know that this Dean hadn't shown Sammy how to fight. This Dean had grown up in a completely different world than him, Sam, and Sammy. He would be lying if he said that he wasn't a little jealous of parts of the other Dean's life. But obviously, this Dean didn't get it easy either.

Dean jumped a little when he felt a hand over his and turned to see Sam giving him a little smile. Something about the moment felt so disgustingly domestic, but Dean sort of...liked it.

\---

"You are stressed," Castiel sat across the table watching Mary eat a slice of pizza.

"Wonder why that could be," Mary's voice seemed harsher than normal, but then her expression softened, "I'm sorry...I just really am stressed. Everything with the boys. I thought we were going to have to move and I had promised Sam that we would try and stay in one place for a while. Now they're both kicked out of school for a few days and..." she sighed.

Castiel looked at her intently waiting for the rest of the sentence. He didn't like the thought of her moving. After all, it had been a hassle to constantly be tracking her and Sam everywhere they went. Mostly, he didn't like seeing her upset. Her face seemed darker and older when she was sad. Normally, a bright smile made her seem ageless and beautiful or a fierce look made her seem brave and intense. Sadness didn't fit her. It didn't look right on Mary.

"And sometimes I wonder where I went wrong." she ran her hand through her hair.

\---

Dean was watching the room with an appraising gaze, something was going on here, he just wasn't quite sure what exactly. Sammy cuddled up against him was normal, hell Dean could actually do with more cuddling, but cuddling generally led to them messing around, and now since they actually had finally had sex well, Dean could only see this leading that way. He was confused by the whole situation with the older Sam and Dean, part of him was screaming at him that it was wrong, that he should be jealous every single time he saw either of the men doing anything with Sammy, and yet... and yet it didn't. 

If anyone else touched Sammy, in even a fraction of the way either of the two men did, he'd be so angry that he'd be tempted to hurt them. But Sam and Dean... not only didn't it bother him, it turned him on more than he was willing to admit. His feelings were also troubling him. He was in love with Sammy, had been since they met, and was planning on spending forever with him, and yet he knew he was starting to fall for the other two men. He couldn't explain it, and didn't want to bring it up to Sammy, in fear of breaking his beloved's heart.

Dean wanted to snake his fingers into Sam's hair when the man kissed him and intensify the kiss, wanted to learn every inch of the man's body, map his scars like he had mapped Sammy's. But he behaved himself. When Sam pulled away Dean watched how the older Dean was watching them, how Sammy was watching them. He could tell that Sammy had enjoyed the view, as the younger boy's jeans were displaying a prominent bulge in the front.

Dean leaned over, whispering into Sammy's ear, "You liked that, didn't you, Baby. Liked watching him kiss me."

Sam knew he had to pull away before he did anything stupid, but had a very hard (no pun intended) time dragging himself away from the younger Dean's lips. He wanted more than anything to get the boy naked and take him, feel him tremble with want and need as Sam pounded into that beautiful young body. 

He looked over and saw both Dean and Sammy watching the situation with thinly veiled desire. "So what's going to happen because of the fight?" he asked, trying to change the subject to one that wouldn't lead to sex, not with the boys mother down in the living room.

When Sammy responded that they had a three day out of school suspension, Sam let out a curse, biting his lips. "Maybe... maybe you could come with us this evening, you know since you don't have to be anywhere in the morning. That is if you wanted to, I'm not saying that you have to." 'but I really want you to come with us,' was unspoken, but Sam was sure that the others all heard it anyway.

Sammy had goosebumps spreading over his skin, because Dean was currently being a tease by tracing little designs on Sammy's arm. When they had done this all together before, it had been a little less bad. After all, they were having sex...with themselves. But Sammy found himself wanting more. He wanted the other Dean in addition. The quick kiss between Sam and Sammy's Dean had gotten a coil of heat spinning in Sammy's stomach. While he had to admit to being slightly jealous--it was his Dean after all--the arousal it inflicted on him far surpassed any envious feelings. 

"If Mom's okay with it," Sammy looked over at Dean--who had that almost constant hungry glimmer in his eyes, "we'd love to come hang out." Hang out. As if that pertained to what they would most likely end up doing. Sammy couldn't even say that Dean and him hung out much. They fooled around a lot. Recently, they had sex a lot. Now they apparently participated with foursomes. What could he say? Hormones had a way of taking over any reasonable thoughts a boy could have.

Dean saw how his younger self had a protective arm slung around Sammy--it made him proud. At least he still had that same internal need to protect Sam, no matter what universe they were in. Then, of course, he noticed the little tracings that Dean's fingers were doing and how Sammy's skin pebbled out beneath it. Dean wondered what they felt like. He was dying to get his hands on Sammy, get a chance to relive what it had been like between him and Sam so long ago, but he also wanted to because it was this Sammy. This Sammy, the one who grew up a hunter, the one who beat the shit out of some kid earlier, the one who was so different and yet so similar to his own Sam. It confused Dean a little.

Sam went downstairs, biting his lips before clearing the look from his face. He approached Mary, who was sitting on the couch drinking a cup of coffee, and cleared his throat. When she looked up at him, he smiled kindly, asking, "The boys told us they don't have school, what with the suspension... and we, Dean and I that is, we were wondering if they could come hang out with us, well Sammy needs your permission, 'cause Dean's 18 and all, but you know we thought they could spend some time with us."

Mary looked up at Sam, noticing the hopeful look on his face. She was tired, the fear of having to break her word to Sammy, having to move again, had taken it's toll on her. She nodded at him, standing to walk over to her purse. She reached inside, grabbing some money out before turning to face the man, "Here, he eats a lot. They both do, take this to help with food."

Sam nodded graciously, heading back up the stairs, stopping himself from taking them two at a time in his haste to get back to them.

Dean gave his brother a look, because the giant came into the room a little too eagerly and a little too breathless. Did he just run up the stairs? 

"We're good to go," he smiled--and dammit Dean did too...because it was contagious when Sam smiled.

They watched the boys stuff some clothes into a bag and headed out to the car. Sammy stopped and hugged Mary before running after them and sliding into the backseat beside his own Dean. Dean cranked up the music, Sam turned it down a bit, and revved Baby up. He thought he heard Sammy giggling at the car speeding off. Not that he was surprised, he'd used Baby more than once to impress. Lord knows, Sam used to always enjoy going for a drive whenever their dad would let them. 

Sammy was giggling before all of his breath of taken away. Dean yanked him in for a bruising, unexpected kiss. He still felt a little awkward doing this in front of the other Dean, but there wasn't much resistance. He could hardly ever resist Dean--no matter what version he was. Sammy groaned when Dean snaked a hand up his shirt and he caught the other Dean's eyes in the rearview mirror. Suddenly, he felt so turned on that it almost hurt. One Dean groping and kissing and sucking on his skin. The other flicking up glances with bright green eyes every few seconds. Sammy looked over at Sam and noticed how the man was rubbing his hands over his thighs, which of course made him look a little higher and noticed the very evident stretch of denim.  
Dean saw the boys in the back and what they were doing. It was driving him insane. He almost pulled the car over, climbed in the backseat, and joined in. But he refrained. He glanced over at Sam, who was about to have an aneurism by the looks of it. Dean could practically feel all the arousal in his car vibrating around him. 

They were barely inside the motel when Dean found himself pinned against the wall by Sam, the older man practically picking him up off the floor holding him by his hips. Dean found himself wrapping his legs around the taller man's waist, grinding into him. "Oh, fuck," he whimpered. 

Sam pulled away from his lips, moving to lick and suck at his neck, and the change of angle allowed Dean to watch as the older Dean lowered Sammy onto the bed, kissing the boy gently. He watched as Dean pulled Sammy's t-shirt over his head and began to kiss along Sammy's chest.

Dean's attention was brought back to the man attacking his neck when Sam placed one large hand on his ass, whispering in his ear to wrap his arms around his neck. Dean did as he was told, and moaned against Sam's lips when the man kissed him once more, carrying Dean over to the other bed. Dean landed on the bed with a bounce, biting his lips as Sam took off his shirt before leaning over Dean. 

Sam smirked down at the boy, moving to pull the boy's shirt off before laying down on top of him, their cocks rubbing against each other through layers of denim. He leaned down, whispering in Dean's ear, "Gonna fuck you so hard, Baby, you're gonna love it, aren't you?" He chuckled when Dean nodded hard, a moan escaping the teen's mouth.

Sam sucked on Dean's pulse point, adding a hickey to the ones already there, this one was his, and it sent a thrill through his body to see his mark on the boy. "Mmm, wanna get you and Sammy tattoos, letting everyone know you belong to us, to me and Dean, and that no one but us gets to touch you. That the only people who get to see you like this are in this room. You'd like that, wouldn't you, Baby Boy."

Sam heard Dean, his Dean, well his brother Dean, mutter, "Oh, fuck," after he said that. Sam looked over briefly and saw Dean and Sammy watching them with lust filled gazes, Dean winking before turning back to his young lover.

Dean shuddered with lust at the words, hearing Sam call him that... it did things to him. He clawed at Sam's back, thrusting up at him, "Sam, please." He knew the words were whined, but he didn't care, all he cared about was having Sam take him, own him, make him his.

Sam took pity on the boy, and himself if he was being honest, and pulled away long enough to yank the boy's jeans and boxers off his body. He tossed them on the floor, quickly kicking off his own boots and jeans and boxers. He grabbed the tube of lube, coming back to the bed. He crawled up the bed, licking and kissing his way up Dean's legs shoving them apart gently, his kisses trailing up to Dean's inner thighs. Blindly he popped open the tube of lube, slicking his fingers as he licked and sucked on Dean's cock, moaning as the boy arched up into his mouth.

Sammy arched into each one of the kisses that Dean was trailing all over his skin. Those hands were finally on him and and it was like they already knew him. He was surprised that Dean was going slow, he envisioned it being a lot rougher and more intense, but this felt a lot closer to being worshiped. Sammy tugged at the flannel shirt Dean had on and finally the man sat up and unbuttoned it--which was too fucking close to a striptease for Sammy's sanity to stay intact. He watched the man smirk before pulling his tank off and folding back onto the boy's body.

"Dean," Sammy whined as Dean kissed and licked along the hem of Sammy's jeans, teasing little touches. Calloused fingers came up and unbuttoned his pants, dragging the zipper down with it. Sammy sighed at the bit of relief. He thought he might actually die if he didn't get some contact soon.

Dean pulled Sammy's pants off, admiring the boy's young, lanky body. It looked astonishingly close to Sam's back in the day, even some of the scars were the same, which made Dean a little curious. Dean was taking off his own jeans when Sammy sat up and did the job for him, sitting at the edge of the bed. He thought he might collapse when Sammy started pressed hot breaths and kisses over Dean's boxers. The boy was certainly getting him back for all of his teasing. Sammy's hands ran up and down Dean's thighs before his fingers came up and gave the elastic a pull. Dean kicked his boxers to the side and let out a not-so-inside-voice moan when Sammy took him into the wet heat of his mouth.

"Fuck, Sammy," Dean bit his lip, focusing on not thrusting up into those perfect lips.

He glanced over to look at Sam and the other Dean, and that did all of nothing to help him refrain from bucking his hips. Both Sams currently had their mouths full of both Deans cocks. Dean couldn't decide if this was the weirdest thing that he'd ever experienced or the fucking hottest thing he'd ever experienced. He settled on somewhere in between.

"Oh, fuck," Dean moaned, as Sam began sucking in earnest, his fingers probing inside him, stretching him. The older man was driving him insane with lust as his fingers time and again hit Dean's prostate. He arched up into Sam's mouth, curses slipping out of his mouth as his body was overwhelmed with sensation. Dean was just about to cum when Sam pulled off, clamping his large hand hard around the base of Dean's cock, preventing him from cumming. 

"Fuck, come on, let me cum, please, Sam, I'm begging you," Dean didn't care how much of a whiny bitch he sounded like, all he wanted to do was cum.

Sam crawled up Dean's body, leaning in to whisper in his ear, "You're not cumming without my cock buried inside you, Baby Boy. Mmm, wanna feel you cum around me, gonna be so good for both of us."

Sam watched as Dean nodded, the teen repeating, "Yes, god yes, please," again and again and again. He grinned, moving Dean's willing body a bit, before teasing at his waiting entrance with the tip of his cock. 

"Gonna fuck you now, Dean. Gonna make you mine," Sam groaned as he slammed into the boy in one hard thrust, Dean's body arching up against him, the teen's hard cock trapped between their bellies. Sam grabbed onto Dean's hips, thrusting into the younger male with hard brutal strokes, he could feel Dean trembling, knowing the boy was close and wrapped his hand around his hard length once more. "Mmm, not yet, Sweetheart, wanna make this last."

Dean cursed, denied orgasm once more. He clawed at Sam's back with one hand, grabbing the man by the back of the neck. He yanked him down for a kiss, the movement causing a change in angle that had Sam's cock hitting his prostate on every thrust. "Gotta cum, please, Sam, let me cum," he cried out.

Sam decided to take pity on him, and this time when he felt Dean getting close he let the boy cum, feeling the hot jizz coat both of their stomachs. The feeling of Dean's inner muscles spasming with his orgasm had Sam on the edge himself, his thrusts becoming erratic. He bit down on Dean's shoulder, knowing it was going to leave a mark as he flooded the younger man's body with his cum. "Oh, god, Dean, Baby, Baby Boy, so good. Gonna keep you forever, me and Dean gonna keep you and Sammy forever. Never gonna leave you, never gonna let you go."

Sammy made a noise when Dean pulled him off his cock and shoved him on the bed. Dean didn't waste any time and he got Sammy completely naked--finally--and let his tongue sweep over the head of Sammy's cock.

Sammy was wondering when the hell Dean managed to get lube, he figured Sam probably had something to do with it. He was gasping when Dean pressed a finger to Sam's hole. "Oh fuck, D-Dean," Sam couldn't decide which way to arch his body. It all felt so good and his pleasure-filled mind was in no state to be making any sort of decision. Dean pulled away with an obscene pop.

"Look at me Baby Boy," Dean commanded and Sammy listened, propping himself up on his elbows. "Good boy," he smirked before sinking his mouth back on Sammy.

Sammy was writhing under Dean's touch. Dean's fingers curling and stroking over that spot that was currently making him see stars and his mouth sucking him with skill. When Sam's hands when down to thread in Dean's hair, he realized how much shorter it was than his Dean's, but he still had enough to grab.

Dean could feel Sammy's impending orgasm, and he was almost ashamed at how excited he was to taste the kid. He wanted to know how similar he tasted to Sam--so far super close. He pressed his fingers roughly against Sammy's prostate and sucked his cock wetly, and then Sammy was arching off the bed, moaning out his name. Dean swallowed him down, and fuck, he tasted just like Sam. Dean was moaning around Sammy's cock until the kid pushed him back from oversensitivity.

He was shocked to see those hungry hazel eyes staring back at him. Dean crawled onto the bed and was even more surprised by Sammy shoving him back against the mattress.

"He gives as good as he gets," he heard a voice/moan from beside him that he could only assume was the other Dean.

And damn, he was right. Sammy sank down all the way like a pro. Dean could feel his throat fluttering around the head of his cock, just trying to get used to the intrusion. Sammy was moaning and wriggling his tongue and Dean didn't remember Sam ever being able to do that little twisting thing with his tongue like Sammy seemed to have perfected. He fisted his hand into Sammy's hair, gripping tightly.

"Your mouth feels so good Sammy," Dean moaned before thrusting up into that perfect heat. He couldn't believe the boy was just taking it--and seemed to be liking it.

In the background, he vaguely heard Sam and the other Dean cumming, their moans breaking. He could feel how close he was getting. It was going too fast and he couldn't care because Sammy's fucking mouth, that's why. The boy just let him fuck his mouth, humming in response.

"Shit Sammy," Dean hissed throwing his head back, "Gotta cum, so fucking close."

At those words, Sammy took him down his throat, clenching around him. Dean came down the boy's throat with a gasp that turned into a moan. Sammy was perfect. So fucking perfect.

Dean lay panting on the bed, body still thrumming with lust even after being fucked as hard as he was. He looked over to the other bed, and noticed Sammy watching with that content little smirk of his... Dean knew that round two was coming up shortly. He grinned, watching as Sammy came over to the bed he was on, curling up against Dean's chest, leaning in for a heated kiss. 

Dean groaned as Sammy's tongue snaked into his mouth, catching the flavor of the other Dean on his tongue. There was something so intoxicating about the knowledge of just who he was tasting on his Sammy. Dean's arms wrapped around the younger boy, his hands stroking at his firm ass, fingers moving to tease at his opening. Dean was addicted to making Sammy moan and tremble with pleasure, and would feel content to please him all the rest of his days.

Dean groaned when he felt other fingers join his, looking over Sammy's shoulder into smirking hazel eyes. "Oh, fuck," he moaned, thinking that he had never seen a more erotic sight than Sam stretching Sammy's body open, that was something that Dean could watch on a daily basis if he had anything to say about it. He grinned, motioning Dean over to the bed, pulling the older man down next to him when he came over.

He stroked the older man gently a few times, enjoying the sounds coming out of his mouth. Dean chuckled when Sammy let out a frustrated moan, knowing the younger teen was getting pretty worked up. Dean was on edge himself, and was losing track of whose hands were where. After a few minutes of teasing, he whimpered, "I don't care which one one you does it, but if I don't have a cock in me soon I am gonna be pissed."

Dean smirked, biting and kissing along the back of the younger Dean's neck. His eyes locked with Sam for just a second, but somehow that got him going even more just knowing that Sam was right there on the other side. "You got it baby," Dean shoved into the boy with little resistance. Both of the boys moaned between Sam and Dean, which made Dean realize that Sam had done the same thing as him. They were doing everything at the same time, their thrusts matching in rhythm--and Dean couldn't take his eyes off of Sam and Sammy.

"Gonna make you cum so hard Baby Boy," Dean nearly growled and bit Dean's neck, making sure to leave a mark. He couldn't believe that he had essentially called himself 'Baby Boy' but this Dean was becoming his baby boy. He snapped his hips up roughly, relishing in the loud moans that were spilling from Dean's lips.

Sammy was groaning at the feel of Sam inside him and the sight in front of him. He was clutching onto Dean, who was lying beside him. Sammy let his hands run over Dean's chest, shoulders, and stomach just loving the way he felt to the touch. Whatever they had with the other Dean and Sam was great, but it would never be like what was between them. 

"Mmm Dean," Sammy tipped his head back, resting it on Sam's shoulder. Dean was stroking him and the combined feeling was amazing. He fumbled his hands downwards until he could grasp onto Dean's cock enjoying the expletives that he seemed unable to control at this point. Sammy moaned when Dean yanked him close for a kiss, both of them making little noises in each other mouths and still stroking the other one. Sam's grip onto Sammy's hips was getting tighter and he knew that the older man was getting close. He started moving his hand quicker on Dean, twisting his wrists and thumbing over the slick head. Sammy knew Dean's body almost better than his own.

He watched Dean gasp and bite his lip when Dean came on his stomach and his hand. "Fuck Dean," Sammy's eyes could barely stay open because of how good everything felt, "you're so beautiful, love you so much." 

\---

John and Bobby walked up the steps onto Mary's porch, holding a few pizzas, a case of beer, some wine coolers, and two cases of soda for the boys. John nudged to doorbell with his elbow, and was greeted by a smiling Mary.

Mary let them inside, shaking her head at the men's armfuls. "The boys aren't here, any of them. The older two came over with pizza about an hour ago and after they ate they asked if Sammy and Dean could hang out with them tonight."

John nodded, even though there was something off about the whole situation he could just feel it. "So where's the angel?" he asked looking around for Castiel.

"He... he said he had some demons to deal with and that he's be back."

The three of them sat chatting quietly and eating their pizza for a while before they heard the front door open and close. Two sets of footsteps could be heard, so Mary assumed it was Dean and Sammy. She turned to see Castiel and the boys high school principal standing just inside the doorway, Castiel smiling at something the other man had said.

"My brother told me that the boys who attacked your sons were demons, Mary. We dealt with them... the boys they were inhabiting are fine, so don't worry about them," Castiel had crossed the room, speaking softly and directly to Mary, as if he didn't notice John or Bobby sitting by her. "I made sure that they are in good health, so that no trouble will come to your boys."

The principal, Gabriel, walked over and sat down in one of the chairs, a smirk on his face, "Aww, Baby Brother has a girlfriend?" He looked over at John and Bobby with a grin, grabbing one of the wine coolers. He knew John recognized him, he had been the principal the whole time Dean had been in high school, and due to Dean interfering and breaking up fights left and right throughout his high school career, John and he had met quite a few times.

"You're an angel?" John asked staring at the man.

Gabriel smirked, "Archangel actually. But who cares about things like that. Your boys though... those two are something else. I've been keeping an eye on them, well Dean the longest, but still."

Bobby looked over at him, "Why've you been lookin' over those idjits?"

Gabriel threw a look to Castiel, and waited to respond until the other angel nodded at him, "Castiel asked me to. He said if I didn't protect them I would end up dead. He won't tell me how I supposedly die though."

Castiel felt guilt over his brother's death from the other life. He always wondered why he couldn't save him, why he had made poor choices. In a way, Castiel felt at fault for his brother's death. He had missed Gabriel more than he cared to mention. However, he hadn't exactly missed the angel's comments and jokes. Mary blushed at his comment over her being Castiel's "girlfriend", which made Cas' face feel too warm for his liking. He was hoping that Gabriel hadn't embarrassed her too much. 

"I was busy having to watch over Sam and Mary," Castiel chimed in before Gabriel could say too much, "so it was just easier to have somebody keep an eye on you and Dean."

He felt like he was waiting for Gabriel to do something, some big opener for himself. After all, the idiot was known for his boldness. That was what got him killed in the other reality.

But he was surprised. Gabriel didn't do anything bold. Instead, the angel sat down--beside Mary, which shouldn't have irritated Cas as much as it did--and started eating pizza. Castiel smiled a little when Mary gave Gabriel a look for eating. She had never seen Castiel eat, so he was sure Gabriel eating ravenously was a little odd. "You're eating," she said, still watching him chow down.

"You betcha Sweetheart," Gabriel swallowed down his bite.

"Gabriel participates in many self-indulgent activities that are unnecessary for angels," Castiel took a seat across from the couch, feeling a little singled out.

"Castiel is just unable to actually enjoy anything," Gabriel shrugged, already started on his second slice.

Mary chuckled at Castiel's brother, so Cas couldn't be too upset with Gabe's comment. He always enjoyed getting to see Mary smile.

\---

Dean sighed contently, his hands running lightly along Sammy's body as they kissed. It wasn't a hungry kiss, but one that spoke of love and devotion. The older Sam and Dean had left for a little while to go get something, what Dean didn't know, leaving Dean and Sammy alone in the motel room. They lay with their limbs intertwined, hands and lips caressing each other, mapping each other's body once more. 

"Mmm, Sammy, love you so much," Dean whispered, resting his forehead against Sammy's. "Don't know... don't know what I'd do without you. Glad that you love me as much as I love you." He sighed, kissing Sammy's lips, holding onto the younger teen tightly, "I love you, you know that, right? I'd give anything for you. You're... you and me are forever. I'm just... I'm just scared. I think... I think I'm falling for the other you too, him and the other me. It terrifies me, I shouldn't love them, not like I love you, but I do. God, I want to mark them as mine just as much as I want to mark you. Tell me I'm not wrong... and if I am... it'll hurt, but you are my priority. If you tell me to give them up I will, I'll do anything for you, to make you smile."

Sammy considered Dean's words, mulling them over in his mind. He was falling for the two older men too. There was something about them that he felt naturally drawn to. He liked the way they made him feel and he liked the way he could make them feel. But Dean--Dean was his everything. He'd give up anything in a heartbeat if that's what Dean asked of him. The whole thing confused him. It wasn't as simple with four people as it was with two--not that it was ever really simple.

"Dean, I...I think that I'm falling for them too," Sam kissed Dean chastely, "It's just...What if," Sam bit his lip, struggling to find the right words, "What if you end up loving them more than me?" Sammy cleared his throat, trying to get the tightness out of it, "I just, you know that I'd do anything for you, but I can't," Sam ducked his head into Dean's shoulder, "I need to know that you love me most," he scoffed at himself, "Fuck," he looked into Dean's eyes, "I sound so childish and whiney and conceited, but Dean...no matter how much I love them, it won't be like how much I love you. I just need to know that we're on the same page or whatever."

He felt ashamed that he couldn't just be okay with whatever it was between them and the other Sam and Dean. He wanted to just give Dean whatever the boy asked for, and probably would if he had to choose between Dean only loving him a little or Dean not loving him at all. But he was greedy, Sam wanted Dean to need him more than anyone else. It was pure selfishness, he knew it, but it was the truth.

Dean kissed Sammy gently, "You and me, My Love, my WORLD, if it gets too much for either of us, we walk away from them. I love you, Sam, my Sammy, my sexy beautiful fiance. I can't go on without you. I mean yeah, it would suck if they left, but I know it wouldn't kill me, not like if I lost you. You are my everything, my love, my soul, my BLOOD, you and me, Baby. Tell me what to do, tell me what you need, and I'll make it happen. If you tell me that we end this with them tonight, we do as soon as they get back, and you and I get dressed and call Mar... Mom, or Dad and get a ride, and we go home." 

He leaned his head against Sammy's neck, breathing in his scent, "This, you and me, this is what matters, we saved each other in ways they don't know, ways they weren't part of. I love them, just not as all consuming as I love you. If they died, I'd be sad, heartbroken, yes. But if you died, I'd be finishing myself off before you were cool and joining you."

Sam kissed him roughly, gripped his face in his hands. Dean was so perfect and Sam couldn't help but wonder how he managed to get so lucky. "I don't want to end it with them," he smiled against Dean's lips, "I love what we've got with them," Sam kissed him again. "You're just never allowed to leave me okay?" Sammy realized that he didn't really need Dean to answer that, he already knew the answer--and that was the best part of it all. "Although, we've got three days away from school and I want to spend at least one of them just with you." He kissed him again.

Like always, their kissing never stayed innocent for very long. Sammy grinding upwards when Dean straddled him--pinning his arms above his head. It wasn't that Sam couldn't overpower him. Even though he was younger, he was pretty strong. However, he liked this feeling. He liked being covered by Dean, surrounded by Dean. "Never gonna need anybody but you Dean," Sam breathed out before seizing Dean's lips again with his own.

"We interrupting something?" he heard the other Dean's voice. Sammy hadn't even heard them come in and his face flushed red--which was just stupid because both of the men had seen him spread out and naked below them, kissing wasn't exactly a shocking thing. 

Dean looked up at the the older men, watching them grin. "No... we were just... discussing some things." He noticed the way they were eyeing them, under the hunger and possessive protectiveness there was a slight look of sadness on their faces.

\---

When Sam returned to the room with Dean he heard the teens talking, he wasn't sure what the conversation was all about, but he had to walk from the doorway when he heard Dean basically telling Sammy that if anything happened to him he was going to kill himself. Sam pushed his brother against the wall, knowing he had heard those words as well, snaking his fingers into the older man's hair and kissing him hard. "Can't lose you, not again. What he said, about if Sammy dies... Dean, you die on me and I am not going to go on, I will follow you. I can't go through that, not again. I love you, so damn much it terrifies me sometimes."

"If we had been together like this when you went to hell... I would have followed you there, no second thoughts. I almost did, I am nothing without you. As much... as much as I love those two boys in there... and god knows I love them and would do almost anything for them, it's you I can't live without, you, Dean, my Dean, my big brother, never gonna leave you again."

Sam let out a moan as Dean shoved him towards the Impala, opening the back door and laying Sam down on the seat. Sam reached up, pulling Dean's lips back down to his, clinging to the man for dear life. Sam arched up into Dean as his brother undid his belt and jeans, shoving them and Sam's boxers down Sam's hips. He reached down, opening Dean's pants, forcing them down the older man's legs before Dean settled against him, their cocks lining up against each other. "Oh, god, Dean," he moaned as Dean began rocking against him, their cocks rubbing frantically against each other.

Sam clung to his brother, their lips meeting again and again in desperate kisses. Dean kept telling him how much he loved him, that nothing was as important as the two of them together. They rutted against each other hard, their frantic movements causing them both to moan and pant with lust. Tears were in each mans eyes, and yet it was perfect. "Oh, fuck," Sam groaned, his body trembling as his orgasm hit him hard and fast, his hands holding on to Dean for dear life. Dean followed shortly after, resting his head against Sam's shoulder.

They lay there for a few moments, before pulling their pants back up and getting out of the car. Sam grabbed the bag they had gotten and they walked back into the room, were they found Dean and Sammy intertwined making out on the bed. He laughed at the embarrassed look that covered Sammy's face when Dean asked if they were interrupting anything.

\--- 

Dean could tell something was off, and watched as the men made their way into the room on shaky legs. He could tell they had been crying, and hoped that nothing was wrong. He stood up, pulling Sammy with him and crossed over to them, wrapping an arm around each of them, Sammy copying the movement, "You two okay?"

"You need to stop worrying Baby Boy," Dean shoved his younger self teasingly, "We're fine."

And Dean was telling the truth. Sam and him were fine for the first time in way too long. It felt too good to be where they were, felt like the other shoe was going to drop at any time. Things weren't this good for him and Sam (and even Cas) ever. Normally, there was a monster or angel or demon coming in to destroy any goodness that they had. However, this time they hadn't had many interruptions. Dean was sort of happy, or at least as close as he'd ever really been. He had his Sam back, the one who loved and worshiped him despite all the reasons why he shouldn't. On top of that, he had these two boys who were pretty amazing too--and who he couldn't quite get enough of. Yeah, he was fine.

Sammy ducked his head with a grin when Dean called his Dean 'Baby Boy'. He didn't know why it always made him smile, but it did. He thought maybe because it was such a Dean thing to say, even when they were talking to each other. 

"So we were thinking," the older Dean glanced over at Sam, "Well, we were thinking about giving something to you two. I'm sure that you've seen the anti-possession tats on our chests."

"Would've been kind of hard to miss," Sammy let his eyes drop to the spot on Dean where he knew the tattoo was hiding under a couple layers of clothing.

"Yeah, yeah," Dean rolled his eyes, "Anyways, we thought it might be a good idea if you two had them. I was actually surprised that you didn't have one yet Sammy."

"I'm just a freshman in high school," Sammy defended himself, "You can't possibly tell me that you had those by my age."

"Oh whatever," Dean waved him off. 

Sometimes Sammy was surprised by how much his Dean and Sam's Dean had in common. It was just the little gestures and things that made Sammy realize that they were--almost--the same person.

Dean moaned as he was pushed back against the bed, Sam straddling his hips, the man's jeans rubbing against his flesh, causing him to moan in ecstasy. Sam's hands snaked into his hair, pulling Dean's head up to meet him for a kiss. Dean could hear the tattoo gun working, and looked over to see Dean bent over Sammy, drawing the symbol on his flesh. Dean groaned, watching as Sammy was trying not to move. 

Dean groaned when he felt Sam move down his body, the man dragging his lips along Dean's skin. "Oh, fuck," Dean moaned as Sam's mouth wrapped around his cock. He snaked his fingers into Sam's hair biting his lips as he looked over, watching Dean put the mark on Sammy's chest. "Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God," Dean moaned, his hips thrusting upwards, his hands holding the older man in place. 

Dean soon found himself flipped over, Sam under him, letting Dean thrust into his mouth as Sam's hands ran along Dean's ass. His body was shaking with want, the feeling spiraling to new levels when Sam's large hand came down hard on his ass cheek, "Oh, fuck, Sam." The words came out brokenly as the older man rained smack after smack across the firm muscled cheeks. Dean came hard, his eyes locked on Sammy as Sam continued to suck his cock, letting the teen come down his throat. Sam's hands kept spanking him, pausing every so often to rub gently at the abused flesh.

Dean was pushed back against the bed once more, Sam straddling him, the tattoo gun in hand.

Sammy whimpered a little as the needle pressed against his skin, but not because it hurt, mostly it was because he could hear Dean coming undone across the room from him. The older Dean's eyes were focused in on Sammy's chest while he made the design. It took everything Sammy had not to grind his hips against the currently straddling him Dean, but he figured that would turn out for the worst if he moved too much. Dean smirked at him, "Don't worry Sammy Baby, just gonna take a little while." 

Hearing Sam and Dean was starting to become too much. Everything felt a little fuzzy around the edges. The needle drilling in a sign onto his skin, Sam and Dean moaning out in ecstasy, and Dean's ass pressed firmly against him. It was embarrassing how hard he was and it REALLY wasn't helping that Dean shifted every couple minutes to get a better angle. He heard his Dean cum and Sammy's cock was throbbing with need. He could barely stand it. He just needed a little...

"Fuck Dean!" he gasped and Dean pulled the needle away.

"Holy shit...did you just?" Dean cocked an eyebrow at him, "Goddammit Sammy, so fucking perfect," Dean kissed him roughly before getting back to work. 

\---

Dean bit his lip, eyes tightly shut, willing himself not to move. His body was already overly sensitive after the orgasm he just had and the feeling of Sam sitting on his hips, leaning over him marking him was almost too much. He knew he shouldn't move, shouldn't arch up against Sam's ass, but found it so hard not to. Dean groaned, the feeling of the needle on his flesh almost unbearable, not due to pain, but due to the intense pleasure it was causing to course through his body.

"Oh, fuck," he moaned, holding himself as still as possible. He heard the older Dean come over to the bed he lay on, the older man grabbing his hands and holding them above his head, preventing him from reaching out and grabbing Sam. Dean opened his eyes, looking up into the older Dean's eyes, silently thanking him. The older Dean leaned down, gently kissing him, distracting him as Sam continued working. 

He felt Sam's hand running along his chest, and realized that the man had finished. Dean let out a moan of lose when Sam stood up and the older Dean gave him one last kiss before moving to the other bed. Dean wasn't left alone for long though, as Sammy crawled on top of him, kissing him with a passion that was startling. Dean was achingly hard again and almost whimpered when Sammy's hand wrapped around his hard length, stroking him gently. 

Dean was about to start thrusting into Sammy's hand when he pulled it away, placing two fingers on Dean's lips to prevent him from complaining. Dean wanted to know what the younger boy had planned, but didn't have to wait long as Sammy straddled his body, taking Dean's cock inside of him in one slow movement. Dean watched in awe as his beloved Sammy rode him, the younger teen's head thrown back in ecstasy, his mouth open in a silent moan. 

The only sounds in the room were the sound of two bodies coming together again and again, and the tattoo gun. Dean turned his head briefly, to watch as Sam sat next to Dean, working a design into the man's right ass cheek, 2 D's intertwined with 2 S's. Dean swallowed hard, the meaning behind the mark quite clear. His attention was drawn back to Sammy, whose hands had started caressing Dean's body, fingers moving to pinch and stroke Dean's nipples.

Dean was always beautiful. He'd been beautiful since the moment that he walked over to Sammy on the first day of school. But Sammy would be lying if that tattoo didn't multiply how fucking sexy Dean was. Sammy rocked his hips against Dean, feeling every smooth slide of him. He leaned down to catch the boys lips on his own, kissing Dean would never get old. The boys hands came up and massaged through Sammy's hair, making him moan from all the stimulation.

"Look so sexy Dean, so perfect," he sucked on Dean's neck, "Love the way you feel, never had anything better."

Sammy started moving quicker, pressing his hands to Dean's chest for balance (but making sure not to press on the new ink). He was so focused in on Dean, Sammy couldn't think of anything else. The boy beneath him was the love of his life--even according to an angel for God's sake--and he knew that he'd never feel anything as good as Dean inside him, never wanted to feel anything better. His climax was coiling tightly in his stomach, just aching to be pushed over the edge. Sammy had his head tilted back when Dean gave his cock a tight stroke and then Sammy was gone. Back arching, muscles tightening, moans spilling, Sammy could do nothing but hold on as Dean stroked him through his orgasm.

He took a breath as the aftershocks started sinking in, "Come on Dean," he leaned forward to kiss the boy as he was thrusting up into him harshly now, "wanna feel you cum inside me, need Baby, need you."

Dean grabbed Sammy by the hips, surprising the younger teen by moving so Sammy was on his back, legs wrapped around Dean's waist. Dean started thrusting into him with steady strokes, his hands caressing Sammy's chest and neck, worshiping him like he was the only thing that mattered in the world, and for Dean he kinda was. The world could burn if it meant Sammy was safe, and Dean knew that he was never going to give him up for anything. 

Dean let his thrusts go slow, knowing that he was no where near cumming, due to the orgasm Sam had dragged from his body, so he wanted to spoil Sammy for anyone else. He leaned down, kissing Sammy gently, the movement causing their chests to rub against each other sending shocks of pleasure/pain through his body as his newly tattooed flesh rubbed against Sammy. He snaked his fingers into Sammy's hair, lightly scratching at his scalp, feeling the way Sammy's breathing had started to intensify.

Dean's lips left Sammy's briefly, as he moaned loudly at the feel of Sammy clenching around him, Sammy's cock rehardening between them, "Oh, fuck, Baby, getting hard again aren't you, you love when I take you like this, when I make you mine."

Sammy could only nod, his voice unable to cooperate at the moment. He loved when it was like this. Dean above him, taking what he wanted--giving Sammy what he needed. Everything was oversensitive and he felt like nothing was raw nerve endings. Every touch was an overwhelming sensation. Dean's thrusts were slow and steady, drawing out every feeling that Sammy was undergoing. All he could do was pant and gasp. At this point, Sammy was contemplating if he would ever be coherent again. 

He yanked him down into a kiss, needing all the contact he could get. They rolled their tongues together in rhythm with their hips. Sammy's moans were getting swallowed up in Dean's mouth. He felt like he might die if Dean didn't move a little faster, but the boy just kept his agonizing pace.

"Dean, please," Sammy whined, pulling away from the kiss-swollen lips. He groaned when Dean slowed down even more, "Not fair," Another whimper and whine fell from Sammy's mouth as his hands grabbed and scratched eagerly at Dean's shoulder-blades. 

Dean grinned, wanting to stay like this forever, locked with Sammy as he was, but he knew this would have to end eventually. He took pity on his lover, his beloved little brother, hand reaching between them to stroke Sammy's hard length. His thrusts became erratic, hips moving faster and faster as he panted against Sammy's throat, kissing and licking and biting gently at the sweat slicked flesh.

"Oh, god, Sammy, love you, Baby. Never gonna give you up, never leaving you. You and me, always and forever, Sammy," Dean moaned, his body shaking with strain as his orgasm approached. He shuddered, hand moving faster and faster along Sammy's length as he came deep inside the younger boy.

\---

Sam groaned, arms wrapped tightly around Dean, kissing his brother intensely. His body was shaking with want, the sounds coming from the other bed driving him to distraction, the feeling of the sheets rubbing against his new tattoo sending shocks of pleasure pain throughout his body. Sam's body arched off the bed as Dean slid slicked fingers inside him, twisting them around to brush against Sam's prostate. 

Sam let out a low moan when Dean shoved his arms off of him, the older man grabbing Sam and pinning his wrists above his head. Sam let his legs fall apart, wrapping them around Dean's hips as the older man slid into him in one fluid motion.

"Oh, fuck, Dean," he moaned, biting his lip in pleasure as his older brother began to thrust into his willing body.

Dean groaned, feeling Sam all around him. The man sprawled out beneath him, wrists pinned above his head, legs spread apart, Dean couldn't decide where he wanted to look. He could feel Sam clenching and releasing around him, teasing him up to the edge so quickly. He started thrusting faster and harder, enjoying each little breathy moan that Sam made. Things were so different than they used to be. Sam was so big now, body completely filled out and muscled. But it still felt just as good, maybe better. Dean leaned down to kiss him, intertwining their fingers together.

"Fuck Baby Boy," Dean breathed against Sam's neck, "Always so good, always so willing." He nipped at Sam's pulse before licking over it, "Always gonna be my Baby Boy aren't you?" His hips were moving relentlessly, Sam meeting each movement with desperation.

\---

Sammy came with one final stroke of Dean's hand. His hips arched underneath Dean, muscles trembling from the release. He could hear the other Sam and Dean, knew that they were enjoying themselves. But Sammy could hardly think about anything other than how Dean felt inside him while they both came down from their orgasmic high.

"I love you," he stroked a hand through Dean's hair, admiring how soft it was. Dean kissed him in response, relaxing against Sammy's body.

Dean let out a muffled curse, falling against Sammy's body. He kissed the younger teen, a kiss of devotion and reverence, the hunger that had filled his prior kisses sated for now. He held onto Sammy, rolling them so the smaller boy was on top, running his hands soothingly along his heated flesh. 

They dozed for a while, limbs locked together, just content to be in each other's arms. Dean awoke to being gently shaken, blinking up into the older Dean's gaze. Dean smiled, enjoying the feeling of the older man petting his hair as Sammy napped on top of him. He accepted the older Dean's kiss, moaning a bit in loss as Sam moved Sammy off of him, the older man settling Sammy against his chest.

Dean let himself be turned over, moaning loudly when the older man bit down gently on his ass cheek. The wounded flesh was kissed gently, the older Dean's lips and tongue trailing over the abused flesh. 

\---

Sam held Sammy against his chest, nuzzling the teen's neck as they watched the older Dean begin to work on Sammy's Dean's new tattoo. "After he's done, I'm gonna give you yours. The same one my Dean has, the same one your Dean is getting right now, the same one I have on me. Gonna mark you as ours, Baby. Gonna make sure you know that you belong to the three of us and we belong to you."

Dean stared down at his younger self, watching his skin redden from the bite mark. "Gonna mark you Dean Baby, make you ours," Dean rubbed the boy's back soothingly before he started in. He saw how the boy's muscles twitch as he tried to resist moving away from the needle. Dean had to force himself to focus on what he was doing. Perhaps he could've chosen a slightly better spot for this tattoo if he had wanted to be completely focused on what he was doing.

He glanced over at the Sams. Sam and his eyes met before his brother gave him a small grin. Dean was trying to remember when the last time that he saw his brother this relaxed and happy was. He was almost willing to say never. But Dean also had a tendency to not count the years Sam was at Stanford. He returned back to his work on Dean's ass--which he had to admit he was doing a good job on.

\---

Sammy bit his lip to keep from flinching. Sam was running a hand gently over Sammy's skin while he worked, helping the boy stay calm; however, not helping the boy's hormones much. 

Sammy couldn't believe that this was his second tattoo in one day. Then again, Sammy was having a hard time believing that any of this was true. He felt like he was living in some weird, alternate universe where things weren't quite as bad. Then he realized that's exactly what Sam and Dean were literally going through. They had been thrown into an alternate universe, and Sammy could only hope that they thought things were pretty nice here. He didn't want to think about the chances of them ever leaving.


	9. Love and Regret

Dean woke with a smile on his face, arms wrapped around his beloved Sammy, Sam wrapped around him from behind, the older Dean curled up behind Sammy. The four of them had fallen asleep in the same bed, making it a bit awkward to sleep, but none of them had wanted to move. Their limbs had intertwined at some point during the night, and Dean knew that if he wanted to get up he'd have to wake all three of his bedmates. He was about to let sleep overtake him again when he felt a gentle kiss being placed on his shoulder.

He turned his head, accepting a kiss of good morning from Sam, the movement seeming to pull Sammy out of his slumber. Dean bit back a moan when he felt Sammy leaning in to kiss at his neck. The feeling of both of them, his Sammy and his Sam kissing him first thing in the morning was overwhelming. He couldn't help but moan when he felt a third set of lips on him, Dean, placing a gentle kiss on his forehead.

Dean groaned, the kisses quickly turning from soft sweet good morning kisses to ones that spoke of lust and passion. He wasn't sure if he was gonna be able to handle everything he was feeling, but damn it would be a great way to go out. He soon found himself laying atop Sam, the older man thrusting into him as Sammy rode Dean's hard cock. The older Dean was kneeling between Sam's legs, thrusting into Sam as Sam thrust into Dean. The positioning should have been awkward, should have been clumsy but it was like the four of them were a well oiled machine, each one moving in just the way needed to give the most pleasure to their partners. 

Dean let out a muffled curse as he watched Sammy's head fall back onto the older Dean's shoulder, the man wrapping his hand around Sammy's erection, making sure that all parties were being taken care of. "What a way... what a way to wake up," Dean moaned, letting out a curse when Sam bit down on his shoulder. 

Dean licked his lips, watching as Sammy trembled above him, knowing that his Beloved was close, "Cum for me, Sammy." Dean couldn't help the lust filled moan that fell from his lips watching Sammy lose it above him, the younger teen cumming all over Dean's chest. The feeling of Sammy clenching around him was enough to send Dean over the edge, cumming hard into his lover's body. 

Dean heard a muffled yelp, and could feel Sam reaching his orgasm, the feeling of the man's hot cum filling him made Dean moan. He could hear it when the older Dean came, the curses falling from his mouth. Dean looked up, watching as the older man rested his head on Sammy's shoulder, kissing and licking the flesh, his body shaking as he came inside Sam.

They fell together in a pile of limbs, all four males panting from exhaustion. Dean knew they should move, but was too content, too tired to do anything but pull Sammy against him, nuzzling at the younger boy's neck as he fell asleep, never pulling out of his body.

Sammy woke, groggy and disoriented, but he could feel Dean snuggled up against him, so it was all okay. He opened his eyes, trying to to wake up Dean. He noticed that the older Dean and Sam were already awake and talking to each other outside of the motel room window. He could feel that Dean still hadn't pulled out, both of them wrapped together too tightly to move much while they slept. Sammy shifted his hips just any and sucked in a breath when Dean's softened cock slipped out.

Definitely in need of shower, Sammy slowly untangled himself from Dean--the boy obviously too exhausted to wake up. The motel room's shower was small, but it worked. He fumbled with the nobs until he got the temperature right. He felt like it had been days since he'd showered, even though that wasn't even remotely true. Sweat and cum had dried on his skin--not that he was complaining too much about it--and he let the water wash it all away. Sammy winced when the water hit his two fresh tattoos and he jerked out of reach from the water. He bit his lip while he washed them as gently as he could. Quickly, he scrubbed the mop of hair on his head and rinsed it out. Once again, he was gentle when he dried off his tattoos. They'd hurt a little more than he thought they might.

\---

Sam was pacing around Dean. "So...you're saying that Gabriel's been hiding out here?" Dean asked his brother.

"Castiel just said that Gabriel was here and has been for a long time," Sam looked like he couldn't choose between being happy that the angel was alive or confused over the whole situation. Then again, Dean was confused most of the time that they'd spent in this universe.

"So...that's good right?" Dean shrugged, "I mean, Gabriel can be a little bitch sometimes, but he'd not too bad...sometimes..."

"It's not that," Sam gave Dean that 'why are you so stupid and how am I related to you' look, "If Gabriel's here, who knows what else is here. We know that there's monsters and spirits and all of that, because Mary and Sammy are hunters, but now that angels are thrown into it. I don't know Dean, what if everything happens all over again to Sammy and Dean?"

Dean could see the concerned look on his brother's face. He hadn't really thought about that, never really thought about the things that they had been through in the past few years somehow applying to this universe. Dean didn't know how this all worked though. He wasn't sure how closely these realities were related. "Well...looks like we're gonna have to have a little sit-down with Cas. Surely he knows what's going on."

\---

Dean blinked his eyes open, noticing that he was completely alone in the bed. He rolled over sleepily, throwing out a hand to the side. He sat up, looking around, his mind still fuzzy. He wasn't completely sure where he was, the room looked semi-familiar, but then again most motel rooms did. He stood, grabbing his clothes and dragging them on, panicking in his half awake state. He slid into his shoes, moving towards the door, mind racing. 

Shame coursed through his body, what had happened? Had he slipped up and gone back to his old ways, betraying Sammy to get his fix? He felt jumpy, blissed out like he always felt when he was using, so he assumed that had to be the case. Dean opened the door, running out of the room and into the parking lot, tears stinging at his cheeks. He made it as far as the alley between the motel and the diner before falling to his knees, tears streaming down his face.

Dean couldn't understand why he had done what he had done, he had been clean for well over a year by the time he met Sammy, and yet... He shoved his hands against his face, trying to calm himself down, not noticing the cold seeping into his flesh from the ground under him. He hurt, and not just a physical ache, but a soul crushing hatred of himself for whatever he had done. His chest hurt, and he rubbed blindly at it, shocks of pain flooding him.

\---

Sam and Dean walked back into the motel room with bags of take out from the diner. They knew the boys would be hungry after the night and morning the four of them had shared. They noticed the room was empty but assumed that both teens were in the shower as they heard the shower running. That is until they noticed Dean's clothes were missing. Sam swallowed hard, wondering what had happened to the young man, wondering why he had left.

He walked to the bathroom, popping his head inside and questioned Sammy if he knew where Dean had taken off to. At Sammy's confused stare, Sam realized that Dean must have left after Sammy had went into the bathroom, so he couldn't have been gone long. He looked around the room, nothing of Dean's remained in the room, not even his overnight bag. Something was very wrong.

Sam asked Dean to stay and wait for Sammy to get out of the bathroom before walking out the door, trying to figure out which way the teen had went. He heard sobbing coming from the alley and walked towards the sound, hoping that it wasn't Dean.

What he saw broke his heart, Dean was practically curled up in a ball, shivering in cold and tears. He was staring blankly ahead and had bitten his lower lip bloody. Sam approached cautiously, not wanting to scare the obviously distressed teen.

\---

Dean heard footfalls approaching him and turned to face the noise. He couldn't see clearly, still lost in his thoughts, but the figure approaching him was huge. "I'm sorry, I'll behave, just don't tell him, you can't let Sammy know," he whispered brokenly, reaching out to grab at the figures' legs, meaning to satisfy the man so he would just leave Dean be. His hands were gently pushed away and Dean was pulled to his feet, engulfed in a bear hug. He stilled in the man's arms, still not quite all together. 

The man that held him felt safe, smelled familiar. "Can't tell him, please, I'll do whatever you want, just don't... he can't know I screwed up, can't know what I did."

The man rubbed his hands along Dean's back soothingly, rocking him against him, talking in calm quiet tones, begging Dean to see him, to really see him.

Dean looked up into hazel eyes, and recognition came to him. He swallowed hard, letting Sam just hold him as he cried. "Why did I think... how could I have thought that I?"

\---

Seeing Dean so damaged hurt Sam to the core, but part of him understood what might have caused his reaction. The combination of the pain from the tattoos and the pleasure from the multiple orgasms had probably done a number on his body, making him feel as if he had been using again. Add to that Dean waking up alone in a motel room, half out of it because he wasn't fully awake. 

Sam wished he could do something more than he was, that he could fix the teen, but knew that there was only so much one man could accomplish. He led Dean back towards the motel, rubbing soothing circles on his back. As soon as they were inside Sam saw the looks on Sammy and Dean's faces. He could tell they wanted to know just what had happened and why Dean looked the way he did.

But there was time for questions later. Dean was still shaking, and Sam could tell he was freezing. He slowly undressed the teen and helped him towards the bathroom. He turned on the shower, moving Dean into the warm water. He knew Dean was going to have trouble standing by the way he was shaking so hard so he had the younger man grab onto the wall before turning to undress. Sam slid into the shower behind Dean, pulling the teen against his chest, whispering soothing words to the boy as the water warmed them both. 

"It's gonna be alright, Dean," Sam promised, hoping beyond all hope that he wasn't lying, that he would be able to stick to his word.

\---

Sammy couldn't stop pacing back and forth in the room after he got out of the shower. Where had Dean gone? Why'd he go? He didn't like this. He didn't like it when he wasn't sure that Dean was 100% okay, it was more than Sammy cared to handle--could handle. "I shouldn't have gotten up, should've stayed with him," Sammy wiped some stray water from his hair off of his cheeks.

"He's probably fine Sammy," Dean watched the boy walk around the room, "It's not your fault." 

Just as Sammy was about to protest, Sam and Dean walked through the door. His Dean looked exhausted, scared, and tears were still in his eyes. Sammy wanted to just run up and check on him, hold him, but Sam exchanged a look with older Dean and just guided the teen into the bathroom.

\---

Dean was shocked with how the boy looked when Sam brought him in. He was all roughed up, shivering, and he had obviously been crying. It was frightening to look at him like that, a face that he had seen in the mirror a few times himself. He watched Sam guide the boy in the bathroom--the poor kid needed a shower. Dean still wasn't quite sure what had happened, but by the look that Sam had given him, it was obviously a more sensitive subject. He noticed that Sammy was still staring wide-eyed at the bathroom door, just waiting.

"He'll be okay Sammy, just shook up s'all," Dean stood up, taking a step towards Sammy.

"I didn't mean to let him out of my sight," Suddenly, Dean was being tugged in for an almost too-tight hug. 

"Shhh....hey now, it's okay Sammy," Dean hugged the boy back, it reminded him of a lot of things--a lot of memories. He could feel the boy's shoulders shaking, Sammy not being able to keep himself from crying. Dean heard the water shut off and after a few minutes the door opened.

\---

Sammy practically ran right past Sam, shoving his way into the bathroom. Dean was pulling on a pair of jeans, still obviously exhausted. He pulled his boyfriend close, feeling his warm, damp skin. When he pulled away, he cradled Dean's face in his hands. "Never do that to me again," Sammy pressed their foreheads together, "Never leave me, you're not allowed to leave me," He could feel the tears welling up in his eyes again. 

He kissed Dean, again and again. "I was so worried, I love you so much," His words were only interrupted by chaste kisses. Dean was leaning against him, so Sammy just held on tighter.

\---

Dean was still shaking a bit, but having Sammy holding onto him tightly was starting to help. He hadn't had a flashback like that since he met Sammy, and yet... Dean somewhat knew what the cause had been. The last few days had been overwhelming on an emotional level. Dean had been riding on emotional highs and lows, add to that the physical drain he had been through in the last 24 hours, and it was no wonder his mind had played the tricks it had on him.

He knew he had scared the others and wished he could fix them. Sammy looked so miserable, and earlier that morning he had been smiling more brightly than Dean had ever seen before in his life. He ran his fingers through Sammy's hair, placing a gentle kiss against his lips, "This isn't your fault, Baby. Not your fault. Don't feel guilty, you didn't do anything wrong. This is my issue, it's nothing you did wrong. I'm not gonna lose you, never gonna leave you. I thought... for some reason I was having a flashback to before we met when I woke up. Didn't know where I was or what I had done and I panicked."

Dean rocked in Sammy's arms, "Thought I used again, and... and cheated on you. Wanted to die for betraying you. God, Baby Boy, felt so damn guilty, thought I had... thought I had destroyed what we had. My only thought was how sorry I was, how bad I felt for losing your trust, for letting someone have what wasn't theirs. Sammy, you're my everything. You know that, right? I belong to you, always gonna be yours, never leave you. And as much as I belong to Sam and Dean, you are my top priority. You have to believe that. I know I'm not good enough for you... you shouldn't want me... but you do and I can't stop thinking I'm gonna screw up."

Dean was sobbing again by that point, face buried against Sammy's shoulder, arms wrapped tightly around the younger boy. He couldn't lose Sammy, Sammy was the only thing that was keeping him sane, was keeping him clean. He had been so close to using again or just ending everything when Sammy had shown up like an answer to his prayers.

Dean loved the older Sam and Dean, he truly did, how could he not. Sam was his Sammy, and Dean was him. But Sammy was his world. Waking up alone in the motel room feeling like he had had thrown him for a loop. Dean knew he should talk to someone, get counselling or something, but was too ashamed to get help. He had made terrible choices, and didn't want his past to end up destroying Sammy. Dean never wanted to leave Sammy, never wanted to let him go... but he knew he would if it was for the best... if it would save Sammy, save him from Dean himself. Dean hoped it would never come to that.

Sammy ran his fingers through Dean's hair, letting him rest his head in Sammy's shoulder. He hushed him a few times, holding onto to him tightly. "Dean it's okay, I know it isn't easy for you. You're so much more than good enough. Dean, I love you more than..." Sammy paused. How could he possibly explain how much he loved Dean? "I love you more than fucking anything else. Anything. Nothing is more important to me than you. You seem to think that I don't have a billion reasons to love you, and the thing is," Sammy chuckled, pressing a kiss onto Dean's head, "there are so many reasons to love you, that no one could possibly count them all."

They stood like that for a few minutes, Dean just letting Sammy hold him. Sam didn't mind, he liked the closeness. He did mind how much he knew Dean was hurting. He minded how scared and lost Dean had looked. Sammy hated seeing Dean like that. He liked when Dean was smiling or laughing or anything that wasn't related to sadness. Seeing Dean like this made him wonder how terrifying it must've been for John to find him in that motel room back then. It almost made him shudder at the thought of seeing Dean all beat up. He'd seen his own reflection beat up too many times, he doubted he could handle seeing Dean like that.

"Dean," Sammy pulled away, thumbs running over drying tear tracks, "I...I don't want to pressure you or anything like that. You know I'd never want to hurt you or let anything hurt you," He stared into bloodshot eyes, but the green still shown vibrantly, "But I was thinking...you know maybe you need to talk to somebody. You know that I'd always let you talk to me. You can tell me anything, but I understand if maybe it's a bit too much for you to tell me." He was being honest. He understood what it felt like to not be able to tell anyone about something. Sammy knew that sometimes you just couldn't tell the people you loved, despite how much you wanted to. "But I think you need...It's still hurting you Dean, and--and I don't like seeing you hurt. I don't want you to never be able to move on from all of that. I don't want you to wake up scared."

Sammy was praying that he hadn't pushed too hard. He didn't want to make Dean anymore upset than he already was. However, Dean needed something. He wasn't okay. Sam loved him with all of his heart, but he knew that Dean wasn't okay. Dean needed to be able to talk about all the shit from his past. Whether he talked about it to Sam or the other Sam or the other Dean or a professional--whoever--didn't matter. Dean was hurting and Sam didn't want him to hurt.

\---

John drove around town in a panic, trying to figure out where Dean had disappeared off to. His mind kept going back to over a year and a half ago when he had found his son in a seedy motel, broken, bruised, and bloody, just lying there as if he was waiting for death. John was terrified, he knew his son had been through a lot during that time and he was afraid that the stress of the last few days had been enough to send Dean back to the place he had been.

John knew he should have gotten Dean help, real help, professional help, but he didn't and if anything had happened to Dean, had pushed Dean back to that dark place John felt that it rested on his head. He drove past one of the motels in town, turning around when he saw Sam and Dean's Impala. He parked next to the car, planning on asking the men to help him find his boy.

John knocked on the room door, only having to wait a few seconds before Sam was opening it and motioning John inside. The sight that greeted him had John stopping in his tracks, tears starting to form in his eyes. Sammy was holding Dean against his chest, rocking the older teen in his arms. Dean was shirtless, and from his angle John could see the tattoo over Dean's heart. 

The older Dean was sitting on the other bed, rubbing his hand over his face, looking about as lost as John felt. He looked back to Sam, noticing that the man had the same look on his face.

John could hear Sammy whispering to Dean that he loved him, that everything was going to be okay, that he wanted Dean to talk to someone, anyone, to help him get through what he was dealing with, and John felt as if he had been slapped in the face. He knew he had failed his son, and this was just more proof of it.

"Dean," John said softly, getting his son's attention. He soon found his arms filled with his sobbing son, the teen clinging to him, repeating over and over again how sorry he was. John held onto him, feeling Sammy wrap his arms around Dean from behind. He reached his arm out, wrapping it around Sammy as well, holding his boys against him, wishing that he could do more to fix them.

\---

Sammy let John hug both of them, but he had his arms tightly wound around Dean's waist. He nuzzled his face into Dean's neck, wishing that he would just will Dean's pain away. He didn't blame John for all of this. This time it wasn't John's fault. There was nothing that he could've done to stop Dean back then. Dean had been an addict. Sammy knew that Dean probably wasn't even the same person back then as he was now--although this morning had been a little bit of a sneak peek into what Dean used to be. It scared Sammy to know that Dean used to be so drugged out and used. It angered him. He could not understand how anyone could ever use Dean like that.

"It's okay Dean," Sammy mumbled against the boy's skin.

\---

Dean watched the scene playing out before him. He wondered if his own father would've ever reacted like this. Maybe. Maybe not. He supposed it would've depended on what they were doing and how important the overall objective was. Dean glanced over at Sam who was watching everything too--probably even wondering the same thing.

He heard Sammy tell the boy that it was okay, and that's how he knew that it was his brother. On the days when he felt like he and Sam were nothing like Sammy and Dean, it was things like that that changed his mind. He couldn't remember how many times they had told each other that things would be okay. He also couldn't remember how many times that had been a complete lie. Dean hoped that this time it wasn't a lie, it had been heart-wrenching to see the boy like this.

"It'll be okay Dean," Sam laced their fingers, barely whispering the words.

\---

Dean wasn't sure how long they stayed like that. When he finally stopped crying he looked up a his dad, embarrassment coloring his cheeks. He gently pushed his father's arms off of him, hand moving to grab Sammy's. He turned a bit, pulling Sammy against his chest, and kissed him softly, "Thank you, Sweetie. You don't know how much you being here for me means to me. I'd be lost without you by my side."

He turned to look at his father, noticing that the man was looking slightly uncomfortable with how the boys were holding onto each other. "Dad... thank you... just thank you for worrying, for giving a damn."

John looked at him, "Dean, you're my son. Of course I'm gonna worry, of course I give a damn. I know I wasn't always the best father, that I failed you in a lot of ways, but I swear Dean, I will do whatever I can, whatever it takes to help you. And I know... know I wasn't in your life before, Sammy, and that you and I got off to a bad start, but I want you to know that the same goes for you. You're my family, and it's my duty, my privilege to take care of you."

John smiled at the teens before turning his gaze to the older Sam and Dean. "I'm not sure what kind of relationship you two had with your father, but I'd be honored to be part of you lives. You two... you're just as much my boys as these two are, and I know you've been through things I can't even begin to contemplate. But, I'm here for you, I want you to know that, need you to know that you can turn to me for anything.

He watched as Sam swallowed hard, a few tears threatening to fall.

\---

Dean couldn't believe the words coming out of his--Sammy's and Dean's--father's mouth. He couldn't imagine his own father ever saying anything like that. There had been a few moments in his life where his father had said something that made him seem like something more than a drill sergeant. He and Sam had never gotten to be much more than soldiers for their dad. But through it all, Dean still loved him. Through it all, John was still his father, was still family, and still mattered. But this? This was a different John, who had a different life, and who obviously thought different things. 

"Yeah," Dean nodded, "We got it." Dean clenched his jaw, making the tears stay away. He looked over at Sam, who was staring a hole into the floor, and wondered what he was thinking. He was pretty sure that Sam was about to have a heart attack over the things they just heard John tell the boys and them. "Thank you John." Dean watched Sam finally look up from his feet, his eyes still having a contemplating look.

\---

"Mary, I do not feel comfortable in this," Castiel spoke, knowing that Mary could hear him on the other side of the door.

"You could wear your coat over it if you want," Mary smiled even though he couldn't see her, "Come on Castiel, I just want to see what you look like."

She waited patiently a few more minutes for the door to open. When he came out she grinned widely. Mary had convinced him to try on some jeans and a t-shirt. He looked...different. He looked relaxed. "You look," she glanced over him, "really good."

"This is aesthetically pleasing?" He looked down at his clothing.

"Very much so," she wrapped her arms around his neck, "Do you want your coat?" Mary almost chuckled, but she could see the uncomfortable look in his eyes. After all, he had worn that same set of clothes for as long as she had known him.

"Yes," he ducked his head, but it only made Mary smile more. 

\---

Dean and Sammy walked into Mary's house and immediately saw that Castiel was dressed in different clothing than they had seen him in. They smiled at Mary and Cas, noticing how both of them seemed to be blushing and embarrassed. With a wave to the adults the two teens made their way upstairs so Sammy could pack a bag, they were planning on heading to Bobby's for the rest of the day, in order for some alone time and in order for Dean to have a place he felt comfortable to talk at.

As Sammy was packing his bags he kept looking over at Dean, as if making sure he was still there. "Not leaving you, Baby. Need you too damn much, Sammy," Dean said, reaching over to brush Sammy's hair off of his face, tilting the younger teen's face up to kiss him gently.

He watched with a smile, not his usual one, but close enough, as Sammy stripped off his shirt, planning on changing into a different one before they hit the road. Dean heard a gasp and noticed Mary standing in the doorway, her eyes drawn to the tattoo on Sammy's chest.

"Sammy, what is that?" she asked, a hint of anger in her voice.

Dean was worried, worried that Mary would be mad at them for getting the mark, that she might ground Sammy and send Dean home. He needed his Sammy right now, needed to be with him and if they were separated Dean didn't know if he could handle it.

\---

"Uhh..." Sam glanced down at his chest, knowing exactly what his mom was asking about. "It's an anti-possession tattoo." He cleared his throat, "We thought that it might be a good idea since, you know, John got possessed and stuff. We just thought it would be a good idea. Honestly, I don't know why I didn't do this a long time ago."

"Where'd you get it done?" Mary raised an eyebrow.

"Sam and Dean gave us both one," Sam motioned his head towards Dean.

"Honey," Mary shook her head and rolled her eyes, but her expression had softened, "I could've taken you somewhere and gotten you one."

Sammy shrugged and pulled his shirt over his head, "I don't know, they did an all right job."

"Where're you going?" She pointed at the bag, but she was obviously not upset. Sammy was happy that the tattoo didn't upset his mom...although, he wasn't planning on telling her about the other one. What she didn't know couldn't hurt her right? Hopefully. 

"We're just going to go hang out at Bobby's place," he continued putting a couple more things in his bag and Mary nodded in approval before going back downstairs. 

Sammy looked over at Dean and smiled. He couldn't help but smile when he saw the boy. Dean was his everything, all just standing right there beside him. He pulled Dean into a kiss, letting their lips linger for a few seconds, just embracing the feeling of it. He was never going to be able to get enough of Dean. He was never going to love anyone like this. With Dean, it was all different and special. They had been completely bonded together from the moment they met and Sammy didn't see that changing any time soon.

\---

"The boys are staying at Bobby's," Mary smiled as she watched Castiel attempting to figure out the coffee maker.

"Okay," Castiel frowned at the machine. Mary walked over to help him. After all, she knew that he wasn't trying to make coffee for himself. He was trying to do something nice for her, which was extraordinarily sweet and had Mary grinning from ear to ear.

"I was thinking," Mary turned her eyes away from him, filling the filter with coffee grounds, "maybe you could sleep in my bed...with me."

"I do not require rest and I've already laid in your bed with you before," Castiel glanced up at her.

"That wasn't really what I was implying," she pulled the angel down for a kiss. Castiel was starting to react a little quicker to her kisses, but he still had that initial shock each time. Part of Mary really loved that.

Castiel was trying to wrap his head around the change in his and Mary's relationship. While he was enjoying the attention, the kisses they shared, he was still very confused about the whole thing. He had never been involved in any sort of relationship like the one his friendship with Mary was becoming. He flushed with embarrassment when her meaning became clear, when he understood what she was asking of him. He nodded at her, letting her take him by the hand towards her room.

\---

Dean and Sammy headed over to Dean's house to grab some clothes for him. They went upstairs and Dean quickly threw some clothing into an overnight bag. He smiled at Sammy, pulling the younger teen against his chest, tilting his face up so they could share a brief kiss. "You and me, all alone, no one around. God, Baby, don't have to keep quiet. Can't wait to just be alone with you."

Dean grinned as Sammy moaned lightly, the younger boy licking his lips at the thought. They kissed again, before making their way down the stairs. Dean saw his father and Bobby sitting on the couch and stopped in front of the men. "So... so Sammy and I are gonna go out to your place, Bobby, overnight. We need... we need some time alone, after... after this weekend... and this morning," Dean shuddered. He noticed the sympathetic looks he was receiving from both his father and the other man. He knew that Bobby had known about the troubles Dean had had in the past, and had never judged Dean. It was just one more reason that Dean loved having Bobby in his life.

Bobby nodded, knowing both boys knew where his spare keys were located. John hadn't told him what had happened that morning, but Bobby could tell by the haunted look in Dean's eyes that something had probably triggered a flashback. Even had the boys not been planning to go to his place Bobby would have offered it to them, they needed it.

\---

The drive out was almost silent, save for music lightly coming from the radio. It wasn't as though Dean didn't want to talk to Sammy, he knew he'd need all his concentration for their discussion and he couldn't give him that while driving. Dean was smiling, as Sammy had laid his hand on Dean's thigh the minute they got into the car and still hadn't removed it. Dean kept sneaking glances over at Sammy, seeing the boy watching him intently, biting his lip deep in thought. When they pulled up to Bobby's and parked, Dean turned in his seat, leaning towards Sammy to kiss him once more.

His fingers snaked into Sammy's hair as their tongues dueled. Dean couldn't help himself as one of his hands reached down and started gently groping at Sammy's crotch. He pulled back briefly, unbuttoning the younger teen's jeans, watching the way Sammy arched into his hand. He pushed Sammy back against the seat, leaning forward to nuzzle at the skin of Sammy's stomach. He shoved the jeans down a bit more, letting Sammy's hard cock slip free. 

"Love you, Baby Boy," he said softly, before licking at the tip. He needed to feel Sammy lose it for him, needed this connection. Dean took the hard length into his mouth, licking and sucking at it like it was the best thing in the world. He could feel Sammy's hands in his hair, holding his head in place. He looked up, locking his eyes with Sammy's as he moaned around the younger teen's cock. Few things felt better than taking care of his beloved like this. 

"D-D-Dean...oh fuck," Sammy was gasping at the feel of Dean's mouth on him, but he hadn't meant for this to happen right off the bat. "Shouldn't we be...oh god Dean, shouldn't we be t-t-talking about mmm," He was struggling to say the words, Dean obviously not slowing down or slacking at all in technique. Sammy wasn't even standing, but he still felt that almost-falling sensation. God, he knew that they needed to talk about everything. He knew that they needed to discuss what had happened this morning, how Dean felt about it. 

It took every piece of will power that anyone had ever had in the history of the universe for Sammy to push Dean away; he couldn't felt but groan at the loss and noticed that Dean did too. "Dean," Sammy took a deep breath, "you know I love this..." he glanced down at the part of his body that currently hated him, "obviously, but...but I don't want you to use this to cover things up. You can't just...Sex won't make things go away Dean. I just don't want you doing this if you're using it as a way to avoid talking about today...and the things that have happened to you..." Sammy worried that he was being too harsh and it wasn't helping that a little ache was starting to settle in his groin. 

"Dean, I love you...I just...I'm worried about you," Sammy kept staring into those green eyes, hoping that maybe they would understand what he meant. There wasn't a whole lot that Sammy liked more than their sex life, but he didn't want it to just be used as a way for Dean to avoid things. Sammy didn't want that to be the meaning of it. He wanted it to matter.

\---

Mary led Castiel into her room, holding his hand. She could see how nervous he was when they were standing in the room by themselves. Mary kissed him softly, but it felt more intimate than their other kisses. She had known the angel for years, for over a decade. Mary had no doubt that she was falling in love with him--which was a little frightening. However, she did have doubts about how he felt. She was scared of pushing him too hard, she didn't want to hurt him.

"Cas...are you...I don't want to push you," Mary looked up into his eyes, trying to find an unsaid response, "We don't have to do anything..." She trailed off. She sounded like an adolescent boy. How else was she supposed to say it though? She really didn't want to push him into anything that he didn't want. It wasn't like she was incapable of waiting; she just really cared about Castiel.

\---

Dean sighed, his hands resting on Sammy's thighs, nuzzling his cheek against Sammy's hip. "I'm not trying to ignore the talk, Sammy. I just... I need to help us get the edge off before. It's... I just need this right now, okay. We'll talk as soon as we get inside. I just wanna... I have to do this right now. Fuck, Sammy, always want you, and if I don't... if we don't take the edge off, I'll never be able to talk. Let me, please," he looked up into Sammy's eyes, willing Sammy to see the truth in his words.

\---

Bobby was grinning, lost in thought as he and John sat watching the television. He knew that John would talk to him when he was able, and knew that no matter what he would be there for the man. Bobby didn't understand his friendship with John sometimes, it was unlike any of his other friendships. He knew he thought about the other man more than he should, sometimes he wished that John lived closer, hell lived with him, so they could talk more often. 

He caught John watching him, realizing that the other man was giving him a questioning look, "What?"

John laughed, amused at the caught with his hand in the cookie jar look that the other man was wearing. He cleared his throat, suddenly and unexpectantly nervous, "What are you thinking about that has you smiling like that?"

Bobby got a thoughtful look on his face, "Not much. Our boys, the older two, you."

John smiled, he had always loved it when Bobby would refer to Dean as "their boy". In a lot of ways he was. Bobby had been a big part of Dean's life, a second father to him in many ways. Part of John, a big part, had wished that they could have been around Bobby more when Dean was growing up, but John had never wanted to intrude on the man's life. "I know I haven't been the best father to Dean, and hell, you're more Sammy's dad than I'll ever be, Bobby. For that I am thankful. I'm not sure if you know how much I appreciate all you've done for us. Especially two years ago with Dean. I should have taken him for professional help but my first instinct was to go to you. You have no clue what that means to me."

Bobby nodded, "I'd do anything for you and your boys, you idjit. You know that, don't you?" He watched John, trying to see if the man was understanding what he really meant, hell Bobby wasn't quite sure exactly what he meant.

John swallowed hard, nodding once. He wasn't quite sure what was going on between him and Bobby, but he wasn't complaining. 

\---

In their motel room, Sam was starting to think that Dean was trying to kill him with pleasure. Sam was naked on his back, Dean draped over him, the older hunter stretching Sam's body with knowing movements. His hips kept arching off the bed, legs spread wide giving Dean ample access to his hole. Dean had been teasing him for a while now, and Sam didn't know how much more he could take.

Sam let out a low moan, his hands running along Dean's chest. He smiled, arching up against his brother as Dean kissed his neck, the older man's hand slowly driving him crazy with lust. "Fuck, Dean, please. Need you, come on, I'm ready, stop teasing."

Sam let out a happy little yelp when Dean bit down on his earlobe, telling him that they had time and Dean wasn't going to rush things. His body was trembling under Dean, so turned on that he was sure he was going to cum before Dean was inside him. "Please, Dean, don't want to cum without you in me." Sam bit back a curse when Dean told him that he was planning on having Sam cum more than once for him. 

\---

Castiel sat down on the bed where Mary indicated, smiling at her. There was a lot he didn't understand, but he had an idea of where this was leading. He leaned towards Mary, kissing her gently. The small breathy moan that slipped out of her mouth was making him hard in his pants. Castiel was amazed that he was effecting her in such a way, proud that he was the one who was making her feel like that.

He let out a moan of his own when her hand reached out and rested over the fly of his pants, lightly kneading at the hardening flesh. "Mary," he said, shocked at the tone of his voice, "please." Castiel wasn't completely sure what he was asking for, but wanted whatever Mary would be willing to give him.

Mary shoved at Castiel's coat and he shrugged it off, taking the hint. Kissing him again, she tugged his t-shirt up--loving the fact that he had put it on in the first place--and pulled away long enough to pull it over his head. Her hands trailed over the skin she hadn't seen before, admiring it. Mary's fingers trailed down to the button on his jeans. When she unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, Castiel made a soft gasping noise. She had almost forgotten that this was all new to him. She wondered if he'd ever done anything like this, but she didn't want to embarrass him, so she didn't bring it up. Mary tugged on the fabric, but Castiel stayed sitting. She couldn't help up chuckle a little, and then suddenly he understood and shifted his hips up.

"If you want me to stop just tell me," Mary made sure to note, just in case. Although, she doubted that he would stop her. She sank down to the floor and pulled him closer to the edge of the bed. It had been awhile, but at least there wasn't much he could compare her to. Her hands pushed his legs apart. Cas was staring down at her, lips slightly parted, and eyes darkened with need. He looked sexy like that. 

Castiel's breath got sharper when she wrapped her fingers around his cock, giving it one gentle tug. He groaned like he had never felt anything so amazing. Slowly, she swirled her tongue around the tip, basking in the sounds he was making. She ran her free hand up and down his thigh, noticing how tense the muscles were.

\---

"Okay," Sammy reached a hand out to touch Dean's cheek, "I just...I love you..." Sammy gave a small smile down at his Dean, loving the way Dean was looking at him. He moaned when Dean's mouth was on him again. Rolling his tongue and moaning around Sammy's cock, Sammy was about to die. He would never understand how Dean was so good at all this. Maybe some people would make some comment over how much practice Dean had, but Sammy didn't think that was it. Dean just knew Sammy, knew every part of him, knew exactly how to make his body react.

He felt Dean's continuous moans and knew he was touching himself. God, it just made it that much better. It wasn't going to take very long, not like this. 

\---

"Shh, I'm gonna take care of you Baby Boy," Dean pressed kisses on Sam's shoulders. "Always take care of you." He continued to tease with his fingers, pressing against that spot that had Sam writhing beneath him. For a moment, he contemplated making Sam cum just like this. So little real stimulation, knowing that Sam was still on the verge of losing it. Instead, he took pity on the man, pressed himself up against Sam's tight hole. "Sound so pretty when you bed Sammy-Boy," Dean moaned when he slid all the way in. He only look a brief moment for Sam to adjust before pulling out and slamming back in. "Can't wait to hear you cum for me Baby," Dean knew that he was teasing, knew that he was just driving Sam mad--but he liked it.

He kept his pace excruciatingly slow, even for him, but it was worth it to see Sam moaning and pleading.

\---

John was trying to think of something to say back to his friend. Bobby, the one who always seemed to be there. Bobby, who helped him whenever he needed it. Bobby, who helped raise both of his sons. Bobby, who made him want to be a better person. Bobby...the only other person that he'd--no, that's not right--maybe the only other person that John had loved since Mary.

He wasn't really sure what he was doing. However, he did know that he was currently kissing his best friend right on the mouth. John's mind was telling him to stop, but somehow his everything else was not getting the message. What the hell was he doing?

\---

Castiel had never felt anything like the sensations that Mary was dragging out of his body. He now understood why people did this, the feelings were incredible. He didn't know what to do with his hands, and smiled when Mary grabbed one of them and rested it on the back of her head. He moved his other hand to the side of her face, caressing the soft skin as she bobbed up and down the hard length of his cock.

"Oh, that... that feels amazing," he whispered in a husky voice as she sucked harder on him. His fingers laced into her hair, holding on for dear life. He could feel his body starting to tremble a bit, not quite sure what that meant. When his orgasm hit him it completely took him by surprise, the pleasure coursing through his body unlike anything he had ever felt before.

\---

Dean groaned around Sammy's hard flesh, his hands massaging the younger teen's thighs. He wanted, no needed, to feel Sammy lose control for him. When Sammy moved his foot to lightly brush against Dean's crotch, Dean lost it, cumming in his pants harder than he had cum in quite a while. He sucked harder and faster on Sammy's cock, feeling the other boy tense up beneath him. Dean's mouth was soon filled with Sammy's cum, a flavor he had grown addicted to tasting. He pulled off of Sammy with a wet pop, grinning at his beloved.

They rested on each other for a few minutes before crawling out of the car, Sammy tucking himself back into his pants. They grabbed their bags and went inside. Dean grabbed each of them a beer from the fridge, knowing that Bobby wouldn't mind, and went and sat down on the couch. Sammy sat down next to him and grabbed his hand.

Dean ran a hand over his face, sighing. He really didn't want to talk, but had promised Sammy he would. He didn't want to break his word to Sammy. "This morning... this morning I had a flashback. When I woke up, god, I should have been in such a good mood, I probably would have been had I not woken up where I did. Or woken up alone, and no, don't blame yourself, Baby Boy. It's not your fault I'm broken."

"I was so ashamed... not of anything we had done, that's good and right and pure, but of what I thought I did. Thought I... I thought I cheated on you, and it broke my heart. I thought I had taken the one good thing I have and threw it away like a piece of garbage. God, I wanted to die."

Dean stood, and began pacing the room, "I told you some of it. Some of what I had done. I didn't tell you everything. I didn't tell you that... that I let... I was so messed up, didn't care. My dealer... he set up this thing. I'm not sure how many guys there were... I didn't care... I was so high out of my mind that... I let them do whatever. I woke up three days later. Fuck... Dad was frantic looking for me... I was 14... and that still wasn't enough... enough to get me to clean up my act. I was broken... there wasn't an inch of me that wasn't bruised. I told Dad that I had been jumped... fuck he believed me. He took me to the ER... and god... the doctor... the doctor who was on call... he was one of them. One of the men. Fucker told me he'd get me whatever I wanted if I kept my mouth shut... so I did."

Dean stopped, head down, "He's not around... not anymore. See one day... one day he wanted me to find... find someone to play with. Someone younger to play with so he could watch it. I told him I wouldn't and he tried... I ran, so damn scared of what he would do to me. Didn't know... didn't know that he fell down the stairs. Broke his neck. Fuck I hid, hid for days. Sammy, he's dead because of me... I don't know... I should have told someone but I couldn't, then they'd know. Know what I am."

Dean could tell Sammy was about to say something, and held out his hand. "Please, just let me finish before... I don't know if I'll be able to start up again if I am interrupted." He noticed Sammy nodding at him, and sat down on the floor, wrapping his arms around his knees.

"The thing is... he wasn't the only one... the only one who died. I found out... after I was clean and sober... I found out that pretty much every one of them... every one of the people I was with... is now dead. It terrifies me. I keep thinking... keep thinking that something is gonna happen to you. I couldn't live with myself if anything happened to you. I can't lose you. I try to keep calm, try not to keep looking over my shoulder, but I'm scared, Sammy, so damn scared. What if... what if I run into someone I was with before and they recognize me. What if they see you with me and think... think that you are for sale. Don't want anyone to touch you... not like that. You're mine. I... fuck... Sammy I'm toxic... everything I touch goes wrong."

Dean looked up at Sammy, tears in his eyes, "I love you more than anything in the world... but sometimes I think I shouldn't be with you. I think that you deserve someone who isn't gonna get you killed, get you looked at like you are some piece of meat, like you are nothing but something to be used like me. I don't want to lose you... but I don't want to corrupt you either."

"I love you more than I have words. But... God... Sammy... you're the age I was when I was... when I was selling myself. My dealer... my pimp as he became later... was the age I am now. And it scares me... everything about us scares me as much as it makes me happy. I mean... what happens when you're older... will you still want me? I'm not who I was when I was your age... I don't feel the same way I did... I... fuck... Sammy I need you. Can't live without you... and I'm scared... scared you're gonna grow up resenting me... that I took your choices from you..."

Dean crawled across the floor, resting his head in Sammy's lap, "Tell me I'm wrong, tell me I'm not doing wrong by you, that I didn't take your choices from you, that I didn't force you into anything. Please, Baby, I need to know."

\---

Sammy stared at Dean, letting his brain catch up to everything that Dean had just told him. He knew that it would be a lot. He was expecting it to be a lot to take in. Part of Sam wanted to just erupt into anger. How could anyone ever treat Dean like that? Use him like that? Hurt him like that? It made Sam so angry thinking about anyone hurting his Dean. But he took a deep breath, now was not the time to be getting angry. He didn't want Dean to think that he was getting angry with him. But then there was a part of Sam that was just...sad. He never wanted Dean to be hurt like that. Wished he could've done something--anything--to make sure that Dean was always safe. 

"Dean...I--I'm so sorry," he stood up to wrap his arms around Dean, "You're not doing wrong by me, never want you to think that." Sammy noticed how tight his throat felt and he gripped Dean even closer. There was nothing in the world that he wanted more than Dean. There was nothing that he wouldn't do for Dean. "You didn't take anything from me, I wanted to give you everything--I'd give you more if I could." He cupped the back of Dean's head, massaging the tense neck muscles there. Dean was everything for him. Nothing else in the entire universe would ever be able to compare to Dean, his Dean. All that talk about Sammy eventually wanting something else just seemed ludicrous. Sam was never going to want anything else. Dean was it for him. He knew how crazy it was, but they were engaged for God's sake! How could Dean even think that he had forced Sammy into anything that he didn't want. Sammy wanted all of this. He never thought that he would get anything this good.

"I wish I could take all those things away, wish I could've protected you from all of that," Sammy pulled away, thumbs wiping Dean's tears away. "Nobody deserves all of that...But you? You...I...Fuck, no one should've done those things to you. I fucking love you and I just..." Sam's words got all hung up in his throat--a lack of air and an abundance of tears ready to fall. "No one gets to hurt you Dean, not you." 

He pulled him in for a kiss, it was bruising and lacking in finesse, but passionate. "Dean, nobody's ever gonna hurt you again okay?" Sammy could hear the desperation in his own voice, desperate to let Dean know how much he loved him. "Nobody's gonna hurt me either. Love you too much to ever leave you."

\---

Mary helped Castiel through his orgasm, knowing that he was probably somewhere in a state of shock and bliss combined. She couldn't believe the little noises he'd made and the way his face looked. He was beautiful. Truly a sight to see. Of course, she'd always known that. Castiel had been beautiful from the moment she saw him, but somehow, this changed things. Seeing him so vulnerable and intimately, it only made him more gorgeous. Gingerly, she pushed him back against the mattress and pressed a soft kiss to his lips. Honestly, she didn't care if they got any farther than this, because what she had just witnessed was the best thing that she'd ever gotten to see. 

"I love you," she murmured against his lips. Mary froze for a moment, not believing what she'd just said. She meant it, but she was terrified that it would frighten the angel away. She had already overwhelmed him with so much today.

\---

Bobby didn't know what to think. John was kissing him, his best friend John Winchester was kissing him and it didn't feel wrong, didn't feel weird at all. In fact Bobby knew he could get used to it. He sighed when John pulled away, the other man looking guilty. Couldn't have that now could he. "Idjit," Bobby whispered, pulling John back to him, their lips meeting once more.

\---

Sam sighed contently, running his arms along Dean's back. The two of them were just resting, content to be in each others arms. Sam had missed this, missed being able to be close to Dean like this. He knew that having Dean back in his life like this he would never be able to go back to how things had been, could never go back to just being Dean's younger brother.

\---

Dean let Sammy pull him up so that he was laying on top of the younger teen. Their lips met, Dean needing this to ground him, needing Sammy to be his no matter what. He reached up, intertwining his fingers into Sammy's hair. Dean groaned when Sammy arched up into him, their cocks brushing against each other through their pants. "Oh, fuck, Sammy," Dean moaned, pulling away to pull his shirt over his head, moving to do the same for Sammy. 

Dean started trailing kisses along Sammy's neck, his hands running along the younger boys chest. He moved to undo Sammy's jeans, moaning against his boyfriend's chest as Sammy kicked them off, leaving himself completely bare. Dean licked and kissed and sucked a path down Sammy's chest, pausing to give attention to each of his nipples. He loved feeling Sammy just losing it under him, there was something so pure and good about the feelings he could draw out of the younger boy. 

Dean had never been with anyone like Sammy, someone who didn't just want Dean for his body, someone who actually LOVED Dean. Being with Sammy was like the first time every time, and Dean loved that about him more than he had words for. 

Dean moaned against Sammy's flesh, so worked up at the sounds that were falling from the younger boy's mouth. He pulled back, placing his finger on Sammy's lips to shush him as he undid his own jeans, kicking them off so he could be as naked as Sammy was for him. "Love you, Baby Boy," he whispered, placing a kiss on Sammy's hip. He licked a path to Sammy's hard cock, flicking his tongue out to tease the tip. 

He shoved Sammy back a bit, spreading the boy's legs for him. Dean nuzzled at Sammy's balls, gently licking and kissing them while Sammy snaked his fingers into his hair. "God, so perfect," Dean breathed, his tongue snaking out to tease the other boy. Sammy was cursing above him, causing Dean to groan with want. His tongue brushed against Sammy's hole, the tight ring of muscle fluttering under the touch. He wanted to do so much with Sammy, wanted everything.

\---

Castiel was shocked, Mary loved him? He hadn't known what he had been feeling before, but now he had a name for it, love. He was in love with the woman. She had given up everything because of him, and she still loved him. He pulled her against him, running his fingers through her hair. "Mary. I love you. I do. I didn't have a word for what I felt, but I know now that it's LOVE. I would do anything for you. Just tell me what to do. I want you to teach me, I don't know what to do. You make me feel things I don't have words for. Please, teach me how to take care of you, teach me how to make you feel good."

\---


	10. Changes

John wasn't sure what to do. Suddenly, his hands just felt extremely awkward, like they forgot what their jobs were. His heart was attempting to just crawl it's way right out of his throat. Mostly, he couldn't believe that Bobby had actually pulled him back in for another one. He had thought that the man would surely be freaked out--probably think that he was possessed or something--but this reaction was not the anticipated one. Not that John was complaining.

\---

Mary smiled at Castiel, happy that he felt the way he did. She pulled her shirt over her head and watched the way his eyes widened. He looked like he was shocked that this was what was beneath clothes this entire time. Although, Mary knew that Castiel knew what the human body looked like. After all, he was an angel. He had been around to watch the creation of humans. He'd probably seen bodies that were as close to perfection as any human could be. She grabbed his hand and placed it on her side. Mary could feel that he was trembling, fingers unsure. "It's okay," Mary tipped his jaw up with her hand, making him look at her, "You can touch me."

Slowly, cautiously, his other hand came out to touch her. Mary could feel her skin pebbling underneath the gentle touches. She watched his eyes looking over her. Part of her was worried that he didn't like what he saw. Part of her was too distracted by his hands to care.

\---

Sammy let out hurried breaths, body becoming so aware of every sensation that Dean was giving him. His brain was trying to put some words together in order to form a sentence, but he was struggling with it. Every time he would open his mouth to say words, moans spilled out instead. Sammy could cum just from this, Dean knew his body so well.

"Dean," he managed to moan out his lover's name, "Dean I...fuck oh my god," Sammy could feel his muscles twitching and his body trembling, "Need you, need to feel you in...in me." He knew that he was whimpering at this point, but he was so full of want that he couldn't find the thoughts to care about his whining. He'd beg and plead as much as Dean needed him to in order to feel the boy inside him again. Dean's tongue continued to work, just teasing, never really satisfying. "P-p-please...fuck me...God, Dean please!" He couldn't handle much more. His body was becoming overly sensitive and he needed Dean. There was never a moment where he needed him more. 

After everything that had happened today, all Sammy wanted was the closeness. He needed to feel Dean connected completely to him. He needed to know that there was never going to be anybody else. He needed Dean to know that there was never going to be anybody else. Sammy wanted Dean to know just how much he owned him. There was no one else that Sammy belonged to. Never would be.

\---

Dean felt so comfortable curled up next to Sam. He was trying to remember the last time they had been so close and so comfy together like this. Dean was never going to be able to move past Sam. All the years of trying and he'd never felt as good as he felt right here, next to Sam. This was where he belonged. Sam was the only person that Dean would ever be able to love like this. It wasn't that Dean had never loved anyone else though, he had, but not like this. Nothing was ever like it was when he was with Sam.

\---

It seemed that the kiss went on for hours. When they were done, Bobby and John sat back, turning to face the TV once more in silence. Both men had smiles on their faces, but neither one wanted to talk about what had happened. They knew they would have to eventually, but for now, this was fine. The silence wasn't oppressive or awkward, Bobby and John knew each other too well, so they sat comfortably drinking their beers every so often brushing against each others shoulders.

\---

Castiel was in awe of the woman he was staring at, the woman he loved. There was something about her that drew him. He knew he'd do everything all over again if it meant being able to be with her. His hands ran down her sides tentatively, not quite sure what to do. The thing that amazed him was that she was so patient, so willing to let him do whatever he wanted, to let him learn via her body. He was glad he never went through with it when Dean had tried to get him laid in the past, this was how it was supposed to be, special, with someone he loved and trusted. 

He smiled, leaning in to kiss her once more, enjoying the way her body trembled at his touches. Castiel now understood why Gabriel and Balthazar were so fond of this. The connection was breathtaking and Castiel never wanted to let this woman go. He knew he was probably going to fast, but he never wanted to let Mary go, never wanted to be without her at his side. "Marry me."

\---

Dean groaned, listening to Sammy's pleas. The words were sending shocks of pleasure through him. All Dean wanted to do was make Sammy feel good, show him how much he meant to him, worship him like he deserved. Sammy was begging him though, and it almost made Dean give up his goal of making Sammy fall apart again and again and just taking him then and there. He pulled back, leaving a kiss on Sammy's inner thigh, crawling up the younger teen's body. "Love you so damn much, Sammy," he whispered against Sammy's neck, moving the younger boy's arms around his shoulders.

Dean stood, glad that Sammy understood what he wanted by wrapping his legs around his waist. He kissed his beloved, carrying him up to the guest room. Dean set Sammy down on the bed, his hands running up Sammy's legs. Sammy was moaning, begging Dean to take him, to fuck him, but Dean wanted this to last, needed this to last. He kissed the path his hands had taken, feeling Sammy tremble beneath him. Sammy had snaked his fingers into Dean's hair and began pulling him up his body.

"Hey, Baby," Dean whispered, his lips inches from Sammy's. He let out a moan when Sammy thrust up against him hard, locking his heels against Dean's ass. "Can't wait anymore, can you?"

Dean decided to take pity on Sammy and himself at Sammy's pathetic moan. He groaned, kissing Sammy one more time before leaving him. He ran down the stairs, grabbing his bag before going back to Sammy. Sammy had propped himself up on his elbows, a confused look on his face. Dean reached into the bag, pulling out the tube of lube, "Needed this, Baby Boy. Don't wanna hurt you."

Dean chuckled at the low moan that escaped Sammy's mouth as his lubed fingers probed at the younger teen's opening, the tight ring of muscle gripping his fingers like a vice. He kissed Sammy, their tongues dueling as his fingers stretched his lover open. Dean was panting with need by the time he had Sammy ready, lining his cock up with a shaking hand. "Wanted this to last," he whispered against Sammy's lips, "don't think it's gonna, though."

He started thrusting into Sammy, in slow even strokes, the younger boy holding him tightly against himself. Their fingers were intertwined, and Dean knew he never wanted to give this feeling up for anything.

\---

Sammy moaned at the feel of having Dean inside of him, fingers tangled, breaths combining. Nothing else made Sammy feel like this. No one else made him feel like this. He met every one of Dean's movements with his own. Sammy had his lip sucked between his teeth, biting down maybe a little too hard. It felt so good, almost too good. He let go of Dean's hands in order to pull him down, needed more contact, more heated skin. Dean kissed him, their tongues moving in the same rhythm as their bodies. By this time, Sammy's cock was throbbing, aching with need. But he knew Dean wanted to draw it out, knew that he needed to be patient because Dean always gave him what he needed.

"Dean, God...feel so good," Sammy's words barely making it through his moans. He was falling apart, every part of him feeling like it was about to break, but in the best way possible. It felt so honest this time, so genuine. He didn't feel like Dean was trying to cover anything up, hide anything. Sammy knew that they'd need to talk more, knew that there was more to say, but this time, he knew that Dean would say it. This time, Sammy knew that he wouldn't have to guess what had happened to Dean, because the teen would tell him. And that just made it better.

\---

Mary froze in shock. Her brain moving thousands of miles a second and her body completely unwilling to move at all. Castiel had just asked her...No, she was imagining that. She rethought the moment, and maybe she wasn't imagining that. Why would he ask her that? What good would a marriage to a human do for an angel? 

His hands were still on her; her skin still heated from the touch. She could feel the blood in her veins pulsing and moving. She hadn't heard that question in...Well, John was the last one to ask that question. Everyone knew how that turned out. Marriage had been something that had failed for her. Marriage was something that she thought she would never even consider again. Her last marriage had broken her in so many ways. Everything she had to sacrifice for her family and things still didn't turn out right. Could she even be a good wife anymore? She had been at one point. At one point, being a good wife was something that she took very seriously. But now? She wasn't sure if she could give Castiel everything that he needed.

But then there was this other part. A part that was a little bit selfish and a little bit needy and a little bit in love. That part wanted to practically scream yes. Having the angel in her arms made it impossible for her to think too logically. She'd never wanted another person like she did this perfect being. For all the reasons she knew that she should tell him no, there was this overpowering need to say yes. 

Mary practically pounced on the angel, kissing him too roughly. "Yes, yes, yes." She said in-between kisses. "Oh Cas...yes." Suddenly, she had tears in her eyes. They were completely unwanted, but they didn't seem to care. They fell anyways. She was too happy.

\---

Dean knew that if he died the next day he would die happy. He had finally gotten that horrible secret off his chest, hell he had never told anyone about the deaths, and keeping that to himself had been one of the hardest things he had ever done. Part of Dean wondered if someone or something had interfered on his behalf, killing those men. It wouldn't surprise him if perhaps Gabriel was the one responsible. 

His thoughts were drawn away from such dark things when Sammy wiggled slightly beneath him. Dean looked him straight in the eye, resting his forehead against Sammy's as he slowly slipped in and out of his tight passage. The sounds spilling from Sammy's mouth were driving Dean wild with lust. His fingers tightened around Sammy's, his thrusts starting to come harder and faster. 

Dean loved Sammy more than he had words for, everything the other teen said and did made him fall more and more in love with him. It was hard to believe that they hadn't been having sex for longer than they were as Sammy seemed to know exactly how to move to make Dean go wild. Dean guessed that was just part of them being soulmates, that they were so made for each other that even that aspect of their relationship was as if it had always been there, 

As much as it saddened Dean that he hadn't gotten to grow up with Sammy, Dean was thankful that he hadn't been around back during his dark days. Sammy was too good and pure to go through what Dean did, and he knew that he would have unintentually dragged Sammy into that life. He kissed Sammy once more, letting go off one of Sammy's hands to move it between their bodies, wrapping around Sammy's hard cock.

Dean started stroking the hard length in time with his thrusts, his mouth moving to lick and nip and suck at Sammy's neck when the younger boy dropped his head back against the pillows, moaning in pleasure. "So, pretty, Baby Boy. Mmm, gonna make you feel so damn good. Always gonna take care of you, Darling," he whispered against Sammy's flesh, the boy's empty hand scraping down his back, making Dean moan at the sensation.

Sammy was whimpering and thrusting to meet Dean's hand for every stroke. He could feel Dean's movements starting to fall away from any sort of rhythm, he knew that the boy was close. Sometimes it thrilled him knowing that he was the one who made Dean feel like this. It felt good knowing that he could bring Dean this close to the edge. It made him feel special--wanted. But Sammy's mind was struggling to think because Dean's hand was just moving faster and the friction was starting to be too much. Everything was starting to be too much. Feeling Dean slide over his prostate again and again. Feeling Dean's fingers wrapped tightly around his cock. Feeling Dean's other hand gripping his hips hard enough to leave bruises. It was all so much stimulation.

"Mmm Dean...so...so close," Sammy was panting, gasping with need. 

He watched Dean's face contort with pleasure, could feel Dean cumming inside him. Seeing Dean like that--so out of control and blissed out--pushed Sam over the edge. His orgasm hit him roughly, back arching and a moan echoing loudly in the empty house. Cum painted his stomach and he felt Dean's grip ease up. Slowly, their breathing evened out and Sammy sucked in a quick inhale when Dean pulled out. His skin was still too heated and his muscles still twitched with aftershock.

"Love you so much," Sammy murmured, curling up against Dean's side. "Always..." The word was barely whispered and Sammy wasn't sure if Dean had heard him, but it didn't matter, because Sammy would always love Dean whether Dean knew it or not. 

Dean sighed contently, enjoying the feeling of Sammy pressed up tightly against him. His arms moved to wrap around the younger teen, as Dean thought about how lucky he was to have this beautiful boy call him his. "Love you, Sammy," Dean whispered, placing a gentle kiss against Sammy's forehead. His hands moved in soothing circles across Sammy's back. Soon Dean was dozing, holding his most precious belonging to his chest.

It didn't take long for him to wake once more, but Dean noticed Sammy was still asleep. During their nap Sammy had turned and was now laying next to Dean, a content smile on his face. Dean got an idea, something that he had thought about many times before but had never acted on. He quietly slipped to the foot of the bed, and began gently rubbing and kissing Sammy's feet and legs.

Dean could tell when Sammy woke, the soft intake of breath that the other boy made was a good indication. He looked up, eyes locking with Sammy's as his kisses moved up to the younger teens thighs. "Put your hands on the headboard," Dean ordered in a soft voice, groaning when Sammy complied. Dean massaged the firm muscles under his hand as he trailed his kisses up to Sammy's hips. Dean let out a chuckle when Sammy arched against him, his hard cock rubbing against Dean's cheek.

"Not yet, Baby, wanna play for a while before I take care of that," Dean whispered, his mouth moving to kiss at Sammy's other hip. Dean could hear Sammy whimpering above him, "So needy, Baby, aren't you? Mmm, gonna take care of you, Sweetheart. Gonna worship you like you deserve."

Dean reached up with his hands, pinching Sammy's nipples with one hand while he trailed the other to Sammy's mouth. Dean didn't even have to ask as Sammy instantly took his fingers into his mouth, sucking them as if sucking on Dean's cock. "That's it, Sammy, get them nice and wet," Dean said in a husky voice, nipping at Sammy's navel. 

Dean was so hard himself, but was ignoring his need, wanting to drive Sammy to the brink again and again before taking what he wanted from him. He looked up, noticing Sammy had a death grip on the headboard, "Such a good boy, Sammy, holding on to the headboard like I asked you, not complaining. Mmm, my Good Boy. Gonna treat you good."

Sammy was trembling beneath all of Dean's soft touches and teases. He didn't think that he'd ever felt this loved--worshipped even. His fingers had the the headboard gripped too tightly making his knuckles whiten, but if he held it any looser, he knew that he'd let go. He had to hold on tight to resist the overwhelming urge to touch Dean. Sometimes Sammy thought that's just how he felt all the time. He was either touching Dean or fighting the urge to touch him.

Trying to think of something coherent to say was becoming terribly difficult. He couldn't think straight with Dean's breath skating across Sammy's cock making him shudder. Dean would only suck the tip of him in for a few perfect seconds before pulling off again. Sammy was making little whining noises. He'd accuse the boy of being a tease if Dean's hands weren't stroking and massaging over Sammy's skin in such a loving manner. His brain was trying to think up words, a way to beg, but his voice wasn't being cooperative. Sammy's hips were rolling up trying to feel Dean's mouth again, but instead only got kisses being scattered over his hips and thighs. Sammy was practically quivering.

"Deeeean," Sammy was panting and astonished that he managed to get Dean's name out, "Need. Please."

If he were to think about what he had just said, he'd think about how ridiculous he sounded. Dean. Need. Please. Sammy hoped that Dean could understand what he was attempting to do, his attempted beg. Then again, he felt like those three words had a way of describing how Sammy felt in their relationship. It was all about Dean and needing and begging. Sammy couldn't think of anything else. All he could think about was Dean and how much be needed him and how he'd do anything to get him. 

Dean shuddered above Sammy, the younger boy's begging starting to get to him. 'Enough teasing,' Dean thought. He licked his lips, grinning wickedly up at Sammy. In a lust soaked voice he whispered, "Get on your hands and knees, Baby Boy."

He groaned when Sammy quickly complied, the picture the younger boy made mesmerizing. "Such a good boy, Sammy," Dean said, leaning over to nip lightly at Sammy's ass cheek before straightening up a bit. "Always so good for me." He didn't give Sammy any warning, slamming all the way into him in one fast motion. His hands gripped Sammy's hips hard, and Dean knew that there were going to be bruises there after he was done, but he couldn't be bothered to care.

His hips slammed into Sammy again and again, the head of his cock brushing against Sammy's prostate with each thrust. He could see Sammy reaching under himself, moving to wrap his hand around his cock, "Sammy, did I tell you you could touch yourself?"

Sammy moaned and pushed back against Dean with every thrust. Dean had put him so on edge with all the teasing and prepping, now he was just too needy to care how he sounded. He could feel Dean's fingers making their own marks on his hips, leaving behind little bruises that would be sore later. Every movement seemed to rush him closer and closer to the edge. All of the build up was finally attempting to crumble down. But when Sammy reached to touch his leaking cock, Dean got on to him.

"N-no, you didn't." Sammy whimpered out a response. Dean didn't let his pace ease up at all, it just continued to make Sammy's skin feel like it had erupted into the most pleasurable flames. "Dean please," Sammy was nearly sobbing in pleasure, "So close, need...please." He couldn't believe the sound of his own voice. It sounded completely wrecked and desperate. Though, he didn't know why he was surprised. He felt completely wrecked. Dean always managed to pull out this side of him. This side that was willing to beg, that was willing to be vulnerable. But Dean wasn't giving in to his pleads, the boy just continued gripping Sammy's hips tight slamming into him.

He let out a little surprised yelp when Dean wrapped his arms around Sammy's chest and pulled him up. Dean's hips were still snapping and with the new position, the stimulation only increased. Sammy was no longer capable of begging or pleading, he had been reduced to little whines and whimpers because it felt too damn good. His body jerked when Dean bit down on his neck. For a moment Sammy thought that he might just cum from that.

Dean knew Sammy was close, hell he was close himself, but he wanted to draw this out as long as he could. He slowed his thrusts even more, licking and nibbling at the abused flesh of Sammy's neck. He grabbed Sammy's hands forcing them over his head, "Hold onto the headboard, Baby Boy."

He groaned when Sammy complied, the complete trust and adoration that Dean could see in Sammy's eyes was intoxicating. He pulled out of Sammy completely, hearing him whimper and whine at the loss. "Shh, Sweetheart, it's okay. Gonna take good care of you, gonna make you feel so damn good. Close your eyes for me."

When Sammy did Dean straddled his hips, groaning as he felt the tip of Sammy's cock brush against his hole. He threw his head back in pleasure, biting his lip as he sunk down Sammy's hard length. He rose up again, almost pulling off Sammy completely, only to rock back down against him in a quick motion. It was over too soon, both of them worked up beyond belief. When Sammy came deep inside of Dean it sent him over the edge, his orgasm tearing through his body like a jolt of lightning. He came all over Sammy's chest, his cum hitting Sammy in the face. 

Dean groaned as he watched Sammy stick out his tongue to lick at the cum covering his lips, his cock giving an interested twitch. Dean stayed seated on Sammy, not allowing him to pull out of his body. He whispered words of love and devotion to the younger boy, hands running over his cum covered chest. He rocked against his brother, moaning with pleasure when he could feel Sammy getting fully hard once more. 

"Let go of the headboard," Dean whispered, rolling them so that Sammy was on top when he did. "Want you to fuck me hard and fast, Sammy. Can you do that for me, Baby Boy?"

Sammy's body was almost aching with how overstimulating this all was--in every aspect. Everything about Dean made his body thrum with want and need. It seemed as though it would always be over too soon, no matter how long they spent drawing it out. 

"Y-yeah," Sammy blushed at how shakey his voice turned out to be. He pulled Dean into another kiss, tongue sliding out to meet Dean's. Sammy kissed Dean's neck, breathing in his scent. It was some indescribable--the way Dean smelled--something like sunshine and smoke and a little something else that couldn't be described in words. His hands made feather-light touches over Dean's sides and arms before intertwining their fingers together. He smiled against the other boy's skin when he felt Dean's breath quicken. "Love you so much."

Sammy pulled back long enough to line himself up; he groaned at the sight of his own cum in Dean's hole. He hovered back over Dean, wanting to kiss him again--he always wanted to kiss him again. Sammy pressed in slowly to start with, not wanting to cum too early. Sometimes it was hard to control with Dean. It didn't take long for his pace to quicken as Dean continued to arch into every movement that Sammy made. All the little noises that Dean made were stunning. He leaned back to get more leverage, taking a firm hold onto the back of Dean's thighs. Dean's body tightened and released continually, drawing more and more pleasure out of Sammy's own body. This time wasn't going to last long, but how could Sammy control himself when Dean was the hottest sight he could ever see? 

Dean groaned, his hands grasping at Sammy's back as his lover pounded into him again and again, words of love and devotion spilling out of the younger boy's mouth. Nothing had ever felt so pure and good as Sammy inside of him, as if Sammy was washing away all the badness that had been done to Dean with his seed, making Dean good and clean and right. He arched his head back, cursing when he felt Sammy bite down gently on his neck, marking him once more as his.

Dean came, his hot semen covering their stomachs. Moans fell from his mouth, and the words, "Sammy" "Mine" "Good" "Love" repeated over and over. He could feel Sammy tense up, the younger teen coming inside him, still pumping into him with jerky motions. Dean pulled Sammy against his chest, caressing his back as they lay panting. "I love you, Sammy. Love you more than I can possibly ever tell you."

\---

Sam woke, his hands tied to the headboard, Dean straddling his lap, slowly riding Sam. He bit back a curse, wishing he could touch his older brother, wishing he could do more than just take what Dean was giving him. "Dean, fuck, love you."

He could see Dean smiling down at him, and Sam longed to reach up and caress him. Sam's body arched as Dean began to tease his nipples, fingers lightly rubbing and pinching them as he rose up and down Sam's length. He had missed this, not just the sex, though he wouldn't complain about that, but the closeness. The complete and utter ultimate trust that Dean was showing him. He had missed seeing Dean's face so open and unguarded, missed seeing Dean just let go of everything and just feel.

\---

Castiel grinned, kissing Mary softly, his hands cupping her face as if he was worshiping her. The kiss was gentle but at the same time filled with a passion that was almost scorching. He fell backwards against the bed, pulling his fiance with him. He rolled them so he was on top of her and smiled softly. Castiel might not have that much experience, but he wanted to treat Mary properly.

His mouth began to explore her body, fingers caressing her skin as he mapped her flesh. The small breathy moans that slipped from her mouth were telling him that she was enjoying what he was doing to her. His fingers moved down to her crotch, and he was briefly overwhelmed at how wet she was for him.

"Mary, this is alright, isn't it?" he asked her, eyes locked on hers.

Sammy nuzzled his face into Dean's neck, pressing little kisses there through his own heavy breathing. "Love you too Dean," Sammy felt like he would never be able to say it enough. There was no way for him to truly express how he felt about Dean. Words would never cut it. Actions would never cut it. Sammy wasn't sure how to make Dean understand just quite how much he loved him, but he was willing to spend the rest of his life trying to.

"Never gonna let you go," Sammy murmured, tracing his fingers up and down Dean's arms before lacing their fingers together. Pressing a final kiss to the older boy's throat, he pulled away enough to look into his lover's beautiful eyes. Part of Dean was always so visible in his eyes; sometimes Sammy felt like he could just read the boy's mind. But it wasn't always so clear. Those same transparent green eyes could turn mysterious within seconds. Then again, that was part of the reason Sammy loved him. "You're so..." Sammy searched for the right word, but couldn't find the perfect one so he settled, "beautiful."

\---

Dean looked down at Sam. He loved the way his brother looked beneath him, helpless and completely consumed with pleasure. "Look so good Baby Boy," Dean dipped down long enough to kiss him, "all tied up, no where to go." He gave a roll of his hips and smirked at the moan it drew out of Sam. Sam did look good. Wrists tugging at the restraints just a little, sweat starting to make a sheen over every finely strung muscle, and hips rolling up against him. Sam looked like perfection.

He continued with his slow pace. Despite the fact that he wanted to speed up, he enjoyed watching Sam struggle and attempt to get him to move faster. "Gonna make you beg for it," Dean pressed his hands flat onto Sam's chest, pushing himself up and sliding back down. "Used to beg me all the time Sammy remember?" Dean winked, amazed that he was managing to keep his composure. "Wanted me all the time when we were younger." Dean wondered if maybe he wanted to confirmation that Sam still wanted him that much, but whether he wanted that or not, Sam was still so hot like this.

\---

Mary was amazed at how gentle and perfect Castiel's touches were. They were cautious and curious, but never prodding or demanding. Now, he was staring at her with slightly scared, but mostly adoring eyes. She gave him a smile, "It's more than alright," Pulling him down, Mary kissed him again. Their lips settled into a slow, warm slide, tongues grazing and teasing. His hands still exploring and Mary's hands doing the same. She loved that it was all so explorative, learning and mapping. Castiel was stunning, truly something divine. All Mary could think about was how she was little grasping onto perfection and perfection was holding onto her just as tightly.

"Cas," Mary attempted to speak, but it came out more of a breathless moan, "I...I want you." She wasn't sure how else to put it into words. She wanted Castiel in every way, shape, and form. Mary just wanted him.

\---

Dean held Sammy all through the night, only letting him go long enough for them to get up to eat and drink and use the bathroom. When morning came Dean woke with a smile on his face. He looked down at Sammy, leaning to kiss him gently awake. As soon as Sammy blinked up at him, Dean rose from the bed, holding his hand out to Sammy. In silence they made their way to the bathroom.

Dean turned on the shower, getting the water to the proper temperature before stepping under the spray. Sammy leaned against his chest, placing gentle kisses on his neck and shoulders. Dean grabbed the soap, and began to wash Sammy, his hands lingering in certain spots. When he was done he handed the soap to Sammy, who quickly returned the favor. Taking the soap from Sammy's hands Dean grabbed the shampoo, working it into Sammy's hair, enjoying the pleasured groans that spilled from the younger boy's mouth. 

Before Dean was finished washing Sammy's hair, Sammy had dropped to his knees, taking Dean's eager cock into his mouth, sucking him for all he was worth. Dean's hands stilled on Sammy's head, fingers entwined in his hair as Sammy bobbed up and down his length. Choked off curses and moans of pleasure spilled from Dean's mouth as Sammy worked him hard and fast. His cock throbbed with pleasure and he knew this would end soon if he didn't stop Sammy.

Gently he pushed Sammy away, quickly finishing washing Sammy's hair then doing his own just as quickly. He spun Sammy around, grinning when Sammy braced himself against the shower wall. Dean grabbed onto the boy's hips, plunging into his still slick passage with a groan. He kissed and licked and nipped at Sammy's neck as he fucked into him. Sammy was moaning, body trembling with want and need. He could feel Sammy tighten around him, and heard the boy give a startled curse as he began to cum hard and fast. Sammy's orgasm forced Dean's out of him, and he moaned as his cock spilled his hot cum inside Sammy.

Sammy practically went limp against the shower wall, letting Dean hold him firmly there. All of his muscles were completely relaxed and his head was buzzing with pure bliss. They stood like that for a little while, pressed against each other, water keeping them warm. Sammy whined a little when Dean pulled away, but Dean just calmly told him that he was going to clean them off. He didn't mind when Dean rinsed him clean, and he especially didn't mind the little kisses he left as he cleaned. Dean chuckled at him when he helped Sammy stumble out of the shower and get dried off. Honestly, Dean had completely worn him out--not that he was complaining in the least.

They both collapsed on the bed, still naked, damp, and a little chilly, but that was okay because they just cuddled together. Sammy knew that Dean would fall asleep soon, he could hear it in the way Dean's breath had evened and his heart has slowed to a contented beat.

"Hey Dean?" Sammy snuggled his head closer into Dean's chest, "Everything in the past? That doesn't matter...I just...I love you." He wasn't quite sure why he felt the need to say it. Sammy knew how much Dean regretted his past, knew how much Dean hated himself for all the choices he'd made, but Sammy didn't hate him, Sammy didn't have regrets about Dean. Sure, he wished that Dean would've never had to go through all of those things, but he loved Dean just the way he was. As much as he hated--truly hated--everything that Dean had went through, he wondered what things would be like if Dean hadn't went through them. Would they even be together? No, he didn't like that thought. He wouldn't linger in any place where he couldn't have Dean.

Sammy didn't say anything else, just snuggled as close as he could get to Dean. If he could never have anything else but Dean, things would be all right. He never felt as complete and happy as when he was close to Dean. 

\---

Castiel blinked, his eyes staring at the ceiling. For a brief moment he didn't know where he was, but then he felt Mary curl up against his side. A smile came across the angel's face, as his hands slowly traveled up and down her back. He had never felt anything quite like the night they had shared together in all his many years. He could feel himself starting to respond to her closeness, his cock hardening, his breath starting to come faster.

As gently as he could, Castiel pulled away from Mary, moving her so she was on her back. He trailed kisses down her neck towards her chest. He could tell when she awakened, her fingers snaked into his hair, and she moaned so prettily as he took one of her nipples into his mouth, twirling his tongue over the peaked flesh. His fingers teased her other nipple, as his other hand moved down between her legs. His fingers teased at her clit, causing Mary to moan in pleasure.

He could feel her tugging on his hair and looked up, their eyes locking. He leaned up, kissing her softly as his fingers teased her. Castiel let out a startled moan when she flipped them, moving to straddle him. His hands gently rested on her hips as she sunk down his length, the two of them moaning almost in unison when he was fully inside of her. Castiel smiled as Mary began to rise and lower herself on him, loving that she wanted him as much as he wanted her.

His hands moved up to her chest, teasing and stroking her nipples as she rode him, head thrown back in ecstasy. Their moans filled the room, that and the sound of flesh meeting flesh. Castiel reached up, pulling Mary down to kiss him before flipping them so he was on top. He felt her wrap her legs around his waist as he thrust into her, fingers entwined in her hair as he kissed and licked and sucked at her neck. His thrusts grew in intensity, his body tight wit pleasure.

Mary began trembling beneath him, her body shaking as orgasm struck. Castiel's cock was grasped in a vice like grip as her channel spasmed due to her orgasm. He moaned, his body shaking as he came deep inside of her, filling her with his seed. He kissed her gently as they came down from their orgasms, holding her tightly against his chest. Nothing had prepared him for anything like this, this feeling of completion, of wholeness, of being.

Mary tugged him down for a kiss, letting their tongues roll against each other. She'd had sex before, but it wasn't until now that she realized she had never made love. Castiel made her feel things that she didn't think were possible to feel. Her body was completely aware of every single touch he gave her. It was like he made her nerves become alive every time he touched her. She held him tightly, never wanting to let go. "I love you," she murmured, giving a slight roll of her hips to emphasize her point. 

She smiled at the look he had in his eyes. They were somewhere between lust-blown and overwhelmed. Mary felt a little weird knowing that she was currently pressed up against an angel completely naked, but when Cas' hips rolled back against hers, she couldn't remember what felt weird in the first place. She quirked an eyebrow up when she felt him hardening again, "That was quick," she chuckled. His face started turning red and he ducked his head in embarrassment. "No, no," she gripped his face, "It's...that's a good thing...maybe an angel thing?" She kissed him again just for extra reassurance that everything was okay.

Mary rolled him onto his back and kissed her way down his neck, "Don't worry Cas, gonna take care of you," she murmured he voice thick and sweet. Mary took her time enjoying and worshipping Castiel's skin. He was truly a divine masterpiece. Mary nipped at his hip bone, smiling when his hips raised a little. Not waiting any longer, she slid his tongue up the length of Castiel's cock. He let out a little, soft moan, but she knew that she could draw more out of him. Sucking the head between her lips, she almost grinned at Cas' more eager moan. Mary started wondering about all the sounds she would be able to get out of Cas. 

\---

Sam and Dean pulled up in front of Mary's house at the same time Dean and Sammy did. Sam smirked, noticing the completely bliss filled expression on the boys faces, happy that they had gotten some rest the previous day. After the prior morning, with Dean having his flashback, Sam knew that the two of them needed to talk in private. He smiled, pulling Sammy into a hug and kissing him on the forehead, watching as his brother hugged Dean. Soon they switched places, Sam taking the younger Dean into his arms.

The four of them walked into the house, only to be assaulted by the soft moaning coming from Mary's bedroom. They could hear her voice and Castiel's, and knew exactly what the two of them were up to. Sam nodded at the door, and the four of them made a hasty retreat, driving back to Sam and Dean's motel room. 

Sam was trying to behave himself, but something about the two teenagers drove him mad with lust, drove all sense of reason from his mind. He soon found himself pulling Sammy onto his lap, hands snaking into the teen's hair as he kissed him hard. He could feel Sammy hardening in his jeans and rocked up to grind his own erection against the boy's. Sammy had wrapped his arms around his neck, and Sam moved his hands to cup his ass, kneading the firm flesh. He pushed Sammy away gently, pulling his shirt over his head and doing the same to the teen before opening his pants. 

He let out a sigh when Sammy left his lap, but he noticed the boy was only removing his pants. He finished undressing himself, then pulled Sammy back onto his lap. His fingers caressed Sammy's ass, before moving down to brush at his asshole.

\---

Dean watched as his brother made out with Sam, cock hardening in his pants. He could feel the other Dean come up behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist. Dean laid his head back against the older man's shoulder, grinding his ass against his cock. Dean felt a hand snake into the front of his pants, and let out a groan as the hand wrapped around his cock. 

\---

Sam looked up, noticing how the Deans were intertwined, watching him and Sammy with undisguised lust on their faces. He reached out blindly, finding the tube of lube that was on the bed, opened it an poured some on his fingers before moving his hand back down to Sammy's hole. His fingers brushed against the tight ring of muscle, causing Sammy to moan with pleasure. He slid one inside of the boy, addicted to the breathy moans that spilled from his lips. One finger soon became two, then three, and Sammy was begging him to fuck him. Sam grinned, pulling his fingers out and moving to cover his cock with the leftover lube. He grabbed Sammy by the hips, moving him over his cock. Sam let out a moan as Sammy sank down his length, cursing when he was fully inside of him.

Sammy's breath could barely make it out of his mouth; he felt like maybe he didn't even need to breathe anymore anyways. The rush of Sam being inside of him, of feeling something that didn't quite feel like Dean did. Sammy rocked his hips back and noticed how Sam's fingers tightened their grip on his hips. Both of them were caught up in watching their Deans, and yet, they were both caught up in each other too. Sammy felt like he didn't know where to put his attention because everything was so perfect. He gasped when Sam bit his shoulder, just a nip, causing Sammy to arch back once more. Sam's hands moved away from his hips, running their way up his chest and shoulders and neck. Sammy knew that his own hands were already on their way to being that size, but it didn't change how intense the feeling was of Sam's hands seemingly covering most of his body.

"Sam please," Sammy whimpered out, knowing that Sam was holding back a little, drawing things out. He knew that Sam liked to draw things like this out and he did too, but Sam was making him way too needy and it didn't help that he was watching his Deans going at it. Sammy wanted everything.

\---

Dean loved how pliant his younger self's body was against his. He loved how Dean just relaxed into him like he trusted him completely. Dean would be lying if he said that he didn't get a slight thrill from knowing that someone trusted him that much. He kissed Dean's exposed neck, nipping and licking along the way. It didn't take long for Dean to remove both of their clothes and grab the lube away from Sam. Dean ran his hands over the teen's body before slicking his fingers to prep him. He smirked at the little noises that Dean was making, needy little breaths. He was amazed at how needed both of the boys were, but he supposed that he and Sam were very similar when they were in high school.

Not wanting to wait anymore, Dean claimed the boy's lips in a rough kiss. He shoved him against the wall, knowing that it probably hurt a little--but if he knew himself--he liked it. The younger Dean willingly wrapped his legs around Dean's hips. Dean was ravaging the boy's chest and neck, almost growling with need. Hearing his Sammys moaning and gasping for each other didn't help him tone down the want that was currently pulsing through his body.

"Gonna fuck you Baby," Dean whispered right against Dean's ear, feeling the shudder through the teen's body. "Gonna make you feel so good," He smiled at the little gasp Dean made before rolling his hips forward. He didn't need anymore signs to finally sink the teen down onto his cock. He let out a soft moan, "God, so good for me, so fucking good."

Dean let out a low moan, his head falling back to rest on the wall behind him. The older Dean was thrusting up into him with slow teasing thrusts, causing a steady moan to slip past Dean's lips. Dean wrapped his arms around the older man's neck, drawing his face near so that he could kiss him. Their tongues dueled, mapping each others mouths. Dean groaned with pleasure every time the other man's cock would brush against his prostate. His own cock was hard, trapped between their bodies, the friction being almost, but not quite enough for him.

"Dean, please," he begged, motioning at the bed with one hand. The older man seemed to know what he was asking, walking towards the bed, tossing Dean down onto it next to where Sam and Sammy were fucking. By that point Sam had Sammy on his back, so Dean reached over, interlocking his fingers with Sammy's. He let out a curse as the older Dean reentered him, leaning up to kiss the man.

He could feel a hand on his cock, and looked down to see Sam had reached over to him. The man's large hand surrounded him, jerking him in time with the thrusts he was giving Sammy. "Oh, fuck," Dean moaned, "God, that is hot." And it was, it was one of the hottest things he had ever seen: him on his back, legs wrapped around and older version of himself getting fucked hard, while an older version of his beloved Sammy was bent over Sammy, taking him with hard yet at the same time maddeningly slow strokes. The older Dean had reached over, stroking Sammy's cock. Dean could see that Sam and Dean were kissing above him, both of them still fucking into him and Sammy at a leisurely pace. Dean turned his head, leaning it towards Sammy.

Dean smiled when Sammy turned to him, their lips meeting. The kiss spoke of love and desire, but in many ways it felt like their first kiss all over again, like a new page in their story was being formed. Dean pulled back from the kiss to let out a startled moan as his orgasm hit him out of no where, cock spilling hot ropes of cum across his and Dean's chests and Sam's hand. His body shook, ass clenching down tightly onto Dean's cock and with a few hard thrusts he could feel the older man coming within him, filling him once more. 

Sammy was whimpering at all the stimulation. Sam's cock working inside him, Dean's mouth against his, and the other Dean's hand curled snugly around Sammy's cock. He was surprised that he managed to get out a single breath at all. He was breathing roughly against Dean's lips when Dean pulled back, moaning loudly, and Sammy was awestruck by how beautiful his face looked when he came. They all groaned at the sight of Dean cumming--and Sammy couldn't blame them. However, he couldn't stare for very long because his own orgasm was slamming into him hard enough to make his body shake and convulse. Dean's hand was still working him, and continued to work his cock until Sammy was begging for him to stop because he was too sensitive. 

Sammy was still making little noises while Sam pounded into him, desperate to cum. Sam's hips stuttered and his eyes shut tightly as he came. 

\---

Dean's eyes were glued on Sam; he loved watching his little brother fall apart like that, losing himself so completely in pleasure. Feeling his own orgasm approaching, Dean gripped the back of Sam's neck and yanked him over into a rough kiss. Sam quickly swallowed up all of Dean's moans and Dean was happy that Sam's arms were gripping him otherwise he might've collapsed from all that built up pressure finally releasing into wonderful waves of his orgasm.

All of them were breathing roughly and Dean let out a soft chuckle before rolling the other Dean over on top of him, relaxing into the mattress. The boy pressed a few kisses on his chest and neck, snuggling his head under Dean's chin. Dean glanced down, noticing that Sammy and Dean's hands were intertwined together, Sam pressed against Sammy's back. The room was a little too warm and smelled entirely of them, but Dean was perfectly content.

When Dean woke up he was alone in the bed with Sam. The older man smiled at him, leaning over to give him a quick kiss. Dean gave him a questioning look, to which he was told that Dean and Sammy had left to go get them some food and would be back shortly. Dean was glad that Sam had stayed with him, even though he could tell that the man had been awake for some time already.

He leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on the side of Sam's neck, smiling against Sam's flesh when he began to moan. Dean soon found himself on his back with Sam trailing kisses down his chest. His cock was so hard, then again lately it felt as if he was turned on more often than he wasn't. He cursed when Sam's large hand wrapped around his cock, gently stroking him, not enough to get him off but more than enough to make Dean shudder with want.

\---

Sam smiled as he worked his way across Dean's chest. The sounds coming from the young man were driving him insane with lust. Part of Sam knew that he should worry about just how lost in each other the four of them were becoming, he knew damn well that his Dean probably had Sammy in the backseat of the Impala as they spoke, fucking the teen's more than willing body. To think that Sammy had been a virgin less than a week prior, and Dean, this beautiful sexy young version of Dean, hadn't had sex in well over a year. 

Sam wanted to fuck the young man underneath him, make him scream his name. They had all done a lot together, but this would be the first time that Sam had this Dean all to himself and he planned on making it good. He grinned up at Dean, before moving quickly down his body to take the young man's cock into his mouth. Dean was moaning so prettily beneath him, legs spread wide to accommodate Sam. Sam's hand moved to Dean's hole, still slick from their earlier play. His fingers slipped inside easily, and he hummed with pleasure around Dean's cock as the boy grabbed his hair and started babbling happy turned on sounds when Sam's fingers found his prostate. 

Sam himself was hard as a rock, and needed to be inside of Dean before he lost it. He pulled off of Dean's cock, causing the boy to whimper with loss. When he pulled his fingers out of Dean's boy Dean moaned out a pathetic "no", but Sam hushed him with a kiss as he lined up his cock with the tight ring of muscle before sliding inside of him slowly. 

\---

Dean grabbed the back of Sam's head, pulling him in for another kiss as the hunter gently began to thrust in and out of his body. In all the times the two of them had done this, they had never gone this slow, never been so gentle, and Dean knew that Sam was making love to him, not just fucking him. It was overwhelming to Dean. The only other person who had ever made love to him was Sammy, and to have Sam doing the same made him fall even more in love with the man than he already had. Dean knew he would never love anyone as intensely or purely as he loved Sammy, but he knew that Sam was coming in close second.

\---

Sammy was currently straddling Dean in the Impala. He had been a little shocked when they pulled into an empty parking lot after getting some food and a lot shocked when Dean told him to get out of the car before tugging him into the backseat with Dean. Their lips were sliding and crushing against each other; the kiss almost stinging. Sammy was briefly worried that someone would catch them, but he knew that Dean would never put them at any risk--he trusted the man. His thought couldn't linger too long because Dean's rough hands were slipping beneath his t-shirt, grazing over the scars there and keeping the touch incredibly light.

"Dean," Sammy half-choked out against Dean's neck. Vaguely, he registered that maybe that was some sort of beg or plead, but he wasn't quite sure what he was begging or pleading for. It felt like all Sammy was capable of was wanting. He just wanted. He wanted his Dean, he wanted this Dean, and he wanted Sam. There was so much to want.

"S'okay Sammy, I got you," Dean moved his fingers around to unbutton Sammy's jeans. Shifting to get both of their jeans unbuttoned, unzipped, and their aching cocks out was a little awkward and Sammy nearly fell off of Dean's lap, but they managed. 

Dean quickly got a hand around both their cocks, stroking quickly. Sammy sucked and kissed at Dean's neck and collarbone between moans and gasps. Both of them were rocking their hips up, needing release. In the back of Sammy's mind, the moment reminded him of the very first time his Dean had fooled around with him, how desperate they both were, how they'd barely known each other. Those thoughts only fueled Sammy closer to the edge and with a weak cry of Dean's name, he was cumming over the man's fist.

\---

Dean was stunned at the sight before him. Sammy cumming was so perfect. He could remember when his Sam was like this. Always so desperate and needy and barely taking anything to push him over the edge. But seeing Sammy was just as good. Sammy was breathing harshly against Dean's neck, trying to catch his breath. Dean loved the closeness and being able to feel the teen's breath on his skin; that was all it took and then Dean came over his own fist, letting out of a soft whimper.

They hadn't spent very long in the back seat, but Dean figured that they should probably head back to the motel...and then they should probably be getting the boys back to their mother before Mary started to worry (although she hadn't seemed like she was worrying much with Cas in her bedroom, but Dean didn't want to think about that).

\---

Sammy kept glancing over at Dean while they drove back. He knew that his own face was still flushed and he really wanted to change out of his clothes now that they had some newfound potential stains on them. However, he couldn't keep his eyes off the man. He could see Dean shift a little under the scrutiny, but Dean didn't look uncomfortable. Sometimes it amazed Sammy how similar both of the Deans were. Sometimes it amazed Sammy how different both of the Deans were. He wondered if maybe Dean felt that way about him and Sam.

How did they all end up so similar and so different?

Dean glanced back over at Sammy briefly--just a flash of green eyes--and that alone made Sammy shiver. He was such a sucker for green eyes. 

\---

When Dean heard the Impala pulling in outside of the motel room his heart began to pound. As much as he loved being with Sam, and there was no question that he loved his time with him, knowing that his Sammy was nearby, knowing that he could touch and hold his Sammy made  
him start to turn into a sap. He knew he had a stupid grin on his face, but hell, it was Sammy, his lover, his best friend, his fiance, his brother, his reason for waking up in the morning, his everything. 

He couldn't wait to see Sammy, and made his way to the door, ignoring the fact that he was completely naked. When the door opened and Sammy and Dean walked in he grabbed Sammy, pulling the younger boy into his arms, kissing him like he hadn't seen him in months rather than a few hours. Sammy practically melted into his embrace, wrapping his arms around Dean's neck. Dean rested his hands on Sammy's ass, moaning into the kiss when Sammy wrapped his legs around his waist.

A small part of Dean noticed that the door had opened and closed once more and that the Impala was pulling away from the motel, but he was lost in his little world with Sammy. He could feel Sammy growing hard inside of his jeans and moved them towards the bed, laying the younger  
boy down before he began to undress him. When Sammy was naked Dean let out a shaky breath before leaning forward to kiss a path down his body. He sucked marks along Sammy's chest, nipping at his flesh lightly. He sucked on Sammy's nipples until they were stiff peaks, relishing the pleasured moans coming from his beloved's mouth.

Sammy was thrusting up against him so he reached down, grabbing Sammy's cock in his hand. He squeezed it tightly, looking up at Sammy's face as he whispered, "Not yet. Don't want you to cum until I'm in you, Sammy."

It was like those words ripped open something inside of Sammy, and Dean shuddered with want as the younger teen began to moan steadily. He worked his way down to Sammy's navel, giving it a quick kiss before moving lower. Dean gave the head of Sammy's cock a quick kiss and then  
moved to trail kisses along his inner thighs. He nuzzled Sammy's balls with his cheek before kissing and licking them, taking both into his mouth at once which caused Sammy to let out an almost sob of frustration. "Turn over," Dean whispered, smiling as Sammy complied.

Dean licked his lips as he took in Sammy's body stretched out before him. He grabbed Sammy's hips, angling the boy's ass up before he leaned forward and began to lick at the tight ring of muscle. He could taste the older Dean on Sammy and let out a small moan of his own before he began to lick with more intensity, wanting to taste nothing but his beloved Sammy. He groaned when Sammy reached back to hold himself open for Dean, allowing Dean's tongue to move farther inside of him.

Sammy was whimpering underneath him, begging Dean for more. Dean groaned, he needed to be inside of Sammy, he couldn't wait any longer. "Fuck," Dean breathed, reaching towards the pillow for the lube he knew was there. He quickly slicked himself up before moving so the  
head of his cock was resting at Sammy's opening. His moaned in ecstasy as he slowly sank into Sammy's tight heat.

\---

Sammy wasn't quite sure where all this was coming from, but he certainly wasn't about to start complaining. He'd barely even registered when the other Sam and Dean left the motel room--not even thinking about the fact that they didn't have any other ride. All he could focus on was the fact that Dean had plastered himself against Sammy from the moment that he walked through the door. Of course, Sammy was just as bad, plastering himself against his brother only a fraction of a second later.

It hadn't been very long since Sammy'd cum last, but the fact that Dean was naked and holding him was provoking his cock right back to life. Dean had kissed him fiercely, laid him on the bed, stripped him down, and started to drive poor Sammy even more wild. His body was definitely interesting now. 

Sammy groaned and pleading at all of Dean's touches, getting louder once Dean's tongue had settled in to torture him. The boy could only take so much before he was reduced down to nothing but begging and whimpering. All he wanted was for Dean to make him cum. Mouth, hands, cock, didn't matter. Sammy just needed. He heard Dean curse before the slick sound of lube and then the blunt pressure of Dean's cock. Sammy gasped as Dean slowly sank into him. He felt like it had been too long since it had been like this. Desperate and loving and nothing but adoration and passion between them--just them.

"Dean," Sammy whimpered out, gripping his fingers into the sheets. He could feel as Dean pressed himself against Sammy's back, kissing his neck. Dean hadn't started to move--not really--instead just rolling his hips a little. The movement was making Sammy delirious with want; Dean was brushing over every spot inside him. Voice low and rough with lust, Sammy could hear his brother saying little encouraging things. He was telling Sammy how much he loved him, how perfect he was, how much he wanted him. He had Sammy shaking before he ever moved out and back in.

Finally, Dean began moving (Sammy assumed that his own want had gotten the best of him) but it was still slow and sensual. Sammy was pressing back against Dean, letting himself feel just how wonderful Dean was. Sammy was losing himself in it. He was losing himself in Dean. Sammy adored the other Sam and Dean, but nothing was compared to his Dean. No, nothing would ever be able to compare to the man he fully intended on marrying. Dean was his everything. The way that Dean made him feel was something that no one else had ever been able to give to him. Dean made him feel complete and wanted and loved for every part of himself. No matter what, Sammy knew that he would do everything he could to keep from ever losing Dean.

\---

Dean groaned as he slowly made love to Sammy, and he knew that was exactly what he was doing. What he did with Sam and the other Dean, as much as he hated to admit it, was just sex. It was true he loved them, just not to the all encompassing, obsessive level he loved Sammy. It would hurt if he lost either of them, but it would kill him if he ever lost Sammy. He pulled out, needing to see Sammy's face. When Sammy let out a whimper of loss, he whispered, "Need to see you, Sammy. Need to see your face." 

He helped Sammy roll onto his back before settling between his legs once more, slowly entering the younger boy's tight heat. Dean groaned when Sammy wrapped his legs around his waist, pulling Dean closer against him. It amazed Dean just how well they fit together, as if they were made for this, made to be with each other in this way. Dean sucked a mark onto Sammy's neck, and shuddered with need when Sammy began to moan with pleasure. "Love you, you have no clue how damn much I love you, Sammy."

Dean began to thrust in and out of Sammy's body, his movements slow. It wasn't as though he was trying to tease Sammy with the speed of his thrusts, rather he wanted this to last, he wanted, no needed to reclaim his beloved. He could feel Sammy tense under him, and let out a yelp of pained-pleasure when Sammy's fingernails dug into the back of his neck as he began to shake violently as his orgasm ripped through him, covering both Dean and Sammy's chests with hot cum. "Oh, fuck, Sammy," Dean moaned, as Sammy's body clenched around him, the vice-like grip pulling Dean's orgasm out of him.

Dean collapsed against Sammy's chest, head resting on the boy's shoulder, and he lay there panting, moaning Sammy's name as aftershocks rocked his body. "Love you, Baby Boy, love you so damn much."

\---

Sam smiled over at his brother, taking a sip of his beer as they watched the stars. They could be back in their motel room with the teen versions of themselves, but Sam knew somehow that they needed some time alone. He leaned over, resting his head on Dean's shoulder, enjoying this closeness that had been missing for far too long. Sam knew that eventually they would need to get back, but for now he was content to just sit watching the stars with his beloved big brother.

\---

Castiel smiled at the woman in his arms, his hands running along her back. He knew it was dark out, that they had spent most of the day in bed together, and was starting to feel a bit guilty as the boys were supposed to be home by now and he could tell they weren't. He hoped that they were with Sam and Dean, and not off somewhere hurt or in danger. 

\---

John shook his head, handing Bobby a beer as the other man changed the channel to a sports network. It wasn't that they were really watching, but the TV on in the background gave them both an out, a way of hiding their embarrassment and insecurities over what was happening between them. John wasn't sure how the change in their relationship was going to affect their future, but he knew without a doubt he couldn't see his life without Bobby at his side.

\---


End file.
